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Come Sit with Me <strong>by</strong> the River<br />
First edition 2015<br />
Copyright © 2015 <strong>Avril</strong> <strong>Meallem</strong><br />
All Rights Reserved<br />
No part of this book, except brief excerpts for<br />
the purpose of reviews, may be reproduced in<br />
any manner without permission of the author.<br />
Lavi Publications, Jerusalem, Israel<br />
E-mail: aemeallem@gmail.com<br />
Web sites: www.avrilm.webs.com<br />
www.tapestrypoetry.webs.com
Dedications<br />
To my cherished husband Ezra and children Michael,<br />
Reyna, Daniel and Ilana without whose encouragement<br />
and love my poetic journey would have never flourished.<br />
To my precious grandchildren who bring me so much joy.<br />
To all my friends and colleagues for their continuous<br />
support and love.<br />
In Loving Memory of my parents Enid and Jack Altman.<br />
Appreciation<br />
My sincere gratitude and appreciation to Gretti Izak for<br />
her constant encouragement to continue on my adventure<br />
in the world of poetry and to her, Ruth Fogelman and<br />
Esther Sutton for their invaluable critique of this collection<br />
of poems.
Contents<br />
Preface<br />
ix<br />
Poet’s Pen<br />
A Book of Time<br />
Come Sit with Me<br />
My River<br />
This Glorious Nature<br />
An Ancient Melody<br />
Gratitude<br />
A Scene of Dreams<br />
Undaunted <strong>by</strong> the Wind<br />
A Forest Tapestry<br />
Lost in a Dreamy Reverie<br />
In the Depth of the Forest<br />
When all is Still<br />
Song of Silence<br />
Transparent Moonbeams<br />
A Greyscale Painting<br />
A Door in the Wall<br />
Shadow of a Butterfly<br />
Birth of an Inspiration<br />
Little Grasshopper<br />
The Horseradish<br />
A Very Contented Snail<br />
15<br />
16<br />
18<br />
19<br />
20<br />
21<br />
22<br />
23<br />
24<br />
25<br />
26<br />
27<br />
28<br />
29<br />
30<br />
31<br />
32<br />
33<br />
34<br />
35<br />
36
A Light So Bright<br />
Take this Pen<br />
Dancing on the Pages<br />
Without Thought<br />
Orchestra of Angels<br />
Here is the Key<br />
Cosmic Balance<br />
So Fragile<br />
His Presence<br />
To Drink from His Gifts<br />
My Soul has a Voice<br />
Oasis of Tranquility<br />
At the Kotel<br />
A Moonless Night<br />
Born to Dance<br />
A Particle of Dust<br />
Our Umbilical Cord<br />
To Bask in His Glory<br />
It Can Only Be Good<br />
Love<br />
41<br />
42<br />
43<br />
44<br />
45<br />
46<br />
47<br />
48<br />
49<br />
50<br />
51<br />
52<br />
53<br />
54<br />
55<br />
56<br />
57<br />
58<br />
59
Can I Let Go?<br />
There in the corner of my life<br />
I feel empty<br />
Snow clouds skim<br />
Here is my pen<br />
My thoughts are entangled<br />
A piece of white parchment<br />
I stir fry my words<br />
Open a window<br />
I’m groping for a stronghold<br />
Corridors of my life<br />
I have misplaced the key<br />
I put the key into the lock<br />
I cannot let go<br />
As a child there was a force<br />
I search the seas<br />
The clouds part<br />
It hits me like a flood<br />
An empty pot sits on the stove<br />
I will not delve into my pain<br />
Where is my song hiding<br />
Am I seeking to return<br />
63<br />
64<br />
65<br />
66<br />
67<br />
68<br />
69<br />
70<br />
71<br />
72<br />
73<br />
74<br />
75<br />
76<br />
77<br />
78<br />
79<br />
80<br />
81<br />
82<br />
83
Kaleidoscope<br />
Soft Grey Clay<br />
Virgin Canvas<br />
And then I Remembered<br />
Eternal Love<br />
Welcome<br />
Do not Feel Sad for Me<br />
I Won’t Give Up<br />
Choices<br />
Patience<br />
India<br />
Overwhelmed<br />
A Magical Moment in Mongolia<br />
Beyond Labels<br />
Stop a Moment<br />
A Surreal Scene<br />
Jerusalem<br />
To the Kotel<br />
Our Eyes Meet<br />
Cry of the Earth<br />
Imagination<br />
My Story<br />
Glossary<br />
87<br />
88<br />
89<br />
90<br />
92<br />
93<br />
94<br />
96<br />
98<br />
99<br />
100<br />
101<br />
102<br />
104<br />
106<br />
107<br />
108<br />
109<br />
110<br />
111<br />
111<br />
115
בס "ד<br />
Preface<br />
My hope in sharing these poems is that they will<br />
bring to you the same feelings of hope, joy and<br />
wonderment that I experienced. The poems in<br />
section three express my struggle with personal<br />
emotions which some of you may also relate to and<br />
have the feeling; oh, so I am not the only one!<br />
I have so much gratitude to HaShem for having<br />
opened His gates of creativity and allowed me to<br />
connect to the source of free-flowing words that<br />
are beyond my thoughts.<br />
<strong>Avril</strong> <strong>Meallem</strong>
Come Sit with Me<br />
<strong>by</strong> the River
Poet’s pen touches paper.<br />
A spring bursts forth<br />
from a source beyond thought.<br />
Words spill into the river of time.
