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‘That’s good news,’ she said. ‘It means they’re taking it seriously.’
Why wouldn’t they? I wondered. Why wouldn’t they take a missing child seriously? I stepped
towards John. I wanted to touch him, just his hand. Actually, I wanted him to hold me. Instead, I got a
look of disbelief.
‘You let him run ahead?’ he said and his voice was stretched thin with tension. ‘What were you
thinking?’
‘I’m sorry,’ I said. ‘I’m so sorry.’
There was no point in trying to give him an explanation. It was done. I would regret it for ever.
WPC Banks said, ‘I think for now it would be best if all of our focus is on the search for Ben. It
won’t do him any good if you cast blame.’
She was right. John understood that. He was blinking back tears. He looked distraught and
incredulous. I watched him cycle through everything I’d been feeling since Ben had gone. He had
question after question, each of which WPC Banks answered patiently until he was satisfied that he
knew everything there was to know, and that everything possible was being done.
As I stood beside him, and let WPC Banks reassure him, I realised that it had been more than ten
months since I’d seen him smile, and I wondered if I ever would again.