The Ultimate Body Language Book

When space is invaded, we pull back.
In basic terms, our personal space zone is the perimeter that we feel is suitable to act as a buffer should
a dangerous situation arise. It provides us with enough time and space, we think, to react and mount a
defensive posture to protect ourselves from an attack. In a busy public area, we might tolerate (although
not prefer) moderate contact due to space limitations, but when space is abundant we see even mild
intrusions as a predictors of an attack. Our personal space zone, therefore, is an early warning system
that we use to help us predict the intensions of others.
These zones and distances are not immutable and universal, but are meant as a guide or rule of thumb.
Everyone has different levels of comfort based upon their upbringing, personality type, gender, age and
so forth. The summary listed below is a guideline that is meant for those living in areas such as
Australia, Canada, United States, Great Britain and New Zealand or other westernized countries such
as Iceland and Singapore or Guam. For other countries not listed, the zones may expand or contract
based on the inverse of their density. For example, Japan and China which have a high density have
smaller intimate zone distances. There is an inverse correlation to each zone, where the greater the
population density, the tighter the zones.
The safest way to test a person’s need for personal space is to move close, lean in, give a hearty but not
overly aggressive handshake, then take a step back to allow the person to either move in closer to
shrink the space between you and them or take a step backward, to suite a larger than average personal
space requirements. Too often people will move in too tight and overshadow someone else only to
make them uncomfortable. If someone requires less space, they won’t feel offended to take up the
space between you, and if you care anything about them, you won’t feel a need to step backwards
either. Shrinking space is a way for people to tell you that they enjoy you, and your company, and one
that you should not take offense to, but rather use as a measure of someone’s level of comfort.