1939 Jarvis Magnet

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LEE Bros. Shoes
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With the Compliments of
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TORONTO AND VICINITY

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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
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When the umpire seems to call a lot of “wrong ones”, maybe
it’s your own eyesight that’s at fault. Active young Canadians need
keen eyesight, for studies as well as for sports. It will cost you
nothing to be sure about your eyes, because Simpson’s, for a limited
time, will make thorough examinations for students, without the
usual charge.
Tests show that about one person in four under fifteen years
of age (and about two in five under thirty) need glasses.
T(he new shatterproof “Saf-T-Lens” glasses are ideal for
classroom or playing field, because even if they should be accidentally
broken they cannot shatter. There’s never any danger from splinters.
Jarvis Collegiate students (accompanied
by a parent) will receive
Simpson’s expert eye examination
without charge. For identification,
bring this advertisement to Simpson’s
Modern Optical Department.
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Compliments of the
Canada Bread Co.
Limited
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Manufacturers of
BUTTER-NUT BREAD
"Rich as Butter - Sweet as a Nut”
THE MAGNET 1939
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241 Yonge Street
Open Evenings WA. 4501
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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
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For
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Toronto
69 Bloor Street West
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Note Books, Refills, and all
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We stock:
Examination Reprints of Departmental
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Model Answers to the Examination
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Translations and Keys to Latin,
French, German, Spanish, etc.,
Outlines of History,
Science Outlines and Helps,
Mathematical Keys and Helps,
Teachers’ and Students’ Notes and
Helps on the Prescribed Literature
for 1939,
Also a complete line of Public
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162 BROADVIEW AVE.
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THE MAGNET 1939
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THE
6REENWAT
PRESS
LIMITED
Specialists in Catalogue and Book Work
Printers and Bookbinders
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312-18 ADELAIDE STREET W.
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Volume 20
Number I
THE
MAGNET
TORONTO 1939 CANADA

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THE MAGNET 19 39
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THG mflGn^T STAFF
ADVISORY STAFF
W. S. Ferguson, B.A
Literary
C. W. Booth, B.A.
Miss H. Durie, M.A.
T. J. Wright, M.A.
Photography
W. Moorhouse, B.A.
Art
L. G. McKerracher, B.A., B.Paed.
Business
J. T. Jenkins, B^A., B.Paed.
EDITORIAL STAFF
Editor-in-Chicj
Jimmy Smith
Associate Editors
Sol Littman Paul Hammond Shirley Van Netter Bob McCoy
Norah Holland
Lower School Editors
Alen McCombie Helen Darezac Stan Hendra
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Business Manager
Circulation Manager
A dverUsing Manager
BUSINESS STAFF
Ralph Shilton
Mary McClean
Art Campbell
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Art
Humour
Photography
Exchange
Organizations
A lumni
Girls’ Sports
Boys’ Sports
Poetry
DEPARTMENTAL EDITORS
David Quan
Marion Jenkins
Stew Willmot
Ron. Taylor
Jimmie McBride
Simcoe Gold
Jim Hickling
Margaret McDougall
Ted Sawyer
Margaret Gould

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THE MAGNET 1939
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PRINCIPAL F. H. CLARKG
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Dedication
This Issue of The Magnet is Respectfully Dedicated to
the Principal, Mr. F. H. Clarke
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nORTHUmBCRLAnD
(Respectfully dedicated to Mr. F. H. Clarke,
one of Northumberland’s honoured sons.)
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The county of Northumberland
Has hills that meet the sky;
Upon their crests the forests stand
And leafy banners fly.
The north sees Trent’s clear, silver stream
Through verdant valleys flow;
Upon the south, the waters gleam
Of blue Ontario.
For miles her fertile fields are fair,
With Nature’s blessings spread—
A thousand fruitful orchards bear
Their treasures, gold and red.
Her villages so peaceful lie,
As if in them remained
The quietness of years gone by,
Collected and retained.
Such names as Colborne, Castleton,
Warkworth, and Brighton show
The loneliness of Britain’s sons
Who came here long ago.
They tell of good old British stock,
Of rugged pioneers,
With spirits sturdy as the rock
Which scorns the trying years.
Their sons still plough the rolling field
Where once the forest spread,
Still woo the earth her fruits to yield,
Their homely daily bread.
But some to other fields have gone
To seek Life’s guerdons rare,
And some have golden glory won
Or names of honour bear.
Yet, whether Fame or Fortune smile,
And Life be bright and gay,
Or fickle Fate their feet beguile
Upon a thorny way.
Still in their hearts an echo thrills,
Forever ringing clear,
The call of Home among the hills
That every son must hear
And, hearing, dream of Home again
And all its simple joy—
The stream that ripples down the glen
He followed, as a boy....
Yes, whatsoever he has done,
No tribute quite so grand
As just, “He is a worthy son
Of old Northumberland”.
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THE MAGNET 1939
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TH€ PRinCIPRL'S fT10SRG€
The editor has invited me to write a brief article in the nature of a
valedictory. At first I thought this would be fairly easy to do, but T find
it exceedingly difficult to write a farewell to such a school as Jarvis after so
long an association with it. It is not that there is nothing to say, but rather
that what is to be said is so difficult for me to say. One cannot avoid being
conscious of a “great cloud of witnesses”, and being somewhat overawed by
their august presence in the gallery and. on all sides, wherever one looks.
Thirty-five years ago, I esteemed it a great honour to be invited by
Principal Manley, on behalf of Toronto’s first Board of Education, to become
a member of the staff of old Jarvis. At that time it was my high privilege
to be associated with exceedingly able teachers such as Miss Janie Thomas,
Col. Michell, R. A. Gray, George A. Chase, George E. Shaw, Carl Lehman.
W. A. Jennings, Principal Dr. Embree, John Jeffries, T. J. Ivey, Robert
Wightman, and others.
Four or five years later, when the school was organized which became
Oakwood C. I., I was transferred to its first staff under the principalship of
the late John L. Cox, an able man, who died suddenly at the end of two years,
and was succeeded by the late R, A. Gray, whose services in education at
Oakwood, and for the Province of Ontario at large, were quite outstanding.
After nineteen years at so famous a school as Oakwood, I was nominated
by the late Col. Michell as principal of Bloor C. I., where I spent the next
seven years in association with a very able staff of teachers. Five years later
came the climax in my career when Dr. Goldring did me the very great
honour of nominating me for transfer to the principalship of this distinguished
and venerable institution, where I have worked very hard to fulfil my duties
and have had the hearty co-operation of an excellent staff which is, at least,
the equal of the best in the Province of Ontario.
And now, having completed forty-three years of teaching, thirty-five of
them in Toronto, and twelve as a principal, I am thankful to be relieved of
further responsibility while 1 am still in good health and to hand over this
great school to the guidance of an able and highly esteemed colleague of
many years, who will have the support and co-operation of its staff in his
arduous duties, as I have in the past five years, which is the greatest cause
for gratification in all my experience.
In conclusion, I should like to bid a friendly farewell to all my former
colleagues and to the present pupils of the school, with the assurance of my
continued interest in their future success in the school and in the life of this
great country, in which all of them may play an important part by following
the traditions of the Old Grammar School—founded 1807.
So, after forty years and more of association with the best educators of
my generation, after five years as fourteenth principal of this venerable and
vigorous school, and with pleasant memories of a host of young people who
are now or are destined to be leaders in the development of this great country,
I bid farewell to all with grateful acknowledgments for what their friendship
has meant to me under a kindly Providence, and with my sincerest best wishes
for their future happiness and prosperity.
“Nil decet invita Minerva.”
F. H. CLARKE

JANUARY. HIGH PARK
W. Moochouse, B.A.

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THE MAGNET 1939
CDIlHftIA
The Royal
Visit
JT)OWN the long, winding road of the romantic past, clothed in
the golden mists of glorious tradition, have come our kings
and queens.
They have stood for the power and glory of Britain through
the centuries. Today they stand for democracy in this free and
mighty Empire to which we belong.
In the Middle Ages when a king and queen passed swiftly
through a town borne in their golden carriage, to the music of the
herald’s trumpet, the clatter of prancing steeds, and the rattle of
wheels upon the cobblestones, burghers and artisans, mothers and
shouting children gathered in cheering lines along the royal way.
Now, for the first time in history, our King and Queen will set
foot on Canadian soil and we will line the well-paved streets of this
modern city to cheer our own beloved sovereigns; King George VI
and Queen Elizabeth, as they move by in a gleaming motor car,
bowing and smiling upon loyal subjects whose love and respect for
them is unmixed with base fawning flattery or cringing fear.
Then, as we see these worthy descendants of a great royal line,
these rulers of the greatest of all Empires passing before us, then
should we pray with heart and voice, “God Save Our King and
Queen’’.
On the New
Curriculum
IfT IS NATURAL that there should be reactions both for and
against the new curriculum. It is our object to voice some of the
popular opinions for the purpose of showing our appreciation of the
satisfactory reforms, and with the hope of suggesting some worthwhile
improvement in the unsatisfactory.
The new “Basic French” is looked upon as an improvement by
most of those, who, by repeating a year, have been subject to both
the old and new courses. Using the old French text one studied a
list of words and grammatical constructions, then worked out an
exercise. This resembled our present Latin course. However, the new
course stresses speaking and reading, acquiring the words as we need
them, rather than formal grammar. Most of the instructions given in
class are in French and passages from the book are given in order
to train the pupil’s ear to comprehend the language as it is commonly
spoken. Since this is the manner in which we learned our own
tongue, this perhaps accounts for the preference for the new system.

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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
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II is generally agreed among the students that Latin should not
be replaced by “Business Practice” in first form. If it was the aim
of the pupil to study Business Practice he would attend one of our
High Schools of Commerce and receive a substantial grounding in
that subject. While it is of some advantage to receive an outline of
business technology, it necessitates cramming into four years an
amount of Latin which formerly took five. Since a collegiate stresses
English, which is based on Latin, it would seem more profitable to
study the latter thoroughly.
Most of the second formers are thankful for the opportunity to
review algebra afforded by the new course. This plan includes a wide
variety of mathematical subjects so that a pupil who is forced to
leave school after a year or two has a broader understanding of
mathematics.
Whatever our opinion may be, let us remember that those in
charge are doing their best, so we must not be too critical.
Hail and
Farewell
^nLT"E WELCOME to the staff of Jarvis Collegiate three new-
* * comers. Miss Elliott has come to our French Department
from Stanford Collegiate Institute. Miss Cousens from Western
Technical, is now in charge of Home Economics. Miss Little is
handling the girls’ P.T. during the temporary absence of Miss Stinson.
To Miss Ratz, Miss Hilliard, and Mr. Baker—success to them
in their new spheres. Miss Ratz is in charge of Home Economics
at the College of Education. Miss Hilliard is happily married and
has forsaken school teaching. Mr. Baker is head of the Mathematics
Department of Lawrence Park Collegiate.
Jubilation
TV/JT INERVA rejoices, for Jarvis spirit has soared during the past
year. The rugby and hockey teams were supported marvelously,
Jarvis excelled other schools not only in attendance but in
spirit. Although the Jarvis rugby teams, exclusive of the bantam
squad, compiled no wonderful record the student body was present.
And if it were not for the fact that rugby allows only twelve
men on the playing field, the students would have been on that field
fighting with their hearts for Jarvis. The hockey teams were equally
well supported and this accounts for the fact that their fighting
spirit was always at a maximum to bring victory to our school.
And with rumours of spring rugby practice in the offing, all that
can be said is, “Beware of Jarvis rugby teams and also beware of
those students that support them”.

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THE MAGNET 1939
A H appy
R et u rn
THEMAGNET returns after a lapse of two yea rs. New features
are noticeable thi s year, mainly the addition of the Alumni and
Exchange Sections. Jimmy McBride , Exc hange Editor, is to be
complimented on his unt iring work in thi s field, all we ask is th at
you read the Exchange to appreciate all th at he has do ne . The
Alumni Section, edited by J im Hi ck ling, is also a real highlight beca
use it was a difficult ta sk, req uiring har d work and patience to interview
our Alum ni.
The Sports Section has been treated thoroughly. Peggy Xlc­
D ougall deserves a great deal of credit for her novel breezy way of
writing the girl s' sports. T ed Sawyer has made the most complet e
sports review eve r seen in our Ma gnet.
Our gra te ful th anks to Mr. M oorh ouse for his splendid photo ­
graphic contributions . Note his ca nd id shots taken for your ente r­
tainm en t.
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A ppreciati on
THEEDITOR wishes to exp ress ap preciation to everybody for
the harmonious co-opera tion in producing this-the twentiet h
editio n of The Ma gnet.
Unlimited and sincere thanks to our advisory staff. They have
given us their tim e and work un selfishly. Without such fine suppo rt
behind the students, Th e M agnet's success would be doubtful. On ce
aga in our appreciation to our advisory staff.
Th an ks also to M r. Stro ng of the Adv ertisers ' Supply Engravers,
and M r. Greenway of the Greenway Pr ess, for th eir aid in pr oducing
thi s publicat ion .

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THE MAGNET 1939
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vnGnBonD cowboys
Bill Thomas, 4E
Fresh cool Atlantic breezes were
whistling through my port-hole. Time to
“rise and shine” on this the fifth day at
sea, with only four days to go before the
cliffs of England rose ahead of our bow.
There we were, John Patterson and I, in
the middle of the ocean on our first trip
away from home and serving as sea-going
cattlemen. Cattlemen, believe it or not,
when our only experience with cattle was
the tastiness of a well-cooked roast of beef.
Thirteen adventurers made up the
personal attendants assigned to the mooing
passengers. There was Jock, a big Scot
fresh from driving a bus in Hamilton;
Stan, who cursed the food daily and once
tossed a plateful overboard with dire predictions
as to the fate of the fish who
devoured it; two Varsity students from
Stratford; a Toronto school teacher; two
Americans from the University of Michigan
; and one forlorn soul who was going to
join the Royal Navy.
Three times a day the members of our
little company had to feed and water the
four hundred and fifty head of cattle. Big
bales of hay had to be broken and spread
in front of each animal. There was just one
drawback to the job of watering the cattle.
They had a nasty habit of getting confused
and kicking the water all over us. Some of
those steers had the capacity of camels.
They would drink as many as five pails of
water and then look for an encore. But the
hardest work was hauling the hay from the
hold (how’s that for alliteration, Mr.
Booth?).
Our meals were terrible. We had the
same thing to eat for breakfast, dinner, and
supper. Roast beef, mashed potatoes, and
gravy are swell but not for breakfast and
particularly not for a steady diet. The
cows may have had a balanced diet but
ours wasn’t. I was disgusted with myself
when I found I’d gained four pounds on
that diet.
Ten days after we sailed from Montreal
we landed in Manchester. We bade our
fellow cattlemen goodbye and were left
alone on a strange street wondering what
to do next. The first thing we did do was
to buy some chocolate bars, (Shades of
roast beef and mashed potatoes). Then we
found a big impressive-looking Bobby and
asked him to direct us to a cheap place to
stay. But the police force hadn’t much to
offer; so we asked a taxi-driver. This latter
solved our problem and we obtained a
room “avec un bain” which we proceeded
to use thoroughly. The ring around that

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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
tub was an inch thick when we had finished.
After the clean-up and a close shave we
went to a restaurant and had a big meal.
We didn’t have roast beef.
Next day we got bicycles, different from
Canadian makes in being much lighter and
having three gears. The gears proved to be
a great asset later when climbing hills. We
were in England, Wales, and Scotland for
nearly six weeks and, as all our travelling
was done on bicycles, I think their purchase
was a good investment.
We started from Manchester and passed
through the historic old town of Chester
and on to Northern Wales. Then we
travelled south through the beautiful
Welsh mountains to Hereford. This country
has wonderful scenery with its mountains
and walled-in fields, its lovely seaside
resorts like Rhyl and Llanduduo, and its
quaint little villages with odd names
(imagine a place being named Bettysy-
Coed!). We saw castles towering like grey
mountain crags over the deep Welsh valleys
and recalling the stirring days of Glendower
or the war songs of Dinas Vawr. We
averaged sixty miles a day and slept some
nights in the open. These nights were not
always so pleasant, as lack of blankets
made us feel as if we were spending the
night in Mrs. Thomas’ refrigerator.
From Hereford we continued southward
to Bristol and then headed for Exeter. At
Exeter we met three English lads who were
cycling through to Torquay. They were
very friendly chaps and we were glad to
travel along with them. The eldest, who
was twenty-one, was so amazed at my
combination-lock that I gave it to him. He
had never seen a combination-lock before.
When we reached Torquay we got a place
to stay and then went swimming. Torquay
(pronounced Tor-key) is a glorious seaside
resort and the five of us had a grand time.
From Torquay we followed the southern
coast of England along the so-called
Cornish Riviera and visited Southampton,
where we saw the Queen Mary in dry-dock;
Portsmouth, with grey battleships lying at
anchor, symbol of Britain's power; Gosport,
where hundreds of army planes fill the air
with their fierce music, and on to Brighton.
From Brighton our wandering vehicles
bore us to Croydon airport, the world’s
largest, and thence to London. John knew
a minister in London and this gentleman
was very kind to us. He not only accommodated
us in his home but acted as guide
and friend during our stay in the great
metropolis.
London was the high spot of the trip.
We visited the Tower of London and
gasped before the scintillating wonder of
the crown jewels. We saw the pageant of
England’s great in the ancient corridors of
Westminster Abbey. We saw Buckingham
Palace and its stately scarlet-jacketed
sentries. We stopped open-mouthed before
the lions on Nelson’s Monument in Trafalgar
Square. We journeyed up the
Thames to Greenwich and sat on the line
that marks 0° Longitude. We drove to
Oxford one afternoon and saw its ancient
colleges. Five days in London, five days
I’ll never forget!
We decided now that we’d take a trip to
Paris if it didn’t cost too much. As there
was a cheap excursion over the week-end
we were able to go. The Channel-crossing

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The magnet 1939
Was Pleasant,
ocean—
not a ripple disturbed the on one side anfl fine stores on the other.
on_ mu t0 0llr surprise. This was Edinburgh castle is impressive—a great
01c llme the Channel was not rough. I grey fortress ^owning down from a sheer
guess we were lucky. We found a'hotel cliff upon the Peaceful city.
. a room for 20 francs (that's not much From Edinfinrgh our way lay through
m our money).
the Scottish lake district to Glasgow and
The gaiety of Paris has not been the Exhibition. We were unfortunate in
exaS?crated. It is a feeling that is part of having rain throughout the duration of our
the very air, a feeling you get as soon as visit to Glasgow—maybe it was just a
you step out of the soot-grimed Gare St. Scotch mist but it felt “awfu" wet to us.
Lazarre. We strolled the broad boulevards We left Scotland and travelled through
and the funny narrow side streets and the the beautiful English Lake District. It is
feeling of gay Paris was in all of them. We really breath-taking to cycle along the
were entranced by the sidewalk cafes— winding roads beside the lakes with mountains
all around. No wonder Wordsworth
tables right on the sidewalks where the
Parisians sip their wine, chat, laugh, listen got a kick out of that marvellous scenery.
to the music of the orchestras that are Then on to Blackpool, England’s Coney
everywhere. We sat down in one of these Island, and finally Manchester and our
cafes and astonished the waiter by ordering ship for home.
Coca Cola. Yes, you can get Coca Cola in Altogether we travelled fourteen hundred
Paris.
and twelve miles on our bicycles and were
There was one amusing incident in Paris. very glad to be able to sell them. As we
A fellow selling papers came over to us and got ready to leave we both said, “the
said: "Do you want a New York or English are a very hospitable people and
Chicago paper?” We assured him we England is a grand old country.”
didn't, whereupon he replied—“Okeedoke.” We came back as non-workers and all
Back to England again! We picked up we did was eat and sleep. The canned goods
our bikes and travelled north through the we bought before sailing didn’t last very
Midlands. We saw Bill Shakespeare's long but they tasted like Christmas turkey.
house and Ann Hathaway’s. They looked I recommend a trip like this to anyone
very historical and literary and romantic seeking experience and pleasure at small
but I still prefer Mrs. Thomas's for a expense. Perhaps the next time I sail for
residence. You don’t bump your head in Europe I’ll be taking a gun along with me.
dark stairways anyhow. Then we continued
our journey north as far as Edin­
the shores of England first loomed up on
But I. will never forget the thrill I got when
burgh. Edinburgh is the prettiest city we the horizon and a strange world opened its
saw. Princes Street has beautiful gardens doors to me.

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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
LATA LUATCH
Margaret Gould, 4A
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Hans yawned. The cathedral clock would
strike in a moment ... he yawned again . . .
and Jehan would be angry, and say in his
rough old voice, “Late again! And you
want to be a soldier!” and more than likely
buffet him over the head. Hans rubbed his
ears thoughtfully, as if in anticipation of
the blow. There! The twelve heavy notes
boomed down the wind, muffled by the
snow but not indistinct enough to serve as
an excuse for lateness. Fie had tried that
before, but old Jehan had snorted and said
he had heard it at the other end of the
town. Hans stretched himself. Better late
than never, he had tried to tell Jehan more
than once. Jehan didn’t agree. “A watchman’s
duty is sacred,” he would say, “and
you must hold it so, and by our Lady you
will if I must drag you through the town
myself!”
Hans got up from the floor leisurely,
and flinging a tattered cloak around him
opened the door. The cold struck him like
a gulf of icy water, sharp and piercing. The
wind howled around him as he turned the
corner, pulling at his cloak as if striving
to tear it from him. But to him it was not
a common wind ... it came from the plains
of Russia, over which a victorious army
was marching even now. . . . He hurried
along the deserted street. A late cart passed
with no sign of recognition, and when
its doleful creaking halted all was silent.
The houses were black and still, and
when he thought of those comfortable
burghers in warm beds, huddled securely
behind doors, he swore aloud, then was
suddenly silent.
The market place was before him, white
and shining. The frozen fountain gave
forth no sound, and the jet of water, a
column of ice, seemed to be uplifted in
surprise at its own muteness. The cathedral,
calm and dark, rose up and up until its
white-clad spires seemed to reach the moon.
The moon was like a lantern, thought
Hans, a golden lantern lighting his way. . .
He stopped abruptly. His lantern! He had
left it at the lodge! Now he would be late
and . . . Heaven protect him! . . . Jehan
would surely discharge him as he had lately
threatened to do! In his haste he fell
into a heavy clinging snow-drift. Silently
.. . for he needed his breath for other
purposes ... he damned to endless perdition
the snow which he had so recently
admired, and struggling up ran as quickly
as he could through the abominable clinging
stuff.
In three minutes, by the cathedral clock,
he was again in the square, breathless and
panting. The lantern in his hand cast a
ring of yellow light on the blue-shadowed
snow. .Again he ran until he reached the
corner where his beat began, then gave a
gasp of unbelieving relief. The snow hissed
down on the drifts, the dark had become
more intense, seeming to presage his disgrace
with its silent gloom; but the corner
was deserted.
For the first time in fifteen years Jehan
was late.
Hans walked lightly over the snow.
What a glorious night! And he would say
nothing to Jehan . . . just look smugly
virtuous. Jehan would know what he was
thinking. He looked down the narrow
street, blue and still in the moon light. Far
away he could see the faint glow of Jehan’s
lantern, a dim wavering circle. The cold
was like a taut cord, quivering in the stillness.
Suddenly the cord shivered and
snapped in a hollow clatter of hooves. A
dark mass of horsemen swung around the
curve of the street, snow whirling high
about them.
He saw Jehan stand for a moment in
the street, lantern raised in amazement.
The light went suddenly black, as the
horses swept on into the darkness. Hans
cowered against a wall until the storm of
hooves passed him. When it died away he
raised his head to stare after them.
He saw the last rider, mounted on a
horse as white as the snow beneath him,
pause for a moment at the street head. The
moonlight shone on the silver helmet and

24
THE MAGNET 1939
thick red cloak as he glanced carelessly Hans knelt beside him, and supporting
hack; then shrugging his shoulders, he set him with an arm that trembled with excite-
: spurs to his horse and galloped away. Hans ment, choked the breathless question;
'
gaped after the disappearing rider as he Jehan tried to answer, but gave a slight
ran forward. On the snow lay a dark gasp. Then his head fell back, and the dry
huddled figure, from whose gashed fore- lips barely formed the words, “The
head the slow blood dropped. It was Jehan. Emperor! He has returned from Russia!'
I
nn inTRVieuu with euclid
Bungle
i
“Cheerio, Charon,” quoth I, as I dis- chance to intervene. “Sire,” quoth f, someembarked
on the further shore of the Styx, what less flippantly than I had addressed
“The fare is two drachmas,” rejoined the the ferryman, “I have oft admired your
bearded bargee, “and a trifle for the boat- definition of a point; position without
man,” as he extended a palm in a truly magnitude was it not?” “Verily,” said the
modern manner. Cheerily I handed over great one, “and my phrase was delightfultwo
drachmas and an obol, for I required ly adapted by an earth parent as he viewadditional
service. “Canst direct me to the ed his son’s recent report, which set forth
abode of one, Euclid?” said T. “Yonder he that his offspring stood thirty-fifth in a
stands on the sandy shore with divider and class of thirty-five.”
ungraded straight-edge,” said the ferryman I thought this an auspicious moment to
as he pushed off in response to the halloos change the subject. “Euclid,” said I, someof
Don Lewis, Paul Hammond and Lord what warily, “has Pythagorus never ac-
Macaulay, who. due to the collapse of the cused you of infringement of copyright in
“Pons Asinorum”, were awaiting ferry the matter of your inclusion of his theorem
service from the earth side of the murky in your elements?” “Not so,” quoth he,
shore.
“for, indeed, I did him great service in
As T approached the sage, I noted that I introduced streamlining and air-
Rossen Roueff and Jean Jacques Rousseau conditioning to his ancient vehicle”,
in rapt attention as the great mathematician
demonstrated geometrically that, pher, as he noticed Ernest Birman, shuf-
“Excuse me,” interrupted the philoso-
(x -4- y)2 = x2 + 2xy -f y2, a fact that fling over the sacred sands, “1 must demonhad
escaped their notice, hitherto. Their strate to that youth, that, ‘a straight line is
breathless pause of admiration gave me a the shortest distance between two points’.”
r.\
IX
A
But, as the offender retorted to the effect
that the comment was of a coercive nature
and tended to the restraint of liberty, the
sage proceeded to remark that a straight
line, like an argument or an interview,
could be produced to any length in either
direction.
I departed discomfited, leaving the wise
one, vainly endeavouring, with the aid of
certain small, mottled ivory cubes, to
convince Sammy Lerner, Adolf Hitler and
Benito Mussolini that, “if equals be taken
from unequals the results are unequal, the
greater result being obtained from the
greater unequal”.

