The Ultimate Body Language Book

of a bag or briefcase where the arms must cross the body, playing with a bracelet, watch or shirt button
and holding a drink with both hands. Any sort of motion that allows one hand or arm to cross the center
of the body, or where a crutch object is sought that otherwise serves little or no appropriate purpose,
qualifies as a security blanket. To those aware of the cue, it is a very easy ‘tell’ to catch, because there
really is no purpose for the behaviour aside from tension relief.
What to know if a women trust you? See how she reacts around her handbag! The handbag is a very
personal item for women and she uses it as an item of security. When nervous or out of place, she can
dive into her bag and checks its contents so as to symbolically connects her to the comforts of home
and exempt her from outside interruptions. In other words, while she checks her back, she’s busy, don’t
bother her! Handbags give women something to grasp onto and hold especially if they feel particularly
self-conscious or insecure and will feel naked without it. On the other hand, if she allows the handbag
contents to be viewed by a potential male suitor, or trusts him to guard it, you can bet that she is willing
to explore a relationship. Women are personally connected to their handbags!
Chapter 9 –Defensive And Aggressive Body Language
The Stiff Or Curved Arm
The stiff arm is an obvious signal that approach is unwelcome as it forms a solid barrier around our
personal space zone.
A more obvious defensive posture is the stiff arm which happens by thrusting the arm forward and
away from the body with the palm face vertical in a “stop” type signal. Another defensive posture is the
curved arm, a variation of the stiff arm, where the arm is bent and locked at the elbow and thrust
outward facing down or horizontally. As a cluster, the stiff arm and curved arm is accompanied by a
step backwards to reclaim stolen space, which is the true intention of the stiff arm. Both postures are
called “arm-distancing” tactics because the arms are used to control space. When we say “Keeping
people at arms length” this is the body language we refer to. The curved arm also creates a closed body
position since the arm crosses over the middle of the body. At times, the arm fails to come up any