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missing”, and that everybody is looking for him.’ Peter took a noisy sip of tea. ‘Finn’s been having nightmares since Sunday, because of being there in the woods with us I think.’ The thought of Finn’s concern and the memory of his anxious face in the car park made me feel Ben’s absence more vividly than ever. I thought of Baggy Bear upstairs, on Ben’s bed, and his nunny. I thought of Ben without either of his favourite objects, without me, without comfort, somewhere out there, going through something that none of us could imagine. I crumpled. ‘Oh I’m sorry,’ said Peter. ‘I’m so sorry. I’ve put my foot in it. That’s the last thing I meant to do.’ He looked at his watch. ‘I should go.’ Nicky showed him out, said all the things that I couldn’t, like ‘thank you’ and ‘we’ll let you know if we hear anything’, and ‘thank you again’. I found Laura in the front room. She was on the sofa, hunched over her tablet. ‘I think this has the potential to go wrong for you,’ she said. ‘What do you mean?’ ‘It’s all over the net. Facebook, Twitter, comments on news websites, everywhere.’ ‘What is?’ ‘I was right. They’re saying you’ve done something to Ben.’

JIM Ben Finch’s primary school reminded me of my own: small neighbourhood school, hotchpotch of portable classrooms clustered around a Victorian building on a cramped site. Fraser told me to take DC Woodley to the school with me, which was annoying in one way because he had a tendency to behave as though he had L-plates stuck on his back, even though he’d been in CID for over a year. On the other hand, if anyone was going to witness my humiliation at being demoted, however temporarily, to the role of school liaison officer, I suppose he was a good choice because he was too weedy to gloat. ‘No gumption’ my dad would have said about him, and probably worse. The school secretary fussed around us, boiling the kettle, and looking disappointed when we didn’t want tea or coffee. She wanted to talk. It’s not uncommon. When something traumatic has happened, everyone connected to it has his or her own version of the story to tell. It’s why the press find it so damn easy to fill columns; almost everybody wants to get their few minutes of fame. The secretary told us she’d known something was wrong when Rachel Jenner hadn’t returned her calls on Monday morning, because it was so unlike her. They automatically called parents, she said, when a child didn’t turn up and there’d been no word from them. She clutched a mug that read, ‘Don’t talk to me until this is empty!’ Fixed to the side of her computer monitor there was a photograph of Ayers Rock under a pink and orange sunset, and a Bible quote, which claimed that faith moved mountains. Both of them irritated me. ‘How often is Ben Finch absent from school?’ I asked her. ‘Hardly ever! He’s a lovely boy, ever so polite, ever so good. I couldn’t tell you what his schoolwork is like, mind you, you’d have to ask Miss May or the Head about that, but I can tell you he’s a lovely boy. He brings the register in to me in the mornings and he always has a smile. I say to him, “Benedict Finch, you’ll go far with those super manners.”’ She got teary, removing her glasses to wipe her eyes. ‘Sorry,’ she said and followed that with a little outtake of air, a puff of distress that dispersed into the room. ‘You will find him, won’t you, Inspector?’ ‘We’ll do our best,’ I said. The headmaster’s office was cramped. We sat around his desk on rigid moulded plastic chairs that didn’t fit my body shape in any way. ‘I’m sorry, Detective Inspector,’ he said, ‘I was in the middle of a special assembly when you arrived and I didn’t want to alarm the children by running off. They’re rattled enough already. Damien Allen, by the way.’ He had a sleepy quality about him, heavily lidded eyes, a jowly face under hair that was in need of a cut, and a ponderous voice that would have had me dozing off before the end of any assembly. I shook his extended hand and found his grip loose. ‘I’m new to this job,’ he added. ‘It’s not ideal.’ I took that to mean the situation, not the job. Ben’s teacher shook hands more earnestly; she had a bit of a pincer grip and she was one of those people who shake for longer than you’ve anticipated. It’s an anxiety thing. They don’t want to let go of you in case you disappear just when they need you. Like the Head, she was holding herself together quite well, but there were signs of distress in the way she clasped her hands tightly together and she looked on the verge of tears. She was a good-

JIM<br />

Ben Finch’s primary school reminded me of my own: small neighbourhood school, hotchpotch of<br />

portable classrooms clustered around a Victorian building on a cramped site.<br />

Fraser told me to take DC Woodley to the school with me, which was annoying in one way because<br />

he had a tendency to behave as though he had L-plates stuck on his back, even though he’d been in<br />

CID for over a year. On the other hand, if anyone was going to witness my humiliation at being<br />

demoted, however temporarily, to the role of school liaison officer, I suppose he was a good choice<br />

because he was too weedy to gloat. ‘No gumption’ my dad would have said about him, and probably<br />

worse.<br />

The school secretary fussed around us, boiling the kettle, and looking disappointed when we didn’t<br />

want tea or coffee. She wanted to talk. It’s not uncommon. When something traumatic has happened,<br />

everyone connected to it has his or her own version of the story to tell. It’s why the press find it so<br />

damn easy to fill columns; almost everybody wants to get their few minutes of fame.<br />

The secretary told us she’d known something was wrong when Rachel Jenner hadn’t returned her<br />

calls on Monday morning, because it was so unlike her. They automatically called parents, she said,<br />

when a child didn’t turn up and there’d been no word from them. She clutched a mug that read, ‘Don’t<br />

talk to me until this is empty!’ Fixed to the side of her computer monitor there was a photograph of<br />

Ayers Rock under a pink and orange sunset, and a Bible quote, which claimed that faith moved<br />

mountains. Both of them irritated me.<br />

‘How often is Ben Finch absent from school?’ I asked her.<br />

‘Hardly ever! He’s a lovely boy, ever so polite, ever so good. I couldn’t tell you what his<br />

schoolwork is like, mind you, you’d have to ask Miss May or the Head about that, but I can tell you<br />

he’s a lovely boy. He brings the register in to me in the mornings and he always has a smile. I say to<br />

him, “Benedict Finch, you’ll go far with those super manners.”’<br />

She got teary, removing her glasses to wipe her eyes.<br />

‘Sorry,’ she said and followed that with a little outtake of air, a puff of distress that dispersed into<br />

the room. ‘You will find him, won’t you, Inspector?’<br />

‘We’ll do our best,’ I said.<br />

The headmaster’s office was cramped. We sat around his desk on rigid moulded plastic chairs that<br />

didn’t fit my body shape in any way.<br />

‘I’m sorry, Detective Inspector,’ he said, ‘I was in the middle of a special assembly when you<br />

arrived and I didn’t want to alarm the children by running off. They’re rattled enough already. Damien<br />

Allen, by the way.’<br />

He had a sleepy quality about him, heavily lidded eyes, a jowly face under hair that was in need of<br />

a cut, and a ponderous voice that would have had me dozing off before the end of any assembly. I<br />

shook his extended hand and found his grip loose.<br />

‘I’m new to this job,’ he added. ‘It’s not ideal.’<br />

I took that to mean the situation, not the job.<br />

Ben’s teacher shook hands more earnestly; she had a bit of a pincer grip and she was one of those<br />

people who shake for longer than you’ve anticipated. It’s an anxiety thing. They don’t want to let go of<br />

you in case you disappear just when they need you.<br />

Like the Head, she was holding herself together quite well, but there were signs of distress in the<br />

way she clasped her hands tightly together and she looked on the verge of tears. She was a good-

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