May/June 2017 Shepherdess Voice

ALICE: MY HUSBAND LETS PHONE CALLS DISTURB OUR DINNER
DEAR
FREQUENTLY. CAN YOU HELP ME?
HOUR
ASK ALICE
Dear Concerned,
Having a spouse on his cell phone must be very frustrating as it takes precious time away from your
family and the quality conversations you would hope for during meal time. You are not alone in this
frustration. In fact, it was reported in the US that 11.4 million tech devices such as smartphones, tablets,
laptops and iPods are brought to family meals. Researchers at the Boston Medical Center went
undercover at 15 local fast food restaurants to observe parents dining with their children. They found 40
of the 55 families they observed to be absorbed with their devices continuously throughout their meal.
Some children ate their meals in silence, others begged for their parents' attention, and others acted
out.
A parent talking on the phone during meals sets a negative example for his kids. When a parent checks
cell phone texts or emails during family meals, family members agree it communicates to the them
that the person on the phone is more important than they are. It can communicate a lack of respect.
Many mentioned the offending party was being rude. With so little time to connect adequately with
our family during the day because of crazy schedules, I would recommend agreeing to lay down our
phones down during meal times.
The best time to have a discussion regarding this is when you have private time together and not at the
same time the offence is occurring. Set an appointment to talk before the next situation occurs. Create
boundaries for these devices so meal times can be about family bonding, developing social skills, and
sharing stories about that day. Enjoy just spending time with each other while participating in
conversations regarding your kid's lives, their personal and spiritual interests, table etiquette and telling
of your love for them. This is critical for your children's healthy development.