JARVIS COLLEGIATE
KflTH

t .
m
26
ments, its busy shipping, was the centre of
life. There, she felt, she could accomplish
something. There, she was sure, she could
write the things that lived within her brain.
So finally she left New Zealand again,
ostensibly to take cello lessons in London.
But the cello was soon sold and Katherine
joined a travelling opera company. At this
time she wrote successfully and began to
have her stories published. She met and
married John Middleton Murry, a publisher,
and collaborated with him in writing
and in the editing of several magazines.
More than those of most writers,
Katherine’s stories were strongly influenced
by her life. She really had a doll's house
just as wonderful as the one she described
in her story, The Doll's House, One of her
sisters still has the “little lamp” but, after
Katherine’s death, the doll’s house was
given away to a home for incurable
children.
But the burning soul of this girl was too
much for her frail body. Long hours of
concentrated effort, accompanied by a diet
of black coffee and endless cigarettes, took
their toll. Katherine Mansfield contracted
tuberculosis and the dread disease brought
her suffering and an early death. She spent
the last three months of her life at
Fontainebleu in France, where she died in
January, 1923, at the age of thirty-three.
She is buried at Avons in France. Her
tombstone is very simple and on it is inscribed—“But
I tell you, my lord fool,
out of this nettle, danger, we pluck the
flower, safety”.
Katherine Mansfield once remarked, “I
think the only way to live as a writer is
to draw upon one's real familiar life . . .
to find the treasure ... to help other people
THE MAGNET 1939
take it to themselves”. Such a treasure she
found in life and shared it with her readers
who have lived with her and known her
deepest feelings.
WHAT TO WRITE?
DIXIE RICHARDS, IE
Oh gosh! What’ll I write about? Lets
see, they said we could write short stories,
articles, plays, jokes, riddles, skits, sketches
and and. . . What the deuce was that other
topic? Hm, tell in your own words a story
you've read. Thai’s it!
Well, do I try writing a short story or
an article, or maybe I’ll do a play. That
sounds like music to my ears. Only, darn
the luck, you can’t write a play until you
have a story.
Now what sort of story is going to catch
the reader’s fancy? Something about
a juicy murder, I’ll bet. I wish all those
murder yarns I’ve read would quit popping
up in my mind. I want something original.
Funny how time flies. Here’s an hour
gone and I still haven’t got an original
idea. Just when you need an idea you
never can think of one. Guess I’ll have to
give up the idea of a short story or a play.
Somebody else has thought of all the ideas.
Well, all the jokes I know I read in The
Magnet, so they’re out. And I never could
guess a riddle, let alone tell one. So I
suppose I’ll have to write an article.
Suppose I write about something I’ve
been doing the past month, or the past
week. In fact why not write about what
I’ve been doing the past hour—ah that’s it!
I’ll write about what to write about for
The Magnet. Call it Throes of Creation or
something. And there we are.
1

,
28
THE MAGNET 1939
fin
inT€RVIGJU
WITH
dr. BmnnG
John Nidd
5A
* ;
i
m*
i
M
m '
■
- ■
At his secretary's “He’ll see you now”,
we entered Dr. Banting’s office like fatalists
prepared for any eventualities. Our first
impressions were of a close-cropped, thickset.
prominently-featured man who tugged
energetically at his cigarette. A few of his
own pictures decorated the wall, along
with one of Pasteur standing at a microscope.
From the office we could get a
glimpse of his lab.
He interrupted our opening apologies
with a brusque, “Take a seat and let’s get
down to business”.
We immediately exchanged glances and
made a mental note, “Refuses to stand on
ceremony”.
“We would like to hear something about
State or preventive medicine,” was our
opening request.
“Which?” he queried.
“State medicine.”
“You’ve come to the wrong man,” he
answered, and began to tell us all about
it anyway. He defined it as the super-
vision, by the State, of the health of the
people under its jurisdiction. He then told
us about Sweden, which from the medical
point of view, is the ideal country. Here
the State takes a small amount from
everybody's pay as a medical insurance and
the doctor does not present his bill to the
patient but to the State. The doctor is insured
a minimum wage. The number of
doctors is regulated by the State and the
Government can tell how many doctors
there will be ten or fifty years hence.
“Diseases such as diphtheria, tuberculosis
and cancer are all looked after by the State
here in Canada,” he explained, “and
diseases such as smallpox and diphtheria
were only stamped out when the Government
directed a campaign against them.
Sasketchewan leads Canada in the adopting
of State medicine.”
“What qualities do you seek in a man
when you are picking one to work for
you?’’ was the next question.
“Well, there are many things—its hard
\
■ ■
r. •

—
JARVIS COLLEGIATE
29
SUSPENSE
lo sav,' lie said, “but if a student gets
ninety or ninety-five in a couple of subjects
and just fair marks in the rest, then that
WALTER NEWEL. 3E
is the man I want. This man is interested I glanced at the clock—five more
in these subjects and has made an effort minutes and then safety. The last halfto
learn about them. He has common sense, hour was that of living-death to me. The
but the man who gets ninety-five in all suspense, the anxiety, were frightening. I
subjects has just a photographic mind. We sat in terror with a slow, sickening feeling
can get all he knows in reference books. in my stomach. It was then that I heard
Don't give me any of your gold medalists. something in the distance. Softly at firs^
Phooy with your ninety-five percenters! ” and then gradually getting louder. Only
he exclaimed, and snapped his fingers in too well I knew those steps. My heart fell
distain. Liftman and I exchanged glances to its deepest depths. I tried to be brave.
and began to recall our marks hopefully. How could I be made to suffer for something
I hadn’t done! But! Oh! this sus­
“Why do so many people turn to research
today?”
pense! Suddenly it stopped, a victim had
“It is because a man can get more acclaim
in five years in that field than as all was quiet. I had not been caught yet,
been secured. A slight scuffle, a roar, then
a doctor in fifty years,” he replied. “There there was still time for escape. But, what?
is also a desire in everyone to add to the A shadow comes across my page. Slowly I
sum total of human knowledge. However,
turn my eyes upward only to see two
there are many men in research who lack
gleaming eyes staring down at me. I tried
common sense and a research man must
to pretend I didn’t notice anything, but a
have common sense, and above all,
hand gripped my shoulder and with a voice
honesty.”
filled with triumph Mr. Wright said,—
“What fields are most fertile for a young
“Newel, where is your homework?”
doctor to specialize in today?” we asked.
“Well, I’m conservative enough to believe
a doctor shouldn’t specialize, but
should get a broad general knowledge of
his work.”
“Now about your paintings . . we
began.
“I thought you wanted to know about
medicine,” he interrupted.
“Well a painting is supposed lo interpet
the soul of the artist. In what way does
yours do this?” we continued.
“I don’t know anything about that,’’ he
said, “but I get a lot of fun out of painting
in my spare time. I haven’t painted
for about two years.”
His paintings are extremely like himself—blunt
and energetic.
“Anything more?” he asked.
“No,” we replied.
Without any further remarks he bounced ^
off his chair and started towards the door
of his lab. That was the last we saw of
Dr. Banting.

30
THE MAGNET 1939
CHIRAC
Margaret Gould, 4A
Chirac was very ill. When the landlady
left him. he lay gasping for breath. It was
his own fault, she had told him before
leaving. He had been preaching militarism
all the day before in the pouring rain, and
the khaki-clad passers-by had listened and
applauded. No one asked why he himself
was not in uniform.
He lay very still and sniffed. He was
sure he smelt sulphur, had smelt it for
hours. Then he looked up. A little black
imp was sitting on the end of the bed twirling
its tail. It grinned at him.
“Well,” it said, “Here I am.”
“I didn’t call you,” grumbled Chirac.
“No? No matter.”
“Who are you?” said Chirac angrily.
“Why, everybody knows me,” and it
grinned again.
“But no,” protested Chirac, “I do not
know you.”
“You will soon,” said the imp and
sniggered behind his hand.
“Stop that!” cried Chirac. “You make
me afraid,” he muttered.
The imp twirled its tail idly, looking at
it modestly the while.
“Why did you come here?” said Chirac,
watching the revolving tail.
“I felt I was needed,” replied the imp.
“When will you leave me in peace?”
The imp opened its eyes very wide.
“When I am no longer wanted,” it said
and burst out laughing.
“But I do not want you,” cried Chirac.
“Yes you do,” said the imp lightly, “only
you don’t know it.”
“Go away,” grumbled Chirac and
hunched himself in the bed.
“Why should I?” the imp looked up at
him suddenly.
“Nobody wants you,” said Chirac excitedly,
“go—go quickly—before anyone
sees you.”
“Don’t you want to know' who I am?"
said the imp gently.
“Yes—yes—then go
The imp hummed a little tune and turned
away.
“Well?”
The imp looked over its shoulder and
nodded.
“Aren’t you going to tell me?”
“Perhaps—yes—on one condition—”
“Well?”
“That you tell the world.”
“Yes—yes—go on.”
The imp bowed politely.
“I am called by some ‘The Shadow of
Wars that Have Been’.”
“But you are so small.”
The imp looked at Chirac reprovingly.
“In comparison to the wars that are to
come, I am not small enough. You ought
to know that. Theoretically I am not in
existence at all. But when you have your
next final war I’ll come and live with you."
Chirac looked at him coldly.
“Now go and tell the world,” said the
imp and smirked.
“Never!” cried Chirac.
“I think you had better,” said the imp.
“You promised. Aren’t you a man of your
word?”
“I’ll go, I’ll go,” cried Chirac, “you little
devil!”
“Exactly,” said the imp and laughed
again.
Chirac picked up an iron book end.
“Are you going?”
“That wouldn’t hurt me,” said the imp,
“but I am going anyway. Thank you for
this pleasant conversation,” and he was
gone.
Only then did the slight odour of sulphur
disappear.
The next week Chirac stood on a corner
preaching peace.
“Mad,” murmured the khaki-clad passers-by,
“And he so young!”

A STREAM THAT HAS A SUMMER
SNOW-HID IN JANUARY

i
32
THE MAGNET 1939
«
••I* -
i
AMBITION
THE BANNERS OF
FORGOTTEN WARS
Above the blue horizon hangs a star;
“Come, seek for me,” its twinkling seeiVi^. TheMxmners of forgotten wars
to say;
And I must rise and follow, though 'tis far,
Nor mourn the flowers I trample on the
way.
Lured ever onward by that spark of gold,
I follow through the world, because I must:
Content if, when my journey's done, I hold
One faintly-shining handful of star-dust.
Marion Jenkins, 5A
NIGHT EXPRESS
Shuffling, shuffling.
Slipping through the night;
Glistening, glistening,
Gleaming cubes of light;
Puffing, puffing,
Passing out of sight.
J. Friedman, S-C.
» A>re dim upon the walls of time;
The spears that lengthened to the stars
Are lying now in icy grime:
The victors’ names are heard no more.
The sites of ancient battles die
Deserted, crimson with their gore,
Silent beneath a frosty sky.
And yet we still must struggle on.
And think our age and wars will be
Tn mind forever—never gone,
But living to Eternity.
But they, like shadows after prime,
Will fade upon the walls of time.
Margaret R. Goui.d, 4A
: --1
S
$
I’VE TRIED
They say The Magnet needs
My work!
Perhaps their tune
Will change when they see
This mad effort.
It’s called free verse—
But gets worse
As it goes on!
T can’t write:
T won’t pretend to.
I’ve told the truth
To pul an end to
This stuff.
That’s enough!
Here it goes—to that box in the hall.
That’s all.
Cynthia McMartin, SA
MARGARET GOULD, 4A
Poetry Editor

i
JARVIS COLLEGIATE
33
ANOTHER DAY
The sun is high, and gropes its way down
through the grayish gloom beneath.
I stir, and wake my senses up to life;
another day has come.
My clothes are clammy, and the air is cool,
I tremble with the cold.
A harsh north-wind whines sullenly about
my ill-clad frozen legs.
THE BLIND BEGGAR
Outside the gales of Thebes, long, long ago,
His hoary head unsheltered from the wind,
There sat a beggar, whom the world called
blind,
His tired face shining with a fervid glow;
And when rich men of Thebes passed, some
would throw
A coin to him, or two, if they were kind.
We think it strange they could not see the
mind
Within the man, and yet, how could they
know?
How could they know what deathless words
were those
The beggar’s scribe then scratched on
battered slates?
How can we blame them if they could not
see
In that frail, weary man with threadbare
clothes.
The aged, blinded beggar at the gates,
Homer, the uncrowned king of poetry.
Marion Jenkins, 5B
DUSK
The evening echoes soften
In the closing hush of day;
The footlights slowly darken
With a parting grand display.
The twilight curtain settles
O’er the flush of fading light.
An act of life is ended
By the jewelled cloak of night.
Joan Cowan,
1C
The trees rise black and naked in the dawn,
and soon the snow will come.
But lest that blue-clad figure in his rounds,
should come upon me here,
I shuffle on my way
to God knows where. Another day has come.
J. Friedman, 5C
PUCK’S LAUGHTER
I have heard Puck’s laughter.
In pine trees, with sweet scent
Pervading all
I heard an understanding voice
With age-old knowledg<
Laughing.
In fields of grain, wind-swept,
I caught the merry sound
Like a clean sea air;
He chuckled—diabolically I thought,
And then was silent.
By a birch tree I sensed his presence.
Then,
A dying, sad-toned little laugh
Of unshed tears,
Which presently became a chime
Like old forgotten bells.
Yes— I have heard Puck’s laughter;
Gleeful at dawn,
And mournfully at sunset.
But I have never heard one word he
uttered—
I cannot understand the Golden Age.
Margaret R. Goued, 4A

34
PROGRESS!
"Voting folks, old folks, all together come!
And get your education by the New
Curric-u-lum.
Oh! Latin and Geometry are slated for the
can,
But they’re substituting Ethics and the
Brotherhood of Man.
Oh! Grammar and Arithmetic are going
for a walk,
But they’re teaching Business Practice and
the watering of Stock.
No more those ancient bogies with their
problems shall appal
When they introduce the latter, to the
profit of us all.
The academic bill of fare, I see, in future,
will
Eliminate the condiment and sugar-coat
the pill,
And vocal music enters in. the purpose,
I opine,
Acquiring of a surer pitch to sing “Sweet
Adeline”.
The vigour of our discipline, the ruler plied
behind,
Are yielding to the Golden Rule, the
broadening of mind.
Oh! self-determination is the order of the
day,
And Duty’s call is answered by the siren
voice of Play.
Old folks, young folks, all together come!
And get your education by the New
Curric-u-lum.
THE MAGNET 1939
WINTER NIGHT
The wind is caught in the sycamore tree,
And she wails:
The lightning scratches the lowering sky
With her nails.
The wind is caught in a glistening
Twining net:
The web she weaves with the leaves
Is shining wet.
Beatrice Daniels. 1-C.
SILENT SNOW
I, the lover of silence.
Have given my heart to the snow;
Flake upon still flake sifting,
Flake upon soft flake drifting,
Petals from flowers that blow,
In a garden somewhere beyond the ken
Of the farthest vision of mortal men.
I, the lover of beauty,
Have plighted faith to the snow;
Flake upon fair flake blowing,
Flake upon white flake growing.
Into this grace I know,
Hiding all that is sere and bare
With a mantle only immortals wear.
Joan Cowan, 1-C.
THE WIND IS CAUGHT
The moon,
A pale still lantern,
Fretted with stars
And cloaked about by night,
Whitens the snow
And lights the shadowed trees.
Frail moonbeams fall upon the fettered
stillness,
Silent and sliding dimly to the ground.
Margaret R. Gould, 4A

JARVIS COLLEGIATE
(
m
LULLABY TO A FIRST
FORMER
Hesh, little fust-formah,
Don’ yo’ cry!
Yo’ll be a fif’-formah,
Bye-un-bye!
Yes, little honey-chile,
All too quick,
Comes dat ol’ debbilish
Pass Matric.
Den comes de wuslest year
Dat dar am;
Yo’ cain’t do nuffin ’cept
Cram an’ cram.
Ef yo’ repoht am bad
Back it come.
Yo’ makes yo’ pappy mad,
Yo’s so dumb.
“Yo’ bettah git to wuk!”
Pappy say;
Yo’ calkerlates yo’ will
Long ’bout May.
Den, when June come, yo’ find
Yo’ too late—
Out ub nine subjects, yo’
Flunks in eight.
Hesh, little fust-formah,
Don’ yo’ cry!
Yo’ll be a fif’-formah,
Bye-un-bye!
35
“AN EVENING OF STUDY”
“Oh, but this bench is hard,” she said,
So to an easy-chair she sped.
She put her books upon her knees,
And did her homework there in ease.
“History, Geometry, Latin and French,
Now there’s the door-bell, who can it be?
Will T ever get finished?” she said.
I’ll peek through the curtain and see if it’s
‘he’,
’Twas just a pedlar with something new.
So back to her easy-chair she flew.
She began to nod but jumped like a flash,
When the telephone rang with a mighty
blast.
“Why certainly, dear, I’d love to go,”
She said in a voice that was sweet and low.
“My wasn’t it swell for him to call,
And ask me to go to the Highlanders’ Ball.
I wonder which gown I should wear this
time,”
She said, as the clock began to chime.
“Oh dear it is getting late,” she spoke,
“I must go to bed for my beauties’ sake.
I can do my homework at school sometime.”
So she closed her books with a mighty bang.
Margaret Wright, 4A
I DON'T . . . (?)
Pupil’s Parody of Robert E. Deane
My teachers tell me not to talk—
I don’t;
Nor keep on staring at the clock—
I don’t.
They make it clear to me that I
Should never, ever hum or sigh,
Or even yawn, or close mv eye—
I don’t.
To walk the halls in pairs is bad—
I don’t.
And naughty girls make teachers mad—
I don’t.
I do not fuss, I do not fool;
I never break the “Golden Rule”.
You wouldn’t think that I like school—
I don’t.
B. Goldenthal, 4C, and
N. Kuchar, 3C

