Get Out! GAY Magazine – Issue 395 November 28, 2018

BY IAN-MICHAEL BERGERON
@ianmichaelinwonderland
Landslide
One weekend, while the
weather was still warm, GF
convinced Southern Belle C
and me to go hiking.
I wouldn’t exactly describe
myself as an “outdoorsy
type.” While some prefer
glamping to camping, I
prefer staying home to
both.
But GF had wanted to go
hiking for his birthday—the
same birthday his boyfriend
broke up with him, so he
canceled. It was never a
question of if I’d go, the
question was: Do I ask if my
boyfriend J can come?
“You’re on your own here,”
Southern Belle C texted
me in a private chat. “My
boyfriend will be working
all weekend. I’ll ask if I can
bring my dog?”
GF had been doing well
since the breakup, but it
had only been a few weeks,
and I didn’t want to ruin his
plans if he wanted a boy’s
weekend. However, before I
could ask, he texted us: “I’m
bringing someone, I hope
that’s OK!”
Not some friend, someone.
“I’ll bring J too,” I
messaged.
They were the last to show
up: Southern Belle
C rented the car and
showed up at my
apartment, his dog in
the front seat next to him.
GF lived a few blocks away:
We saw them coming in the
distance.
B
“He’s too tall for GF,” I
judged immediately, before
they were within earshot.
“Do you think it’s a date?”
“It has to be.”
They approached: Feeling
protective, I couldn’t help
but already think this boy
wasn’t good enough for GF,
before he’d even said hello.
“Hello,” he said. “Could I
run upstairs and use your
bathroom before we go?”
Already using me for things.
GF, The Hiking Boy and I all
went upstairs. “You don’t
have to be nice to him,” GF
told me while he peed.
“I’m always nice,” I lied. “Is
it a date?”
“I think so.”
We drove upstate: Hiking
Boy had great taste in
music, and I took down the
names of several artists I
hadn’t heard before, but his
conversational skills were
lost amongst our inside
jokes and reminiscent
stories.
The hike was much the
same: We got to the
top of the mountain and
took a break. Head in my
boyfriend’s lap, I wondered
the best way to support GF
post-breakup. We take our
friends out to bars for drunk
one-night stands, but when
they bring someone around
we insist they aren’t good
enough for them. We push
them forward before they’re
ready, and sometimes hold
them back when they are.
We climbed a mountain,
and we turned around. On
the way home, we dropped
off Hiking Boy and GF
first. “Think we’ll see them
again?” I asked J in the
backseat, holding his hand.
“If we do, you’ll play nice,”
Southern Belle C scolded
from the front. And so, from
the backseat, I decided to
take a backseat in GF’s love
life. If he needs me, or my
advice, or to go camping, or
for me to “not be nice,” I’ll
be here.
PHOTO CREDIT STEVE BRENNAN

BY EILEEN SHAPIRO
CELEBRITY CORRESPONDENT
Bar d’O 25 Year
Anniversary
Bar d’O TO CELEBRATE WITH SHERRY
VINE, JOEY ARIAS AND RAVEN O
DECEMBER 16 AT INDOCHINE RESTAURANT
On Sunday, December 16, one of the most outstanding
extravaganzas will take place at the glamorous Indochine
Restaurant, marking the 25th anniversary of Bar d’O with
original hosts, world-famous queen Sherry Vine, Joey Arias
and Raven O. The celebration is a tribute to a party started
25 years ago with queens who performed with their own
voices as opposed to lip-syncing, rare in those days.
The house will be inundated with special world-renowned
guests including Porsche, Shequida, Flotilla DeBarge and
Bianca Leigh. Sounds to me like a life-altering event in the
best possible way! See you there.
Congratulations on your 25th
anniversary. What will be going on?
It is a 25-year anniversary of Bar d’O,
which you know is a big and famous
party that we did in the ‘90s with me,
Joey Arias and Raven O. It started
25 years ago, so that would be 1993,
and went until about 2003 or 2004.
Every year in December we have
done an anniversary party, so this is
the 14th year of doing that. But this
year it’s actually a big celebration—
it’s the silver anniversary, 25 years.
When we started that, it was still rare
to see live singing drag queens in
New York City. I mean, we certainly
didn’t invent that. Queens used to
sing live, actually, in the ‘40s and ‘50s.
Then it switched to lip-syncing, and
now it’s kind of coming back.
Yes, that’s definitely true. So what
will your audience be treated to?
It’s a rare opportunity to see the
three of us, the originals, all together.
Drag-Asaurus Park! Back together,
because sometimes Raven is away,
or Joey is away or I am away. This is
a rare opportunity to see the three of
us there all together. It’s at Indochine
Restaurant, which will make it a little
glamorous. And, we have a ton of
special guests—we have Shequida,
Flotilla DeBarge, Bianca Leigh,
Porsche—so it should be really, really
funny.