A Book of Time<br />
We’re all just specs of the same stardust<br />
animated <strong>by</strong> the supernal energy<br />
that flows throughout the universe.<br />
I, you, the rocks, the sea...<br />
no different in intrinsic matter;<br />
differentiated only <strong>by</strong> the Will of God.<br />
We are all as one,<br />
a unity beyond understanding.<br />
My life ebbs and flows<br />
as all life, as all oceans.<br />
So you see, my book is your book;<br />
a book of time in a timeless universe.<br />
~51~
Come Sit with Me<br />
Come, sit with me<br />
here <strong>by</strong> the river.<br />
Let your feet dangle<br />
in the sparkling waters.<br />
Feel the coolness<br />
calm your mind,<br />
just be here<br />
in this moment.<br />
Speak to me in silence<br />
and I will hear your soul.<br />
Let our eyes focus<br />
on our broken reflections<br />
Is that you or me?<br />
Can you hear my heart?<br />
It speaks of love,<br />
a bond between us<br />
that can never be broken.<br />
I feel the breeze<br />
Can you?<br />
~51~
I hear the rustle<br />
of overhanging, willow leaves<br />
Can you?<br />
I see the Divine<br />
Can you?<br />
Come closer –Take my hand,<br />
I know the river<br />
Do you?<br />
~51~
My River<br />
I flow over pebbles,<br />
curve around rocky outcrops,<br />
carve my way through deepening valleys.<br />
Sometimes tranquil, gently reflecting<br />
the images of my surroundings,<br />
as paintings deep within my soul.<br />
Other times spewing up spray<br />
like a volcanic eruption,<br />
as I travel over a multitude<br />
of hidden boulders.<br />
Then I fall into an a<strong>by</strong>ss of nothingness.<br />
Hurtling down the cliff wall<br />
I fear catastrophe, the unknown,<br />
but there is no turning back<br />
and only my faith in the Creator sustains me.<br />
I hit the river bed below<br />
and continue on my ever changing journey<br />
to merge with the waters of the open sea,<br />
evaporate heavenwards,<br />
and wait till I become as a raindrop<br />
to fall back to the earth once again.<br />
~51~
This Glorious Nature<br />
The smell of new mown grass,<br />
the intoxicating perfume<br />
of citrus blossom, jasmine and roses,<br />
the sun on my shivering skin,<br />
a gentle breeze in sweltering heat.<br />
The warmth of a rock<br />
heated <strong>by</strong> the summer sun,<br />
the tickling of dry sand<br />
and the roundness of pebbles on a beach,<br />
the wonder of a world beneath the sea.<br />
The laughter of children happily at play,<br />
the trust of a purring cat,<br />
the joy in the bird's morning song,<br />
the roar of crashing waves.<br />
The crackle of dried, autumn leaves,<br />
the gentleness of falling snowflakes,<br />
the early morning dew that carpets the earth,<br />
the swirling mist rising from a valley below,<br />
the power of a swollen river after a storm.<br />
Oh, let me feel it all deep within my heart!<br />
~51~
An Ancient Melody<br />
Moon drops, like diamonds,<br />
dance to an ancient melody<br />
on the undulating waves<br />
of the darkening sea.<br />
The sun, as it rises,<br />
never witnesses this beauty,<br />
never knows that its enactment<br />
was from its own special light.<br />
The moon,<br />
only able to reflect another’s promise<br />
like a servant at its master’s hand.<br />
Our lives in the Hand of God;<br />
puppets on a string,<br />
acting in His theatre of life.<br />
~02~
Gratitude<br />
Lapping waves<br />
sing the song of creation.<br />
A shimmering sun<br />
battles with the cool breeze.<br />
Almighty God,<br />
how can I express my gratitude<br />
that my legs brought me<br />
to the edge of this ocean,<br />
that my eyes can capture<br />
Your treasures,<br />
that my ears can hear<br />
nature’s sounds,<br />
that my hands can write down<br />
my innermost feelings.<br />
Angels of light<br />
dance on the darkening sea,<br />
now caressed <strong>by</strong> the setting sun.<br />
My skin chills, but I cannot leave.<br />
~05~
A Scene of Dreams<br />
Songs of seagulls<br />
warm breeze on my skin<br />
dry sand between my toes<br />
sky with streaks of pink and gold<br />
blood red sun on the ocean’s horizon<br />
diamonds on the crests of waves –<br />
a scene of dreams, hopes and desires<br />
a precious moment in the tide of time<br />
~00~
Undaunted <strong>by</strong> the Wind<br />
How inspiring to gaze at a tree!<br />
Sense its roots reaching deep down<br />