ip vfln jennins
“Maria Bungle”
THE MAGNET 1939
I
\
;
!
“Do you get it nowV*
The speaker, his voice hoarse with
emotion, gazed down at the sea of blank
face upturned to him. He searched every
individual face. Did not one betray a slight
glimmer of intelligence? No, not one.
With a sigh he turned to the black-board,
and again tried to prove to the skeptical
class that three divided by zero is not zero.
No one seemed at all convinced. Even he
began to wonder if perhaps, after all, he
might be wrong.
Affairs were still in this gloomy state
when the noon-bell rang. The class trooped
out, but Mr. Jenkins had no heart for
lunch. That very morning the third form
boys had groaned at his pun on the
“'Venetian blind7' and “blind Venetian”, and
now this!
“Fresh air,” he muttered to himself, as
he looked out at the balmy spring weather,
“fresh air’s what I need. I'll go for a good
long drive somewhere.”
His heart filled with this resolution, he
marched downstairs, ignoring even the
“silly asses” who occasionally whistle in the
sacred halls. When Mr. Barnes inquired if
he were going out to lunch, he muttered
something about “the Greasy Spoon” and
walked on. He noticed he was still clutching
his ruler, but he decided to take it
along, in case of an emergency.
As soon as the powerful car began to
purr, a gentle glow stole over him. Now,
with the wheel in his hands, he was his
own man again. Thoughts of the coming
holidays were already beginning to soothe
him as he turned north on Yonge Street.
He had been driving for a long time,
when suddenly he came upon an unfamiliar
highway. It stretched to the west,
broad and wide, and was bordered by
grassy banks. With sudden decision, Mr.
Jenkins swung his car about, and rolled
along this unknown road.
Gradually a deep weariness stole over
him. He yawned, but suddenly his eyes
brightened.
“They’ll never miss me if I take one
If
ms
iU/DOOUS.
afternoon off,” he thought. “I’ll just park
the car and take a nap under one of these
trees.”
Acting upon this decision, he pulled the
car to a stop, automatically seized his
ruler, got out, and stretched full length on
a sun-warmed bank under a broad shady
tree.
“Ho hum!” he yawned,
nap’ll just fix me up right.”
“This little
He stretched again and sleep flowed over
him. His last conscious thoughts were:
“Must get back for problems’ class. If
I don’t . .
Then he knew no more.
It must have been about two-thirty when
Mr. Jenkins stirred, rubbed his eyes,
coughed, muttered “Go ’way!” and then,
as memory returned, sat up. He brushed
some dry grass, a few ants, and a spiderweb
off his coat.
“Curious about that spider-web,” he
mused, “when I’ve only been sleeping for
about two hours.”
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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
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He looked down at his suit. It was unusually
wrinkled, and seemed faded.
P'urthermore, the soles of his shoes, which
had protruded from under the tree, were
damp, although the clear sky bore no signs
of any recent shower.
“Why, what’s this?” he exclaimed
suddenly. Beside him lay a piece of wormeaten,
weatherworn wood, about a yard
long. Mr. Jenkins gingerly picked it up,
and flung it away.
After flexing his stiff muscles, rubbing
his back, and wiping off his glasses, he
started for his car. When he reached the
road, he looked up and down. No car was
in sight. Near the side of the road lay a
few scraps of corroded iron, and what
looked like an axle. That was all.
“These misguided morons that take to
stealing cars,” muttered Mr. Jenkins, “I’ll
take the trolley back to the city and report
this.”
After several weary miles of walking, Mr.
Jenkins boarded a street-car. It was a new
type, streamlined and air-conditioned.
When Mr. Jenkins sank into a softlycushioned
seat, the low hum of the wheels
made him drowsy again, and once more he
slept.
He was awakened by the familiar sound
of the conductor calling “Wellesley 1 Change
here for Rosedale bus line.” He clambered
to the ground and trudged along Wellesley
to the mighty collegiate.
At the corner of Jarvis and Wellesley he
stopped, looked, took a few hesitating steps
forward, stopped again and looked again.
What in the world had happened?
The school was still there, but not the
same school he had left that noon. Instead
of the stone steps leading to the dignified
front entrance, escalators and revolving
doors spread before Mr. Jenkins’ pained
and horrified gaze. Gathering his courage,
he placed his feet on the lowest step of the
escalator. He was whisked up to a revolving
door and propelled through it.
“Let me help you up, sir,” said an officious
voice, and Mr. Jenkins found himself
gazing up at a young man, dressed in a
red, white and blue uniform, ornamented
with myriads of buttons. This competent
creature picked him up, dusted him off, and
asked, “What can I do for you, sir?”
“Take me to the principal’s office,”
sputtered Mr. Jenkins angrily. %
“You mean the rector, sir. Certainly.
Right this way.”
As he was preparing to leave the rotunda,
Mr. Jenkins’ eye chanced to light upon a
statue standing in the corner. It depicted
a middle-aged man, of a build best described
as “slightly stout”. He wore glasses,
and held a ruler in his hand. On the
pedestal below was inscribed “Gone, but
not forgotten”.
Mr. Jenkins found his voice.
“Who’s that?” he quavered.
“Oh, him?” replied the attendant.
That’s Mr. Jenkins. Like Enoch and Elijah,
he was translated.”
Broken in spirit, Mr. Jenkins proceeded
to the rector’s office.
Behind the rector’s desk sat a man of
about sixty years of age, with a shock of
grey hair and a small grey moustache.
There was something vaguely familiar
about him.
“Jim!” the rector suddenly shouted.
“How did you get here?”
Memory returned to Mr. Jenkins.
“Gerry!” he shouted. “Gerry, my lad! Are
you principal? What’s happened around
here?”
“Well,” replied Mr. Allen. “Times
change, and in 1969 ...”
“1969,” said Mr. Jenkins slowly. “So
that’s it . . .”
“That’s what?” queried Mr. Allen.
“Come on and I’ll show you around the
old place. We have a new 100 foot swimming-pool.
Best in the city, in fact. And
there’s our miniature model of the universe.
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Indispensable in teaching geography, you
know . ..”
“No, no,” said Mr. Jenkins sadly. “I
couldn’t stand to see the old place so
changed. But tell me, Gerry, what’s
happened to everybody?”
“It’s a long, sad story,” said Mr. Allen.
“Mr. Wright was first to go.”
“What happened to him?”
“The wanderlust got him. He had a
chance to go on a scientific expedition to
Mars. He went, and . . .”
“And . . .?”
“It never came back.”
“Go on, tell me about the rest,”
“Well, Mr. Ferguson and Mr. Wilkie
are writing a book on “Scottish Customs”.
They’ve already completed “From Scalp to
Sporran” and “After Bagpipes—What?”
Mr. Sheppard, Mr. Cook, and Mr. Barnes
went to Arabia on an archeological expedition.
Mr. Muir recently discovered the
world’s most effective explosive. He’s buried
in Mount Pleasant Cemetery. Mr. Holmes
is carrying on his work. Mr. Booth, Mr.
Moorhouse and Mr. McKerracher are in
the Senate. Teacher’s are getting justice
now. Mr. Steinhauer and Mr. Brokenshire
are in the diplomatic service—their command
of languages, you know. Mr. Nelson
is teaching aeronautics, and Mr. Bowman
and Mr. Hill are teaching parachute jumping.
Mr. Blatchford is over in Egypt
measuring the pyramids. He’s sure the last
THE MAGNET 1939
calculations were wrong. Mr. Allin and
Mr. Dyce finally discovered what electricity
is.”
“What is it?” asked Mr. Jenkins.
“Don’t ask me.—it’s worse than Einstein’s
theory. The ladies on the staff are
all teaching in the Toronto Girls’ Seminary.
Finest school for girls in the world, they
say.”
“Everything’s changed,” sighed Mr.
Jenkins. “In fact, Gerry, I’ve changed my
mind.. I think I’ll go up and have a look at
my old room. No, don’t come with me, I
can find the way.”
And slowly the tired figure of the old
man climbed the stairs.
There was his old room, but there was a
new name on the door. Mr. Jenkins looked
at his watch. It was exactly 3:30.
“What a coincidence,” he murmured.
“Just time for problems’ class.”
He entered, and peered wistfully around
the empty room. New geometry instruments
were stacked in the corners. On the
back wall hung a picture of our hero himself,
next to one of Euclid.
Suddenly Mr. Jenkins paused. The room
was not empty. In a desk near the front
sat a long, lean, middle-aged man. Mr.
Jenkins rubbed his eyes and cleared his
throat.
“Nidd, you rascal, haven’t you got that
thirteenth problem yet?”
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THE MAGNET 1939
HGflDS UP!
Phil Shackleton. 3E
This is a summary of the advice offered
to skiers by a noted “Skiologist”. He
specializes in describing that revolving
motion known as turning. I shall try to
draw a mental picture of a few of these
intricate revolutions which may be used at
the skier’s own risk.
The first turn is known as the “Pancake”,
and resembles its namesake in every detail.
This is carried out at the bottom of the
hill as are all others here described. The
abdomen is projected forward and deposited,
with a resounding thud and alarming
impact, on good old terra firma. There are
no strict rules as to what to do with one’s
skis in this case.
Another vital titbit is known as the
“Maple Syrup”. As the name suggests, it
usually follows the “Pancake”. The body,
after finding itself on the ground, toboggans
along the surface. For further details
try it yourself.
The “Upside Down Cake” is a common,
if not popular performance with all classes,
experienced or not. This contortion usually
follows a dive. The feet and skis are
projected into mid-air while the head plays
ostrich and buries itself in the snow.
After the skier has recovered from these
elementary figures, he is ready to attempt
the more difficult proposition known as the
“Pineapple Cris-Cross”. In this operation
the skis are crossed in front of you and
then . . . ? There are no hard and fast
rules concerning the reposing of the remainder
of the person, but I am sure that
it will not remain in an upright position.
This may be conducted very nicely as a
duet. Brotherly love finds its way into this
performance, as the two victims are forced
to share one “Cris-Cross” between them.
From my own experience and from observing
fellow experts, I can safely say that
this is one of the most exotic, but more
often the most agonizing experience that a
skier could wish for. If, after having
mastered this masterpiece, you find that
your hair has turned white, just brush the
snow out. (Continued on page 115.)
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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
41
SKETCH Of A
SHRinninG DflncfiR
John MacLean, 2F
Can you remember your first dance on
a dance floor? Then you will know what
I am talking about. It was my first experience
at a public dance. It occurred on
a Friday afternoon at this very Collegiate.
I was standing at the back of the auditorium
and watching the funny way in
which some of the Jarvis jitterbugs were
hopping around. Then my sister suddenly
appeared on the scene from nowhere and
asked me for a dance. She was very
anxious to get me out on the floor with the
rest of the crowd, but I wished differently.
She coaxed me for several minutes before
I finally gave in. For some funny reason I
started to get nervous, but there was no
need for this as I had danced with her at
home.
Well, I started, and for the first part I
did well until I got out of step. I could
feel my face going red and it seemed as
if everyone was watching me and I could
only look at the floor. She was dancing all
right, I suppose, but I seemed to be
stumbling, and the more I stumbled, the
more nervous I became. I was saying to
myself, “Can I finish the dance? Will I
reach the other side of the floor?” and
many other questions. Then someone
tapped me on the should and said, “May
I cut in?” Naturally I said, “Certainly”.
There I was, out in the middle of the floor
and I had to get back to my corner. I made
my way slowly across the floor. As I walked
I thought my legs would give out. I
blurted, “Hello”, to a couple of friends,
and its a wonder I could speak at all. I
finally reached the corner and collapsed
in a chair.
That was a good start, but I didn’t dance
any more that day. Nor did I dance for a
month or so afterward. I am not much
better now, but I don’t shake half so much.
If you watch some dancers going around
the floor you may think they are nervous
as I was. They may be “jitterbugs”. But
who knows?
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Grief
Hope
Relief
Nope
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THE MAGNET 1939
i;
He DISCOVER® R LRUJ
James Jenkins, 4C
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A shrill cry broke the stillness of the
warm Mediterranean afternoon, Staid
citizens of Syracuse turned from streetcorner
conversations and gasped as the
figure of a man, fresh from his bath, burst
on their astonished gaze. This eccentric
was bawling, “Eureka (I have found it)”
and was, quite evidently, entirely oblivious
of the deficiency of his attire. Timoleon,
the envoy from Athens, turning to the
quickly-forming throng inquired, “Who is
this madman?” and Bryaxastes, the benevolent,
throwing a robe around the excited
apparition, replied, “This is no madman,
but Archimedes, a worker of mathematics,
who, only last month, launched the King’s
great ship single-handed with some curious
device he had contrived”. “Hail, Aged
One!” quoth Timoleon to the gasping and
newly-clothed philosopher, “What means
this sudden outburst? What is this thing
thou hast found?” “Friend,” returned the
sage between puffs, “note that I labour
under commission of my cousin Hieron,
King of Syracuse. But recently he hath entrusted
his crown to a goldsmith for repairs
and fears that this fellow may have replaced
some of its royal metal for a base
one. Wherefore he hath commanded me to
determine whether this worker be knave or
honest craftsman. The problem was no easy
one and for several moons I pondered it.
But today, as I sat in my bath and contemplated
the difficulties before me, I was
struck by the fact that there was a buoyancy
in my body so that it seemed lighter
than when I am immersed in air. By
Euclid, I cried, here is a way. This body of
mine doth displace a volume of water and
I’ll warrant ’tis equal to its weight. A king’s
crown would also displace a volume of
water, the volume differing with the purity
of the metal. So, Athenian, I ran through
the streets for very rapture at my success.”
So the man who was born in 287 B.C.
first gave an account of the thoughts that
have kept his name alive till 1930 A.D.
A law bears his name, a law that has been
a guide for scientists through the many
centuries that separate that sunny day in
Syracuse from today. Pupils have groaned
over it—“A body when immersed . . .” But
the world has found it useful.
But let’s leave the mathematical statistics
for more learned tomes than our Magnet
and let’s talk about Archimedes himself.
Maybe we’d better call him “Old Archi”
and really get acquainted with him, for
he seems to be rather well worth knowing.
Archi lived in Syracuse, but seems to
have liked a touch of travel as well. He
lived for a while in Egypt and taught in
the Museum (University) at Alexandria.
No doubt a sail on the Mediterranean or
some Egyptian Coca-Cola would please
him, but for the most part Old Archi
seems to have stuck pretty well to his
books. He invented a spiral pump before
the days of patents and law suits, and got
rather well acquainted with our old friend
“Pi”.
But Egypt wearied Old Archi and he
decided to go home. Syracuse looked pretty
good to him and he settled down comfortably
among his old friends to finish his
days in peace. He solved a few problems,
probably gave a talk or two to the local
Chamber of Commerce and the Syracuse
Scientific Society, and generally enjoyed
himself.
Then came the War!
The war in question was the Second
Punic War, one of the few which the world
has fully paid for. At the time it was considered
a pretty vital affair, but of course
everybody has forgotten it ever happened.
There have been so many wars—and this
was a rather minor-league skirmish alongside
of Alexander’s, Caesar’s, and Napoleon’s
wars and the wars that Hitler talks
about.
Anyway, the Romans besieged Syracuse,
which was rather embarrassing to Archi
and his friends. Archi was no warrior but
he had a brain. He started to invent at a
great rate and these inventions of his proved
rather drastic to the Romans. He built
(Continued, on page 44.)
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rock-throwing machines that wrecked some
Roman ships: he built a system of lenses
whereby he used sunlight to set other ships
on fire; he devised pulleys so that unwary
vessels which ventured too close to
Syracuse’s sea-built walls might be seized,
dragged upwards, smashed, and dropped to
sink beneath the waves. The above will indicate
that Old Archi was leaving no stone
unturned and was, pretty generally, a
nuisance to the Roman soldiery.
There were too many Romans for Old
Archi to take care of them all and Syracuse
had to capitulate. The year 212 B.C. saw
Rome the conqueror of Syracuse.
Old Archi went right along with his
puzzles and mathematical problems. It was
a bit different in Syracuse under the rule
of Rome. The streets were cluttered with
soldiers who were forever saluting and
prominent Romans were forever laying
corner-stones and mouthing platitudes
about their Empire. But all this had very
little effect on Old Archi. He used to sit
by a sand-box and solve geometric deductions.
He’d draw the figure in the sand,
gaze at it. mark equal angles, and eventually
solve it. One day a Roman soldier caught
him at this. The soldiers had been told not
to harm Old Archi because it was felt that
he might produce some inventions which
would be of help to Rome. But Old Archi
had got up to those complicated diagrams
in Book V. He was about ready for an
Ontario Pass Malric exam in geometry.
The diagram got the simple-minded fellow.
He was sure this was treasonous. So he
slew the sage.
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my favourite summeR resort
Joyce Rice, IE
It’s not the sort of place you think about
when summer resorts are mentioned. The
only dance hall is the barn, where a good
old-fashioned barn-dance is held each
month, and we all dance till the roof nearly
falls in (it did once and all the hay fell
on top of us). You don’t sit in your
spacious front garden and gossip about
passers-by, you just stand at the gate and
yell across the valley, and that way you
can’t talk too much about your neighbours
and maybe, all in all, that is better
manners. My summer resort isn’t situated
at the seashore where the waves lash at
your back door at night and keep you
awake, but by the quiet old swimming pool
whose ripples sing you a lullaby. You wear
no. riding-habit and there’s no fancy riding
academy, but a pair of overalls is fine for
a gallop on Napoleon, the mule. We don’t
have Benny Goodman or Toscanini, but we
have got Sam who leads us in raising our
voices to the quiet mountains around and
the stars above.
That’s my summer resort.
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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
45
fl VISIT TO A RADIO STUDIO
Eileen Hunt, 4A
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When I came home from school on
Thursday, January 5th, I found two tickets
to the Pond’s Programme awaiting me.
Although I have listened to “Ask Another”
for several years, I had never been presenL
at a broadcast before, and so could hardly
wait for the next evening.
Nine forty-five Friday evening found my
girl friend and myself inside the C.F.R.B.
studio, looking at everything with wideopen
eyes. The studio itself was a great
deal smaller than T had imagined, only
holding about two hundred people. At the
front of the room was an empty stage.
Microphones were everywhere, even on the
ceiling and on the floor.
At five to ten, the members of the
orchestra came in, and to my surprise I
saw two of Toronto’s well-known Happy
Gang—Bob Farnon and Bert Pearl. Bob
Farnon, better known as Gramma’s Boy,
is quite tall, and has dark hair and eyes.
He plays trumpet in Wally Armour’s
orchestra and from the grins he was giving
his fellow players, I should think he possesses
a grand personality.
Bert Pearl, “five foot two of sunshine”,
plays the piano. He is quite short and full
of life, and I thought Hugh Bartlett’s
phrase quite applicable.
They were followed by Rhoda Howe,
Howard Lindsay, and George. Rhoda Howe
is of medium build, and has short dark
hair. She seemed to have a pleasant personality
and smiled at everyone in the audience.
At one minute to ten, a red light flashed
the words “Stand By” and a nervous silence
prevailed. Everyone’s eyes were on the
light, and as “On the Air” flashed, Wally
Armour raised his baton, and the programme
had begun.
After about fifteen minutes of questions,
Howard Linsay asked who spoke the
quotation, “God Bless Us Everyone” and
whence it came. At the familar signal,
“Hands up”, I raised mine before I really
realized what I was doing. W'hen I heard
him say the girl in the black hat, I put
my hand down, for I was wearing a brown
one. But several people turned and looked
at me, and someone said to stand up. Bewildered
and very frightened, I looked for
something to hang on to. Rhoda Howe
brought her portable microphone to where
I was standing, and I answered, “Tiny
Tim, in a Christmas Carol”. Fortunately
this was correct, and she then took my
name. By this time my nervousness had
disappeared, and I really enjoyed the
conversation that followed with Rhoda
Howe. Then George brought me my Pond’s
prize and I sat down.
For the remainder of the programme I
was in a cold sweat and yet thrilled to
know I had been on the air. I intend to go
again to the “Ask Another” programme,
and perhaps win another prize.
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THE MAGNET 1939
TH€ GOOD SflmflRITnn
Margaret Somers, 4A
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He was old and cross. Everyone was
afraid of Mr. Croseby. Perhaps it was the
way he looked at you, like a cat—skeptically
and coldly. Perhaps because he had
kept Timothy for so many years, that he
and the cat actually were beginning to look
alike.
The day was over and it had been a
good one. The little antique store had not
been busy, but one wealthy lady whose
hobby was vases, had purchased a rare
Egyptian one for two hundred dollars. It
was not really rare and it was not Egyptian,
but it was weather-beaten and cracked. Mr.
Croseby had bought it with a truck-load of
junk for twenty-five dollars. Timothy had
sat on the counter all the while, motionless
and knowing, his long, slender, black legs
stiff, his ears straight. He had known, and
he was pleased.
Now, they were back in the little room
behind the shop. It smelt musty, and had
a low ceiling hung with cob-webs. It looked
like an extension of the store, for it contained
almost every kind of antique and
heirloom. Mr. Croseby was a collector at
heart and a miser,
Mr. Croseby was in comparatively good
spirits as he put the chicken soup over the
red coals and stirred it anxiously.
“Want some liver for supper, Tim?”
Timothy said a silent “yes”.
Mr. Croseby lived on the fat of the land.
It was a raw night. The wind was high
and a blizzard beat against the grimy
window, but Timothy and his master were
warm and contented.
There was a knock at the shop door—a
most unusual occurrence at this hour. The
antique-dealer grumbled and cursed a few
times as he shuffled through the dark store.
On the step stood a small boy. He was
painfully thin and tattered.
“Sir,” he said, “may I come in?”
That was all. Mr. Croseby was amazed
at the impudence of the child.
“No-no.” he stammered, and banged
the creaking door after Timothy had slipped
out into the night.
“Confound the little scamp!
muttered.
The child’s face was still clear before
him. It was peaked and wan, but not
frightened as all children’s faces became
when they looked at him. This little fellow
looked brave and confident, as though he
had expected to be let in.
It was several hours later, when Mr.
Croseby was preparing for bed, that he
heard a scratch at the door and opened it
for Timothy. Tim walked boldly in, and
after him, a sickly, thin, bestraggled, orange
cat. Mr. Croseby opened the door and said
“shod”, but Tim looked annoyed. He led
the orange cat over to his untouched liver
dinner which the orange cat devoured with
zeal. What had happened to Timothy? He
did not look at his master in the familiar
way. He was different tonight.
For once in Mr. Croseby’s life, he felt
alone. The little room suddenly seemed insufferably
stuffy and something made the
shop-keeper go to the door and open it.
The small chap was sitting huddled against
the doorway. He looked up, his face
shining. Mr. Croseby stretched out his
hand and the lad entered. Neither spoke.
The boy ate his fill of the best the miserly
old man had.
Mr. Croseby does not cheat his customers
any more, nor is anyone afraid of him. No
one knew exactly when the change began,
nor did they know why, one night, ten long
years ago, the little man had decided to
enlarge his family.
Even Mr. Croseby did not know; only
Jim’s mother, for she had told her boy
before she died, “Everyone in the world is
good, Jim. You must never be afraid, for
there is nothing to fear.”
But where had Timothy ever heard the
story of the Good Samaritan?
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JARVIS COLLEGIATE 47
mfiGn€TS of yesTCRDfiy
R. McCoy, 3D
The Magnet staff wishes to express its
gratitude to Miss Ellen Davis, a studentteacher
who is known to several Jarvis
classes this year and who very kindly
brought us the first four copies of The
Magnet.
It was published in five volumes in the
year 1905 and sold for five cents per copy.
Few students would recognize it—a small
booklet of about a dozen pages, with a
dark brown cover. A school magazine
always makes us think of the school it
represents, and this one especially, as it
comes from our own school. Jarvis Collegiate
at this time was on Jarvis Street,
just below Carlton, and was much smaller
than the present building. Before this, the
Collegiate or Grammar School, as it was
known, had been in three different locations.
It began in 1807 as a little stone
Grammar School on Yonge Street near
George. Students became so numerous,
however, that classes had to be held in a
remodelled barn at King and Yonge Streets.
At the end of the war of 1812, times became
better and the number of students
increased so rapidly that a new school was
built in 1816. The whole block bounded
by Jarvis, Richmond, Church and Adelaide
Streets was used. The building constructed
here, was known for years as The Blue
School because of its colour. All went well
until 1864 when the school was moved
again, not because of poor accommodation,
but merely because the city was moving
north. The new building was almost on the
site of the present-day Normal School. This
site was given up after six years and the
school was moved to its present location
at the time of the publishing of the first
Magnet.
The Magnet at this time contained very
few articles and no fiction! A great deal
of space was devoted to a report of the
achievements of the school organizations.
Jarvis had a smart cadet corps, a baseball
team, and a lacrosse team. Lacrosse was
considered an up-and-coming game by most
people in the early twentieth century, and
was expected to surpass all others.
The rest of The Magnet was devoted to
form-reports and a column known as
“Notes and Comment”. The form-reports,
from each of the ten forms, were very
small, each about three or four lines. A
certain type of pun seemed to be the rage
then and every form-report had at least
two of them. These two were taken from
lC’s form report: “Wonder where Oakland
Rolls to?” and “What did Ellis Reid?”
The form representative for form 3A in
1905, was the father of our friend, Miss
Davis. The fact that he preserved his first
copies of The Magnet so carefully would
indicate how much his old school meant to
him.
Some of the great men of today went
to Jarvis at that time, as this extract from
The Magnet shows:
“We had an excellent programme on
February the third. It commenced with a
piano solo by Ernest McMillan, of form
1C. McMillan is one of the youngest boys
in the school and his playing was certainly
marvelous for a boy of his age.”
And that young Jarvis student of the
year 1905, is now Sir Ernest McMillan!
Who knows? Perhaps there is another
Sir Ernest McMillan in Jarvis at present
and thirty or forty years from now he will
be proud of his Alma Mater. Let us all do
our best to promote the good name of our
school, so that we may indeed be proud to
say that we attended Jarvis.

48
THE MAGNET 1939
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Jimmie McBride, Editor
The Magnet Staff has examined with gratulations to the editor of the clever
great interest the publications received column, “Log of the Good Ship”,
from other schools during the past few Eastwood Gazette — Eastwood High
months. It has been not only an enjoyable School.
occupation, that of reviewing the work of The Echoes — Peterborough Collegiate
students from different schools, but one and Vocational School, Peterborough, Ont.
which has provided us with many helpful Your cover is original and refreshing, but
suggestions. We will not list here innumer- w^y not allow more space to your few but
able reasons why exchanges are of great ^ne photographs?
importance to the progress of a school Thc Endeavour — Dauphin Collegiate,
journal, but will let the column speak for Dauphin, Man. This magazine has much
high-class material. We suggest locating the
As we go to press many school maga- literary material near the front and inzines,
especially those of Toronto schools, creasing the size of the magazine,
have not yet been printed, however, below Thc Hermes — Humberside Collegiate.
are comments upon those which have been Your splendid art and photography add
received and a list of those being forward- greatly to an interesting literary section,
ed to us immediately upon their public- Congratulations to your advertising staff
ation.
for their fine work.
Thc Argosy Weekly — Mount Allison Lux Glcbana—Glebe Collegiate, Ottawa,
University, Sackville, N.B. Such columns Ont. This publication needs only one
as “Newsy Notes”, “The Ferret”, and change to perfect it—the loose leaf bind-
“Lulu and Freddie” add greatly to a very ing is attractive but gives very poor
interesting and humorous weekly.
service. The alumni section is the most
The Auditorium—Owen Sound Collegiate
and Vocational School, Owen Sound, Northland Echo—North Bay
complete we have seen.
Collegiate,
Ont. The quality of your stories, articles, North Bay. The photographic and literary
and school news would be much more im- sections are outstanding in your magazine,
pressive if the printing were not so small. An impressive cover greatly enhances the
Many clever and original ideas greatly annual,
improve your magazine.
Norvoc — Northern Vocational School,
The Bugle — Crescent Heights High Toronto. A first-rate magazine in all de-
School, Calgary, Alberta. We found The partments, but with so many ex-Jarvisites
Bugle is somewhat monotonous to read due doing their bit up at Northern why
to an overemphasis on form news. Con- shouldn’t it be?
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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
Purple ami Gold—Gordon Bell High
School, Winnipeg, Man. The competition
held for literary works certainly brought
some excellent results. The scattered advertisements,
however, tend to weaken the
general appearance of the magazine.
The Times—Kingston Collegiate and
Vocational School, Kingston. The cover of
your magazine could be improved. The
Times school news is done in a rather
hackneyed manner.
The Tower—Catham School, Bristol,
Eng. We did not find this annual very interesting—perhaps
it is because we are not
accustomed to this type of year book.
The Twig — University of Toronto
Schools. The Twig deserves all the praise
and credit it has received.
Verdun High School Annual—Verdun
High School, Montreal, Que. The poets and
the language section are well done, but
otherwise the annual can be improved.
Fo.v Lycci—Central Collegiate, Hamilton.
Without exception you have the largest and
best humour section among our exchanges.
The heavy type headings serve their
purpose of introducing well-organized departments.
Vulcan—Central Technical School, Toronto.
We would appreciate your publication
more if it were printed on more suitable
paper.
The Magazine—Adelaide High School,
Adelaide, Australia.
The Greenock High School Magazine—
Greenock, Scotland.
School News—Royal Belfast Academical
Institute, Belfast, Ireland.
Red and Grey — Canadian Academy,
Kobe, Japan.
Blue and Gold—Mount Humon School,
Darjeeling, India.
Queen's Quire—Queen’s College, Queenstown,
South Africa.
In addition to these we will receive all
the magazines published by Toronto Secondary
Schools, with numerous ones from
different Colleges of the University.
The magazines mentioned are in the
library. We feel that Magnet readers would
find them very interesting.
HERE IS SOME ALIEN
HUMOUR
49
“Go to father!” she said when I asked her
to wed.
And she knew that I knew that her father
was dead,
And she knew that I knew what a life he
had led,
And she knew that I knew what she meant
when she said
“Go to father!”
—Vox Lycci
* *
A smart man is one who hasn’t let a
woman pin anything on him since he was
a baby.
—Lux Glebana
* * *
“Say, what time is it by your watch?”
“Quarter to.”
“Quarter to what?”
“Dunno—times got so bad had to lay
off one of the hands.”
—Argosy Weekly
♦ * *
Mrs.—“What shall I do? The baby just
swallowed your cigarette lighter.”
Mr.—“That’s all right. I can use
matches.”
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THE MAGNET 1939
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In this section we have attempted to
show you, the student, what you can do
when you leave the sheltered halls of
Jarvis, and have to face the problems of
life.
Our aim has been to find at least one,
in almost every major profession, who, by
dint of hard work, constancy of purpose,
and preparedness to grasp opportunities as
they occurred, has added to his name the
letters of the best degree of all . . . success.
Your editor wishes to thank all those
who so generously gave pleasurable interviews
to my assistant and myself. All
treated us with the greatest courtesy, and
held at the school. Among the members of
that organization it is interesting to note
the appearance of such names as Miss
Helen St. John, Miss Katherine St. John,
and Miss Honora Cochrane.
“Hello Mr. Hickling,” were the words
with which Mr. Robertson of the Ontario
Motor League greeted me. Needless to say,
I thrust out my chest, and felt quite proud
of the unaccustomed salutation.
Mr. Robertson, as you may or may not
know, was the first editor of the Jarvis
Magnet. In fact it was he who suggested
the name. It is also interesting to note
that in those days the boys on the staff
showed the kindest consideration for our 0f the paper were paid. At the end of the
lack of experience. All our interviews were
of extreme interest, and I shall endeavour
to epitomize them for you by giving you
few highlights each.
In business many prominent people are
Jarvis graduates. Among these are W. C.
McNaughl, Holt Gurney, W. G. Robertson,
Colonel H. H. Alley, Miss Mary Dallie
and Gilbert W. Robertson.
Miss Mary Dallie is, in my opinion, one
person who is truly a success. She has
not amassed a huge fortune; but she seems
to have found her particular niche in this
world of business. She literally revels in
her work, which itself is very enthralling.
Miss Daly is in the advertising department
of the Robert Simpson Company. Whenever
“youse gals” see and read some attractive
fashion advertisement you can be
quite sure that Miss Daly was responsible
for it.
While attending Jarvis, Miss Dallie was
President of the Y.W.C.A., which was then
SIR ERNEST . . . .
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first year the editor and Mr. W. C. Mc-
Naught. his assistant, divided between
them the year’s earnings. Mr. Robertson
still has the shiny smooth dime that was
his share, or fifty per cent, of the year’s
profit.
There have been many successful doctors
who attended Jarvis, including Dr. Helen
MacMurchy, Dr. Florence McConney, Dr.
Kathleen Bartley, Dr. Omand Solandt,
Dr. Alan Brown, Dr. F. J. Harris and Dr.
Bernard Willinsky. Out of this number we
obtained interviews with Dr. Florence Mc­
Conney and Dr. Alan Brown.
Sometime when you have five minutes
to spare open practically any medical
journal and read something about Dr.
Alan Brown. You will be a fast reader,
if in that short time, you are able to read
past the letters that follow his name, each
signifying some special degree which he
has obtained.
While at Jarvis the Doctor was known
as “Brownie”. He was captain of the
rugby team, and a lieutenant in the cadet
corps. He recalls especially a zero in
algebra, and a subsequent lecture that
boys like him could never be a success in
a world such as this.
Timidly I rapped on the door beside
which, on a highly polished brass plaque,
were engraved the words. Dr. Florence
McConney, M.D. I noticed by my dollar
special that I was slightly over one hour
late. To my surprise when the door was
opened, 1 was not staring into the angry
face of a business-like doctor, who does
not like appointments not kept promptly,
but into the smiling face of one who, I
shortly learned, was Dr. Florence herself.
The Doctor recalls most at Jarvis the
thrill of the rugby games, the oratorical
contests (at which she won most of the
prizes), and the tennis tournaments. She
is now the head of the Department of
Medicine at Women’s College Hospital,
and contends that there is no profession
that can equal the thrill of making the sick
well again.
In the field of education we find many
Jarvis graduates. Some of these are—
51
Inspector Jennings, Miss Janie Thomas,
Mr. Joseph Gill, Professor Alfred Baker,
Professor F. H. Sykes, Miss Helen St.
John, Miss Katherine St. John, Miss
Honora Cochrane, Miss Frances M. Stinson,
and Mr. David Steinhauer (these last
five may sound vaguely familiar to you).
We were fortunate in obtaining interviews
with Miss Janie Thomas and Inspector
Jennings.
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MAJOR BERT WEMP
Inspector Jennings can recall Jarvis both
as a student and a teacher. You chemistry
students may be interested to know that
it was he who wrote the Chemistry Manual.
Inspector Jennings finds his present work
very interesting; and also counsels that
students should tackle the job in hand,
make a success of it, and the future will
take care of itself.
The Inspector was honoured by his old
school by being made a member of the
Jarvis Scholarship Board.
Everyone at Jarvis knows of Miss Janie
Thomas. She is indeed one of our most
honoured graduates. Miss Thomas also
looks back on forty-two successful years
as a teacher at dear old Jarvis. Although
she is no longer at the school, she is keenly
interested in all our activities, and
always delighted to see and talk to Jarvis
students. Jarvis has no friend more loyal.
Jarvis has always been noted for its
musical talent. Among those who have
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THE MAGNET 1939
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gone ahead and made it a life’s work are
such names as: Sir Ernest MacMillan,
Miss J, Creighton, Mr. Mannie Roth, Mr.
Tsadore Sherman, Mr. Jack Kash, Mr.
Albert Proctor, Mr. Harry Kondaks, Mr.
Frank E. Blatchford, and Miss Jean
Roden,
In a tastefully designed office at the
Toronto Conservatory of Music I met Sir
Ernest MacMillan, the conductor of the
Toronto Symphony Orchestra. It is interesting
to note the excerpt from The
Magnet of 1905 (see page 47).
You can see that while at school he was
preparing himself for his brilliant future.
My host explained that the things he remembers
most about Jarvis were Mr.
Clarke’s French lessons and that grand old
lady, Miss Janie Thomas.
In the ministry many Jarvis boys have
succeeded. We find such well known
ministers as: Rev. H, R. Hunt, Rev. Mr.
Barnes, Rev. F. J, Steen, Rev. Francis
Pooley, Rev. Heber Wilkinson, and Right
Rev. Mr. Dewdney.
Reverend Harold R. Hunt is the pastor
of St. John’s Anglican Church. In his final
C. H. J. SNIDER
year at Jarvis he edited The Magnet. That
was the edition of 1924. Rev. Mr. Hunt
attended both the old and the new Jarvis,
and says the thing he remembers most is
the famous parade up Jarvis Street from
the old school to take formal possession of
the present Jarvis.
The field of journalism has attracted no
small number of Jarvis graduates. Some of
the better known of these are Mr, C. H.
J. Snider, associate editor of The Evening
Telegram; Mr. J. V. McAree, editor of the
famous fourth column of the Globe and
Mail; Mr. Dennison, author of Brothers
in Arms (remember the concert?), and
Mr. Hector Charlesworth, former editor of
Saturday Night.
Mr. C. H. J. Snider modestly denies any
great success in the world of journalism,
but he has made his mark as associate
editor of The Evening Telegram.
He treasures the prizes which he won at
his graduation much more now than he did
at the time. He attributes his success partly
to one master, who had the remarkable
ability of making boys work. But it was
not all work for him. He recalls too, the
penalties imposed when, just because it
was against the rules to do so, he would
climb the fence into the botanical gardens.
But above all, he remembers Jarvis for the
fine friendships he formed there.
In public life Jarvis can lay claim to
many prominent men such as Hon, George
Henry, a former Premier of our fair
province; Hon. Wm. Finlayson, a former
provincial cabinet member; Major Bert
Wemp, a former mayor of good old Toronto,
and Sir Henry Drayton.
Mr. Bert Wemp has achieved no small
success since he sallied forth from dear old
Jarvis. His achievements are such as being
mayor of a city of some 800,000 people
(which is no one horse town).
He remembers most vividly the ordeal of
writing the final exams. The assembly room
was 104° in the shade. In his own words,
“I took one look at that Greek paper and
wanted to go home!”
Another Jarvis alumnus who has distinguished
himself in the journalistic world
(Continued, on page 115.)

