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RACHEL I slept only fitfully after looking online. The phrases I’d read repeated in my head over and over again. When I woke up for what felt like the hundredth time, the Stormtrooper clock beside the bed read 4.47 am. Ben’s bedding was twisted around me and I felt exhausted and cold. Nicky was sleeping in my room, with the door open. I didn’t want to wake her. I crept downstairs quietly and didn’t turn any lights on. On the kitchen table I found her laptop. I opened it and the glow from the screen lit up my fingers, poised over the keyboard. It asked me for a password. I watched the cursor blinking as I tried to think what it might be. I knew it wouldn’t be the name of any of her daughters. She’d lectured me once on password security and the foolishness of using your children’s or pet’s names. I tried ‘Rosedown’, which was the name of the cottage we grew up in. ‘Incorrect password’ was the computer’s response. I tried ‘rhubarbcustard’ – a reference to Nicky’s blog. It didn’t work. I had one more shot at it, and no clue what to try. On a whim, because it was my password in spite of her advice, and because my exhausted brain couldn’t come up with anything else, I tried ‘Benedict’. It worked. I leaned back in my chair in surprise, but then I felt a rush of affection towards Nicky: my bossy sister, a proud enough aunty to use Ben’s name as her password. Now that I was in, I searched ‘Benedict Finch Missing’. News items from all different sources appeared on the screen. The story had exploded. Images of me from the press conference appeared alongside Ben’s photo: my bleeding head, my white pallor, my body language and my angry eyes. Many of the news headlines were blatantly aggressive towards me. But I still couldn’t help myself. Like a moth to a flame I clicked on the Facebook site. There were hundreds of posts. The top one was from somebody called Cathy Franklin. Cathy Franklin The mother has done something to him thats obvious 2 hours ago · Like Stuart Weston Police wouldn’t have let her tlk at press conf if they suspected her 2 hours ago · Like Cathy Franklin Stuart that’s not true has been seen before that people crying in press confs have been convicted. about an hour ago · Like
Rich Jameson Some people hang themselves like that perhaps they’re trying to catch her out. U wouldn’t believe how many people have done this go to www.whereisbenedictfinch.wordpress.com u be amazed. 42 minutes ago · Like · 6 Write a comment... I clicked on the link. My heart was pounding, my mouth bone dry. The page appeared instantly:
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Gilly Macmillan grew up in Swindon,
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Burnt Paper Sky Table of Contents A
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JIM BEFORE
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DAY 2 JIM
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JIM
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JIM
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JIM
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DAY 3 JIM
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JIM
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DAY 4 JIM
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DAY 5 JIM
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DAY 6 JIM
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DAY 7 JIM
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DAY 8 JIM
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DAY 9 JIM
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JIM
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RACHEL
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RACHEL ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS BIBLIOGRAPH
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Author’s Note During the research
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PROLOGUE NOVEMBER 2013 - ONE YEAR A
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imaginary interview goes really wel
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But whether I’ve been awake or as
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BEFORE DAY 1 SUNDAY, 21 OCTOBER 201
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eally honest, I hadn’t noticed it
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‘OK,’ and he was off, careering
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as if the woodland was holding its
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appeared on the path. Our progress
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‘That’s good news,’ she said.
