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The Ultimate Body Language Book

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Even stone faced women can be broken by persistent smiling so long as it is done properly. When<br />

smiling, men should never face women straight on, rather they should smile at an angle. <strong>The</strong> straight on<br />

look can be construed as aggressive and confrontational. Men should always break smiles by looking<br />

down, not away, up or to the side. A downward look shows that you are prepared to submit and that you<br />

are not a threat. If eye contact is made, keep it brief, lasting less than three seconds and always add a<br />

small genuine smile with head cocked at forty-five degrees. Avoid head on stares, prolonged looks, or<br />

abnormal or persistent eye widening, as these will surely send the wrong message.<br />

Even if women don’t respond immediately, it doesn’t mean that a future encounter won’t lead to<br />

positive things. In public we are habitually in displacement mode so most women initially see people as<br />

objects rather than people worthy of interaction. Men should understand that women find others,<br />

especially strange men, as potential threats to their safety. If, or rather when, because after all this is a<br />

numbers game, a man finds a willing participant, the sensation will be immediately exhilarating for<br />

both parties. However, smiling isn’t the end of the story, it’s the start. Smiling endlessly can become<br />

creepy so if invitations to conversation seems welcome, graduate to verbal dialogue and take things to<br />

the next level. If your experiment fails miserably, try adding a sharp nod or even a joyous “hi”, “hey”,<br />

or “hello.” A verbal connection or a more obvious nonverbal signal can serve to snap people more<br />

forcefully out of their public displacement.<br />

Smiles are inexpensive so don’t be afraid to use them, but do keep in mind that the vast majority of<br />

people, especially in crowded urban areas, might ignore them totally. Remember though, that just<br />

because the cues are ignored does not mean that it is a personal rejection, since logically, these people<br />

have no sense whatever about the smiler, they don’t even know them! Remember too, like a lot of<br />

things in life, smiling-success is a numbers game.

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