The Ultimate Body Language Book

anger, and isn’t pale with fear.
Chapter 8 – Dominant and Submissive Gestures
Raising Status Through Relaxed Body Postures
Leaning back and taking up space is a way to show that we own the joint.
It might seem counter-intuitive, but taking on a relaxed position and postures when around others, such
as slumping in your chair can be a way to increase your status. This might be opposite to what you
would expect given the rules of height and power but slouching shows to everyone that you are
comfortable with yourself and don’t feeling anxious by someone else’s presence. By extension, most
people will find it difficult to relax when in the presence of higher ranking people. Therefore it follows
that if someone shows relaxed body postures, they must be high ranking! Subconsciously, we do think
this, although, when we know definitively that we outrank our slouching counterpart, we find them to
be brazen and ignorant which fosters more negative attitudes. This can go both ways, and it will be up
to you which route you take. Do you want to fit in, or “rock the boat”, so to speak.
Imagine entering your boss’s office because he wants to speak to you about your performance. You
promptly sit down, without permission, and slam your feet on top of his desk taking up an ownership
(comfortable) position. Without question, he will take offense. The rare exceptions can happen though.
Say you are close personal friends on top of your work relationship, or maybe you are of similar rank in
the office, say partners. What would happen if instead of putting your feet up on his desk you instead
slouch over the arm rest and open your legs? While this isn’t equally as offensive, it will come across
as a challenge to your boss’s dominance and put him on edge. In subordinate/dominant relationship
relaxed body language quickly upset whatever hierarchy was thought to have existed setting the tone
for future struggles which may or may not be your ultimate goal.
When competing with those of equal status, relaxed and dominant body language can help, rather than
hinder, your chances of success because it will set you above your competitors without using risky