PHOTO CREDIT WILSONMODELS
When is this happening?
That is Sunday, December 16.
That is going to be an epic party.
OMG, it really is. It’s something I
look forward to all year, and I really
wanted to make this year special
for 25. I’m so excited. There is a
possibility Lady Bunny will make an
appearance, but that’s only if she’s in
town.
This sounds like the party of the
century. All that talent in one
room.
It is. The tables are already sold out.
There is definitely room at the bar,
there is standing room and there is a
lounge area, and we stuff people in
it. This is the earliest that it ever sold
out. So it’s like, wow! People can call
the restaurant and make reservations
for the expedited guest list, which
means they don’t have to wait on
line.

BY SHERRY VINE
Bar d’O 25 Year
Anniversary
Bar d’O TO CELEBRATE WITH SHERRY
VINE, JOEY ARIAS AND RAVEN O
DECEMBER 16 AT INDOCHINE RESTAURANT
How did Bar d’O start?
Joey: Jean Marc approached
me and told me he bought a
little bar and wanted to do
“something.” I went there
with Raven; we looked at
this little tiny bar and said,
“Let’s do it!” Edwige was
with us originally, and then
very soon Sherry joined the
team.
Raven: Exactly! In less than 10
minutes we said yes to him. Yes,
we can and will do it.
Do you have a favorite memory
or something that stands out in
your mind?
Joey: Yes, one moment I’ll always
remember. I pulled this guy on
stage because it was his birthday
and said, “If I could grant you
one wish, what would it be?” And
he said, “To have Liv Tyler sing
‘Happy Birthday’ to me.”
This was around the time “Lord
of the Rings” had just come
out. He didn’t know that she
was sitting at the bar. I told him
to close his eyes, and Liv came
over and sang “Happy Birthday”
in Elfin! He freaked out and was
crying. I loved that kind of magic.
Raven: The show after 9/11. It
was packed and just surreal. We
did our usual shit—didn’t sensor,
didn’t edit jokes, and it was a
magical healing night of music,
humor and love.
PHOTO CREDIT WILSONMODELS

Oh, and sex and blow jobs
in the bathroom!
What are you looking
forward to at the 25-year
anniversary party?
Joey: Unity and love
and exploration of the
magic that we produced
without thinking about it.
Celebrating 25 years of
magic!
Raven: Being with Joey and
Sherry again. Edwige, Sade
and Cashetta are gone, so
this is very special.

