#4 Jan '19

If you feel up to it, feel free
to turn this into a laughing
matter for you two.
Over-Exaggerate their facial
and bodily manners. If they
are whining, you go ahead
and whine but whine louder
and sound really silly.
A great piece of parenting
secret is to follow the
laughter. The more smiles
and laughter that are known
to a child, the better it will be
for them and the
relationship between you
two!
St ep 4: NOW go ahead and
redirect t heir energy
:)
?I see you?re so upset right
now. I am going to help you
calm down. Would you draw
for me a picture that shows
how mad you are.
-or-
?I see you?re so upset right
now.
Together we are going to do
some angry push-ups and
get ourselves so strong and
tough!?
(this one works great for us
boys, obviously) ;)
(WARNING: t he previous
st eps m ight fizzle out t he
t ant rum so t here m ight not
be any need for st ep 5)
St ep 5: Reassure your child.
Let t hem know your Love is
NEVER on t he line.
?You get as angry as you want,
sweetie, nothing you do will
ever make me love you less.
You have all of my love forever.
You know that right? (wait for
the nod) Good. Let?s take a
break and since you?re such a
good problem solver,
you tell me what you could have
done instead.?
No matter what happened in
Step 4, whether you are still
riding out the emotion together
or not, always reminding your
child on where he stands with
acceptance of your Love is
ALWAYS a good idea.
Remember, it?s just emotions
and she just doesn?t understand
them yet. She needs help
getting guidance and she is
calling to YOU for that help.
Just as you were there for your
best friend when she got her
heart broke. It?s the same level
of pain, fear, frustration, and
not-knowing going on with your
24
Little one.
You?ll do the right thing, I know how
wonderful and great you are! :)
Now , before you leave m e?
? rem em ber, one of the biggest
takeaways you can have from
today?s learning experience about
tantrums, Mom, is that they are a
result of an EMOTION.
The behavioral, physical
manifestation of something they
are experiencing on the inside.
It?s important that you pass onto
them that they aren?t wrong for
feeling the emotion. If they start
feeling that?s wrong to be angry and
they start bottling up that emotion
because it has led to behavior that
led to pain given to them by you?
? bottling up emotions and not
letting those emotions get felt --
has negative consequences all
throughout the rest of their life.
So it?s great of you to establish that
healthy habit of accepting the
emotions as they come.
Loving the emotion of laughter,
because it?s a behavioral
manifestation of joy and happiness,
just as much as meltdowns as a