into the rich brown earth,<br />
holding, nourishing,<br />
seeking the truth in the darkness.<br />
Feel its branches,<br />
like arms reaching upwards<br />
to touch the essence of Heaven.<br />
Experience the trunk so strong,<br />
undaunted <strong>by</strong> the power of the wind,<br />
yet dancing, flowing,<br />
yielding to the tide of life.<br />
Connect to the fruits that it gives<br />
unconditionally to the world,<br />
never knowing their final destiny.<br />
~02~
A Forest Tapestry<br />
Brown and grey boulders,<br />
forest of many shades of green.<br />
A breeze rustles the overhead leaves<br />
creating a ballet of speckled light<br />
on the earth below.<br />
A lizard sunning itself<br />
notices my presence,<br />
darts into the undergrowth.<br />
How much of nature<br />
lies hidden from my eyes?<br />
A black fly with a red head<br />
investigates a possible food source<br />
on the tip of my toe,<br />
wanders along my foot, tickles,<br />
but I let it be.<br />
We enjoy the forest together,<br />
for I, too, am part of this tapestry,<br />
captured in all its beauty.<br />
~02~
Lost in a Dreamy Reverie<br />
Fir trees surround my little hollow<br />
as if guarding me from an unseen foe,<br />
their pine needles tinkling<br />
in the gentle summer breeze.<br />
I am alone with myself,<br />
lost in a dreamy reverie<br />
until, through a gap in the forest,<br />
my eye catches the shape of a towering building<br />
and the roar of traffic assaults my ears;<br />
civilization’s so called progress and pleasures.<br />
But then,<br />
a bird’s melodic call<br />
transports me back<br />
to my place of tranquility<br />
in nature’s enchanting garden.<br />
~01~
In the Depth of the Forest<br />
A warm summer breeze caresses my face −<br />
God, comforting me with His gentle hands,<br />
calming the tangled webs<br />
that swirl around in my mind.<br />
In the tranquility of this moment,<br />
as shafts of sunlight penetrate<br />
the foliage canopy,<br />
I hear His voice<br />
whispering in the rustle of leaves.<br />
Can I be silent?<br />
Allow myself to be filled with His music.<br />
Absorb all the knowing that surrounds me.<br />
Find my bliss in the depth of this forest<br />
and take it back into my world outside.<br />
~01~
When All is Still<br />
It was moonlit night,<br />
one of those magical moments<br />
when all is still<br />
and the world sleeps.<br />
Black granite hills surround the valley<br />
like arms, cradling a resting child.<br />
Seated on a soft, grassy mound<br />
and overcome <strong>by</strong> the silence,<br />
I fell into a deep meditation.<br />
Sensing a oneness with the universe<br />
my soul soared to connect with the Creator.<br />
I danced to His song as I dissolved<br />
into an ecstatic nothingness.<br />
~01~
Song of Silence<br />
I hear Your song of silence<br />
in the dessert’s stillness<br />
and as the sun begins<br />
to set and the stars<br />
fill the night sky<br />
all becomes<br />
as a single<br />
soul.<br />
~01~
Transparent Moonbeams<br />
Naked rocky mountains<br />
cloak me in their majesty.<br />
A lone, parched acacia tree<br />
strives for survival.<br />
The desert,<br />
so still as an artist’s painting,<br />
cradles me in a thick, sublime silence.<br />
A rounded moon<br />
stealthily rises amongst the stars;<br />
Transparent moonbeams<br />
to illuminate my pathway home.<br />
~01~
A Greyscale Painting<br />
Rugged chalk cliffs<br />
clothed in colourful wild flowers,<br />
wild, grey-green ocean below me,<br />
white foam crested waves,<br />
crimson setting sun,<br />
scattered puffs<br />
of gold tinged clouds,<br />
dark blue sky with streaks<br />
of red and orange.<br />
Night falls<br />
and, as if <strong>by</strong> the wave<br />
of a magician’s wand,<br />
this once, multi-coloured scene<br />
transforms into an eerie grey-scale painting.<br />
~22~
A Door in the Wall<br />
I have found my very own hiding place<br />
deep within my imagination.<br />
A place far from war and terror,<br />
far from exploding rockets and air raid sirens.<br />
Through a creaking, wooden door,<br />
hidden behind brambles and ivy,<br />
I enter the garden of my dreams.<br />
A dancing waterfall sparkling<br />
in shafts of sunlight.<br />
Emerald green grass, soft and velvety.<br />
The myriad of colours in my garden<br />
soothe my tear-filled eyes.<br />
Birds swoop and circle in the open sky<br />
