COMIC ARITHMETIC
Arithmetic is the art or science of computing bj numbers. It is national, political, military, and commercial. It is of the highest importance to the community ; because it pre-eminently teaches us to take care of Number I. Our ministers succeed according to their knowledge of the science of numbers. Witness the skilful management of majorities of the lower house. He who understands the true art of Addition, Subtraction, Multiplication^ and Division, as here laid down, will not be considered a mere cipher in tlie world; but will, in all probability, make a considerable /^wre ; and in the figurative words of Horace, be "Dives agris dives positis in foenore nummis." Let us, therefore, under the guidance and protection of that god of honest men, the light-heeled and light-fingered Mercury, be diligent so to add to our store by subtracting from the stores of others, that we may add to our importance. Let us so multiply our resources, by encouraging dimsion among our contemporaries, that we may see their reduction in the perfection of our own practice.
Arithmetic is the art or science of computing
bj numbers. It is national, political, military,
and commercial. It is of the highest importance
to the community ; because it pre-eminently
teaches us to take care of Number I. Our ministers
succeed according to their knowledge of the
science of numbers. Witness the skilful management
of majorities of the lower house.
He who understands the true art of Addition,
Subtraction, Multiplication^ and Division, as here
laid down, will not be considered a mere cipher in
tlie world; but will, in all probability, make a
considerable /^wre ; and in the figurative words of
Horace, be "Dives agris dives positis in foenore
nummis."
Let us, therefore, under the guidance and protection
of that god of honest men, the light-heeled
and light-fingered Mercury, be diligent so to add
to our store by subtracting from the stores of
others, that we may add to our importance. Let
us so multiply our resources, by encouraging dimsion
among our contemporaries, that we may see
their reduction in the perfection of our own practice.
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PRACTICE. 103<br />
of pollution,*' " a mass of corruption," " a cesspool,"<br />
" a common sewer,*' " a worm," " a scorpion,"<br />
" a snake," " a spider," " an adder." He may also<br />
charge himself with murder, abomination, witchcraft,<br />
lying, and every vice denounced in the<br />
Decalogue, on the principle of " the greater the<br />
sinner the greater the saint."<br />
Having thus initiated himself into<br />
the spiritual<br />
fraternity, he may write a work to prove that<br />
the " Church damns more souls than she saves."*<br />
He then mounts the rostrum as a burning and a<br />
shining light He deals in brimstone, wholesale,<br />
retail, and for exportation. Now he unites his<br />
spiritual with secular power, and mixes parliamentary<br />
logic with divinity, electioneering squibs with<br />
" Hymns of the Chosen ;" makes Lucifer cuckold,<br />
and swears himself his true liege man on the<br />
cross-buttock of a radical candidate. He now<br />
receives the degree of D.D. from a Scotch university,<br />
for 1L 13& 6
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