Caribbean Compass Yachting Magazine February 2017
Welcome to Caribbean Compass, the most widely-read boating publication in the Caribbean! THE MOST NEWS YOU CAN USE - feature articles on cruising destinations, regattas, environment, events...
Welcome to Caribbean Compass, the most widely-read boating publication in the Caribbean! THE MOST NEWS YOU CAN USE - feature articles on cruising destinations, regattas, environment, events...
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JAN<br />
and I (George) have been cruising<br />
the Eastern <strong>Caribbean</strong> for over<br />
four years now onboard our<br />
Lagoon 570 named Wildcat. During that time, we have<br />
enjoyed having an occasional guest or two onboard,<br />
but never more than two guests at one time. It is not<br />
that we do not have the room. The boat sleeps six. It is<br />
just that I do not know four people who want to put up<br />
with my smart-assed personality for a week. If they<br />
want to come, they should really bring their own boat.<br />
That all changed in June, 2016, when all four of our<br />
grandkids arrived at Secret Harbour, Grenada, to join<br />
us for a week onboard the Wildcat. I discovered that<br />
this new iPhone generation runs on water, pizza and<br />
bandwidth. I call this generation the iKids.<br />
Whose idea was it to have four teenagers onboard for<br />
an entire week? That is six people on Wildcat. Never<br />
before and possibly never again unless we get a bigger<br />
boat. Evidently, a 57-foot cat does not have enough<br />
room for all of these iKids and their stuff. Do we need<br />
to buy a bigger boat? It would be a lot cheaper and<br />
easier to disown some iKids.<br />
Let’s start with the luggage. Evidently, “packing light<br />
in duffel bags” means bringing everything that you<br />
own in some type of titanium case with wheels. I am<br />
currently installing luggage racks on top of the cockpit<br />
iKids Aboard!<br />
iPhones at all times in all harbors. The iKids could not<br />
fathom the concept of not being able to be online while<br />
we were sailing between islands. How can the Third<br />
World be so unfair? We are now signed up for internet<br />
in all harbors in Grenada and Carriacou on cruiser’s<br />
WiFi. For those of you who could not get on the cruiser’s<br />
WiFi network that week, I am truly sorry. You can<br />
blame the iKids for sucking up all of the bandwidth.<br />
On Day #1, we had the iKids turn off their iPhones<br />
long enough to teach them the fine art of sail folding.<br />
by George Todd<br />
Sheridan tried to Google sail folding. I told her that we<br />
have a learn-by-doing, “Outward Bound” approach to<br />
sailing, which requires that she actually put her iPhone<br />
down and pick up the sail. Isn’t sailing fun, iKids? No,<br />
they did not really think that sail folding was all that<br />
exciting. After one minute, they lost interest and were<br />
back on their iPhones attempting to outsource sail folding<br />
to someone in Mumbai for five bucks. Apparently,<br />
iKids have the attention span of a horny gnat.<br />
—Continued on next page<br />
S/V PARTNERS<br />
Above: iKids do not pack light<br />
Right: Wildcat underway<br />
hard top next to the solar panels. In fact, I might as<br />
well take the solar panels off. The iKids brought so<br />
many electrical devices that the solar panels do not<br />
come close to keeping up with the battery drain. Even<br />
the 9.2 KW generator is having trouble keeping up<br />
with electrical load requirements.<br />
The iKids’ first question when they got off of the<br />
plane was: “Where is my WiFi?” All four of them had<br />
their USA iPhones out and were impatiently looking at<br />
me. “Come on, Pappy George, give us the code. We<br />
have not texted or Tweeted or Snapchatted or<br />
Instagramed in almost three hours. Our lives are going<br />
to end if we can’t get online right now!”<br />
If you have iKids onboard, you need bandwidth and<br />
lots of it. They demanded bandwidth for all four<br />
FEBRUARY <strong>2017</strong> CARIBBEAN COMPASS PAGE 27<br />
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