Sheep magazine Archive 2: issues 10-17

And none of them attempt to assess why thousands turn out to hear
Corbyn in town centres. They must be the only people in political history
to see huge crowds coming into the streets to support their party and
think “We’ll ban that lot for a start”.
22
So Owen Smith’s campaign insists he will continue with many of Corbyn’s
radical ideas but do it more competently. If you were cynical you might
wonder how strongly he backs Corbyn’s ideas, when the people backing
Smith most fervently are Peter Mandelson and Alastair Campbell, and
everyone else who hates everything Corbyn stands for. It is like standing
for the General Synod of the Anglican Church when your campaign
manager is Richard Dawkins.
The result is their campaign amounts to a series of unconnected
exasperated attempts to force him to stand down, by all resigning or
appealing to a High Court for the right to rig the vote, making them look
like Wile E Coyote chasing the Road Runner.
Next week, at a Corbyn rally, Stephen Kinnock will hide above him
waiting to drop an ACME piano, but the balcony he is on will collapse
and he will land on Laura Kuenssberg.
Then Tom Watson will try to shoot him through a hole in a tree, but the
gun will bend back through another hole and he will shoot himself in
the face, so he will issue a statement that this proves Corbyn must stand
down – he simply isn’t competent.
SHEEP IN THE ROAD : NUMBER 14