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THIRST SONG
Adopted from The Canadian Boat Song
53
Shrilly as rings the 11.5 bell,
We rush through the halls and scatter
pell-mell;
Soon as a teacher by one fountain we spy,
After slight confusion we pass on by.
Run sisters run, the time goes fast, .
No fountain is near and till noon we must
last.
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Why should we yet our hopes give up?
There’s three more floors to get a sup
Of life’s sustaining H20;
We’ll get one yet if we’re not too slow.
Run, sisters, run to all four floors,
We must get a drink and they’re closing
the doors.
But each one found her efforts in vain,
For guarding each fountain were teachers
again.
And none of them would hear our prayers,
And grant us cool water to lighten our
cares.
Run, sisters, run to the chemistry room,
We’ll have to drink acids though they be
our doom.
Elvera Bricker, 3B
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THE STRUGGLE
HELEN READ, 3A
He stands poised on his square of
ground before the silent crowd. Every agile
muscle of his young body is strained and
taut. Clutched in one of his great hands
is a queer-shaped stick; while grasped firmly
between the long sinewy fingers of the
other is the limp figure of a bird.
Every one of the vast throng swallows
hard, but not one dares utter a sound. Some
hope, some dare not hope, that this is to
be the end of a long and heart-rending
struggle.
But look! He draws back his stick; he
lets the bird fall: he strikes it with a sickening
crack! Sickening indeed to some, for
it lands on the service line, his opponent
swings wide, and the young man is presented
with the yearly badminton cup.
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Rommce of thg CHin«£ LflnGunG^
Beatrice Thom. 3B
Every language has a romance of its
own. Whether it be Latin, Spanish, French
or English, if we trace it back to its origin
we will find that each has a colourful background
of gradual development. So with
the Chinese language.
China has always placed her scholars
and literature on a high plane. She regards
literature as the very backbone of her
civilization. This reverence for scholastic
endeavours has taken the form of a popular
superstition, that no paper bearing writing
should be used with disrespect nor thrown
about, but should be collected and burned
at schools or temples. Some of her most
precious editions of literature have been
lost however, during times of war. The
soldiers, entirely ignorant of such arts,
committed many great works to a general
conflagration. Fortunately, the writing went
on and the gradual development of the
characters themselves is worth following.
Five thousand years before Christ was
born, the Chinese people made their first,
attempts at writing. In the beginning,
notches, crudely carved on bamboo, the
tree of a thousand uses, served to record
their daily activities. Then they found that
cord was easier to work with, for they were
able to lay out the string in any form or
design that they wished. Hence the notches
and bamboo were dispensed with. Still
later, they discovered the art of drawing
pictures to depict what they wished, and
for this purpose they tied feathers together
to form a brush and they drew on linen or
bamboo paper. Yet this solution was not
entirely satisfactory, for pictures, sometimes
badly drawn, caused confusion.
Nevertheless this method was used until
the time of the Ruler Yao, in the year
2356 B.C. It chanced that a government
official named Tong Git was out for a stroll
one day. During the course of his leisurely
walk, he noticed the footprints of some
birds and animals on the sand. The variety
of these imprints inspired him and he went
directly home to apply it to his writing.
From his observations he formed definite
strokes for each character in his writing,
and thus a system for the Chinese language
was originated.
Since that time, the words have been improved
and increased. They are strictly
monosyllabic and, though independent of
the spoken language at one time, the preferred
writing nowadays contains only
what can be orally expressed also. Although
there are several spoken dialects in China,
the written language is universal. There
are innumerable characters, but a person
possessing a 1,000 word vocabulary is considered
above the average, while anyone
with a knowledge of 5,000 words is regarded
as a very learned person indeed. Today,
new China commands a vocabulary within
the hundreds only. Anyone who is familiar
with 1,000 advanced characters at the
present time is considered well educated.
As the Chinese language is very concise,
this amount can express a great deal.
Actually, many of the Chinese characters
were lost when Emperor Toon Gee burned
all books and papers bearing writing about
213 B.C. He was afraid when his subjects
began learning the language that they
would become more powerful than he and
so seize his throne. He not only burned
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all forms of writing and literature but he
also ordered the execution of all scholars.
It seemed that the existence of the Chinese
written language was doomed, but fortunately,
the Emperor overlooked a blind
man, who had been a scholar, and who,
through hard studying, had become blind.
This man, wonder of wonders, was able to
repeat a whole book on astronomy from
memory after the books were burned and
this book is still in existence today, thanks
to him.
Thus, by a mere thread, Tong Git’s
original system was preserved. There still
was a difficulty, however, which lay in the
similarity of sound in a great number of
words when read aloud. Necessity then,
forced the Chinese to add a sign called a
radical to distinguish these words by changing
the tone in pronunciation slightly. For
example, we have the word meaning “package”
and used as a root. If we add a
radical “hand” to this, it changes the
meaning to “carry” or if we add a “foot”
it would mean “run”. Examples such as
these are endless, but this serves to give an
idea of how the problem of homonyms was
solved by the Chinese.
The written language of China is much
harder than the spoken language. There is
only the tone and pronunciation to contend
with in the spoken, but, in the written,
every character must be memorized, for
there are no alphabets nor phonetic sounds
to aid the writer. Many alert and progressive
scholars of China have attempted to
work out a set of alphabets, but so far,
there is no accepted standard. Yes, one
can learn to speak Chinese easily enough,
but trying to learn the writing of it is, as
the English say, “a horse of a different
colour”.
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new yeRR’s in cmm
Isabel Struthers. 3C
THE MAGNET 1939
Will the dragon swallow the sun? That
is what it tries to do at the end of the
celebration of the Chinese New Year—
but that is the end of the story; so I had
better start at the beginning.
Preparations begin many days in advance.
Roads are crowded with farmers
bringing produce to market and the city
streets filled with shoppers buying what
they will require for the next two weeks
of holiday celebrations. During this time
even the poor people prepare, using their
scanty savings. They will on this occasion
buy a little meat, something which rarely
appears in their diet. You may see the
husband, baby in one arm, the piece of
meat in the other, coming home from
market. Behind him trudges his wife, on
her tiny bound feet, carrying a basket. In
this probably are vegetables, red paper to
make new mottos for the front door, incense
sticks, paper flowers, firecrackers. I
remember our cook at this time bringing
home on one arm a dozen live chickens,
hanging by their feet, and on the other
arm the basket of vegetables, cabbages,
carrots, celery, beets, turnips.
In the millions of kitchens throughout
China all is bustle as the day of the great
feast approaches. An important duty of
the housewife is to place rice and sugar
before the kitchen god, so that on New
Year’s eve, when his paper picture is torn
from the wall and burned, and he ascends
to heaven, he may take a good report of
that household. As the night comes on, the
noise begins. These are firecrackers and skyrockets
which are set off in all parts of
the city and light up the dark sky. The
night wears on and the noise increases,
continuing until daylight.
New Year’s day dawns on a happy
world. The family opens the boxes which
have been closed for months and take out
the best clothes. Certain customs are observed.
The younger members of the
family kowtow to the older members three
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times. They then go out and visit the relatives,
kowtowing also to them. Thus the
day is spent, visiting, feasting and sending
off firecrackers. Several days pass in a
similar way, the visiting extending to relatives
in nearby villages. To reach these,
they hitch up a variegated selection of
animals, horses, mules, oxen, to the farm
cart. The women and children climb
aboard, up to ten or fifteen in number, and
off they go at two miles an hour. This is
fast enough for the roads they have to ride
over!
Large crowds visit the various temples,
Buddhist, Taoist (Dowist), Confucian, to
worship. On the fifteenth day of the New
Year, celebrations are brought to a close
by elaborate displays. Every house in all
the towns and villages hangs out its coloured
lantern. Crowds throng the streets to
seen the lanterns and enjoy the fireworks.
At Hsun Hsien (Swin Shien) there are
two holy hills on which are built many
temples. They are visited by hundreds of
thousands of people every New Year.
Many tablets are presented to these
temples for benefits received from previous
worshippers. One temple is built around a
Buddha eighty feet high, cut out of stone.
Another interesting god is one that is lying
down. The Chinese believe that when the
Yellow River reaches Hsun Hsien this
stone god will rise. The river formerly was
thirty miles away, but last year it changed
its course until it is now a hundred miles
(Continued on page 121.)

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TH€ JARVIS DAIAC6
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This year Jarvis can boast of a school
dance that was a school dance in every
sense of the word. Soft lights, sweet music
and a canopy of a thousand balloons transformed
the auditorium into a festive world.
The aud. was crowded with approximately
two hundred couples, who were loud in
their praises of the really superlative music
by the Modernaires.
But the girls—ah, the girls! The only
comment we can make is to quote a fifth
form laddie who says, quote: “Now how
did they all get so beautiful all of a sudden?”
Mr. and Mrs. Clarke, Mr. and Mrs.
Barnes and Miss Nesbitt received graciously,
and the ladies wore corsages sent to
them by the pupils of the school.
The committee in charge of the dance
was composed of three boys and three
girls: Betty Bell, Jean Sutherland, Peg.
McDougall, Jim Hickling, Jim Pickard,
and Bob Moore.
A huge dance card and a thermometer
indicated intermissions, spot dances, elimiation
dances, lemon dances and many other
specialties. The prizes for these dances
were lovely corsages for the ladies and
gardenia boutonnieres for the gentlemen.
COMPLIMENTS
Miss Little and Miss Sears, literally and
pictorially, the belles of the ball . . a great
big compliment to Mr. McKerracher on
his Lambeth Walk . . . We hope this dance
will be an annual affair at the school. It
gives pupils and teachers an opportunity
to meet on a common ground . . . the most
sincere compliment ever written to Mr.
Oldfield for his immeasurable help in preparing
for the dance.
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VOX TCflCHgRORUm
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For years and years, pupils of Jarvis
have quaked and trembled while teachers
“fired” questions at them. But, as the old
proverbs say, “Even the worm wall turn”,
and “Every dog has its day”. Now it’s the
pupils who are asking questions, and the
teachers of Jams who have laid bare the
secrets of their hearts.
The “third degree” consisted of twelve
questions:
(1) Who is your favourite movie actor?
(2) Who is your favourite movie actress?
(3) What is your favourite comic strip?
(4) Do you prefer swing, sweet, or classical
music?
(5) What is your favourite song?
(6) Do you think boys or girls are
cleverer as a whole?
(7) What is your hobby?
(8) What did you intend to be when you
were in public school?
(9) What is your favourite flower?
(10) Who is your favourite character in
fiction?
(a) male
(b) female
(11) What is your favourite radio program?
(12) Which is your favourite of the individual
forms in Jarvis?
As the replies rushed in, the following
results appeared:
Question (1).
Those ancient rivals. Donald Duck and
Mickey Mouse, tied for first place. Mr.
Wright and Mr. Cook were two of Donald's
staunchest adherents, while Mr. Muir and
Mr. McKerracher maintained that Mickey
was unbeatable. Ferdinand, “Dopey” and
Porky Pig were hard on their heels, supported
by Miss McRoberts, Miss Nesbitt,
and Mr. Hill. Mr. Staples favoured Nelson
Eddy, while Mr. Brokenshire sponsored
“Walrus Bleery”. Miss Cosens preferred
“Charlie McCarthy”.
Question (2).
Jeanette MacDonald was acclaimed
“Queen of the Silver Screen” edging out
Minnie Mouse by a slight margin. Miss
Little, Mr. McKerracher, Mr. Staples, Mr.
Dyce and Mr. Jenkins stood up for
Jeanette, while Mr. Muir, Mr. Hill and
Mr. Wright held out for Minnie. Mr.
Booth and Mr. Allen supported Myrna
Loy. Mr. Cook’s classical tendencies led
him to vote for Mae West.
Question (3).
A landslide for Lil Abner! Miss St.
John, Mr. Blatchford, Mr. Ferguson, and
Mr. Booth marshalled beneath his standard.
Mr. Jenkins and Mr. Sheppard had the
temerity to vote for “Little Orphan Annie”.
Miss Cosens favoured “Donald Duck”, and
Mr. Dyce and Mr. Muir, “Popeye”. Mr.
Cook suggested Paul Peel’s “After the
Bath”. Why, Mr. Cook!
Question (4).
“Sweet” was decidedly the favourite,
with classical second and swing third. The
last was heroically supported by Miss St.
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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
Question (5).
A majority of the teachers selected “How
I hate to get up in the morning”, as their
theme song. Its strong supporters were
Miss Elliot, Miss Nesbitt and Miss Cosens.
Mr. Ferguson and Mr. Wright admired
“La Donna e Mobile”. Miss Little’s
favourite was “The Girl Friend of the
Whirling Dervish”. Mr. McKerracher cast
his vote for “Sweet Adeline” and Mr.
Clarke for “Annie Laurie”.
Question (6).
The teachers preferred not to answer
this. Maybe they were just being diplomatic,
but no decision on this question was
reached so . . . !
Question (7).
Outstanding hobbies were “dunking”
(Mr. Hill), “marbles” (Mr. Cook), “marking
papers” (Miss McRoberts) and “Chinese
Checkers” (Miss Sears). The fishing
enthusiasts were Mr. Ferguson, Mr. Staples
and Mr. Nelson. Miss St. John, Mr.
Blatchford and Mr. Jenkins clung to “terra
firma” and preferred gardening.
Question (8).
At last those secret ambitions are disclosed!
When in public school, Mr. Barnes
yearned to be a hunter; Mr. McKerracher,
a fireman; Mr. Ferguson, a locomotive engineer;
Mr. Brokenshire, a sailor; Mr.
Clarke, a doctor. Mr. Hill and Mr. Allen
hoped to be lawyers, and Mr. Blatchford,
a millionaire. Miss Elliot wanted to be an
architect, and Miss Little, a missionary to
Africa. The secret ambition of Mr. Cook
was to be “older”, and of Mr. Muir, to be
“bigger and better”. Miss McRobert’s
59
heart was set on the career of a lion-tamer,
while Mr. Jenkins picked that of a pirate.
Question (9).
The rose outstripped all competitors.
Miss Cosens voted for “Toximodendron”
alias “poison ivy”. Miss McCamus sponsored
the “four o’clock”. That vigorous
gentleman, Mr. Staples, admired the
modest pansy, and Mr. Booth, the shy
violet. Mr. Jenkins preferred the daisy
(because daisies don’t tell), while Mr.
Cook favoured the healthy goldenrod.
Question (10) (a).
The plot thickens! Miss Nesbitt acclaims
“Friday” (don’t we all); Miss
McRobert, “Barkus”; Mr. Blatchford,
“Jack-the-Giant-Killer” and Mr. Ferguson,
“Long John Silver”. Miss Little and Mr.
Wright took up the cudgel for “Ferdinand
the Bull”.
(b) Mr. Blatchford reluctantly admits
to a fondness for “Snow White”. Miss
Nesbitt favours “Old Mother Hubbard”
and Miss Little “Little Eva”. Mr. Staples
chooses “Evangeline”, and Mr. Hill,
“Cleopatra” (tch! tch!). Mr. Cook’s
classical tendencies again inspire him. This
time he selects “Dido”.
Question (11).
Chase and Sanborn swept the polls!
Buck McCarthy rides again! Amos and
Andy also received great support.
Question (12).
The same reluctance shown. So yuh
won’t talk, huh? Mr. Cook favours “perform”.
We, however, agree with the
teacher who cast her vote for “six feet two
and one hundred and eighty pounds”.
* * *
The teachers were very sporting about
this, and we think they’re a great gang,—
even though we still like Robert Taylor.
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61
th€ mnoRi nnD me pnneHfl
Denise Taylor, 4A
In a late summer afternoon of the year
1835, the slowly sinking sun shed its
burnished light on a little New Zealand
homestead. In this small house a happy
pioneer wife went cheerfully about her
household tasks. With the exception of her
two-months7 old baby, she was the only
white person in a radius of ten miles, for
her husband had been away all day on a
fishing trip.
The peaceful atmosphere surrounding
this little home gave no indication of the
terrifying experience which was to befall
the young wife. The quiet of the bush was
broken only by the evening song of the
birds and the soft lapping of the waves on
the sandy shore.
Within the house everything was spotless,
from the checkered cloth on the table
to the neatly-swept hearth. The fire glowed
red and the gleaming copper kettle sang
cheerily. Hearing a sound outside the
window and thinking it was her husband
returning, she glanced up, then to her
horror she saw framed in the window the
head of a Maori! She knew his mission
could not be a peaceful one because of the
war paint on his face and the tui feather
in his hair. The Maori, knowing that she
was alone, must have come with the intention
of plundering the household. The
blood seemed to freeze in her veins and
her first thought was to seize her baby
and hide, but she bravely fought down this
impulse and forcing a smile to her face,
she threw open the door and said, in the
Maori tongue, “Welcome! How kind of
you to come and see my new baby!” Taking
the baby from the cradle she placed it in
his arms.
The look of sheer amazement that spread
over his face as he looked from the smiling
face of the woman to the tiny baby in his
arms, slowly changed to a smile. She led
him into the house, bade him be seated,
and prepared and gave him food. After he
had eaten, he went peacefully away.
The next day he came again bearing
gifts of fruit and dried fish, and a piece
of beautiful greenstone for the little Pakeha.
Thus a woman’s wit and her knowledge
that all Maoris love children, turned what
might have been a terrible tragedy into a
lifelong friendship, and never again was
the peace of this homestead disturbed by
Maori invaders.
HIGH SCHOOL COITCRCnCC
Ophelia Teghtsoonian, 5B
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This year, the Y.W.C.A. introduced a
new event in their programme by including
a High School Girls’ Conference. Girls
representing more than ten Toronto secondary
schools, mostly in fourth or fifth
forms, attended the conference which began
Friday evening, February 24th, and lasted
through Saturday afternoon and evening.
The main object of the conference was
to educate and guide high school girls in
the vocation in which they are most interested.
On Friday evening we had the choice
of listening to talks on social science,
nursing, food, and photography, and on
Saturday afternoon we could choose two of
the following subjects: library work, teaching,
hairdressing, saleswork, journalism,
medicine, lab. technician work and dramatics.
(Continued on page 109.)
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MAgnEt 1939
ODE TO 1A
Roy Padd-oil’s pOPq, y with the fair sex-
Paul Dunn is a little thing but really very Helen Dudntcrzenh Ayar-paint
clever, ' John Diiintr

JARVIS COLLEGIATE 65
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Leo and Hunter struggle with a baffling
piece of music.
Neill is carefully adjusting his cravat.
Mr. Bowman is selecting absentees with
the kindly help of TC.
Joan Cowan and B. Daniels are quietly discussing
the latest gossip.
Marg. Haig is returning from a visit to IB.
Lucille D. is doing a rough paint job in a
hurry.
Stella DuB. is admiring the scenery out the
window.
Lenora G. is caressing her hair into an upward
sweep.
Ruth H. is preparing some of her original
and clever answers for Mr. Wright.
Things We Could Do Without:
Mad. Keely’s whispering.
Joan Cowan’s oratorical efforts.
Marg. Haig’s nail polish.
Ruth Holmes bright answers.
Hunter sleeping in class.
Chapnick asking Carson questions.
Jardine being late.
Who's Who in 1C:
Lukyn—the scientist.
Leo—the musician.
Hunter—the sleeping beauty(?).
Jardine—the aviator.
Jones—the mathematician.
Oldershaw—the philosopher.
J. Sprung—Parlez vous Francais.
Marg. Haig—general knowledge.
Joan Cowan—the orator.
Lucille Donaldson—make-up artist.
ID
We wonder what Prebble eats during
many Geography classes.
Why do MacDonell and Sampson stay
away many a Wednesday afternoon?
Ask Mr. Wilkie if Trussler will ever
make a good carpenter.
How does Smith obtain such high French
marks?
We wonder where Sutton got that cute
little curl above his forehead?
Jokes:
Little girl: “Mama, where are the
Indians?”
Mother: “There aren’t any Indians here
Janie.”
Janie: “Then why are all the men in the
front row scalped?”
Mr. Blotts, famous political speaker:
“Owing to circumstances, over which I have
no control (namely my wife) I will not be
able to attend the meeting.”
Poems:
A pretty girl, a crowded car,
“Please take my seat” and there you
are.
A crowded car, a woman plain,
She stands, and there you are again.
Algy saw the bear and the bear saw Algy,
The bear was bulgy—the bulge was Algy.
“STUFF’N NONSENSE”
Wonder if C. McCartney got around to
rubbing goose grease on his head. We’re
quite sure it wouldn’t hurt his vocabulary.
B. Murry’s laugh sounds to us like a fat
lady trying to reach high C. She almost
gets there (he does).
The blot on the paper, the cloud in the
horizon, the verb in the Latin, and the
worst pest in the room is B. McC------ .
The boy in the third seat in the middle
row sees all and hears nothing.
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THE MAGNET 1939
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IE
IE, Mr. Hill's form, shows a decided
improvement over the form IE of previous
years.
Exams are all over again. Many exclamations
of delight and many long drawn
sighs of shattered hopes arose when the
mathematics papers were discovered on
Mr. Hill's desk Wednesday. These were
but a preliminary to the blast met by IE
the following Friday. In a meek tone the
lecture started—“IE’s per cent, has dropped
to 53 per cent.” then followed an explosive
torrent that had the class trembling.
Literature papers deserve no comment
except to wonder where Miss Sigmund's
other 12 marks went to. French! that
delightful subject. Ominous glares were
darted at certain members of the class long
before the papers were returned—we are
not certain but we’ll venture a guess the
class average to be well below 50%.
IE Wonders'.
1. Where Elia Belli gets her gum.
2. If Hoover has ever come into room
22 at other than 9 A.M.
3. When Dixie Richard will stop growing.
4. When Kriss Murphy will answer
(a x a) correctly.
5. Where Yewman learned to croon.
6. When Miss Sigmund will smile.
7. Why S. Prue never stops talking.
8. Where Roper gets all the personality.
9. Where Sommers gets those awful
puns.
10. Where P. Rowly got a certain hockey
player’s phone number.
IF FANCIES
Wonders of IF:
—Dick Walker’s sneeze.
—Jaffray Wilkin’s badminton.
—Ralph Yearwood’s laugh.
—Ann Thouvenot’s lipstick.
—Leonard Tyrrell’s gesticulations.
—Joe Wilkin’s dramatic power.
—Miss Wadham’s spelling (it’s good).
Do You Remember:
—When Stratas got his ears boxed by Mr.
Staples?
—Miss Elliot calling Jack Speck, Jack
Speak?

