The Ultimate Body Language Book

Open gestures are accompanied by phrases such as “Trust me.”, “I wouldn’t lie to you.” and “What,
you don’t believe me?” We also gesture with palms facing upward when we are offering something.
However, the offering, in this context, isn’t a tangible item, rather, it’s an idea. It could be a cell phone
plan coming from a salesman in the mall, or a reorganizing of the company, a downsizing, or new way
to deal with customers or any number of things requiring deal making or selling.
When the arms are completely outstretched with palms up we call it the “rogatory” posture, or prayerlike.
It is as if we are offering dialogue to another and sincerely want to be believed, trusted and
accepted. This posture is not dominant or even confident however, because it lacks conviction. So
while palm flashes show honesty and trustworthiness because they show no threat, they lack sustenance
and power in terms of conviction. Palm down displays though, by placing hands face down on a table
or standing head on and leaning with the fingertips spread to anchor the body shows emphatically that a
position is held confidently. While conversing on a topic, we should therefore expect both palms up and
palms down as opinions are either offered with reservation or presented with conviction. Depending on
your position on the matter you may wish to employ either submission or dominance to your
advantage. For example, on issues you wish to concede or are unsure of, of which making the other
party aware of this fact is acceptable, use palm up, but when you wish not to concede or wish not to be
uncovered as unsure, keep palms face down. The rule of thumb is that palms down “tell”, while palms
up, “offer.” When someone wishes to display honesty, such as declaring “You have to believe me, I
didn’t do it” they should use palm down displays otherwise they may not be telling the truth and expect
not to be believed.