TELL April-May 2019

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{CHOOSE FREEDOM} Reverend Sam Zwarenstein One of the greatest benefits of being on a plane is that you’re uncontactable. No-one can get hold of you, you’re free to watch some tv or a recent movie release or perhaps a classic. <strong>May</strong>be you like spending some time listening to music or reading a book. And even though you’re in a somewhat confined space, you are generally free to “roam about the cabin” - just remember to fasten your seatbelt when you’re back in your seat. This is your time to do what you want to do-your time to make your own decisions without something or someone telling you what to do. Then, in 2008, commercial flights started offering in-flight wifi on domestic flights in the USA and in some other parts of the world, and the short-haul or domestic flight slowly became yet another place you could carry on with work or engage in other critical activities, such as Facebook or Twitter. I remember discovering this innovative feature in late 2011, and I will admit to using it on a couple of occasions, especially when I had several flights or connections on the same day. The ability to get work done, answer a few e-mails, perhaps do some internet banking, a bit of online shopping, message a few friends and catch up on the news, is a very good use of time, especially all the way up there in the sky. However, there went my time alone; my time of uncontactable peace. I had to waiver this time alone and justify that when you take into account the amount of time you’ll be saving when you get to your destination, whether it be home, a hotel, a conference or a meeting, you appreciate the convenience even more, perhaps because of the time you get back, perhaps because you used the time productively, 14 perhaps both. I acknowledge this is certainly useful on short-haul or domestic flights, especially when you are travelling for work. However, I have a problem with the idea of wifi when it comes to longhaul flights. For me, the long-haul flight is one of the last bastions of separation from the rest of the world. Unless you’re flying with a seriously low-cost airline, there is plenty to watch and listen to, and of course you can get really stuck into a good book, or perhaps even get some shuteye (acknowledging that sleeping on a plane is a varied experience). Recently, on a trip back from the USA, during the regular announcements after take-off, the cabin manager mentioned that the aircraft we were travelling on had onboard wifi, and that we could find instructions on how to connect on the screen in front of us. My plans to catch up on some sleep and to watch at least two of the movies that I never had a chance to catch at the cinemas, were overtaken by the urge to connect to the world out there. Despite the temptation, I left well alone. Why are we compelled to further submit ourselves to work and whatever is happening in the world, as though our lives wouldn’t have any meaning if we didn’t? Why can’t we bring ourselves to use the best excuse available for not being contactable, and allow ourselves some (relative) peace and quiet? This year, our journey as parents entered a whole new chapter - that’s the beauty of children, especially those in their teenage years. Rachel turned 16 in January, and she passed (as was expected) her driver knowledge test - she is officially a learner driver. All the parents who have been in our position are either laughing as they read this, or alternatively, this has reawakened some testing memories. This of course has meant that we are no longer serving only as taxi drivers/shleppers, but also driving supervisors. For all those not in the know, this role has a number of responsibilities
attached to it that make it different from simply being a passenger. One of the rules as a supervisor is that you cannot touch your mobile phone, just as the driver cannot. You have to act in the same manner as if you were the learner driver, not a passenger. So, as soon as the session begins, the phone goes into a pocket or the cubby hole, and being the conscientious person that she is, Rachel even activates “do not disturb” on her phone. For the length of the drive, you are uncontactable, allowing you to focus all your attention on the tasks at hand. Our natural instincts are to see this as an unnecessary restriction, an impediment. We are so obsessed with what we believe our rights are, that we cannot see the rationale behind this curtailment. By not having the distraction of the phone ringing and beeping and making all sorts of other noises, we can focus on helping the student in their quest to become a better driver, by learning from our years of experience in the driver’s seat. In effect, we have been given a freedom from our “captor”, which has allowed us to take on other tasks with a different perspective and a renewed sense of how we can apply ourselves in a different situation. We find that we have released ourselves from that which constrained us, and suddenly we are free to do so many other things, because we’re not distracted by (in this case) the phone. We can direct our attention to where it is needed. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not having a go at the poor mobile phone. I’m not saying it has taken control of our lives (even though there’s a strong argument in support of that theory). What I am saying is that we don’t allow ourselves to be removed from the madness and interference. We don’t have the discipline to ignore the distraction, so it’s only when we’re forced to ignore it or leave it alone, that we do so. On a plane, especially on those long-haul flights, we can’t use our phones as we normally would, so it’s almost as if we’re forced to allow ourselves freedom from that constraint. We occupy ourselves with other activities like reading or catching up on the latest visual or audio offerings. Similarly, when driving (or supervising a learner driver), we accept that our focus has to be on the road and what’s happening around us. Once again, we are almost forced into acknowledging that there is a choice. Of course, the world we live in is changing all the time, and we become more reliant on technology each time there’s a new development. We cannot, nor should we, ignore progress in the hope that we can allow ourselves the freedom that we don’t demand, but that allows us to take a break from what has become routine. In both examples I’ve given, we’re forced into allowing ourselves that freedom. Are we, therefore, incapable of taking that leap ourselves? Do we lack the discipline to proactively give ourselves an alternative even when we don’t need to? Optimistically, I’d say that we are both capable of taking the leap, as well proactively giving ourselves an alternative. We don’t throw a temper tantrum (well most of us don’t!) when the cabin manager or one of the stewards tells us to switch off our phones or put them in “airplane mode”. Therefore, we are able to take that break, we can accept that we need to take that break. What most of us lack is not necessarily the discipline to do so, but perhaps the capability to allow ourselves that choice. It’s not just about wifi on planes, or using your phone in the car. It’s about the many situations we find ourselves in without the apparent motivation to do things differently, to give ourselves the ability to choose our opportunities for freedom, and to do so when we feel we need to. We are quite capable of taking steps to control many other aspects of our life, so what is it that’s missing from this equation? TRANSFORMATIVE LEARING Just as in many other aspects of our life, we’ll look back one day and reflect on the opportunities we had, and the decisions we made. Inevitably there will be some regrets about the decisions we made. There will also be regrets about decisions we didn’t make and chances we didn’t take. We’ll reminisce about what could have been, if only we’d given ourselves the opportunity to make choices that were better for us, although they may not have been as convenient. We’ve all heard the saying; “Today is the first day of the rest of your life”. The question is, what are we going to do about it? Let’s find the strength and perhaps even the audacity to make this day, the day we start exercising our rights and choose freedom. Freedom to do what’s best for us, freedom to say no or to say yes, freedom to not be afraid of looking out for number one. Freedom to actually switch off from the rest of the world - give it a try! 15
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TELL April-May 2019

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