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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
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—When John Sherbourne got to school
three days in a row without being late or
absent?
—On Thursday, January 12, 1939, no one
was late or absent in I F.
—The day when Edith Wright understood
(?) fractions?
We Arc Waiting For:
—Tonking to get a mathematics problem.
—Bill Venn to answer a question of his
own accord.
—Miss Elliot to pronounce Stratas’ name
correctly.
—William Woodrow Taylor to stop doing
favours for teacher.
—Wilcox to stop making a noise.
Famous Sayings of IF Teachers:
Mr. Bowman—Stand up at the back of the
room, Wilcox. You too Stratas.
Mr. Booth—You had better be good or
else Santa Claus won’t visit you next
Christmas.
Mr. Wilkie—Why can’t you understand
those simple things?
Mr. Hill—Two minutes to go! Be out before
the bell rings.
Mr. Staples—Say it again! Say it again!
Say it again!
Miss Elliot—Sit around in your seat, Yearwood,
and stop talking.
Mr. Dyce—I’m afraid I haven’t got this
class thinking yet.
Mr. Nelson—Read your last note Vasileff.
Mr. McKerracher—A little bit of red
would help, wouldn’t it?
Mr. G. Allen—I don’t see why some people
like T— or Miss G— can get these
problems and you can’t.
2A
A Well Known Fact:
When we go out to promenade
We look so fine and gay
We have to take the dogs along
To keep the boys away.
We Have in IIA:
A Baker but no Butcher.
A Beatty but no Apex.
A Broad but no Long.
A Campbell but no Heintz.
A Coral but no Ruby.
A Day but no Night.
A Green but no Brown.
A Nash but no Ford.
A Page but no Leaf.
A Silverberg but no Iceberg.
A Sommer but no Winter.
Questionnaire:
What girl in IIA reminds you of Alice in
Wonderland? (Through the looking glass.)
When will Irene Kondaks learn that
slience is golden?
What would we be like if we followed
the rules of the book of manners?
Song Hits:
Helen Roth—You Can’t Stop Me From
Dreaming.
Ruth Silverberg—Deep in a Dream of
You.
Lillian Teachman—Lost in a Fog.
(Latin.)
Dorothy Baker—I Don’t Want to Make
History.
Anna Van Arc—In a Little Dutch
Kindergarten.
German—You Go to My Head.
Geometry—I Can’t Escape From You.
French—I’ve Got You Under My Skin.
2B
Tid-Bits From the Study World:
Flash—Miss McRoberts is certainly
amazed at our spurt of activity upon entering
her room. She doesn’t know we are all
endeavouring to master the latest proposition
that she had assigned the night
before.
—Was Anita L’s face red! The student
teacher didn’t agree with her idea concerning
his sanity.
P.S.—The teacher won the debate!
Pleas From Pupils:
Extry!—We wish somebody would start a
campaign for less homework. He would
have plenty of supporters I bet!
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THE MAGNET 1939
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IIB Drones'.
4.
Sights
—Shirley Sax’s little girl styles.
—Iris Hillis’ Dutch hairdress.
5.
—Anita’s Hula dance in the gym.
Savings
Kay Watt’s never ceasing—“I was sick, 6.
Miss McCamus”
Hearings
Barbara Shannon’s crooning.
Georgina Patterson’s gay whistling.
P.S.—Form a band.
Thought For The Day:
Big girls from short skirts grow. And
how!
Musing Moments:
We are wondering if the love bug has
bit Jean Jordan.
2C
Why does Anne Shilton wear that angelic
expression when answering a question—we
know it isn’t genuine.
June Rose,
Sat on a pin,
June rose.
Wc Advocate:
1. Desk ’phones with party lines to facilitate
inter-form communication for the
benefit of Audrey Wells and Dick
Burn.
2. The equipping of all rooms with
murphy beds for the comfort of sleepy
sophomores such as Helen Mowatt and
Gloria Shonteff.
SiddokS
The establishment of a barber shop and
beauty salon for the convenience of
staff and students and Olga Wilson.
The abolition of the use of rubber heels
by members of the staff.
An adequate system of old age pensions
for perennial repeaters and the
passage of a Loafers’ Compensation
Act for the relief of all who have been
maimed in the pursuit of knowledge.
Pat Long, “Bishy” Millar and Joy
Moffat would appreciate this.
A one-word description of Miss Little—
“Kittenish”.
Does Mary Baird like “Stew”???
Could it be Mary Bishop is pining away
for a certain young man in VC???
2 DEDUCTIONS
THE INTER-FORM RUGBY CHAMPS
Well, from all the first forms in the
school (and some seconds) we are grouped
together in TWO D TO Discuss some of
the appalling circumstances in the form
such as Grindlay’s broken arm and Nellie
Hardway’s weak voice and annoying giggle.
Some day I wish someone who sits near
Rabjohns would tell me when he can display
his usual literary knowledge to Mr.
Booth without looking at the notes in the
back of the book and also tell me when the
longer of the two Silcoxes can answer one
of Mademoiselle Elliot’s questions without
adding his usual “er something” as a suffix
to the sentence.
If anyone sees Pearson dash out of the
room before the girls (or let anyone else)
unless it is the end of the fourth or ninth
periods tell someone like Wilkins or Shaw
who can spread the news quickly.
The pending feud between Miss Mc­
Camus and the friendship of Weir and
Vanderwater drew to a temporary armistice
around the beginning of the year when a
verbal contract was made, 100% in favour
of Miss McCamus—we all hope it works.
It has been heard that among the girls
Eleanor Grant is called “the flirt” — we
doubt it though? ? ?
The world would certainly be on the
verge of destruction if Phipps had his his-
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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
tory up to date, if Catherine Dick forgot
her Latin stems again after the dilemma
with Mr. Staples, if Norris ever remembered
his Latin genders or if Safarian fell down
in Mr. Hill’s estimation.
It has been recommended that Wilson
should take some machine oil for his voice
and Mosley some for his pen.
Every morning it seems as though Sells,
the Flat Foot Floogie of the form, is giving
Hagan his Latin homework.
The masculine portion of the form wish
to compliment both Doris Darwin and
Betty Cook for their co-operation by speaking
audibly while they ask the other girls
such as Doreen Grey, Margaret Bozinoff
and Doris Mark to talk just as loudly as
they do in the corridors.
Well! goodbye till next year when we
will most likely be all over the J.C.I. again.
M. Y. Self.
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SiddonS.
News Flashes—! !
Brien and Cole—Cole tells the jokes of our
form and Brien tries to laugh.
Grimshaw and Cottrell—Grimshaw knows
all and tells all while Cottrell listens in.
Calverly and Durand—The two “redheads”
are special “friends” of Mr. Bowman.
Fletcher—Our Latin and Geometry professor
takes pride in himself in these
subjects.
69
Corolis—“Gus” is our special Geometry
wizard.
Campbell—“A loud laugh bespeaks a
vacant mind, Alex.”
Lennox, Lind, Nowers—These fellows are
IIE’s emigrants from Brown School.
Purvis—A good boy when he sleeps, which
happens all day long.
Ashton and Brown—This pair are IIE’s
percentages of innocence.
Blizzard and Blackwell—Quote “If we
don’t pass we will go to South America”
Unquote—We don’t think they will get
that far.
Thompson—A young “cub” from Hamilton.
Fenton—The class clown.
Breckles—The lad who “thumbs his way”
to and from school.
Francis—The eternal member of Mr.
Wright’s Geometry club.
Be Our hockey star is as quiet as a
mouse. (Ahem.)
Chong—The lad who is calm and collected.
Smith—Sometimes this fellow gets into
trouble. You have to watch him—he’ll
ruin our reputation.
Desjardine—The big boy who is afraid of
a gas burner.
Atkinson—Laughs and talks but never
listens.
Caterine—IIE’s sleeping beauty.
McCracken — Our new addition from
Lawrence Park. He likes Jarvis better,
he thinks!
Armstrong—IIE’s musician, he plays in the
gymnasium at noon hours.
Birni He never gives any unsolicited
answers.
Goodwins—Has returned to J.C.I. after a
year’s absence.
Cherrit—Our regular member of the swimming
club.
Grant—“The old army veteran”. He’s in
the army now.
Dymond—“Bulldog” for short, a likeable
lad in our form from Winnipeg.
2F
SHAKESPEARian FOLLIES
Dramatics Personae, IIF
Friends, Romans, Students, lend me
your ears. I come to praise IIF not to
belittle it.
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THE MAGNET 19 39
The evil that Lawson does is shown in his
Geometry
Where Whitfield is ambitious Gherkin is
not
Geleff is an excellent man in French
While McFaul is not what you’d call hot
Lotto lives on work and therefore is an
honourable student
Micks has little trouble in Latin
But Marks in this subject is fit to be sat on
Gall in sport has brought many honours to
us
And Masters also without much fuss
For Geography “Diz Deane” does not care
But in this Jeffries and Hoffman are a
perfect pair
I speak not to disprove what M. Brokenshire
says
But since a test our unlucky number is
“treize”
You may think the Kachuk grins inane
But underneath have they got brains.
Huard, MacLean, Faye, Johnston and
Stevenson many morns have missed
While Brown, McCombie and Lorimer for
punctuality
Have outdone Gordon in his search for
reality
McKay and McKague are generally getting
mixed up
Not so with our friends Ivory and Butt
0 Masters for Komisar and Kizoff in this
line
Hang it! I can’t find one to rhyme
In French, Habib, Letros and Ferguson
Are not as super as Farlow in this one
And now to end this lengthy oration
r\ s-\ rv>
IIG—1960
Macintosh — Owner of Radio Station
WBUD, Undershirt, Kansas (don’t let
it get around but he hasn’t got a
license).
Mager—Soap box orator in Hyde Park,
London. (“Down with everything!”)
Gillespie—Geologist in Kingston. (Probably
chipping rocks.)
Blackstone—Comedian on the Swartz Bubble
Gum program. (The only sponsor
who would ever take him.)
Remember next year to tune in on this Shaul (“Kid”)—Photographer for the
station. “Cactus Centre Daily Tribune”.
IIF signing off-
Leskovic—Multimillionaire owner of the
Puddlesburg Pirates baseball team.
2G
AS SOME TEACHERS SAW US
Mr. Stcinhaucr—You boys are getting like
IIE, the elite form of the school.
Mr. Jenkins—What happened to my good
shipmates today. What were you doing
over the week-end?
Mr. Bowman—For a class of 19 you guys
make more noise than 119.
Mr. Moorhouse—From the way you speak
Latin, you wouldn’t have lasted long in
Caesar’s time!
Snatches of IIG Conversations
Student Latin Teacher—“The word for
night in Latin is Nox noctis.”
Burich—“Who’s there?”
Mr. Brokenshire—“I’ll throw you out of
the window, Hawes!”
Hawes—“It wouldn’t hurt, I’ve got my
light fall coat on!”
Mr. McKerracher—“What’s better than
presence of mind?”
Ivan Mark—“Absence of body!”

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JARVIS COLLEGIATE 71
3A
Dear 3A:
After delving into mystic book lore and
ancient formulae, the meanings of some of
your Christian names plus a few comments
have been discovered. Here goes:
Name
Leonard S.
Ralph A.
Sylvia R.
John S.
George A.
Bill H.
Byron B.
Name
Dorothy M.
Betty M.
Mary SI.
Florence R.
Pat H.
Murray H.
Mary Sar.
Norma M.
Betty R.
Jack S.
Marg. S.
Doris M.
Pearl B.
Madeline D.
Marg. C.
Elaine R.
Doris W.
Eleanor W.
Laurette R.
Marj. B.
Arthur M.
Vivian R.
Fred D.
May G.
Eleanor D.
Marie A.
Meaning
Brave as a lion
A wolf
Of the woods
A gracious gift
A husband man
The protector
Strong
W eakness
A blissful blonde
Skiing with instructors
A gridiron and ice hero
It wouldn’t be homework
Cheer leaders
Dime novels
Mr. Jenkins: “Have you proved this
problem, Spencer?”
Spencer: “Well, sir, ‘proved’ is a strong
word, but I will say that I have rendered
it highly probable.”
Comment
Even in Latin, Len?
Careful gals! Maybe he’s wearing sheep’s
clothing.
Zat where yo all studies, Sil?
But definitely.
My! My! Georgie of all people.
Methinks that’s right up your alley, Bill.
Wonder who’ll be his Delilah?
Appearance
Rawther!
Age
Hoo cares any hoo?
Tall, dark and terrific 5-50
Oh boy!
?
O.K. by us. Yes, indeed Don’t be nosey
Not bad! No sir
Ya got me!
Formal dances and big cars A bit of all right
Oh, things ’n stuff Sophisticated
Anything but algebra Pleasing and pleasant
Poetry and a 3A Miss Heavenly
Omitted by request Wait’ll ya see’r
It’s a secret
Nice ’n willowy
Getting up
A little behind time
Remembering history dates Gingerly
Certainly not les gargons Yum! Yum!
Maybe she hasn’t one
Distracting our 3A’rs
Whispering to the teacher
Zee Dramatiques
Exams in general
5'4"
Ferry boats
Being bashful
Blushing and looking
A seat in the blues
Breaking hearts
Delicious
Yippee!
Nice in general
Woo! Woo!
Now that is something
Dainty
Hm—mmm
Breath-taking
A dream walking
Eye-opener
Not very often
Ask me another
Still teething
Under oath
Touchy subject
Wot’s it to ya?
Eccentric
Sir!
Don’t be sil.
Wham!
Wot’s tha dif?
Sh!
Sweet . . .
Just too, too
Wouldn’t believe it
Should I tell ’em?
S’nuff said
Hides it well
Ain’t talkin’
Kinda middlin’
Censored
Quiet!
About right
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THE MAGNET 1939
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To the reader who reads this news today,
I hope you will read it again some day,
And think when you do, that the lines that
you see,
Contain many truths of the gals of 3B.
Wouldn’t It Be a Morgue Without—
—Marion Russell exercising her ability of
being a poetess in algebra periods.
—Mabel Ing’s and Marion Quinn’s bright
remarks in physics periods such as:
“Please sir, when Tungsten wire is subjected
to a very great heat, it gets
warm.”
—Jean Ross' speeches about Madoc.
—Agnes Nelson’s travel-talks about Keene
and Peterborough.
—Those noon-hour jitterbugs, Mary Mazaris,
Beryl Wrattan and Neva Weager.
—Shirley Diamond giving a review of her
latest rave.
—Peggie Knox always being in the scandal
news at the History Club.
—Eleanor Hammond’s slight leaps when
asked a question in history periods.
Bright Remarks!
Said Kay Kent (who is our traffic leader)
to Doreen Switzer—“Sh-h, don’t tell anyone,
but I think I’m being followed”.
THE ALPHABET RHYMING
3C
A is for Anderson, whose pride is D. S.,
B is for Baker, uncareless in dress.
C is for (the) Cantor, of well-known fame,
D is for Durdy, Rosalind’s last name.
E is for Eckel, moustaches, his poise,
F is for Fraser, a girl for the boys.
G is for Graham, the teacher’s own pet,
H is for Holland, another, we bet!
I is for Isobel, knowing cube, surd and
square,
J is for Jewitt, giving May a glare,
Iv is for Kuchar, a wizard at German,
L is for Leitch, always getting a sermon.
M is for Martin, a cut-up in class,
N is for Nancy, most certain to pass.
P is for Peters, who always seems glad.
Q is for question, a thing to expect.
Q is for question, a thing to expect,
R is for Richardson, answering yet.
S is for Smith, who knows her pages,
T is for Turner, of variable ages.
(On the radio.)
U is for understanding, which takes quite
a time,
V is for Viola, stuck in for rhyme.
W is for Walker, who thinks history a
strife,
X is for ’xam, the dread of our life.
Y is for Yorick, who hopes to know surds,
Z is for Zieman, who in Comp, knows her
words.
This is the end,
Et c’est le fini
To the alphabet rhyming
Of good old 3C.
3D
A SUPPOSITION
If 3D Took an Outing After School
Me Coy would pick a fight with Hatch.
Teale wouldn’t miss the opportunity of
catching up on “The Bat Flies Low”.
Mr. McKerracher’s voice would hum in
McNamenomony’s ears.
Syd. Steinberg would be admiring a
picture of Hedy Lamar, while Leon Steinberg,
the hairdresser, would be fixing our
lady killer’s hair.
Ernest Robinson would practice the
:

JARVIS COLLEGIATE 73
Lambeth Walk; Jack Robinson would
keep time with an ”Oi, Oi”.
Tobin would swap a wrestling hold with
Nick Kostachuk for a few foreign words
0
n 2.x
(Ja). i
Larking, who never misses a boat, would
l'B
wonder if Thorpe’s sneezes were contracted
on a trip across the bay.
Postel would be confident in asking
three-hour-a-night Berenstein where the
sandwiches were.
Erlick would still worry whether
“Butch” Wagman or gum-chewing Stephens
were next in French.
Hoffman wouldn’t be along; he’d still be
looking for the lost pad.
Wade would forget the sandwiches and
prepare for Mary.
West and Shoot would try running a bit.
Cousins would be studying Latin.
Stitt and Caswell would be discussing
moustaches.
Dowe would be blowing his horn.
“Accusative and infinitive” Weitzman
would be tossing the ball around with
“Braces” McCaulay.
Yankoo would be wondering what to do
with his week’s growth.
Gardner would love D’Arcy’s comments
on photography, while Thomas would be
attentively looking on.
Wilson would still be sorry about those
shoes he bought.
Mah would be drawing pictures of
Chandler who, Cowan predicts, will turn
out to be a coal dealer.
Whithame would pick a fight with our
prophet and Scott and Wilkins would
quietly look on. Thompson, Surphlis and
Stuart would be yelling to go home.
Join us next year.
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/*V«H
Notorious 3E Gangsters Caught in a
Typical Study Class
First, we see Eddie Jardine staring
vacantly into space. We wonder why? Bob
Moore and Russell hold hands ... remember
boys, there’s a time and place for
everything. McKillop, Lindsay, Switzer
and Yule hold a social meeting. In the other
corner, Hurst chews contentedly on a small
stick of timber. Cotterill and Gibson have
their usual talk on stuff and things, while
Bonney studies diligently on. How he does
it, we’ll never know. Ginsler and Pristupa
engage in a “battle royal”. Gogoff and
Paxton jointly read the last letter from
Daneff. Upper, (our play-boy), borrows
note-books. Domander casts eager glances
at the extra girls. Good intentions we hope.
“The noisiest boy of 3E”, Jones, talks endlessly
on. Dixon waits for some errand to
do. The Burgess’ boys compare note-books.
Shackelton, the elastic man, has a merry
time, while Tidy and Macfarlane discuss,
between yawns, their previous week-end.
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Sedgewick and Urquhart argue as regards
to the ever-present paper beneath the
desks. Breithaupt reads the latest health
magazine. Hiscox. the only pacifist in the
class, surveys the scene with his seaweathered
brow, shakes his head, and returns
to his work.
MOTHER GOOSE LOOKS AT
4A
Sing a song of sixpence
Glad I am to tell,
Forty happy students
Get along right well.
Jean Caswell
A rugby star, an usher, a locket of gold
Put them together and a tale is told.
Mildred Coutts and Thelma Harris
Curly Locks, Curly Locks, wilt thou be
mine,
With nails long and painted, you look
too divine.
Alice Hill
Someone in our class I am sure
Likes Tommy Trut, a man of the law.
Eileen, Margaret and Dorothy
Three blind mice I’ve heard tell
Like the French teacher very well.
Denise, Doreen, Naydene
Three little kittens as bad as can be
You seldom see one, you mostly see three.
Anne Silvcrstein
There was a young lady and streamlined
too,
Had so many boy friends she didn’t know
what to do.
Mae Schwartz
Little Bo-Peep who chews gum too,
Makes her teachers shiver all through.
Jean McKinney
A diller, a dollar, our 9.20 scholar.
Marian Gray
A plump little girl climbed up Wisdom’s
hill
A dear little bucket for to fill,
She filled it right up to the very top
And in descending spilled not a drop.
Alice Haick
Little Miss Muffet, Oh what did she do
To get Miss McRobert in such a stew.
SJiyrlc, Mary Emerson, Margaret Wright,
Leona
Teacher, may we go out to swim?
John Anderson
A little boy sat in a corner
Doing his lessons right well,
A student came in and how we did grin
When she called him Mademoiselle.
Daniels
Twinkle, twinkle, our rugby star,
If you were only as good as some think
you are.
4D
Bright spots: Marion (here today and
gone tomorrow) Landell’s lipstick. Annie
(alias Ann, Anne, etc.) Braden’s nail
polish. . . . What, in a certain west-end
collegiate, “gets” Dot Rymal? Probably
some Tom, Dick or Harry. . . . Street scene
(corner of Jarvis and Wellesley): Pat
Huard tenderly warbling, “Oh, Bury Me
NOT”, accompanied by “Willie” Lemon
on the hurdy-gurdy. . . . Pansies to Elvira
Bricker, ping-pong leader: “Peace at Any
Price”. Ditto to Louise Ring who begs,
coaxes and pleads for “more articles” and,
b’gosh, still remains a lady. . . Quartette
extraordinaire: Gay Armour, Rosemary
Oldfield, Enid Morriss and Marg. Lake.
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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
"Let us develop your sp(squ)eaking voice
into bell-like tones”. . . . Phyl Edmondson's
favourite song is “Deep in a Dream”.
(Aha, we thought so.) ... What WAS Vel
Goold doing at “Ye Okie Mille”. . . What
Beverly Bradshaw learned at Jarvis: How
to sneeze, and a fowl imitation. . . . Have
you all noticed those mysterious jaunts of
Shirley Van Natter, fourth period Friday?
. . . . Clara or Isabel Hatton: “Quick,
where’s a short, snappy Bible selection?”
. . . . Virtues: Marg. Gillard—patience
(e.g., readin’ “The Courtin’!”). Betty
Dick—persistence (I’ll get that geom. or
. . ). Marg. Mitchell—length (she just
drops the ball into the basket). . . Needed:
A rowboat to bring Jean McClarty from
Hanlan’s hence. Jean gets tired strolling
the deck alone. . . . Why was Ruth Janney
so determined to call sea foam “suds”? . .
Gaze on Marg. George and profit! There
she sits in a back seat where she was
banished by the injustice of fate. . . Sylvia
Levitt: Perpetual motion gal. (Jitterbug to
you). . . . Flash! Josephine Climo brutally
kicks Rosemary’s books down the hall. . .
Kay, who’s the lad we hear humming,
“Waiting at the Gate for Katy” about twice
a week? . . . Jane Corcoran (apologetically)
: Yes, I got my geometry. . . . Marg.
Bennet: I — don’t — know, sir. Marion
Staples (very sotto voce): mumble,
mumble (the answer). Marg. (straining her
ears): I’ll know in a minute, sir! . . .
There! We got you all in, and this is where
we came in. . .
4C
75
REMEMBER?
—Mr. Jenkins’ aspirin tablets before handing
back our geometry papers.
—That husky individual in the lockerroom,
who raises CANE every P. T.
period.
—Mr. Staples: “What happened at Thermopylffi?”
Ackermann: “Mm, mm, Oh! Thermopylae
is where the battle of Marathon
was fought.”
—Petite Miss Wheeler’s (she prefers the
“Miss”): “I don’t get it” . . (pause) . .
“hee, hee, hee, hah, hah,” (She got it.)
—How forlorn Betty Broad and Bertha
Hochmintz look when they get up to
answer a history question.
—Lewis: (As Mr. Cox, speaking to Mr.
Box): “But no, she is your fiancee.”
—“Little Liz” McDermott, who requires
two desks for comfort.
A SQUINT INTO THE FUTURE—
“Flash” Birmann—(Jarvis rugby coach)
“Come on boys, show some spirit, get
out there and mow ’em down. When I
played for Jarvis, I won, I mean we won
every game.”
Grossman—(Candidate for Board of Education)
“If you elect me I’ll put escalators in
every school, abolish Latin, install a radio
in every classroom, over which lessons will
be broadcast (and easily switched off),
have all seats upholstered, a fountain in
every classroom, hot drinks served between
classes, etc., etc.
Teichmann—Still sleeping.
Gale—(Research chemist — as he flies
through the air)
“Ah I have it, it’s sodium acetylsalicylate.
“Brains” Cole—Just a moocher.
Lerner—(A medicine-show barker)
“Laydeez and gentlemen, I have here the
cure of cures, the universal remedy, which
is absolutely guaranteed to cure smallpox,
fallen arches, chilblains, hoof and mouth
disease, etc., at 2Sc, only one quarter of a
dollar a bottle.”
Mary Maclean
A shrewd (?) business woman.
Waisberg
Hailed from coast to coast as the forei
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most impersonator of Popeye and Mr.
Jenkins on the continent.
Evelyn Thomson
Ah! who knows?
Jim Jenkins
A professor of languages.
Alexander Chris
“Da champeen rassler of da woild who
will meet all comahs.”
Mary Howitt
A suave, sophisticated woman of the
world, an accomplished linguist (pig-
Latin).
Quan
A commercial artist—painting signboards.
Bertha Goldenthal
A concert pianist, touring the South
Pole and Africa,
Joy Winters
A pretty Dolphinet.
Shustermann
Pharmacist, alias soda-jerker.
4D
Shilton—Still asking Wyckoff to come out
with him, with Marg. B,
Griffiths and Brigham—‘Where have we
met before?”
Wyckoff—He woos the ladies with his
Russian Lullaby.
Miller—Is a changed man ever since St.
Mike’s were beaten 6-0 by Oshawa in
’39. (He has nothing to live for.)
Fergus—He sure used to fool Mr, Cook
with his “?” translation of Virgil.
Melville—We’ll never forget the way he
used to lure fellows into the dressingroom
in P.T. and then lend invaluable
assistance in disrobing said victims.
Merrick—to a little girl in pigtails —
“How’dya like to love me?”
Jovce—“Get in your lousy seat and stay
there!”
Barker—About the only sound we could
make out when “The Old Curiosity
Shop” was shown in the Aud. in ’39, was
Barker’s heavy breathing due to a tight
knot in his favourite bow-tie.
Matthews—We think he could hang by his
feet and still keep his hat on.
Mowatt—He used to love answering a
certain student-teacher’s question.
Thanks for the memory of school clocks
striking nine,
Reports at Easter time (the awful letdown),
And wond’ring if Bruce ever
Got to any class on time?
How sleepy we were.
Down the Years to 1949 A.D.
Mr, Brokcnshire—Divides his time between .
playing French records, checking the pad Many s the time that we skipped
and telling everyone what a fine form nianys the time that we flipped
4D was in ’39.
(coppers).
Oh, well, it was h— while is lasted,
We did have fun and no work done.
Patterson—Winnipeg news: “Mr. Pegg^
Knox was before his recent marriage Mr.
John Patterson of Toronto.
Toogood—His voice is still changing.
Bruce—“Oh how I hate to get up in the
morning.”
And thanks for the memory
Of 4D’s straggling line
That’s never been on time
And the day we wore form sweaters
Quinn That “Prep” hat is still stuck to por the first and only time,
his head.
Thank you so much.
Doug. Brown—The burning question!
Why he was never late, 1st period, Monday
afternoon?
4E
Haffey—Piano players seem to strike a Macmillan—“I have nothing but praise
love song on his heart strings.
for the new minister.”
Harrold—He still thinks “Everyday’s a MacCluskey—“So I noticed when the
Holiday”.
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JARVIS COLLEGIATE 77 I
WHERE THERE’S SMOKE . .
Mr. Booth—“Who wrote this essay on
the ‘Painted Face’? You Fenton?”
Fenton—“No sir, I used paper.”
* * *
Mr. Staples—“What’s a Grecian urn?”
Thomas—“About $50.44 a week if he’s
good.”
* * *
Student teacher—“If I said, ‘I’m handsome’,
what tense would it be?”
Hobbs—“Pretence.”
* * *
Judge—“You admit you drove over this
man with a loaded truck?”
Parker—“Y-Y-Yes s-s-sir.”
Judge—“And what have you to say for
yourself?”
Parker—“I-I-I didn’t know it was loaded,
sir.”
* * *
Mr. Bowman—“Jacobs, did you take a
shower?”
Jacobs—“No sir, is there one missing?”
* * *
Mr. Holmes—“Do you think paper can
be used effectively to keep people warm?”
Greenwood—“Yes sir, my Christmas report
card kept the family hot for a week.”
5k 5k *
Mr. Staples—“What did they call those
tablets the Gauls wrote on?”
Greer—“Gaul stones, sir.”
terested in swimming, driving fast and
girls.
Holford—Willy’s “jam session” can always
be heard around the room. Always
making weird cracks about everything
in general.
Boult bee—An ex-Model boy (he boasts
about it). Can make some witty jokes
and remarks.
Goodrich—Dick’s a good swimmer and
diver. Played senior rugby this year.
Always cracking feeble jokes and puns.
Smith—A native of Creemore who joined
us at Christmastide. Plays good hockey
for the juniors. Noted for his thunderous
voice.
Blatter—Our handsome star in senior rugby
and hockey.. Johnny’s very popular with
the girls.
Ansar a—Our mining boy—really has spent
a lot of time “down under”. Popular
with the lads of our form,
Morfitt—An ace student and a strong arm
in interform sports.
Skeajj—A popular lad; played senior
rugby; knows several girls—especially a
blonde.
Keary—Seems to be asleep most of the
time, but always comes out on top in
sports and studies. Played junior rugby
and hockey.
Staples—Played junior • rugby. Get’s the
goat of several teachers by seeming to
be sleeping.
Weir—Played good senior rugby and senior
hockey. Mr. Wright seems to get a little
angry at him now and then, but Armour
comes through O.K.
(
5k =k *
Gundy—Provides a good transportation
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UPPER SCHOOL
“Mr. Moto” Caulfield—Cambridge University.
He hopes to be a diplomat. Maybe
he’ll get a parasol,
All characters strictly fictitious. Any re-
semblance to persons sleeping or awake is Helen Citron—Music teacher. Poor Helen
purely accidental.
AMBITIONS
Nancy Anderson—Sick Children’s Hospital,
Why, Nancy, we thought you were older
than that!
Lorraine Anglesey—School marm. ’Nuff
said.
Harry Appleby—Is going in for medicine.
“An apple a day . . —press, shine,
strut.
Doug. Appleton—C. A.—Will probably
juggle accounts like he juggles a hockey
puck.
Al Arnold—Heading for pharmacy. A
rugby player and swimmer. Has one
(saving) Grace. Most beautiful boy in
Jarvis.
Attallah—SB’s mystery man.
Betty Bell—Ambition to be world’s tennis
champ, at Wimbledon.
Harry Birkenshaw—Going to U. of T. Will
be an insurance salesman. Why is he so
interested in Humberside?
Julian Brace—Will go to S.P.S. Mechanical
engineer. Why is he so interested in
Y.W.C.A. activity?
Berenice Bricker—Varsity. Won’t she be
surprised if somebody takes her at her
word some day—instead of “excuse me”,
Berenice says, “squeeze me”.
Helen Brian—The Red Horner of 5B.
is so worried—she just can’t decide
whether to wear her hair up or down.
Giggle-water with a dash of lemon.
Percival Clarfield—Will be a promoter —
and run the first Canadian sweepstakes.
7,ella Cochrane.—Ambition to join the
Mounlies and “get her man”!
Frank Conway—Has an affinity for inkerasers—a
passion for skipping periods.
R.C.A.F.
Eileen Cumberland—Where on earth did
you get that nickname, Eileen?
Josephine Cults—Normal School. Where’s
Napoleon, Josie?
Bob Co!bran—Will be a cake salesman. He
is the tall blonde fellow with the perpetually
puzzled look. What’s the attraction
on Farnham Ave., Bob?
Al. Darby shire—Will be a pharmacist. A
popular “man-about-school”.
John Del Grande—Chemist. Personal to a
blonde — “Please come home — all is
forgiven”.
Harold. Desscn—Ultimate career a dark
secret.
Alexander Duncan—S.P.S. to take civil
engineering—will end up sweeping roads.
Jim Edwards—May get a job some day,
who knows?
Jack Farlow—The “all-round” boy of
hockey—yes, he gets around.
Farrell—A red-headed sphinx. Will probably
be a detective.
Morris Filderman—“Scholarship material”.
Ambition to make holes in doughnuts.
She’s quite a hockey star, they say. Maybe
her ambition to be a nurse springs
from the necessity of patching herself up
after a
Martin Britain-Going in for law. Perhaps Do^\ ^"^-“Disney II”. Will dig
someone will teach the poor fellow the ditches to fill them in again.
facts of life-—“Why doesn’t somebody Irving Frankel—No ultimate career, ultimately.
tell me these things?”
Peggy Fraser—Occupational therapy. Her
Royden Brigham—Evidently thinks Miss
bangles jangle—cannibalistic?
St. John believes the old proverb,
Jacky Friedman—A vitriolic speaker. Will
“Absence makes the heart grow fonder”.
take up law. Will either be a genius or a
Norma Bruce—English Specialist. Her gangster.
biggest thrill was when Box put his Eleanor George—Normal School. “Miss
arm around her. (See Box and Cox.) George, did you solve this problem?”
Art “Soup” Campbell—Vic.—P. T. teacher. (We didn’t.)
This is not an advertisement, but “Soup” Glazier—Pharmacy. Is troubled with inhas
good taste when it comes to selecting somnia.
his associates on the advertising staff of Simcoe Gold—Meds. After five years of
The Magnet—and from first form! ribbing we haven’t got the heart.