and I join them in their freedom.<br />
We can all have an imaginary garden,<br />
a haven to escape to in times of despair.<br />
The door in the wall will always be there,<br />
just waiting for us to open it.<br />
~25~
Shadow of a Butterfly<br />
An image flashes in my mind;<br />
an exquisite butterfly<br />
with orange, gossamer wings,<br />
searching for sweet nectar<br />
deep inside a welcoming flower.<br />
I have to capture this vision,<br />
give to it substance,<br />
share its innate beauty.<br />
Create a masterpiece<br />
from that flash of inspiration;<br />
the shadow of a butterfly.<br />
~20~
Birth of an Inspiration<br />
Butterfly lays an egg –<br />
birth of an inspiration.<br />
Egg hatches,<br />
caterpillar greedily munches leaves –<br />
inspiration mulled over in the mind.<br />
Fattened caterpillar weaves its cocoon,<br />
a place of preparation and change –<br />
plans formulated,<br />
inspiration becoming a reality.<br />
Time passes – chrysalis breaks open,<br />
beautiful butterfly unfolds its wings,<br />
takes flight –<br />
our inspiration, a fully fledged creation<br />
ready to take its place in the world.<br />
~22~
Little Grasshopper<br />
What can I learn from you, little grasshopper?<br />
A creature so small, so inconspicuous,<br />
yet at the moment of my confusion<br />
you appear with a message.<br />
You spring into the air<br />
not knowing where you will land.<br />
May be it is your simple faith;<br />
an instinct of knowing.<br />
So unlike me,<br />
I have to be prepared<br />
for every possible scenario<br />
before even taking the first step.<br />
Yes, you were sent to teach me so much.<br />
I have to learn to let go of my fears.<br />
Take a deep breath − give myself over to God.<br />
Accept where He takes me, what He gives me.<br />
Yes, little grasshopper,<br />
now I know why<br />
you came into my space.<br />
~22~
The Horseradish<br />
‘Horseradish’<br />
What a strange name!<br />
OK radish<br />
But horse!<br />
It doesn’t look like a horse,<br />
Sound like one,<br />
Move like one.<br />
It makes no sense.<br />
But so many things in life<br />
Don’t make sense<br />
So why should ‘horse radish’<br />
Well,<br />
I suppose a radish with a sore throat<br />
Could be called ‘hoarse’!<br />
~21~
A Very Contented Snail<br />
Hi, my name is Squirly<br />
and I am a very contented snail.<br />
You ask me why?<br />
Well I will show you.<br />
Come into my world,<br />
see it from my eyes.<br />
No house to pay for −<br />
mine came free at birth.<br />
No need for central heating −<br />
I find a warm compost heap.<br />
No air conditioning needed −<br />
I laze under a shady bush.<br />
No home maintenance,<br />
no plumbing leaks,<br />
power cuts or decorating.<br />
I don’t even need to plant my own food,<br />
go shopping nor earn a living.<br />
Fed up with location!<br />
I just up and go,<br />
no packing cases,<br />
no removal vans.<br />
~21~
I tell you,<br />
it’s one heck of a life<br />
and I enjoy every moment.<br />
Ok, maybe you get mad at me<br />
when I find your cabbages so delicious,<br />
but I am just doing what a snail<br />
was created to do!<br />
But it’s not all peace in my world.<br />
Birds love us for lunch<br />
and you people<br />
never look where you tread,<br />
but all in all<br />
it’s great being a snail<br />
leading the simple life.<br />
~21~
A Light so bright<br />
no eyes could withstand its intensity.<br />
A milliard sparks to form the universe<br />
taken from His candle
Take this Pen<br />
Oh, let my heart open<br />
that Your knowing<br />
can become my thoughts.<br />
Let me see through the illusions<br />
of form, to grasp the gossamer<br />
threads of truth.<br />
Take this pen in my hand<br />
and let it write of Your glory,<br />
tell of Your miracles<br />
in every moment of existence.<br />
But can I, a mortal,<br />
become a partner in Your design?<br />
~14~
Dancing on the Pages<br />
Letters,<br />
like musical notes,<br />
fall earthwards<br />
from heavenly harps.<br />
I feel their energy<br />
stir my soul<br />
and allow my pen<br />
to touch paper.<br />
Ink flows,<br />
forming words<br />
in a poetic dance<br />
to become part<br />
of God’s divine creation.<br />
My mind cannot create<br />
such beauty!<br />
I can only be a conduit<br />
from the Source beyond knowing;<br />
the treasure chest of limitless inspiration.<br />
~14~
Without Thought<br />