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FM: Do you think that expressing fe
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JC: It was a promotion is what it w
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suspect, is not going to be an easy
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RACHEL John couldn’t stand the wa
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It was the awkward twitch of Inspec
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‘Solid eight hours,’ I said. I
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RACHEL Inspector Miller said that b
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JIM Kenneth Steele House is where I
Page 118 and 119: had four pairs of officers in place
Page 120 and 121: at others. He was always watching m
Page 122 and 123: JIM I was quite pleased with how th
Page 124 and 125: his parents as well as his grandpar
Page 126 and 127: ‘Expertise is on our side,’ she
Page 128 and 129: RACHEL My sister Nicky was waiting
Page 130 and 131: unstoppable. She told me that the w
Page 132 and 133: the streetlights and the geometric
Page 134 and 135: JIM Addendum to DI James Clemo’s
Page 136 and 137: FM: So you recommended Emma for the
Page 138 and 139: DAY 3 TUESDAY, 23 OCTOBER 2012 Be a
Page 140 and 141: RACHEL In the car on the way to Ken
Page 142 and 143: ‘If you are the person who is wit
Page 144 and 145: ‘This way,’ she said. She swept
Page 146 and 147: ‘It’s a soft alibi.’ Fraser w
Page 148 and 149: trace of dignity or vulnerability,
Page 150 and 151: missing”, and that everybody is l
Page 152 and 153: looking woman too: nicely dressed,
Page 154 and 155: ‘Were there signs that the arm wa
Page 156 and 157: accident. But we’ll check it out
Page 158 and 159: To the insultingly practical: Don
Page 162 and 163: FM: So apart from the negative pres
Page 164 and 165: they’re focused on the job? FM: Y
Page 166 and 167: DAY 4 WEDNESDAY, 24 OCTOBER 2012 Cr
Page 170 and 171: WEB PAGE - www.whereisbenedictfinch
Page 172 and 173: JIM I spoke to Emma before I left f
Page 174 and 175: say that he doesn’t play by the r
Page 176 and 177: ‘Bye,’ Fount said to him. ‘Wh
Page 178 and 179: thanked her for what she did for us
Page 180 and 181: I sat on the bed for a long time, u
Page 182 and 183: JIM Fraser and I had a pre-meet bef
Page 184 and 185: ‘He’s got an alibi, doesn’t h
Page 186 and 187: RACHEL Nicky phoned the police and
Page 188 and 189: door in the middle of the night. Yo
Page 190 and 191: an orange wash remained. It struck
Page 192 and 193: RACHEL When I got back inside Nicky
Page 194 and 195: JIM On the night of Wednesday, 24 O
Page 196 and 197: DAY 5 THURSDAY, 25 OCTOBER 2012 You
Page 198 and 199: RACHEL I slept the night in Ben’s
Page 200 and 201: individuals closest to Ben, and he
Page 202 and 203: ‘What about their son, Charlie Bo
Page 204 and 205: He took another sheet of paper from
Page 206 and 207: more imperfect than any version of
Page 210 and 211: JC: She said she was knackered. She
Page 212 and 213: It led swiftly to the fourth state.
Page 214 and 215: Quick response appreciated, obvious
Page 216 and 217: WEB PAGE - www.whereisbenedictfinch
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I didn’t know what to say. I look
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RACHEL Zhang agreed to come and giv
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sensation. Then she spoke to him of
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abstract shapes floating within it,
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JIM I got one of the DCs to pick up
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RACHEL This time, I made no attempt
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dog, black and white like Skittle,
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FM: I’m not intending to. That’
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everything that had happened. But I
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JIM We worked closely with John Fin
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DAY 7 SATURDAY, 27 OCTOBER 2012 An
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RACHEL In the early hours of the mo
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school year, but I started to work
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tight. A hospital band was visible
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cancer himself. The whole family, w
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Another page. A different drawing:
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‘The blog.’ I was slow; I didn
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told him to fuck off. ‘Tell Frase
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‘Stop asking me to be patient. Ho
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JIM In the incident room the blinds
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swing. ‘So what are we thinking?
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‘She’s drunk?’ I asked when h
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JIM Addendum to DI James Clemo’s
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JC: Fine. He coaxes his lips up int
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JIM It was Emma who I thought of al
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DAY 8 SUNDAY, 28 OCTOBER 2012 The P
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RACHEL When dawn came there was no
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JIM Nine o’clock Sunday morning,
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RACHEL The hospital receptionist se
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RACHEL My cab driver on the way hom
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tall bear of a man, with very dark
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‘To be honest, I assumed Nicky wo
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He actually put his hand over his h
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‘Cool,’ my avatar said. ‘New
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me wants you here to run the invest
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I behaved in an arrogant and disgus
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RACHEL I logged on to Furry Footbal
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‘I know it was him,’ I said. Th
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Her handbag was on the seat between
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so that my toes were already numb.
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‘It’s what Miss May said, about
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He sat back down. ‘Again,’ he s
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JIM Nicky Forbes was disturbed by m
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RACHEL It took me twenty-five minut
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here. And then I saw something else
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JIM Nicky Forbes’s expression was
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RACHEL They prised me up off the ca
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Operator: OK. They’re a few minut
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RECORD OF EVIDENCE: AVON AND SOMERS
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RACHEL Bristol Children’s Hospita
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‘Is the child all right?’ Mrs M
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RACHEL I approached my son’s beds
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EPILOGUE CHRISTMAS 2013 - ONE YEAR,
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RACHEL A few weeks ago, somebody as
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that he loved so much in return. Th
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JC: Yes. FM: Have you seen her sinc
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RACHEL We might never have closure,
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us that. He came to our house and w
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BIBLIOGRAPHY The following websites
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