The Ultimate Body Language Book

Itchy nose or does this mean something else?
Reading people is fairly simple and common sense once the language is learned, but initially there are a
lot of cues to recall so at times it can be confusing. At first it might be difficult just remembering the
cues, let alone pull them to consciousness when applicable, but with time this second language will
seem to flow naturally and in real time. Body language is fluid and happening all the time around us so
we can’t hit pause or rewind in real life to review individual cues. Thankfully, though, we don’t have
to. Even beginners can get the gist of things just by picking up a few cues here and there, however the
full meaning won’t come until the reader can piece together all the cues.
Context and other factors also play a role in deciphering meaning and then there is cluster of cues
where more then one cue happens at the same time and how it is the collection of cues all pointing
toward the same meaning that really gives us predictive power. Some of the cues are also very difficult
to read such as “microexpressions” which is a subset of cues that happen in only fractions of a second.
Other cues such as smiles happen only fleetingly, making it difficult to tell the differences between
honest ones and fake ones.
Important body language isn’t happening all the time either so we should not get too carried away.
Sometimes body movements are to serve a real function such as relieving an itch (if you can believe
that!). However, specific cues, as we will cover throughout this book, will begin to pop out at you as
they occur and it will be exhilarating. Reading body language will open up entirely new channel in
understanding the people around you. You may begin to notice the insecurities in your boss, how he
plays with his tie or cufflinks or how he is particular about his favourite chair or you might notice
power plays between a particularly dominant employee and how she tries to usurp power from those
higher in the ranks. When you begin to notice things you hadn’t before, it will be obvious that I have
accomplished my goal.
Chapter 1 - Why The Study Of Body Language Is Important
What Does It Mean To Read People?
Reading people involves connecting all their signals, both verbal and nonverbal, throwing out the junk
and connecting the rest to create meaning. The full story can only be told when all or most the factors
about your target are connected. Research has shown that it is far easier to get away with a written lie
over one told over the phone. From those facts you might guess that telling a lie in person is the
hardest. Each additional communication channel that is added gives us more clues as to what is really
going on. If we could adding information, such as a person’s heart rate and sweat gland activity which
is the primary channels using in lie detector machines we could be even more accurate. Therefore, just
using one channel, and ignoring others, won’t allow us to do our jobs as accurately as using all the
available channels.