The whole world is a mosaic<br />
of sounds and colours<br />
to capture the imagination.<br />
But it is not these that stir my heart to write.<br />
Something far deeper fills me with emotion<br />
that cries to escape and embrace the world.<br />
So, as I put pen to paper,<br />
the words just flow without thought<br />
as if, somewhere beyond my mind,<br />
lies a wellspring of song that I tap into.<br />
Do I know what I am writing?<br />
Do I plan the lines?<br />
No, it has already been written in Heaven<br />
just waiting to be brought down to earth.<br />
~14~
Orchestra of Angels<br />
Seated in the Heavens<br />
they play the magical instruments of joy,<br />
a symphony of the Creator<br />
waiting to be heard <strong>by</strong> all mankind.<br />
Do we ever listen to this melody,<br />
tune into the orchestra of angels,<br />
allow their music to enter<br />
the vaults of our hearts?<br />
How can such discord exist in our world?<br />
So many musical notes, floating unheard,<br />
waft in the winds of war and destruction.<br />
Can mankind recreate the symphony<br />
of peace and harmony,<br />
sing the Creator’s songs,<br />
dance to the sounds of the falling rain,<br />
the rustle of leaves?<br />
We each have our own unique notes<br />
to unite Heaven and earth<br />
in perfect harmony.<br />
~11~
Here is the Key<br />
Behind an ancient rusty gate,<br />
hidden behind tangled brambles,<br />
lies the garden of my soul.<br />
Here is the key,<br />
I will lead you there –<br />
little steps<br />
gentle pace<br />
no rush.<br />
It is there for eternity;<br />
an oasis of tranquility.<br />
~14~
Cosmic Balance<br />
I float through life,<br />
dancing its twists and turns,<br />
giving − taking,<br />
coalescing into an amazing whole:<br />
the symphony of my soul,<br />
painted in the archives of creation.<br />
My joys and pains, laughter and tears,<br />
my days and nights, successes and failures<br />
all forming one destiny,<br />
veiled in the mysteries of cosmic balance.<br />
~14~
So Fragile<br />
There was a breeze,<br />
so gentle that it almost went unnoticed.<br />
So many have blown across my path,<br />
unseen, unfelt;<br />
lost inspirations and journeys never begun.<br />
Only in silence could my ears<br />
tune into the Divine and capture<br />
those fleeting moments of connection.<br />
So fragile – so illusive,<br />
yet in that flash of knowing<br />
is the knowledge<br />
that, when I am confused and trembling,<br />
love and joy<br />
from the shimmering Light above<br />
are always there around me.<br />
All I need do, is reach out<br />
and pull back the veil.<br />
.<br />
~14~
His Presence<br />
He pulls me through the dark,<br />
unlocks closed doors,<br />
opens curtained windows.<br />
Guides me<br />
past sleeping dogs,<br />
over bridges,<br />
through tunnels,<br />
never speaking – never slowing.<br />
Mesmerized into acceptance,<br />
His presence felt<br />
only through my knowing.<br />
In times of joy,<br />
in times of pain,<br />
He is always there.<br />
~14~
To Drink from His Gifts<br />
Cool fresh water gushes forth,<br />
HaShem’s light to cleanse my soul;<br />
a spring, hidden from view<br />
covered in layers of concealment.<br />
It quenches my thirst,<br />
fires my desires.<br />
I bathe in its purity<br />
unpolluted <strong>by</strong> man’s thoughts.<br />
I feel its coolness sustaining me<br />
in times of doubt and confusion.<br />
With my vessel open<br />
I can always drink from His gifts<br />
and fill my heart with amazement.<br />
~14~
My Soul Has a Voice<br />
Deep inside me,<br />
silence shines like a light<br />
throughout my being –<br />
beyond dreams,<br />
beyond knowing.<br />
Yet in that quiet<br />
my soul has a voice,<br />
words of wisdom<br />
thoughts of joy.<br />
No pain,<br />
no complaining,<br />
just a pure<br />
infinite source of love.<br />
~45~
Oasis of Tranquility<br />
I hear the noise of traffic<br />
yet my mind is in a deep, profound silence<br />
in the garden of my soul.<br />
I am at the centre of my being,<br />
I encompass the universe.<br />
I am the energy of crashing waves,<br />
of mighty rivers and gentle streams,<br />
as grounded as the base of a mountain,<br />
reaching heavenwards as the highest peak.<br />
The joy of being, of knowing,<br />
swirls like a blue mist around me.<br />
I fade into insignificance.<br />
I burst forth as blossom in spring.<br />