Cover: Bar d’O - Joey Arias, Raven O, Sherry Vine
Cover Photo Credit: WILSONMODELS
ISSUE 396 - DECEMBER 5 2018
Cover: Jordan Wheeler
Cover Photo Credit: WILSONMODELS
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IAN-MICHAEL BERGERON
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BY EILEEN SHAPIRO
CELEBRITY CORRESPONDENT
CYNDI LAUPER
“Home For The Holidays”
Once again superstar and icon, Cyndi Lauper will be
presenting her “Home For The Holidays” extravaganza,
a benefit for the homeless LGBTQ youths. Hosted by
Carson Kressley, at The Beacon Theatre in NYC, on
December 8th, Cyndi will be doing this for the 8th
year in a row on behalf of the “True Colors Fund”. This
year’s guests include: Amanda Palmer, Angie Stone,
BeBe Rexha, Dr. Elmo, Bishop Briggs, Natalie Merchant,
Regina Spektor, and many others.
I shared questions and answers with Cyndi regarding
this year’s accomplishments, the progress regarding the
LGBTQ youth homelessness, the show itself, and Ms.
Lauper’s future project....
Once again it time for
“Home For the Holidays”,
what accomplishments do
you hope to have happen
in the coming year with
the help of True Colors
Fund?
A lot of progress has
been made over the
past few years to prevent
and end LGBTQ youth
homelessness, but we still
have a ways to go to ensure
that no young person is
homeless again due to
their sexual orientation
or gender identity. Next
year, the True Colors
Fund will be undertaking
the biggest expansion
of our work to date. We
will be increasing the
numbers of communities
and homelessness service
providers we will provide
free training and education
to to ensure that every
young person in need has
access to safe, inclusive
and welcoming care. We
will continue to work in
Washington D.C. and
in state capitols across
the country to push for
the necessary funding
and policies. And, most
importantly, we are going
to be collaborating with
our incredible group of
young leaders who have
experienced homelessness
to develop and implement
the solutions that are
needed to finally bring an
end to this problem.
What is most exciting to
you regarding this year’s
show at the Beacon?
That the event is next
weekend. This marks
our 8th year. We are in
rehearsals now and show
is going to be great again
this year. Carson Kressley
is our show’s host of
course. Joing us this year is
Bebe Rexha, A$AP Rocky,
Amanda Palmer, Angie
Stone, Bishop Briggs,
Charlie Musselwhite, Gina
Yashere, Natalie Merchant,
Regina Spektor, Robert
Glasper, Sara Ramirez, Dr
Elmo, Shea Diamond,The
Knocks.

PHOTO CREDIT AMBER STERLING
Great line up and tickets
are still available some
come join us! Have a
great night and help
those in need this
holiday season. A win/
win.
Was there a particular
instance that inspired
you originally to
facilitate “Home For
the Holidays” ?
Home for the Holidays
was born out of the True
Colors Tour, which we
did during the summers
of 2007 and 2008. We
traveled America raising
awareness about equality
and over $250,000 for
LGBTQ organizations.
The tour also was the
impetus behind starting
the True Colors Fund ten
years ago. We wanted
to bring the energy and
impact of the tour into
our work to prevent
and end LGBTQ youth
homelessness, so we
started Home for the
Holidays to ensure that
the organization had the
resources it needed to
do its vital work. I can’t
believe this will be our
eighth year doing the
concert, it is going to be
a great way to celebrate
the True Colors Fund’s
10th anniversary.
Without becoming to
political has this past
year been harder than
most to accomplish
your goals?
I think that this past
year has been hard for
so many people for a
number of reasons and
politics certainly have
played a role. But, at the
same time, people are
mobilizing and letting
their voices be heard
louder then they have in
a long time. Whether it
be #MeToo and Time’s
Up or ensuring that
every young person in
our country has a home,
people are standing
up and say enough
is enough. That has
inspired me and it has
inspired so many others
to work together to
ensure our country lives
up to its founding ideals.
Aside from True Colors
and Home For the
Holidays”, you’ve had
a busy year. Are there
any new projects that
you care to discuss on
the horizon?
Most of 2019 will be
dedicated to finishing
the songs for Working
Girl I am also writing
songs for two big
animated projects that I
can’t talk about just yet,
I am going to Japan in
March for some shows
there, so its going to be
a busy year.