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Joan Cover—Normal. Out to get her revenge
on society. Theme song: “Gover
come back to me”.
Murray Goldenthal — The “answer-to-amaiden’s-prayer”.
Freda Grade—Nurse (gee!). Is she as
na'ive as she seems? Remember her
question to 5B regarding a Christmas
basket?
John Hamilton—Busy career—that would
be a change!
Ken. Harmon—Ambition: to corner the
chewing gum market.
Fred Harris—Will spend a few more years
here. Ambition: to get out of Jarvis.
Laurie Harris—Will take up radio at
S.P.S. Ambition: to make the biggest
induction coil in Toronto.
Eric Haynes—Will spend many happy
years at J.C.I. Pensioned after eight
years.
Rod Heather—A flashy hockey player.
Will die in dear old Jarvis.
Horace Hcys—Otherwise known as “the
Jarvis dude”. When better padded
shoulders are worn, “Horrors” will wear
them.
Jim Hickling—Will go to U. of T. next
year. How does he get into so many
places for nothing? Runs competition to
Sawyer.
Murray Hojjberg—Will be a booky. Will
teach “Kamistry” at Jarvis. An expert
on “test chubs”.
Doug. Hyde—Tall, dark and handsome
like L’il Abner. A relation to a little
green.
Sammy Israel—Sammy might go in with
Harmon on the gum chewing market.
James “Jitters” Janetos—Will take up
pharmacy and devote his life to making
the weaker sex more attractive.
Ken. Jardine—Law. Evidently the strong,
79
silent type. We haven’t heard a word
from him all year.
Mary Jay—Varsity—dietician. Mary, “the
shoe-string girl”, cleans everyone’s running
shoes at nine o’clock—much to
Miss St. John’s disgust.
Marion Jenkins—Varsity. Greek and Latin.
We asked Marion who was the reason
she has taken to lipstick and nail-polish,
but she answered, “My heart belongs to
Daddy”.
Margaret Johnson—Chemical research. Her
favourite answer, “I missed that lesson,
sir”.
Don Kerr—Going to Business College.
Evidently running a race with Gold.
Norma King—Normal School. If Griffiths
and Bigham had that fight about her,
why did Norma wear bandages on her
chin?
Jean Knight—Archaeologist. I wonder
whose past she’ll dig up.
David Knox—S.P.S. Commercial aviation.
He’s tall, dark and handsome — the
answer to every Jarvis maiden’s prayer.
Evelyn Lamb—Teacher or a nurse. Mc­
Cord has our little Lamb and Johnnie
just can’t get her.
Forbes Le Clair—The teachers’ yes-man.
Law.
Irwin “Itchy” Lichtman—U. of T. Medicine.
Alias “Itchy”. How should we know
why?
Harry Lightstone—Will study in “College
of Musical Knowledge”. Will finally lead
a swing band.
Phyllis Lithgow—Vic. The “mighty atom”,
especially when it comes to answering
history questions.
Sol. Littman—Psychology, psychiatry, law,
or just plumb pass arts. Will probably
write the great Canadian novel.
Roy Locke—S.P.S. Will learn psychology.
Run an “advice to the lovelorn” column.
Ian Lounsbury—S.P.S. Will sell brushes
with the rest of the engineers. An ideal
type for a backwoodsman.
Ruby Ma—Toronto Conservatory. She’s
our feminine version of Paderewski.
Roberta Macdonald—Journalist. She writes
poetry—other people are crazy, too.
Verna MacDonald—Our musical might or
mite (?).
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H avoid Mad or sky—Law. Intends to terrify ers may go, but “Greasy” goes on forthe
judges with a word he's going to ever.
look up in the dictionary.
Marian Newnham—School marm. No.
Dorothy Mai use—Normal School. I wonder Johnnie, the glue is not used as brillianwhy
Reid chose her as the vendor of his tine!
“contributions to humanity” in our form? John Nidd—Brother John may go to
Joan Marlow—Honour Science. When she S.P.S. Cherchez la femme, John.
went skiing one day, she stepped on Madeleine N our sc — Another school marm
Duncan, thinking he was a ski.
Johnnie!—little gentlemen do not bop
Alice Marshall—Physiotherapy. Alice had
gentlewomen in the puss.
to sit with Heather in a study period one
day. What an experience!
Frank Paterson — University — household
Scotto McBride—Forestry. Get up in
science—is growing his hair to wear it up
God’s country with the woman.
—has a Mona Lisa smile.
Sam McCall—Will go to J.C.I. next year. Jim Pickard— Remember his bright remark
He will be an early bird and sell fishworms.
to dance?” And, of course, no one did.
to the female stag-line, “Well, who wants
Doreen McCann—Dental nurse. We won't Louis Ray—Forestry—get up in God’s
mind going to the dentist any more. country away from all the women.
Roy “Lefty” McCord—As the immor(t)al Norm Rex—A little man with big ideas—
bard once said, “Lefty had a little Lamb, will be a warden at Alcatraz.
but so did every other ham”. McCord
John Reid—Ambition—to learn how to
is a bulwark of defence on the hockey
work a punchboard—next year who
team.
John McCrory—Has a great future ahead
knows?
of him. With his connections he should Daniil Ruffle—Ambition—to meet Reid on
run an escort service.
a lonely road.
Frank McDonnell—Will be in 4E, J.C.I. Don Rife—Will get a soft job at the City
next year. Will work his way through Hall, earn a large salary, and retire at an
J.C.I.
early age.
Peg.-McDougall—Most beautiful girl in Lucille Riley—Physiotherapy—ambition—
Jarvis (gosh we’re blind). Was once asked
why she wanted to get married—she boxed the Cox.
to live down Mrs. Bouncer, when she
popped the guy.
Chuck Rimvier—S.P.S.—chemist—may become
smart—
Bruce McFarrcn — Chemical research.
“Confidentially,” to quote Mischa Auer, Sadie Rosenthal—Are you sure that all
“It . . . !”
those class-pins you wear belong to your
Don McKic—Will spend next year recuperating.
Will wait for opportunity to Sara Roth—Pharmacy—a good judge of
brother, Sadie?
knock.
humour, they say.
Cynthia McMartin—Ambition: to ride in Jack Rousom—Height, 5 feet 9; weight,
Wong’s aeroplane. Physiotherapy — 98%—an Adonis in a Boy Scout’s uniform—S.P.S.
MtcNulty—Business School. Has Fin- Doug Rundlc—Varsity M.D.—will practise
(?) medicine—a deadly diver in his
\>.U layJ asked her yet?
iji v Henry Mendelson—Plays “besket-bool”. spare moments.
An agency for supplying Public School- Jim Sanders—Study to be a tramp—will
ers with essays.
secretly bury Dr. Rundle’s patients.
Bill Mitchell—The original day-dreamer. Ted Sawyer—Had to rest up a few days
It is reliably reported that he intends to after going out with Peg.—eh, Ted?
write a new chemistry text.
Bob Servos — S.P.S. — learn to be an
Murray Mitchell—God’s country and NO engineer on a vacuum cleaner—a camera
woman.
fiend.
Doug. “Greasy” Morrice—S.P.S.. Electrical Miriam Shedlowsky—dietitian—we have it
engineering. Teachers may come, teach- on good authority that Miriam is a bril-

V
JARVIS COLLEGIATE 81
liant conversationalist, her forte being
“uh-huh.”
Helen SibbaId—Born in Saskatchewan and
never lived to regret it.
Jack Siddons—Will go to radio school. He
wants to see the sea.
Frances Silverberg—Has gobs and gobs of
delicious lipstick (no, we haven’t tasted
it.)
Malta Sivitz—So ingenue she thinks
“Danke schon” means “thanks, beautiful.”
Jim Smith—Ambition—to keep making
Mary merry—hold tight!
Percy Spencer—The modern Casonova—
Sweet Sue is big flame—bet he gets left
at the altar.
Dorothy Spread borough—Will Dorothy
ever catch up to Mr. Barnes as she
hastily copies down those Latin translations?
Louis Stcriofj—U. of T.—medicine, surgery
and research—will be a career man.—
One of the “Men in White.”
Jean Sutherland—business course—secretary.
She’s tall, dark, and terrific!
Renee Taillcfer—Varsity—marriage! We
just can’t see our little “Rage of Paris”
darning socks.
Ronald Taylor—Vic.—research biologist.
Ron wants to own some fair tropic isle
(sigh! sigh!) where he and a few other
scientists (of the Dorothy Lamour type,
no doubt) can be “alone”.
Viola Taylor—Trinity—librarian. Just another
bookworm!
Ophelia Tcghtsoonian—Ophie’s hobby is
talking—with gestures!
Ben Teichman—B. & M. Sciences—connoisseur
on pop—can tell difference between
coke and orange blindfolded.
George Tclfer—What happened to our shy,
blushing lad of a year ago?—Vic.—
languages—interpreter for Hedy Lamarr.
Frances Thom — Hospital nurse — her
greatest ambition is to slip into her seat
before Miss St. John can say, “You’re
late!”
Irene Thompson — Varsity — nurse — she
thinks cartilage is a city somewhere in
Africa.
Faith Tiller—No ambition—but Faith can
hope some lad will have Charity.
Dorothea Trotter—Normal School—teacher.
Does Dorothea know the difference
between a head-stand and a somersault?
Charles Janies Tulley—Next year—leaving;
ultimate objective—has left.
Marion Walton—Hospital—nurse. Maybe
Del Grande can write this better than
we.
Gladys Warren—Varsity. She wants to
travel and be shipwrecked; Ron to own
an island. Can there be any connection?
Ruth Weeks—Journalism — “Torch y”
Weeks.
Donna Weller—Normal School—teacher.
Her pet phrase (especially in Geometry)
is “I haven’t got my homework done-,
sir!”
Margaret Weston—Normal School—teacher.
She isn’t so strong and silent when
you get to know her!
Audrey Wilcox—“The Lady Vanishes!”
Stewart Willmot—S.P.S.—is’nt he heartwarming
in a blood-curdling sort of way?
Tom Wong—Aviation—just a “stay-athome”.
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THE MAGNET 1939
The sport schedule for 1938-1939 is
almost complete. We have tasted the delight
of victory and the sting of defeat.
Let us sum up in the words of the philosopher,
“It is not victory, which either
side may win by chance, but what ye do
with victory that weighs for or against you
in the eternal scales’7.
There is the little matter of school spirit.
Our student body—that’s you—made other
schools’ supporters look like a bunch of recluses.
You backed the rugby squads faithfully
and your ardent support of the
hockey teams has the rest of the city green
with envy. May the spirit you have exhibited
this year ever haunt the halls of
Jarvis, Amen!
One thing more—don’t confine yourself
to cheering someone else. Rugby, hockey,
swimming, track, tennis, and badminton—
there are- six targets for you to shoot at.
Find your sport and seek to excel. Get interested,
make the dust fly a bit; then, and
only then, will you receive the most out
of your school.
Now an orchid to the directors of our
sports programme. We give you—Mr. G.
Allan whose unbeaten bantam rugby team
was the one bright star in the Jarvis firmament
of this year and whose junior hockey
team went to the play-offs—Mr. Bowman
who did wonders with a gang of green
hands who aspired to play junior rugby
and is now coaching the best swimming
team Jarvis has ever had—Mr. Wright who
coached the senior rugby team and was
assisted by Mr. Peter, a regular guy. Mr.
Wright, a real live-wire, is a valuable man
to have in the school—Mr. Hill who coached
and fought for our senior hockey team—
Mr. Dyce who pounds track and field
knowledge into a mob of hopeful candidates—Mr.
Allin who has given freely of
his time that interform games may be
carried on and to whom the whole male
student body owes a tremendous vote of
thanks.
We want to add a word of thanks to
Mr. Blatchford, Mr. Holmes, and Mr.
Brokenshire for their co-operation in interform
games, and also to Mr. Steinhauer
for badminton privileges. This last has
been very popular and we’re strong for
bigger and better mixed activities in the
school.
Campbell, Sterioff, and Bell were the
organizers of the interform schedule. We
need more like them. May their successors
be as worthy.
SENIORS
Lcjt to Right ■
Back Row—SkeafF, Hurst, Domander, Weir,
Miller, Ruffle, H i c k 1 i n g, Goodrick,
Surphlis.
Middle Row—Slatter, Janetos, Gunn, Smith,
Daniels, Patterson, Kent.
Front Row—McGill, McBride, Thomas, Mc­
Cord, Moore, Harrold.
BANTAMS
Lcjt to Right:
Back Row—Deanne, Petrie, Shugg, Carolis,
Stevens, Grindley, Masters, West,
Silcox.
Middle Row—Burgess, Maybee, Hayes,
Haffey, Wilkins, Caterine, Shearer,
Cohen, Campbell, Mr. Allen (coach),
Dyer.
Front Row—Neal, Wade, Gall, Del Grande,
Upper, Johnson, Tobin.
JUNIORS
Lcjt to Right:
Back Row—Coulter, Farlow, Chris, Mc-
Kague, Leith, McCrory, Cole, Sutton.
Middle Row—Matthews, Kearie, Staples,
Roper, Oldershaw, Wilmott.
Front Row—Sterioff, Pickard, Johnston,
Brown, Burminn, Sinclair.

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86
THE MAGNET 1939
5€niOR RUGBY
It’s a grand day here at the Maple Leaf
Stadium and this afternoon of September
29 marks the opening of the season for
Jarvis. Lawrence Park is parading its first
senior squad and a hefty looking bunch
they are. You remember that day and the
day the boys swam around at Oakwood
Stadium, and the other days. That first
day the boys played a tie with Lawrence
Park and left the field with the score 6-6.
The rest of the season was a little hard to
take as the seniors buckled down to this
and that, and breezed easily through their
five-game schedule, rolling up a string of
impressive scores—7-0, 11-0, 15-0, and
24-0—for Northern Vocational, North Toronto,
Malvern, and Danforth Tech, respectively.
But remember that, in every
game except the one with Danforth Tech.,
the score was 1-0 or 0-0 at the half. Inexperience
and a lamentable scarcity of
subs had a lot to do with those scores. Also
there is always another year.
Let’s just look over the team that carried
Jarvis colours in senior rugby. We’ll begin
with the backfield and Bill Thomas (cocaptain)
a glutton for work who kicked,
caught, ran, tackled, and fought with the
best; Roy McCord (co-captain) who stands
out for his ground-gaining and sure tertiary
work; George Daniels and his flat feet—
correction—fleet feet; Jim Hickling who
turned in many a useful performance; and
Skeaff who, we think, should have tossed
the passes; Jimmy Smith and Bob Moore
called the plays, and able Doc. Weir, the
team’s genial battering-ram, was a world
of power.
In front of these were the line who may
have been green but always were trying.
At outsides were “Jitters” Janetos and Bill
Gunn—as fine a pair of ankle-clutchers
and pass-grabbers as you’d find anywhere.
When they weren’t on we had Jacob, Mc­
Gill, Darbyshire, and Slatter. At middle,
Miller and Ruffle turned in the neatest
performances. Harrold had plenty of the
old fight, and McBride—well, so as not to
be different, Mac ran out on the field after
the Norvoc game and rolled in the mud.
In the inside position were Domander and
Hurst, who are comers and, although a bit
raw just yet, should do in another year.
Surphlis aided at inside and middle, and
always turned in a good job; while Goodrich,
the team’s wit, now and then took an
inside job.
Big John Patterson, who has followed
Horace Greeley’s advice, held down the
centre post alternately with Al. Arnold, and
they both did a good job of it.
McCord and Thomas were voted the
most valuable players.
★
JUniOR RUGBY
Although terrifically handicapped for
lack of material, Mr. Bowman fielded a
junior squad that never quit trying and
that improved with each game. Their scores
were 14-1, 9-0, 8-0, and 7-5—with those
obnoxious rivals again—Lawrence Park,
Northern Vocational, North Toronto, and
Malvern respectively. The last game was
with Danforth Technical and our juniors
came through to win by a score of 7 to 6.
We have heard that more than one bantam
aided and abetted the juniors in this game,
and our hearts are heavy at such a state
of affairs. No doubt the juniors would have
been much better if they had turned out
consistently to practices.
Let’s look over the junior team. On the
line Coulter and Oldershaw take the
laurels. The former was chosen as an allstar
centre by the newspapers for his
steady line work; the latter, a really good
middle, gave the seniors a hand in their
last game. Cole, Staples, and McCrory
complete the quartet of middles. For some
reason or other Cole was dubbed the
“Three Minute Man”. Anyway, he was the
junior backstroke champion in ’37.
At outside wing the juniors had Red
Sinclair, Jack Farlow, Sutton, and Pete
Johnson. Red is a mighty smart outside
and we’re sorry he damaged his ankle this
Fall. Jack Farlow is a hard working lad,
Sutton did his job, and Pete is the best
badminton man in the school — hmmm!
At inside wing there were Wilmott, Pickard,
Brown, McKague, and Shilton. The first
four were newcomers to the game and
we’ll pat them on the back for trying.

JARVIS COLLEGIATE
Ralph Shilton played with the bantams in
’36 and so knew the ropes a bit better.
Behind the line Louie Sterioff, captain
and quarterback, is “a good guy”. More
about him later. Matthews, Leith, Kearie,
and Roper made up the half-back quartet.
Berman was about from time to time with
Chris, at flying wing.
Sterioff and Oldershaw were chosen the
two most valuable players.
★ •
87
who should make a mark in the football
world before they hang up their cleats.
Russ Upper and Sandy Gall were the cocaptains,
and a pair of future greats or we
miss our guess. The bantams selected them
as their most valuable players. Del Grande
was another back who consistently turned
in star performances, and Don Grindley,
Bill Wade, Ken. Wilkins, Pete Burgess, Joe
Haffey, and Alex. Campbell were a crew
that would go places in any league.
!
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BRrrmm rugby
Bantam rugby has made history for our
venerable alma mater. This is the first time
that Jarvis has turned out an undefeated
bantam team and the first time that a
Jarvis bantam squad has beaten a North
Toronto bantam team—and by the score
of 19-2! Nothing so warms the heart of a
coach as a full turn-out, and remember,
consistent turn-outs are our best means for
boosting sports in the school and keeping
the coaches interested. Those bantams
were the most willing bunch of workers
that Mr. Allen has seen for a long time.
And look what happened to them! They
ripped through their five games—well the
scores tell their own story . . . 10-0, 15-0,
19-2, 6-6, 7-6 .. . and all victories. Those
were the scores with Danforth Tech.,
Norvoc, North Toronto, Malvern, and
Riverdale, in that order. In the semi-final
they defeated Western Tech. 6-0 and, in
the final, blasted Malvern by a score of
7-0.
Now meet the boys. The line was good
and its pivot men were great. Earl Johnson
and Shugg were the centres. The former
displayed great form throughout the
season, but got careless once and let his
nose get slightly marred. At insides there
were Corolis, better known as “Offside
Gus”, Deanne, Hayes, Tobin, and Petrie.
The middles consisted of West, Neil, Maybee,
Cohen, and Masters. West and
Masters look like great prospects for next
year’s teams. The flanks were guarded by
Stevens, Caterine, Dyer, Silcox, Shearer,
and McNeal.
The backfield were a starry collection
★ :
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BADminTon
The Badminton Club enrolled fifty
members this year. This total is a fairly
sure indication of the popularity of this
sport. The boys are running off a doubles
and singles tournament in the school, and
have entered the interscholastic tournament.
For more about badminton see
“Girls’ Sports”.
inT€RFORm ACTIVITIES
Rugby Champs—2D.
★
Hockey—Schedule unfinished.
Basketball — 5C are Upper School
champs., and 2D are Lower School champs.
Incidentally, a pick-up Jarvis team defeated
the Normal School cagemen 32-20
on March 15.
Volleyball—5C and 3D are chief contenders
in the Upper School. 2D look like
the best bet in the Lower School.
Floor Hockey—The schedule is still in
its early stages.
A Jarvis team defeated Northern Vocational
9-3 on March 9. An interscholastic
league in this sport is in order.
Baseball—In the future. That energetic
triumvirate, Campbell, Sterioff, and Bell,
invite your attention to this sport.