I’m at peace with myself,<br />
with the world.<br />
~44~
At the Kotel<br />
Incessant background chattering.<br />
Scraping sounds as chairs are shifted.<br />
A woman stops next to me,<br />
dials her cell phone,<br />
carries on an excited conversation.<br />
How can I concentrate on my prayers?<br />
I close my eyes.<br />
A breeze cools my over heated body<br />
and I am alone in the ancient Temple,<br />
moving silently into the Holy of Holies.<br />
I stand before the Ark of the Covenant<br />
and for a moment<br />
there is nothing but me,<br />
melted into the oneness of the Creator,<br />
my prayers no longer words,<br />
my love all encompassing.<br />
~44~
A Moonless Night<br />
Time of introspection –<br />
no light to reflect my image,<br />
only a glow emanating<br />
from my soul.<br />
How hard to accept simplicity,<br />
be true to myself.<br />
No acting out another’s dreams,<br />
no pretence of being someone else.<br />
Only me,<br />
in all innocence,<br />
hidden in the misty cloud<br />
of the unknown.<br />
~44~
Born to Dance<br />
Music flows through my limbs<br />
with such intensity, taking<br />
me to places<br />
beyond physical<br />
and emotional pain.<br />
I could fly across oceans,<br />
soar over mountain peaks<br />
as I take off in ecstatic motion.<br />
Bathed in the caressing rhythms<br />
of joyous light, streaming from above,<br />
my dance becomes a prayer of gratitude.<br />
~41~
A Particle of Dust<br />
I am a tiniest speck of being,<br />
no more than a particle of dust,<br />
imperceptible in the vastness<br />
of the universe.<br />
Yet I am unique.<br />
No one else is like me,<br />
never was,<br />
never will be again.<br />
My consciousness encompasses<br />
the moon, the stars,<br />
the oceans and rivers;<br />
all of creation.<br />
My soul is as radiant<br />
as the light from Heaven,<br />
no boundaries,<br />
no beginnings,<br />
no ends,<br />
eternal.<br />
~44~
Our Umbilical Cord<br />
Do we ever stop a moment<br />
to connect to our Source,<br />
sense His presence<br />
as we dance through our dreams?<br />
Hold His hand<br />
as we walk the tight-rope of life,<br />
feel His arms<br />
around us when in pain?<br />
Listen to the echo of His voice<br />
as He soothes our anger,<br />
hear the whispers of our destiny<br />
in our minds?<br />
He is <strong>by</strong> our side at every moment;<br />
a friend, a shadow, pure love −<br />
our umbilical cord to the river of creation.<br />
~44~
To Bask in His Glory<br />
HaShem,<br />
Speak to us,<br />
Guide us.<br />
Let Your forgiveness emanate from our hearts,<br />
Your wisdom speak through our lips,<br />
Your compassion radiate through our smiles,<br />
Your Light shine in our eyes.<br />
Your creativity seep through our fingertips.<br />
So many parts of the human form<br />
to express Your love,<br />
bring joy and harmony between peoples,<br />
take Your creation to its highest level<br />
and bask in the glory of Your desire.<br />
~44~
It Can Only Be Good<br />
I begin to write.<br />
A bizarre saga of bewilderment,<br />
pain and helplessness<br />
melts into one moment of truth –<br />
knowing that I am not in control<br />
nor have any idea<br />
of what the universe is planning.<br />
All I can do, is to give everything over to HaShem<br />
and believe that all is ‘perfect as is.’<br />
Tears of gratitude gush from deep within<br />
as my love flies across the oceans<br />
to all those involved in helping my son<br />
so far away from home.<br />
It is a story where I have grown so much<br />
and am ready to face whatever will happen<br />
with trust − for when all there is, is love,<br />
and all there is, is God<br />
then it can only be good.<br />
Written during the saga of my son’s traffic<br />
accident on a remote island of Indonesia.<br />
~44~
Love<br />
Let us see the Divine in all human beings,<br />
know there is a spark of purity in every soul.<br />
Open our hearts to give unconditionally,<br />
never expecting anything in return.<br />
Validate another’s feelings,<br />
empathize and never judge.<br />
Express our deepest connection to God,<br />
for how can we love ourselves<br />
if we cannot love God,<br />
and if we cannot love ourselves<br />
then how can we know love for another?<br />
~44~
Can I let go of all the building bricks<br />
that have made me who I am.<br />
Become as nothing.<br />
Re-create myself<br />
from a place<br />
of truth?