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THOMAS
TALKS
ABOUT: SMELL YOUR
Scent is experienced
via the olfactory bulb.
It is connected to
the amygdala (part
of the brain used for
processing emotions)
and the hippocampus
(associative learning).
Due to conditioned
responses, we often
attach a scent to an
emotion we’re feeling
when we smell it; then,
anytime we smell
the same scent, we
experience the same
feeling. This is one of
the reasons scents can
bring back old memories
or emotions you thought
were buried.
My apartment still
smells like my ex, and
I can’t get it to go
away. He moved out
two months ago. I’ve
washed everything;
none of his clothing
is still here, but
when I walk into my
apartment, I still
smell him. It’s very
upsetting, because he
left me. I’m still in love
with him, and it
just makes it harder.
It’s almost to the point
that I don’t even want
to go home, because
I know it’s going to
smell like him and
make me sad. But I
don’t want to move—I
love my apartment.
Ugh. - Male, Gay 25
I’m sorry you’re having
such a difficult time
with your relationship
ending; I promise it
will get easier. It’s very
true that smell can be
tied to emotion, but
there’s more here going
on. You’re anticipating
being sad when you get
home, which is going to
increase the odds of you
feeling sad. Instead, give
yourself something to
look forward to at home,
and when you notice
yourself thinking about
him, distract yourself and
do the things you were
looking forward to. Have
friends over and create
happy memories in the
apartment that have
nothing to do with your
ex. Light a candle and
get an air freshener; a lot
of this is probably in your
head.
My beau smells, and
I don’t like it. When I
first met him, I thought
he was super sexy, and
I loved how manly he
is. He’s one of those
guys that refuse to
BOYFRIEND
- IT’S TIME YOU
HAD THE TALK
wear deodorant, and
what I once found
really hot is now too
much. It’s getting to
the point where I don’t
know if I can stay with
him, and I get nervous
when we’re around my
friends, because I don’t
know if they’ll notice.
Can I break up with
someone because of
his smell? - Male, Gay,
31
You are allowed to
break up with someone
for any reason, or no
reason: It’s your life. Is
this a deal-breaker? You
can’t force someone to
wear deodorant, but
yeah, you can let him
know that it’s something
that’s bothering you.
Start by talking to him
about it. Find out what
it is about deodorant
that he isn’t into. Does
he like his smell, or is it
about health? There has
been research linking
some deodorant to
health issues. Is there
a compromise you’d
be willing to make? If
not, then maybe it’s
time to let him go free
and find someone who
enjoys his scent. There
are absolutely guys out
there that dig it.
Sex/Love/ReLationShip advice? Send youR queStionS to: thomaStaLkSabout@gmaiL.com
@thomaSWhitfieLd84

Greg Louganis is the greatest diver
in history. In Los Angeles at the
1984 Summer Olympics, Louganis
achieved gold medals in both the
men’s three-meter springboard
and 10-meter platform events. He
became the first diver to break
700-point mark in scoring of the
men’s platform in Olympic history.
At the 1988 Olympic Summer Games
held in Seoul, South Korea, he
won the gold for the three-meter
springboard competition, as well
as the gold for the men’s 10-meter
platform. He is the only male
and the second diver in Olympic
history to sweep the diving events
in consecutive Olympic Games.
Louganis continues to inspire us with
his work as a noted author, an activist
and a humanitarian.
You are the only male and the
second diver in Olympic history
to sweep the diving events in
consecutive Olympic Games, and
been called “the greatest American
diver.” It’s been 30 years since you
won two gold medals in the Seoul
Olympics. How do you reflect on
that period now?
I think it is “in the history of the
sport,” not just “America.” China,
Italy, Russia, had many wonderful
divers. It is in the history books. I
don’t reflect often about it, unless I
get questions like this.
How has the sport of diving
changed since your competition
days? Who are a few divers that
you follow?
The focus is on degree of difficulty.
The sport has changed tremendously,
and also they now have four more
medal events with synchronized
diving. Tom Daley, and [I’m] curious
who the new Chinese are; Sasha Klein
from Germany was a favorite of mine,
as well as Matthew Mitcham.

How has it been living with HIV
and your journey in the last
three decades?
I am still here.
What do you think of PrEP and
other advancements in HIV and
AIDS?
Much progress has been made.
Aside from being a decorated
athlete, your resume includes
acting in films and theater,
writing, coaching and activism.
Is there anything that you would
like to do that you haven’t done
so yet?
Go to Africa and help the wildlife
there.
What is a single misconception
about you?
I am serious.
What is your favorite charity or
cause?
The animal charities that are
actually helping animals.
Which living person do you most
admire?
They died, so sad…
What project(s) do you have
coming up?
Biopic, writing a musical, a book, a
clothing line, more acting at some
point.
Tell me a secret—a good one!
I kissed a girl. She had four legs
and [was] hairy. Yes, tongue was
involved—more on her part than
mine, sneaky bitch.
For more information about
Greg Louganis, please visit
greglouganis.com.