THE MAGNET 1939
HOCKEY
JUNIORS
Left to Right:
Front Row—Dyer, Bee, HafTey, Gall, Wade, Rife (manager).
Back Row—Mr. Allen (coach), Breithaupt, Brugess, Smith, Upper, Russell.
SENIORS
Left to Right:
Front Row—Smith, Gunn, Thomas, McCord, Mr. Hill (coach).
Back Row—Duncan (manager), Wong, Weir, Appleton, Slatter.
senioR hockey
Somebody had a brain-storm when he
thought of holding those double-headers
at Varsity, and on Friday nights too. Not
only were the fans tickled pink, but the
players enjoyed it hugely. We hope that
some such programme will be arranged
next year. We were all pleased to see Mr.
Blatchford, Mr. Cook, Mr. Nelson, Mr.
Allin, Mr. Booth, and Mr. Muir attending
those games.
The seniors started off by holding North
Toronto to a 2-2 score. They won 3-1, 2-1,
and 5-1, over Norvoc, Central Tech., and
Lawrence Park, and lost 4-2 to Harbord.
The semi-finals found them mixing it with
Western Tech, (their conquerors in 1938)
in home and home games. The classy greenshirts
were a little too good for our
scrappers and won going away by scores
of 10-4 and 10-0. But those scores were
not, in any way, the fault of Doug. Appleton,
who guarded the twine in big league
style.
Here’s the team:
Goal—Appleton. Remember when Doug,
came out almost to the blue line to pick
up the loose puck and then waved- his
stick threateningly at the Tech, forwards
who were sailing in?
Defense—McCord, Simpson, Weir. Roy
was a boon to the team this year, Frank
is always dependable, and, more than once,
Weir saved the day for Jarvis.
Centre—Slatter and Heather. Slatter was
really anxious to have his picture taken
after the final, but, he got a tooth knocked
out in the closing seconds—no picture.
Heather and chemistry are just like that—.

ii
JARVIS COLLEGIATE
Right Wing—Wong, light on his feet
and on the ice; Thomas (captain),—“Now
look, you guys, we gotta win this game”.
Smith, of whom more later.
Left Wing—Gunn, reputed to have the
hardest shot on the team; Moore, well we
found a Tech, player peeved at Bobby;
Sutton.
Frank Simpson was voted the team’s
most valuable player.
★
juniOR HOCKey
It is too bad the juniors created that
nasty smell when only six out of fifteen
showed up to play an exhibition game. We
hope that doesn’t happen again.
The juniors started off with a bang by
defeating North Toronto 2-0. They lost to
Norvoc 2-1, tied 1-1 with Harbord, and
defeated Central Tech, and Lawrence Park
3-1 and 6-1, to take second place in the
final league standing. Another smart
Western Tech, squad put them out of
further contention by scores of 6-2 and
13-1.
The line-up for the juniors was:
Goal—Dix and Masters.
Defence—Hoover, Haffey, Farlow, Maybee,
and Burgess. Watch this fellow
Hoover, he’s going places!
Centres—Gall and Upper.
Left Wing—Bee and Wade.
Right Wing—Dyer and “Big Voice”
Smith.
89
Alternates—Breithaupt, Jefferies, and
Russell.
The juniors voted Hoover as their star
performer.
★
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BflnTAm Hocney !
Very few people heard anything about
this little squad. Al. Darbyshire organized
the boys and entered them in the “King
Clancy League”. They defaulted their first
game and were suspended because they had
no explanation. Now that the matter has
been cleared up and they are ready to reenter
the league, the juniors are finished
with interscholastic hockey and will push
out the bantams because they (the juniors)
are eligible for the King Clancy series.
“ISN’T HE PERFECT!”
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90
THE MAGNET 19)9
TRACK AnD FI6LD
TRACK and FIELD
Left to Right—Matthews, Brigham, Mr. Dvce (coach), Daniels.
We would like to see the track team
back in the limelight once more. It is
pleasing to note that the executive are
organizing a programme of meets with
other schools—e.g., the meet with Northern
Vocational here on March 9, in which our
lads showed a clean pair of heels to the
visitors. It is really about time that the •
track team had some such schedule for,
without plenty of meets, track work is
dull and colourless. We have a team entered
in the Ninety-First Highlander’s Meet
in Hamilton, where Norm. Slatter, George
Daniels, Matthews, Paskaloff, Nevin, and
Jardine are going to sport Jarvis colours.
The annual cross-country run has been
quite an attraction the last two or three
years. Perhaps the smart silver cup, which
goes to the winner, is the attraction. Sandy
McKillop galloped home an easy victor
last year, with Del Grande second. We
believe John will give Sandy more competition
this year.
MASTER BOWMAN
18—

JARVIS COLLEGIATE
siuimminG
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JUNIORS :
;
Left to Right:
Front Row—
Kostachuck, Walker,
Fenton, Wilkins.
Back Row—
Scott, Lindsay, Hayes,
Stevenson.
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INTERMEDIATES
Left to Right".
Front Row—
Del Grande, Cole, Cherrett.
Middle Row—
Fair, McFarlane, Campbell,
Switzer.
Back Row—
Breithaupt, Petrie, Mc-
Ivillop, Roper, Sharpe,
Britain.
SENIORS
Left to Right:
Front Row—
Melville, Rimmer, Rey.
Middle Row—
Griffith, Goodrich, Russell,
Arnold.
Back Row—
l, Ray, McCord, In-
1, Brace.
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The swimming team is an organization
that receives little publicity about the
school, yet does a great deal worth talking
about. Under Mr. Bowman’s direction
this team has been making a consistent
“noise” in interscholastic meets. We have
a “better than ever” group this year and,
though no one of our teams may win at
Hart House, we’re hoping to aggregate
more points among the three teams than
any other school. The teams are wellbalanced
and lack great individual stars.
That is why newcomers are always welcome
on the team, particularly juniors. If you
like swimming why not come down and
have a try for the team? On April 1st the
sectional meet will be run off at “we don’t
know where yet”, and, a few days later,
the finals wall take place at Hart House.
Here is a probable line-up:
Juniors—Hayes, Scott, Brien, Fenton,
Upper, Kostachuk, Wilkins, Lindsay.
Intermediates — Fair, Cole, Larking,
Breithaupt, Russell, McKillop, Cherrett,
Sharpe, Campbell, Roper, Switzer, Petrie.
Seniors — Rimmer, Sawyer, Goodrich,
Patterson, Gunn, Melville, Norman Rey,
Hickling, Ingram, Griffiths, Brace, Britain,
Arnold, McCord.
We expect Dick Goodrich will be diving.
Watch that foam, there’ll be a Jarvis
man in the frothiest of it!
MISTER BOWMAN
1939
THE MAGNET 1939
TH€ ATHL6TIC HALL OF
fame
Bill Gunn—'Luckily has plenty of studies
in which to recover from nights of heavy
homework. Bill played junior rugby in
’36 and senior in ’38, junior hockey in
’37 and senior in ’38 and ’39, swimming
in ’38 and ’39. He does it all on hamburgers
and hot dogs!
Bill Thomas—“Cattleboat” visited Blighty
last summer and can tell you all about
coins and sailors. He played junior rugby
in ’36 and senior in ’38, junior hockey
in ’36, prep hockey in ’37, senior in ’38
and ’39.
Roy McCord—“Lefty” stays slim by
wondering and worrying about his year.
The alliteration would be even more
perfect if we could include “working”,
but we can’t. He was the star back on
this year’s senior rugby squad, and we
thought he was the best man on the ice
in that final hockey game. ’36 junior and
’38 senior rugby; ’38 and ’39 senior
hockey, and ’37-8-9 swimming are his
marks.
Jim Janetos—Essentially a cageman (no
reference to the cartoon). “Jitters”
captained the ’35 and ’36 basketball
squads and led the 5C team to their interform
victory. He played ’35 junior
and ’38 senior rugby. His most dangerous
defect is a lack of appreciation for
good music (or are we crazy?).
Jim Smith—Another Barnum and Bailey.
President of the History Club, but wc
have yet to see him stand forth and
deliver an oration on the European “sitchation”.
When time drags, Jim manipulates
the quill for The Magnet, but don’t
ask him why. 1936 was his busy year—
junior basketball, soccer, and rugby; in
addition, ’35 basketball, ’38 senior rugby,
and ’39 senior hockey.
“Doc” Weir—Is no baby, but then why be
dainty in such a harsh world. Momentum,
and plenty of it, is his key to success
on the rugger field. The most astounding
revelation we could find was the fact
that in the huddles he used to weep and

JARVIS COLLEGIATE
plead for a chance to plunge when our
boys were losing. He played bantam
and junior rugby in ’36 and senior in
’38; ’37 junior, ’38 and ’39 senior hockey.
AL Darbyshire—Illness broke up Al’s ’38
hockey season, but we saw enough of
him to realize that he is a fine goalie.
He’s the chap who organized the bantam
hockey team this year, and got them a
berth in the King Clancy series. He played
’36 junior and ’38 senior rugby, and
’37-’38 senior hockey.
George Daniels—Isn’t included because he
can box, (did you go to the concert?),
but because he’s been one of Mercury’s
best pupils for some years now. We
couldn’t hope to present all his feats in
track and field work, but in the 1938
Annual School Games at the Exhibition
he took firsts in the senior 100-yard
sprint, broad jump, and hop, step and
jump. He played senior rugby this year,
also.
Doug. Appleton—Would have been playing
senior rugby last fall, but after going
through a season of bantam rugby in
’36 (he was captain along with Buckley),
and a busy season of hockey, both junior
and senior, in ’38, he broke the cartilage
(obnoxious word!) in his knee while
bowling one evening.
Louis Sterioff, “Soup” Campbell and Bob
Bell—This trio is mentioned for the fine
job they did, and are still doing, in
organizing interform activities. Both
Louis and “Soup” are great all-round
sportsmen, and Bell is no slouch either.
By the by, whenever in doubt, eat at
the Cafe Rendezvous. Louis always does.
John Del Grande—Magnus made a shining
debut in rugby on the bantam squad.
He’s one of the finest runners in the
school, and his general P.T. work is the
tops. He was wielding a billiard cue before
he was five, and can make an eight
ball do the Lambeth Walk. He owes all
this to his capacity for pop, celery, and
macaroni. Lads like John and Louis
make one wonder if a good big man can
always beat a good little man.
Upper, Gall, Campbell, Hoover, Dyer,
Bee, Slatter, Haffey, and a host of other
93
boys made themselves heard in the field
of sports, but they weren’t included in the
Hall because future Magnets will be able
to sing their praises, whereas most of the
lads mentioned are in their last school-year
and we want to give them a boost before
they leave us.
In closing may we leave this slogan with
you, which is a good one even though it
was stolen from an Enarco sign and we
are using bad grammar. Remember . . .
“We need fewer by-standers and more
stand-byers.”
Editor’s Note—Ted Sawyer, our sports
editor, deserves a word of praise too. He
has won his spurs as a hockey player and
a runner. He is the best swimmer in the
school, beyond doubt, having knocked out
a record of 25.4 seconds for fifty yards, free
style. And what a style—perfectly timed
strokes and powerful flutter-kick! Yeah,
Ted!
* *
Shirley: “Why do they cheer when a
fellow is hurt in a football game?”
Sandy Gall: “So you girls can’t hear
what he’s saying.”
Gunn: “I’m a little stiff from hockey.”
Thomas: “Where’d vou say you were
from?”
Mr. Bowman: “Have you taken a shower
bath?”
John Rimmcr: “No, sir, is one missing?”
Ernest Robinson: “Say, Bill, do you ever
do anything to support your school?”
Bill Ingram: “Oh, yes. Sometimes I
lean against it.”
*
Janetos; “It’s costing me a hundred a
month to live.”
Goodrich: “I wouldn’t pay it. It isn’t
worth it.”
Drug Clerk: “Have you forgotten what
you camphor?”
Customer: “That's it. What does it
sulphur?”
Ditto I: “I’ve never cinnamon so funny.”
Ditto II: “That’s all right, ammonia
novice.”
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94 THE MAGNET 1939
-A
GIRLS' SPORTS
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If we put as much energy into writing little heads is positively astounding. She
this sports column as the Jarvis gals do has a wonderful memory (especially about
in their P.T., we would have to submit a our dirty running shoes), and altogether
report the size of The Magnet about once she is O.K, with us. We hope she has enjoya
week. However, this is your humble ed being at Jarvis half as much as we
servant’s attempt to chronicle the ’38-’39 ( enjoyed having her.
sport season.
The following assignment leaves your
correspondent far astern. Who could possibly
put Miss Stinson and her marvelous
work at Jarvis on paper? Everyone knows
her dynamic personality, outstanding
ability and encouraging smile . . . anything
we may try to add would be purely anticlimax.
Here follow her own comments on her
work in New York:
★
SWIMMING TEAM
Left to Right:
Back Row—I. Hatton, J. Husband, C. Hatton,
J. McDougall.
Front Row—M. Staples, D. Horsfield, S.
Kates, A. Marshall, R. MacDonald.
BASKETBALL CHAMPS—5A
Left to Right:
“My course is intensely interesting . . . ^aC\)ou°gaiTR ^ee^Sj Riley, P. Mcterrifically
energetic (I’m still discovering
Front Row—F. Tiller, C. McMartin, B. Bell.
muscles I didn’t know I had before) . . .
D. Horsfield, Miss Little.
and an immense amount of really hardwork.
. . . We even have to practise after
classes in most everything to attain the
ARCHERY TEAM
perfection of performance that is expected
of us, . . .
“The Beauty Kit is a constant source of
pleasure and very much admired by my
friends here in the club. . . .
“I certainly will be able to give the Jarvis
girls a totally different course in gymastics
and dancing, that I think you will find
fascinating. . . .
“I know I haven’t told you much, if
anything, about my work here, etc., but I
could write a whole book on just one
month. /. .”
“Puhsonally,” we envy Columbia University
our “Stinnie”.
Meanwhile, Jarvis has the acme of all
substitutes, Miss Agnes Little. Petite and
beautiful, Miss Little has been our shining
star during the winter term. When we
realize her handicap in coming into a
strange school in the middle of the year,
the amount of basketball, dancing, etc.,
that she has managed to get into our thick
Left to Right:
Back Row—E. Cumberland, A. Upton, II.
Brien.
Front Row—C. McMartin, D. McCann.
VOLLEYBALL CHAMPS—4A
Left to Right:
Back Row—A. Hill, M. Wright, M. Emerson,
J. Caswell, P. Gibson.
Front Row—V. Woodyard, S. Kates, M.
McGilvery, It. Williams, E. Price, D.
Northcott.
BADMINTON TEAM
Left to Right:
Back Row—L. Riley, J. Winters, P. Mc­
Dougall.
Front Row—M. Bennett, H. Reid, A. Upton,
N. King, B. Bell.
BASKETBALL RUNNERS-UP—4C
Left to Right:
Back Row—B. McIntosh, M. Howitt, E.
Thompson, E. McDermott.
Front Row—M. McLean, J. Winters, A. Upton,
Miss Little.
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96 THE MAGNET 1939
OLLEYBALL occupied the
attention of Jarvis girls from
October 1st to January 17th.
at the cost of broken fingernails
and tousled hair. Upper
School and Lower School
participated in a tournament which, in
the language of sport, was a “whizz”.
Roberta McDonald, in charge of volleyball,
spent Tuesdays after school refereeing
all the games with the help of the
council members, and spent the rest of the
week recuperating from the strain. When
the smoke of battle cleared away, 4A was
found to be in possession of the school
championship, with a combined 5A-5B
team, the runner-up. Barring accidents,
that final was a joy to behold. Both sides
were on their toes, and the ball never
touched the ground (well scarcely ever).
The Lower School tourney was held
after the Christmas spirits had a chance to
wear off, and 2A came out victorious over
2C in the finals. Herewith follows a list of
the gals who had something on the ball:
Eleanor Price, Cicely Dymond, Jean
Sutherland, Evelyn Thompson, and Shirley
Griffiths.
Volleyball went out with a splurge on
January 17th. After the finals had all been
played, no one wanted to go home. So we
played, and played, and we would have
been playing yet if Mr. Oldfield hadn’t
shooed us out at 5.30.
0 FAR as we can see, the
only way the new “up hairdo”
has affected Jarvis girls,
is in the 5th form pool
period. At the beginning
everyone looks like a New
York fashion plate; at the end—nuff said.
During Miss Stinson’s absence, the girls
have had only one pool period a week,
which is used to work toward Life Saving
Awards, The zero hour for these Awards
comes in April, so get busy you swimmers!
Doris Horsfield, the swimming leader, has
set the pace by being one of the few girls
in the school to have her Silver Medal.
There are rumours that she is trying for
her Gold, too.
A few weeks ago, Miss Little look a
team of Jarvis mermaids to Oakwood Collegiate
to participate in a meet with Oakwood,
Northern Vocational and North Toronto
Collegiate. It was a grand meet; with
Jarvis (we blush to say this) in second
place. Need we say that the two things
which appealed to ns most were—a tenminute
free swim period for those participating
in the meet—and the refreshments.
We are hoping for a return meet in the
near future. And are we practising! Mr.
Bowman has given up all hope of our returning
his stop-watch.
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ATHLETIC COUNCIL
Left to Right:
Back Row—Elvira Bricker, Doris Ilorsfield, Jean Sutherland, Roberta MacDonald.
Front Row—Doreen McCann, Betty Bell, Peg. McDougall, Audrey Upton.

JARVIS COLLEGIATE
ENNIS has arrived again to
contend with the Orange
Crush truck and all the other
trucklets for the possession
of the Jarvis “back 50”. The
season at Jarvis begins officially
after Easter holidays, although we
really begin it long before that.
A few words about Betty Bell, our tennis
leader. Betty debutted last year in junior
tournament play by winning the Ottawa
and District Cup and being runner-up in
the Ontario Championship. The present
queen of the J.C.I. tennis heap, “youah
commentatah” predicts, has a very bright
future. The Lower School’s budding genius
is blonde Marjorie Smith, who will bear
watching.
The doubles final is Audrey Upton and
Joy Winters versus Betty Bell and Peg
McDougall.
Instruction for beginners will start after
Easter. Don’t mind their “lawfter” when
you first step out on the court . . . you,
too, can be like our Betty.
HE Upper School lunch hour
sees some strange things these
days. If you are lucky, you
may not find ping-pong balls
in your lunch, in your lap,
or under your feet, but
we believe you are singularly fortunate if
you can avoid getting your hair parted by
a sizzling drive. Not only at noon, but after
school, the lunch room is full of aspirants
to the school championships. Elvira Bricker,
who is in charge of all table tennis played
at Jarvis, has arranged a singles and
doubles tournament which is in full swing.
Watch out for Jean Ross, Betty Bell, and
Norma Bridson, you champ contenders!
Personally., we would like to see any one
who could beat our table tennis stars.
UDREY UPTON, leader of
badminton, gave us all the
bird last year and captured
the J.C.I. singles title. We
believe she will retain her
niche this year with ease. As
this goes to press, the Jarvis girls are kneedeep
in the annual singles and doubles
tournament. North Toronto Collegiate Bad-
97
minton Club invaded Jarvis a few weeks
ago, fourteen strong, and, literally and
metaphorically, took us to the cleaners. We
ended the day, losers by four games, and
full of refreshments, which were served in
the cafeteria.
However, the Jarvis honour was upheld
valiantly at a return match three weeks
later. This time, a team of eight permitted
no fooling and went to work in a masterly
fashion to pile up 124 points to North Toronto’s
83. Jarvis won every game! The
North Toronto gals certainly know how to
entertain. Table tennis, chocolate doughnuts
and chocolate milk scattered generously
through sessions of badminton, made
quite a rosy picture.
The Jarvis lasses have had an enjoyable
winter of mixed badminton with the lads.
Of which more anon.
HIS year mixed badminton
interested (and I mean interested)
about fifty Jarvis
girls and boys. The gals were
mostly 4th and 5th formers,
but the masculine section
contained everything from first formers
up—or should I say down? Mr. Steinhauer,
Jim Pickard and Audrey Upton
comprised a committee of three that put
us through our paces. The games went off
very smoothly and everyone had at least
three a night—Fred Francis to the contrary.
Mr. Steinhauer, immaculate in white
flannels, and Mr. Bowman in shorts (woo!
woo!) supplied the glamour for the club,
which was run on a first-here-first-servewoe-to-detentioners
basis. Our speed in
this matter augurs well for any future firedrills.
The following teams seemed to hit
it off fairly well together, and dished out
some pretty stiff competition to all comers:
McCrory and Eveleyn Lamb, Johnson
and Audrey Upton, Eckle and Betty Bell,
Griffiths and Norma King, Wilmott and
Milly Fraser, Shilton and Marg. Bennett.
The boys’ night, nets and birds were
used, and a small fee of ten cents was
collected from the girls to defray the cost
of said birds.
Getting us down there may have been
easy, but getting us to stop and go home
was a horse of a different colour, as Mr.
Steinhauer knows to his sorrow.
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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
99
and we expect every form to have at least
one team in the fight. It ought to be a close
struggle, with such all-stars as Alice Hill,
Norma King, Frances Thom, and Roberta
McDonald in the line-up.
If any of you lasses in Middle or Upper
School would like to coach a Lower School
team, please submit your name to the baseball
leader.
RCHIDS to Alice Marshall for
a really superlative br;^ststroke.
. . . We, too, think it a
pity that we were not allowed
to enter the Interschool Badminton
Tournament. Ah, well. . . Many thanks to
Miss Little. She says that she likes the
Jarvis uniforms better than any others in
the city. . . We are indebted to St. Joseph’s
for Lucille Riley. She is outstanding in
basketball, volleyball, badminton and table
tennis, and is one of the school’s finest
athletes. . . . Peggy Haig, Jacky Sprung
and Beatrice Daniels were three firstformers
who will soon make Jarvis sit up
and take notice. . . . Helen Reed, most outstanding
3rd former on the basketball
floor. . . . We sincerely hope there will be
bigger and better mixed activities in Jarvis
as time goes on. . . . Special orchids to Mrs.
Graham for playing “Rock It For Me”,
“The Umbrella Man” and “Deep Purple”.
. . . The cream of the 4th form basketball
crop—Eleanor Price, Mary MacLean, Betty
Nicklin, Marg. Bennett and Betty Mc­
Intosh. ... By the way, have you seen
3B’s new form dance? I don’t believe it
has a name as yet. . . . Speaking of 3B,
they boast one of the smoothest playing
trios in Jarvis basketball—Peggy Knox,
Jean Ross and Mary Mazaras. . .. Congrats
to Eileen Cumberland, who is going to be
a P.T. instructress. . . . Whatever became
of those badminton courts that were to be
laid out in the Aud? . . . The box of candy
awarded to the 5th form tumbling class
at the end of the month seems to cover a
lot of territory. . . . Doreen McCann,
Norma King, Phyll Edmondson and Renee
Taillefer share the honours in the Upper
School danqing classes. . . . Renee’s tango
is in a class by itself. . . . We would like
to take this opportunity to thank Miss
Little for giving her time after school in
order that we might play badminton and
basketball, . . . Mr. Steinhauer deserves
our best slice of praise for overseeing our
mixed badminton on Fridays. . . . We can t
say that we appreciate the harmony, comments,
etc., that drift into the 5th form
tumbling class (4th period Wednesdays. . .
We wish we could get it straightened out
with Mr. Bowman whose basketballs belong
to whom. . . . Congrats to Marion
Staples and May McKinney on some pretty
swell swimming at Oakwood a while back, .
. . We think all the Jarvis girls deserve a
pat on the back because their uniforms
have been looking especially good this past
term.
PEG. MacDOUGALL
So far no mention has been made of this
eminent young lady. But what sport is
there in which she is not interested and in
which she does not take an active part?
She is the leader of baseball on the Athletic
Council, is the star of 5A’s champion
basketball team, is a member of both the
interschool badminton and swimming
teams, and is one of the few girls who was
rewarded with an Honour “J” pin last year
for outstanding, all-round ability in sports.
In short, she is the ideal Girls’ Sports
Editor.
“Dearest, if I marry you, will you give
up smoking?”
“Yes, darling.”
“Will you give up drinking?”
“Yes, if you like.”
“Will you give up poker?”
“Yes.”
“That’s sweet of you! Now, let’s see ...
what else are you going to give up?”
“You!”
“I can’t make you out, said Doreen
McCann, “Sometimes you are so manly,
and at other times so effeminate.”
“Well, what do you expect?” Rundle
answered, “Half my ancestors were men
and the other half women.”
Teacher—“A boy who laughs loudly at
old, feeble jokes is probably of low intellect.”
Goodrick—“What if a teacher tells the
jokes?”
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Director—Mr. Wilkie
Pianst—Amy Rogers.
Sopranos lst’s—Peggy Bates, Helen Britain, Eleanor Cawker, Thelma Copeland,
Joan Cowan, Beatrice Daniels, Helen Henry, Patricia Huard, Betty Jarvis,
Wilma Lemon, Francis Love, Elizabeth Rogers, Inge Sommers, Jac.
Sprung, Eva Toth, Lois Wilson, Dorothy World, Helen Daruzak, Mildred
Russell, Ruth Holmes, Bernice Jardine.
2 nd’s—Norma Bruce, Selma Carman, Marg. Cawker, Joan Gouer, June Marshall,
Joyce Purvis, Gloria Smith, Kay Walt, Anne Thouvenot.
Altos—Marg. Ashmore, Eva Carman, Peggy Haig, Gladys Huard, Verna
McDonald, Shirley Jackes, Frances Kent, Dorothea Trotter.