There in the corner of my life<br />
sits an old wizened sage<br />
whose face reflects<br />
the spirit of God,<br />
wise, humble<br />
full of grace.<br />
Oh how I wish<br />
I could draw<br />
him into my heart,<br />
absorb his wonder,<br />
radiate his warmth,<br />
adopt all that he stands for<br />
but my ego blocks him out<br />
so there, in the corner of my life,<br />
he patiently awaits my beckoning.<br />
~44~
I feel empty − closed,<br />
Your Divine Light hidden.<br />
Where are those crystals in my heart<br />
that once shone forth to the world?<br />
Their song has been sung.<br />
No more joy emits from their glow.<br />
I was so near<br />
yet just could not hold on.<br />
How can I bring back their vibrations?<br />
Feel the life force surge through my veins.<br />
But helplessness grabs hold of me.<br />
The Yetzer Hara has won the battle.<br />
His horsemen ride in triumph,<br />
my soul trampled under their horse’s hooves.<br />
Oh my Creator!<br />
You are my source of life.<br />
Give me the strength<br />
to fight my inner darkness.<br />
Guide me once more<br />
through the door to Your Palace.<br />
~41~
Snow clouds skim<br />
across the darkening sky,<br />
chased <strong>by</strong> a howling wind.<br />
Nowhere to hide,<br />
destination unknown.<br />
I shudder as I am caught<br />
in their turmoil.<br />
My heart pounds against my ribs,<br />
echoing the approaching storm.<br />
Yet stillness prevails;<br />
an all encompassing quiet<br />
stirs something deep in my soul.<br />
An awareness that<br />
I, too, am fleeing, urged on<br />
<strong>by</strong> a voice inside,<br />
afraid to take a moment of solitude.<br />
Can I ignore the storm?<br />
Go a place of tranquility<br />
and discover each unique snowflake<br />
that hides in my heart?<br />
~44~
Here is my pen,<br />
the paper ready to receive.<br />
Emotions and wonders<br />
cry to be expressed,<br />
but where are the words?<br />
I am frozen.<br />
Locked into my own little world<br />
of insecurity and fear.<br />
So much beauty and power<br />
awaits expression;<br />
a symphony of Divine Creation.<br />
But I taunt myself with only glimpses<br />
of Your Light that I fleetingly allow<br />
to penetrate the mist.<br />
~44~
My thoughts are entangled in a spider’s web.<br />
Inspiration clouded <strong>by</strong> a suffocating fog.<br />
What happened to my connection<br />
with the treasure chest of creativity?<br />
How can I reclaim those sparks of inspiration?<br />
I need let go of trying<br />
to break through the stifling silt,<br />
allow my river to find its own course.<br />
If I put pen to paper,<br />
perhaps only sadness would flow with the ink,<br />
words too heavy with all my dark emotions.<br />
Or, may be words of bliss will bubble forth,<br />
as if I were dancing on a rainbow,<br />
full of joyful celebration.<br />
~76~
A piece of white parchment<br />
aches to be covered with words –<br />
but I have none.<br />
I feel its emptiness, its sadness,<br />
yet how to record my feelings,<br />
open wounds so painstakingly closed off?<br />
I have built prison walls;<br />
no means of re-surfacing<br />
into my conscious awareness.<br />
They are safe there.<br />
I can go on with my life.<br />
Yet in my dreams<br />
the haunting memories replay their pain.<br />
So here, empty parchment,<br />
I will let my pen<br />
write from my heart.<br />
Will you be strong enough to receive<br />
all the traumas of the past?<br />
Can you contain the tears<br />
accompanying each word?<br />
Maybe, between you and me,<br />
a healing will take place.<br />
~76~
I stir fry my words<br />
of anger, sadness and pain.<br />
Add a shake of spices,<br />
a few chopped herbs.<br />
They sizzle and groan,<br />
seem too powerful,<br />
maybe even cruel.<br />
No! I want no part of this.<br />
I need a virgin creation<br />
from a place of divine inspiration.<br />
No fry up of meaningless animations.<br />
I want my words to echo<br />
to the song of the mountain,<br />
vibrate with the waterfall,<br />
rustle in unison with the autumn leaves.<br />
So turn off the flame,<br />
remove the wok,<br />
start again<br />
with fresh ingredients.<br />
~76~
Open a window<br />
I can’t breathe!<br />
The darkness stifles me.<br />
I want to scream<br />
but my yell comes out as a whisper.<br />
My limbs are locked into a spasm of despair.<br />
I am isolated,<br />
imprisoned in my own cell<br />
with myself as the jailer.<br />
Yet there are no walls,<br />
no shutters need to be opened.<br />
Light infuses my whole being<br />
and my body can move<br />
as freely as the leopard,<br />
leaping across the plain.<br />
The key to my freedom<br />
lies within reach<br />
but I cannot, dare not grasp it.<br />
I am just too afraid to be myself.<br />
~67~
I’m groping for a strong foothold<br />
but all I’m doing is slipping and sliding<br />
in the same old mud hole,<br />
churning it up but unable to get out.<br />
A voice screams –<br />
“Get out of your mind.<br />
Open the door to your beautiful self.<br />
Don’t be frightened.<br />
Nothing can harm you<br />
when you listen to your heart.<br />
