Counsels for the Church - Ellen G. White

household.
Your spirit is wrong. When you take a position, you do not weigh the
matter well and consider what must be the effect of your maintaining your
views and in an independent manner weaving them into your prayers and
conversation, when you know that your wife does not hold the same views
that you do. Instead of respecting the feelings of your wife and kindly
avoiding, as a gentleman would, those subjects upon which you know you
differ, you have been forward to dwell upon objectionable points, and have
manifested a persistency in expressing your views regardless of any around
you. You have felt that others had no right to see matters differently from
yourself. These fruits do not grow upon the Christian tree.
My brother, my sister, open the door of the heart to receive Jesus. Invite
him into the soul-temple. Help each other to overcome the obstacles which
enter the married life of all. You will have a fierce conflict to overcome your
adversary the devil, and if you expect God to help you in this battle, you
must both unite in deciding to overcome, to seal your lips against speaking
any words of wrong, even if you have to fall upon your knees and cry aloud,
"Lord, rebuke the adversary of my soul."
If the will of God is fulfilled, the husband and wife will respect each
other and cultivate love and confidence. Anything that would mar the peace
and unity of the family should be firmly repressed, and kindness and love
should be cherished. He who manifests the spirit of tenderness, forbearance,
and love will find that the same spirit will be reflected upon him. Where the
Spirit of God reigns, there will be no talk of unsuitability in the marriage
relation. If Christ indeed is formed within, the hope of glory, there will be
union and love in the home. Christ abiding in the heart of the wife will be at
agreement with Christ abiding in the heart of the husband. They will be
striving together for the mansions Christ has gone to prepare for those who
love Him.
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