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102
THE MAGNET 1939
J. C. L BOYS’ RTHLG1C flSSOCIflTIOn
President ...........
Social Convener
Membership ...........
Business Manager .
Secretary...............
Treasurer ..............
Assistant Secretary
Assistant Treasurer
Executive
Mr. A, Allin
Mr. Blatchford
...........Mr. Dyce
....... Mr. Hill
. Louis A. Sterioff
........Dan Ruffle
George E. Daniels
....... Bill Thomas
As the school year opened, the association
was determined to make this year
a great success. To start off, Mr. Dyce reported
just before Christmas that every
boy in attendance at that time was a
• member of the B.A.A., the first time in
Jarvis, Since the football season was on,
a great deal of rugby equipment was bought
for the rugby teams. An equipment room
has been established in the gymnasium and
it is gradually being filled with equipment.
When the football season was over, with
Jarvis capturing the bantam rugby honours,
hockey prevailed. Jarvis was represented
by two well-coached teams, senior and
junior, at Varsity Arena; and as this is being
written, the teams are preparing for
the play-off games. We take this opportunity
to thank the Jarvis supporters who
came out to the games and whose average
attendance of 400 for the five games of
the regular schedule, surpassed that of any
other school.
During the hockey season, the association
Secured through the efforts of Mr, Hill,
a hockey cushion in the yard; something
that had not been done before. This
cushion was used to the full extent by the
senior, junior and bantam hockey teams.
Interform hockey was also played on this
cushion.
Many successful tea dances were organized
by Mr. Blatchford and his committee.
The semi-formal evening dance held in the
school in March was the social event of
the year.
The financial standing this year is excellent,
the best in a number of years. It
seems that there will be a good surplus at
the end of the school year.
Under the supervision of Mr. A. Allin,
interform activities have been successfully
played. In the fall, rugby was played; then
during the winter, hockey, badminton,
basketball, and volleyball, and in spring,
baseball and tennis will be played.
An excellent constitution has been drawn
up to make the J.C.I.B.AA. more successful
in future years. The primary object of
this constitution which, it is expected, will
start to function at the beginning of the
next school year, is to promote athletics
in Jarvis to a greater extent.
The year 1938-39 has been a very
successful one for the association and with
a new constitution, and a good bank
balance, the future of the J.C.I.B.A.A.
looks very, very promising.
L. A. S.
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103
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Front Row—Jim Pickard, Ophelia Teightsoonian, Marion Jenkins—Pres., Betty
Bell, Mr. C. W. Booth.
Back Row—Ronald Taylor, Bernard Cowan, Sol. Littman.
Jan. 30, 1939—Visit to the broadcasting
studio of C.F.R.B.
Feb. 13, 1939—Parliamentary debate —
“Unemployment”.
Feb. 23, 1939—Debate presented at the
Institute for the Blind.
.
Oct. 31, 1938—Series of short debates.
Nov. 14, 1938—Quiz.
Nov. 28, 1938—Charade.
Jan. 16, 1939—Talk by Mr. Wright—“The
Magic of the East”.
$

104
THE MAGNET 1939
JARVIS HISTORY CLUB
Front Row—Jim Pickard, Faith Tiller, E. McDermott, Freda Gracie.
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Modern History—Elizabeth Boyd
Ancient History—Margaret Johnson
Canadian History—Robert Bell
British History—Edward Safarian
In all, it has been a most successful
year. Long live the History Club!
The History Club has met five times this
year, and five entertaining meetings have
been the result. The programmes have included
sing-songs, skits, Scott McBride’s
“School News”, and several speakers. At
one meeting, Mr. Rhodes addressed us on
“Conditions in Germany, Austria and
Russia”; at others, Mr. Carman Brace
showed movies on China, Mr. Wright and
Mr. McKerracher gave interesting accounts
of their trips taken last summer.
At Commencement, November 18, the
John I. Hutchinson Memorial Prizes were
awarded to the following:

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jnRvis science club
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Front Row—Fred Harris, Marg. Johnson, Dan Cavanagh, John Gale.
Back Row—Len. Jarvis, Mr. Muir, Rossen RouefT.
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Nov. 21, 1938—Dr. Hall—“Medical Research”,
Dec, 12, 1938—Dr. Leppard—“Radium”.
Jan. 30, 1939—Mr. Ness—“Petroleum”.
Feb. 27, 1939—Mr. Rolph—“Oil Drilling”.
March 6, 1939—Mr. Dudycha—Movies
of the manufacture of Pyrex glass.
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Oct. 13, 1938—Organization.
Oct. 24, 1938—Dr. Westman—“Industrial
Research”.
Nov. 3, 1938—L. Jarvis —“E 1 e c t i o n
Theory”.
J. Gal. -“Atomic Theory”.
Nov. 7, 1938—A. Rosenthal—“R a d i o
Circuits”.

THE MAGNET 1939
JfiRVIS CRfTKRR CLUB
Bill Thomas
Bob. Brown
Ron Taylor
Bob. Servos
Don D’Arcy.
Oct. 12, 1938—Appointment of officers.
Oct. 19, 1938—Development of films by
tank—(Mr. Moorhouse).
Oct. 26, 1938—Development of films by
hand—(Vice-Pres. Servos).
Movies by Mr. Moorhouse.
Nov. 30, 1938—Movies by Mr. Moorhouse.
Dec. 14, 1938—Talk on Snow Scenes, by
Mr. Moorhouse.
Jan. 11, 1939—Mr. Randolph Macdonald,
A.R.P.S., gave a talk to the club.
Jan. 18, 1939—Talk by Mr. Reed—Making
Giant Enlargements.
Talk by Vice-Pres. Servos—Colour
Photography.
Feb. 8, 1939—Coloured Movies, by Vice-
Pres. Servos.
Feb. IS, 1939—Making of Home Enlargements,
by Vice-Pres. Servos.
Feb. 22, 1939—Coloured Slides, by Vice-
Pres. Servos.

JARVIS COLLEGIATE
THA JARVIS
ORCHESTRA

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108
THE MAGNET 1939
TH£ JARVIS HI Y
Left to right—Bob Servos, Stew Will mot, Louis Ray, Don Rife.
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Hi Y is an organization of High School
youths formed by permission of the schor 1
authorities and the Y.M.C.A. for the
purpose of promoting higher ideals of
Christian fellowship, such as clean speech,
clean sports, clean thinking, and clean
living both in the school and in the community.
The Jarvis Hi Y is proud of the
privilege and aware of the responsibility
of being a part of such an organization.
Last spring the first Jarvis Hi Y Club
was organized, but due to the lateness of
the season it was possible to hold only a
few meetings before the closing of the
school year. However, a programme of
Vocational Guidance was adopted, as a
result of which several members obtained
positions, while others, acting upon the information
received, chose to continue their
studies in the particular sphere to which
they were best adapted.
This year the organizing of the club
took place early in the school year. Mr.
Steinhauer consented to act as staff
counsellor, and the election of officers
followed. A programme planned to promote
better understanding between boys and
girls was then adopted, and conducted at
the discussion meetings of the club which
are held twice monthly at the Central
Y.M.C.A. The club has now organized a
programme of Vocational Guidance in order
to give to the members some measure of
their own capabilities and also a knowledge
of the requirements for success in the
business or profession for which they are
best suited.
Although the Jarvis Hi Y does not
function in the school as a social organization,
yet its members are active workers
in all the clubs and social committees of
the school, striving at all times to promote
school spirit, to support extra curricular
activities and to maintain the purpose of
Hi Y.

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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
(Continued from page 61.)
We became acquainted with girls from
other schools and enjoyed ourselves by
comparing our school events and curricula.
The meeting came to a climax at a banquet
Saturday evening, when we had the pleasure
of hearing Miss A. Louise Burton, the
general secretary at the central YAV.C.A.,
who spoke on general requirements and
principles we should have to fit us for any
position.
T had the pleasure of working on the
committee which planned the convention
and I can say truthfully that I enjoyed
myself immensely. It is indeed a wonderful
experience.
GEO. REID
BARBER and HAIRDRESSER
Proprietor of
REID’S BARBER SHOP
WHERE
HAIRCUTTING IS AN ART
Your satisfaction is our ambition and
your patronage will be appreciated
417 Bloor St. E. MI. 0053
At Sherbourne St.
Miller Floral Supply
FLORISTS
334 LAUDER AVE.
KEnwood 7941
FLOWERS AND FLORAL DESIGNING
FOR ALL OCCASIONS
TO OUR NON-ADVERTISERS
(with all due apologies)
109
We don’t wanta buy yer products,
We don’t like yuh any more,
You’ll be sorry when yuh see us
Goin’ to some other store.
We don’t wanta buy yer note-books,
Soft drinks, pens, or scribbling pads,
We don't wanta trade at your store,
I f you don’t give us yer ads.
Ms * *
McCauley: “Can I borrow your bicycle?”
McCoy: “Why the formality?”
McCauley: “I couldn’t find it.”
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flDVGRTISinG STAFF

THE MAGNET 1939
\>>
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10 jXJiy'VW-^XiV*'
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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
HERE IS WHAT
the WELL DRESSED
"GRAD" is BUYING
... at EATON'S
m ■iggL
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/
Young fellows want clothes that are
correctly styled of smartly patterned
woollens . . . the parents want reliablity
and value. That is why they
BOTH agree on “Eatonia” Suits for
Grads! The new styles . . . new
fabrics . . . new patterns for
Spring, which are offered in the
“Eatonia” range should give you a
feeling of real ’self-satisfaction. Come
in . . . try a few on in front of our
mirror, they’re bound to win your
admiration. Two pairs of pleated
trousers with ZIP-A-FLY fronts.
Sizes 32 to 37, 4 piece suit.
gatonia Value 21.50
'/O'
“You Can't Beat gatOTlia
Foe Reliability and VALUE"
L'-'J
m i!®
am
i
mm
m BBS
i
For shirts, ties, socks,
pyjamas and other
furnishings that are
smart and new ... make
your selection from the
Grads’ Furnishings
Section.
' £A /
0
///
ft
Boys’ and Grads’ Department
Main Store - Second Floor
James and Albert Streets
*T. EATON CSUo
)

112 THE MAGNET 1939
ALTCGK/lPHir
S2 JAU&J.

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113
i
The Dionne Quintuplets
are
Drinking
"GOLDEN CREST"
MILK
Supplied by
TORONTO
KI. 6151

114
THE MAGNET 1939
uREGG jS&
COLLEGE ^
Six weeks Summer Session
July 17 to Aug. 25
Mornings only - Inexpensive
1200 BAY #
MIdway
at Bloor 1107
GET THE FUN
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{Continued from page 55.)
long after he had learned that a wife is
something you once cherished.
He might have been remembered as the
forgotten man, whom no one lauds, of
whom no one sings and who is never quoted
in Liberty or Esquire. But this article
spoils it for him.
Truth to tell, our hero was a failure—
not too complete however, for then he
might have been material for a tragedy.
He just lived.
❖
sfs *
LADY NIGHT
The changeful night is dressed as for a ball,
With twinkling stars to grace her slender
fingers.
And the moon, like a silver pendant,
To encircle the quadroon’s throat.
Suddenly, like Cinderella, falls from her
foot
A crystal slipper—’tis a falling star—
Then, at the break of dawn, her fleeting
loveliness
Is gone.
Joan Cowan, 1C
buy GOOD YEAR tires
On Easiest Terms
FROM
UPTOWN TIRE AND
BATTERY SERVICE
“EARL HOLMES”
Bay St. at Davenport
TORONTO'S LEADING CREDIT TIRE
HOUSE
RICHARDS’
FISH and CHIPS
We Feature Specials
for Students.
518 CHURCH ST. KI. 9124
at Maitland
324 DUNDAS ST. EAST MI. 0622
At Sherbourne

JARVIS COLLEGIATE
115
(Continued from page 52.)
is “Wally” McDonald, whose caricatures
appear in the Evening Telegram. He was
kind enough to draw some for this article.
Incidentally, his first caricature appeared
in The Magnet.
Your editor wishes to acknowledge the
able assistance of Miss Cynthia McMartin,
who in no small measure has helped in the
production of this column.
Girls be Thrifty - - -
Learn the Art of Knitting
at
Mary Weir’s Wool
Shop
The school year is swiftly drawing to a
close. Examinations are drawing near (too
near). Soon another graduating class
will be remembered only by the pictures
filed away in some dusty Magnet. Some
will go to college, others to business, and
thus before many years have rolled by,
Jarvis students of ’39 will be in the four
corners of the earth. Some will make of
themselves a success, others will not. If it
doesn’t hurt too much, let’s all ask ourselves
which we’ll be.
Personal Instructors
English Angoras
Beehive and Regent "Wools
Bouclettcs
783 YONGE STREET
1 Block Above Bloor
'
,
(Continued from page 40.)
c.
The “Aerial” or “Man on the Flying
Trapeze” is a turn to be used only in an
emergency, for it usually results in an
emergency case for the nearest doctor.
When you find yourself rapidly progressing
towards a tree, just hang yourself on a
horizontal branch about six or seven feet
from the ground and swing your feet
around in the air. If there are no suitable
branches or if the tree happens to be a
hawthorn, shut your eyes and hope for the
best.
The “Jelly Roll” is that figure performed
when the victim loses control of his skis
and rolls down the hill, often with disastrous
results. The place of jelly is taken
by snow which finds its way into every
crease and pocket available.
There is however, one great problem
which has baffled the experts for years —
what to do in the case of that embarrassing
position when you find one ski on each
side of a tree after rapidly descending a
hill. Any information concerning this
subject will be greatly appreciated by all
“Skiologists”. In the meantime I shall leave
it to you.
FLOWERS
For every Occasion
S.E. GROVE
jflorist
Flowers Telegraphed to
All Parts of the World
269 DANFORTH AVENUE
GErrard 4201 - 4078
i
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116 THE MAGNET 1939
SCHOOL SniCHGRS
I
Smith: “Say, these jokes you handed in
are terrible.”
Willmot: “Oh! I don’t know, I put some
of them in the furnace and it just roared.”
*
Mr. Cook: “Sorry class, 1 haven’t got
your papers marked.”
Bill Thomas: “Oh! that’s all right, Mr.
Cook, I haven’t got your Virgil done.”
Reid: “I’ve had no luck with that dame.
I've passed her every day this week and she
hasn’t smiled once.”
Littman: “Well, some women have no
sense of humour at all.”
*
Mr. Muir (in chemistry class): “Name
some liquid that doesn't freeze,”
Griffiths: “Hot water.”
*
Mr. Staples: “What happened after
Caesar mustered his army?”
Voice: “He peppered the enemy and look
the city by assault.”
Mr. S“Sit down, I’ll take no sauce
from you.”
* *
She: “You sure think you’re good looking,
don’t you?”
Smith: “No, but what’s my opinion
against that of hundreds of women?”
* * *
Humour Editor: “This is dedicated to
Philip.”
Editor: “Philip who?”
H. E.: “Fill up space.”
* * *
Percy Spencer had just sung a song of
his own composition to a music publisher.
“Well,” he demanded proudly, “what do
I get for it?” The listener slowly regained
his composure—“I’m a publisher, not a
magistrate,” he said at last regretfully.
Tcichman: “They say Gold is the
politest boy in the fifth.”
Ronsom: “Why, how’s that?”
Tcichman: “Yesterday in the street-car
he gave up his seat to three ladies.”
* *
Iieys: “I didn’t see you in church last
night.”
Taylor: “Guess not. I took up the collection.”
* * *
Mary: “Yes, the boy who’s taking me to
the dance is a very intellectual person.”
Joan: “Hmm, my new boy friend isn’t
so good-looking either.”
*
Father: “What do you mean by bringing
my daughter home at six in the morning?”
Ralph Shilton: “Well, sir, I have to be
at work at seven.”
* *
Mr. Muir: “Now, what did you learn
from that experiment?”
Heather: “Those beakers cost 50 cents
apiece.”
* * *
Mr. Jenkins: “Explain the binomial
theorem.”
Spencer: “Yes, sir, just what part don’t
you understand?”
* * *
New version of a funeral: “The body
lay surrounded by flowers, while friends
and relatives passed the beer.”
* *
Scott McBride: “Are you going anywhere
for supper Friday night?”
Shirley Dramond: “Why, no, Scott.”
Scott: “Gee, you’ll be awfully hungry
Saturday morning, won’t you?”

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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
117
UNIVERSITY OF TORONTO
UNIVERSITY COLLEGE
University College is the Provincial Arts College, maintained by the
Province of Ontario. It is non-denominational but not non-religious. There
are residences for men and for women. A spirit of unity and co-operation
pervades the whole college.
Substantial Bursaries are granted to able students who have difficulty in
bearing the total expense of a university education. Preference is given to
applicants from schools not situated in Toronto.
For information on residences, scholarships, entrance, choice of course,
and for a free copy of a beautifully illustrated descriptive booklet, write to
the Registrar, University College, University of Toronto, Toronto, Ontario.
:
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For information on courses in Arts, Medicine, Applied Science and Engineering.
Household Science. Education. Forestry, Music. Graduate Studies, Dentistry. Social Science.
Nursing, etc., write the Registrar of the University. For particulars regarding the Pass
Course for Teachers. Evening Classes, Summer Session, courses in Occupational Therapy, in
Physiotherapy, and in Aerial Navigation, write to the Director of University Extension.
IT’S A CRACKIN’ FINE BISCUIT FOR A
l
.
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Christie's Biscuits
0here's a Christie Biscuit for every taste
;

118
mORG SniCHGRS
THE MAGNET 1939
“Is there no hope, doctor?”
“Well, I don’t know. What are you hoping
for?”
* * *
An egotist is a man who insists on talking
about himself when you want to talk about
yourself.
* * *
Mr. Blatchjord: “I noticed you got up
and gave that lady your seat in the street
car the other day.”
Mr. Staples: “Since childhood I have respected
a woman with a strap in her hand.”
* *
“Hae ye been oot wi’ yon lassie again?”
“Aye, feyther,” replied young Angus.
“Why do ye look sae worried?”
“I was just wondering how much the
evening cost.”
“Nae mair than half a dollar, feyther.”
“Aye, that was nae sae much.”
“It was a’ Jean had,” said Angus.
* * *
I sneezed a sneeze into the air—
It fell to the ground; I knew not where.
But hard and cold were the looks of those
In whose vicinity I snoze.
* * *
Mr. Ferguson: “Have you ever heard of
Julius Caesar?”
Goldenthal: “Yes, sir.”
Mr. Ferguson: “What do you think he
would be doing now, if he were alive?”
Goldenthal: “Drawing an old age pension.”
* *
“Willmot, Spencer, and Packard put a
lot of feeling into their singing, don’t
they?”
“Yes, but it must be awful to feel that
way!”
* * *
Miss St. John: “You had a prose to prepare,
did you not?”
Marion Walton: “No, Miss St. John, I
was away when you told me.”
*
Mr. Sheppard: “Why did Mr. Chamberlain
carry his umbrella to Munich?”
Ophelia Teghtsoonian: “Well, it couldn’t
walk, could it?”
* * *
Mr. MacKcrrachcr: “Macintosh, tell me
the difference between perseverance and
obstinacy.”
Macintosh: “One is a strong will, and
the other a strong won’t.”
* * *
“Is the pleasure of the next dance to be
mine?” said the rather stout gentleman to
the “sweet young thing”.
“Entirely,” she replied.
* * *
“What’s repartee, Dad?”
“Repartee, my boy, is what a man thinks
of on the way home.”
* * *
Pat: “Who was that lady I saw you with
last night?”
Mike: “A convent girl.”
Pat: “Howzat?”
Mike: “Nun of this and nun of that.”
* * *
Willmot: “How come you don’t like the
girls?”
Pickard: “Oh, they’re too biased.”
Willmot: “Biased?”
Pickard: “Yes, it’s ‘bias this’ and ‘bias
that’ till I’m broke.”
* * *
Hoffberg was asked to paraphrase this
sentence: “He was bent on seeing her.”
He'wrote: “The sight of her doubled him
up.”
* * *
Joy Winters: “Why, it’s only six o’clock,
and I told you to come after supper.”
Appleton: “That’s what I came after.”
*
* *
Guest: “Ah, Mrs. Blank, I seldom get as
good a dinner as this.”
Little Johnny: “Neither do we.”

JARVIS COLLEGIATE 119
Corporal: “When you’re serving your
country, you ought to know better’n to
grumble because some dust was blown into
your food.”
Private: “I don’t mind serving my country,
but I’ll be hanged if I’ll eat it.”
* * *
The teacher wrote on the blackboard:
“Don’t light matches, remember the
Chicago fire.”
Fenton erased it, and wrote in its place:
“Don’t spit on the floor, remember the
Johnstown flood.”
Picture Framing
Curry’s Art Store
FRED L. CURRY - EST. 1911
760 Yonge St. KIngsdale 2838
2 Doors below the Uptown Theatre
ARTIST SUPPLIES
We know a funny story about a chicken
but we won’t pullet now.
* * *
Mr. Wilkie: “I’m going to give you this
violin.”
New member of the orchestra: “On the
level?”
Mr. Wilkie: “Yes, no strings to it.”
* * *
G-man: “Got away, has he? Did
guard all the exits?”
you
County constable: “Yes, but we think he
must have left by one of the entrances.”
Compliments of
BROWN’S BREAD
LIMITED
Exclusive Manufacturers of
OLD HOME PRODUCTS
TORONTO
GLadstone 1161
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GUNS
RUGBY
HOCKEY

120
THE MAGNET 1939
rYOUNG MAN!-YOUNG WOMANh
MAKE YOUR FUTURE SECURE
by supplementing your high school education NOW with an intensive Business
Course at Shaw Schools, and greatly enhance your opportunities for early employment
and future advancement. Shaw Business Courses lead to lucrative Secretarial,
Accounting and Business Administrative positions
The Shaw method of individual instruction enables each
DAY—NIGHT student to make progress according to his. or her, ability
and
and industrious application.
HOME STUDY A Free Employment Depart ment is maintained to assist
COURSES graduates in securing business posttions.
---------- 1 BOOKLET FREE ON REQUEST
Those U'ho are considering business careers, are invited to write, phone or call without
obligation for a free cop y of our interesting catalogue, “Up With the Times". It tells what
business offers, and expla ins courses, tuition rates and employment service.
12 DAY SCHOOLS IN TORONTO
Head Office, 1130 Bay St. KI 3165, 3166, 3167
107
SHAW BUSINESS SCHOOLS
RA. 2303
Winena flowers
413 BLOOR ST. EAST
At Sherbourne
WE SEND FLOWERS ANYWHERE IN
THE WORLD
WIANCKO BROS.
Mr. Clarke: “What do you expect Ernest
to be when he graduates?”
Mr. Birmann: “An old man.” 757 YONGE ST. - KI. 8202
* * *
McBride: “I call my car the ‘Ambrose
Small’.”
Finlay: “Why?”
McBride: “It’s been missing for years."
# * *
Steinberg: “It must be hard to drink
with a moustache.”
Stitt: “Yes, quite a strain.”
NOTE BOOKS - REFILLS
TEXT BOOKS
FOUNTAIN PENS
INK - PENCILS
ARTISTS’ SUPPLIES
There's Dancing
Every Evening at
THE ARCADIAN
and. Parties.
Special Rates for Students
For Information and Reservations Phone HA. 8988
.

JARVIS COLLEGIAT E 12 1
i Continued from page 56.)
away . On one of the temple walls is a small
depr ession int o which th e passers-by throw
stones. If the stone stays in they will have
good luck. 1 don't remember wheth er mine
stayed in or not.
T o. all these tenip les th e villagers come
in groups with bann ers and band s. After
paradi ng around, displayi ng the banners,
they burn incense and offer up the ashes.
After worship ping, one of the band s puts
on a "devil dance" . A dozen of them with
false faces sup port a long paper dragon
illumi nated, at night, all along its interior,
with candles. A large wire mesh-ball filled
with flamin g cha rcoal represents the sun .
It is frantically pursued by the dragon. As
you know, th e dragon is an old emblem of
China. The rising sun rep resents Japan .
How will it all turn out?
George Berna rd Shaw, ta ll and thin, is
an avowed vegeta rian. The late G. K .
Chester ton, who was very stout and strong,
loved meat. One day these two witty .
Englishmen met on the street. Said
Chesterton:
"To look at you, a person would think
there was a famine in E ngland."
"And to look at you," replied Shaw,
"he'd think you were the cause of it. "
*
*
Mr. Clarke : "T his is very unsati sfactory.
You have a verv low mark in Fr ench. I'm
not at all pleased with it. "
illelv ille : "1 told th e French teac her you
wouldn 't be, but he wouldn't alte r it. "
*
GOLD ~S
LAD IES' WEAR
316 Yonge St.
S. E. Corner Bay and Dundas
112 Dundas St. W .
BUYS COMPLETE
Air-Conditioned
ICE REFRIGERATION
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FOR DETAILS
KI NGSDALE 2178
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LIMITED
Percy Waters
FLOR IS T
•
445 Danforth A ve.
GE. 1125-6

122
THE MAGNET 1939
Collegiate Printing a Specialty
all)? Smpmal frpsH
Business and Society Printing
JOHN T. SHILTON, Manager
Phone: ELgin 9757
202 DALHOUSIE STREET, TORONTO 2
Wellesley Variety
Shoppe
P. SHNIFFER, Prop.
Anything you need in
SCHOOL SUPPLIES
We Have It.
The JAMES TEXTS
We have on hand all their Examination
Reprints. Model answers to examination
papers. Translation and
Keys for Latin, French and German.
Outlines of History.
Science Outlines and Helps.
Teachers’ and Students’ Notes and
Helps on the prescribed
Literature for 1939.
224 Wellesley St.
G634—MI dway—9657
Toronto
TIKOPHY-CIIAFT
LIMITED
Class Pins
Crests
Medals
Trophies
Prize Ribbons
102 LOMBARD AVE.
TORONTO
ELgin 0605
Write for Catalogue
I
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a complete line of supplies
your favorite sport.
YOUNG IN BUSINESS
W\ BUT OLD IN EXPERIENCE
We are making many friends who appreciate
QUALITY SERVICE
REASONABLE PRICES
Jack Watson Sporting Goods Co.
201 CHURCH ST.
WAvcrley 8896
TORONTO. ONT.
\

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JARVIS COLLEGIATE
123
FREEMAN’S
FORMAL
CLOTHES
Largest concern in
Toronto for the
rental of
FORMAL CLOTHES
for all occasions.
Three Stores to
Serve You.
59 Queen E.
EL. 2027
371 Yonge
KI. 3270
256 College
KI. 0991
Social and
Commercial
Stationery
Greeting Cards
for all Occasions
Students' Note Books
and Supplies
GRAND & TOY LIMITED
115 Yonge St. - at Adelaide
332 Bay St. - at Adelaide i
;
8-14 Wellington St. West
W
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POUNTNEY’S
DRUG STORE
You'll Enjoy !
ROLLING SKATING
EVERY EVENING
Supplies
WED. and SAT.
AFTERNOONS
;
AT THE
ARENA
466 SHERBOURNE STREET
RAndolph 2300
60 MUTUAL STREET
Special Rates for Parties.
Phone WA. 1554

In business, as in sport,
attention to detail, team-work
and skilled execution make
possible the winning of
victories. We invite you to
make use of our perfectly coordinated
team-work.
We'll Help You Score!
/ .
DVERTISERS EnGRnVlnG COmpnny .
171 JOHN STREET WAVERLEY 407.
. .