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Chapter Fourteen
Elena felt her flesh creep at the words.
"You don't mean that," she said shakily. She remembered what she had seen on the roof, the blood
smeared on Stefan's lips, and she forced herself not to recoil from him. "Stefan, I know you. You
couldn't have done that…"
He ignored her protestations, just went on staring with eyes that burned like the green ice at the
bottom of a glacier. He was looking through her, into some incomprehensible distance. "As I lay in
bed that night, I hoped against hope that she would come. Already I was noticing some of the changes
in myself. I could see better in the dark; it seemed I could hear better. I felt stronger than ever before,
full of some elemental energy. And I was hungry.
"It was a hunger I had never imagined. At dinner I found that ordinary food and drink did nothing to
satisfy it. I couldn't understand that. And then I saw the white neck of one of the serving girls, and I
knew why." He drew a long breath, his eyes dark and tortured. "That night, I resisted the need, though
it took all my will. I was thinking of Katherine, and praying she would come to me. Praying!" He gave
a short laugh. "If a creature like me can pray."
Elena's fingers were numb within his grasp, but she tried to tighten them, to send him reassurance.
"Go on, Stefan."
He had no trouble speaking now. He seemed almost to have forgotten her presence, as if he were
telling this story to himself.
"The next morning the need was stronger. It was as if my own veins were dry and cracked,
desperate for moisture. I knew that I couldn't stand it for long.
"I went to Katherine's chambers. I meant to ask her, to plead with her – " His voice cracked. He
paused and then went on. "But Damon was there already, waiting outside her rooms. I could see that
he hadn't resisted the need. The glow of his skin, the spring in his step, told me that. He looked as
smug as the cat who's had the cream.
"But he hadn't had Katherine. 'Knock all you like,' he said to me, 'but the female dragon inside won't
let you past. I've tried already. Shall we overpower her, you and I?'
"I wouldn't answer him. The look on his face, that sly, self-satisfied look, repelled me. I pounded on
that door to wake…" He faltered, and then gave another humorless laugh. "I was going to say, 'to
wake the dead.' But the dead aren't so hard to wake after all, are they?" After a moment, he went on.
"The maid, Gudren, opened the door. She had a face like a flat white plate, and eyes like black
glass. I asked her if I could see her mistress. I expected to be told that Katherine was asleep, but
instead Gudren just looked at me, then at Damon over my shoulder.
" 'I would not tell him,' she said at last, 'but I will tell you. My lady Katerina is not within. She went
out early this morning, to walk in the gardens. She said she had much need of thought.'
"I was surprised. 'Early this morning?' I said.