It is a pure, shining light<br />
and can guide you with great wisdom.<br />
Not the loud pounding words of desire,<br />
but the voice’ that you will hear<br />
when your mind is emptied<br />
of all the nonsense and trivialities<br />
that now fills every corner.<br />
Then you will no longer feel<br />
that you are drowning in the mud.<br />
You will be free to fly on the wind.”<br />
~67~
Corridors of my life –<br />
so many doors to be opened,<br />
yet I freeze at every one.<br />
I panic − heart races − stomach in knots<br />
"No not this one!"<br />
I walk on.<br />
Keep going – no stopping.<br />
I reach a dead end,<br />
nowhere to go.<br />
Feeling helpless<br />
I give up the struggle.<br />
A door appears − opens <strong>by</strong> itself<br />
displaying the tangled thoughts<br />
of my mind.<br />
A silent scream!<br />
My hands reach out to take hold of my faith.<br />
I walk boldly forwards.<br />
~67~
I have misplaced the key −<br />
no, I have hidden it from my heart.<br />
It is the key to my knowing.<br />
Why do I block my happiness?<br />
If I knew the secret,<br />
my soul would be freed from its prison.<br />
I would soar on the wind,<br />
dance with the swaying trees,<br />
express my love for the Creator<br />
with every fibre of my being.<br />
Every cell would reflect His Light.<br />
Sublime words would flow through my lips.<br />
But I dare not expose myself to this ecstasy.<br />
How could I contain its power?<br />
I have the tools<br />
but am just too afraid to use them.<br />
~67~
I put the key into the lock,<br />
yet dare I open the door?<br />
What will I find beyond this barrier?<br />
But is the door a reality<br />
or just my mind’s own creation,<br />
a protection from knowing myself<br />
locked so many years ago?<br />
Today I am wiser,<br />
have greater courage.<br />
Yet is my trust in the Creator<br />
strong enough to combat my fear?<br />
The door creeks,<br />
a musty smell hangs in the air;<br />
cobwebs and dust of my past.<br />
A light appears in the far corner of the room,<br />
draws me towards itself,<br />
and I see a smiling child – myself so long ago.<br />
I open my arms,<br />
she runs up to me.<br />
We hug, united with unconditional acceptance<br />
after so many years of separation.<br />
~67~
I cannot let go!<br />
I need to hold tight onto my imaginary life-line;<br />
the ‘me’ with whom I am so familiar<br />
with all her fears, pains, failures,<br />
judgments and criticisms.<br />
How would it be<br />
if I just floated down the river of life<br />
without all the handholds<br />
that I have built into the river bank?<br />
I can sense it would be a journey<br />
with a trust so strong,<br />
that I would no longer dread the unknown,<br />
no longer fear a metamorphosed ‘me’<br />
that is now so illusive.<br />
I know she is there in the background,<br />
yearning to emerge from her concealment.<br />
~67~
As a child there was a force<br />
deep within my core,<br />
a fire burning so powerfully,<br />
exploding into myriad stars<br />
of love and joy –<br />
an endless vessel of desires.<br />
But now the embers smolder<br />
in painful recognition<br />
of what they could have become.<br />
They patiently wait for me<br />
to find the courage<br />
to allow shafts of air to rush in<br />
and re-kindle the flames.<br />
So much creative energy<br />
is crying to be released.<br />
My whole being could again<br />
be filled with passion,<br />
and who knows to where I could fly.<br />
~67~
I search the seas<br />
Sail my ship across the oceans<br />
Look into others eyes<br />
Steal their treasures<br />
But I cannot find my truth.<br />
How many years will I spend on my journey?<br />
No peace, no stopping,<br />
on and on I drive myself<br />
searching for something I know is there.<br />
Great treasures already captured<br />
but still I find no peace.<br />
In my mind I see a chest<br />
and slowly open the lid.<br />
Nothing!<br />
But in the stillness of the emptiness<br />
I hear a gentle voice.<br />
“I am your treasure, I am your truth.<br />
You have only to ask and listen.<br />
Capture the gossamer thread of wisdom<br />
that you hear before your mind steps in.”<br />
~66~
The clouds part<br />
and for a moment I see the sun.<br />
Life feels good,<br />
my heart fills with song,<br />
a dance is choreographed within my soul.<br />
I have come back into the world of Light.<br />
But a voice of pain and deep-seated fear<br />
cries out from within.<br />
“Remember me?<br />
Don’t abandon your shadow,<br />
I am the real you.<br />
It is not safe to be so open and free.”<br />
It pulls, coerces.<br />
I fight but in the end I accede<br />
and the blue sky disappears<br />
behind a mountain of blackened thunderclouds.<br />
I crumple into a bundle of grey nothingness,<br />
aware of the joy that I am capable of feeling<br />
but cannot find the courage to hold on to.<br />
~66~
It hits me like a flood –<br />
one fearful thought has managed to escape<br />
the net and explode into the physical.<br />
I try to fight it.<br />
“Relax, think of something pleasurable”<br />
but it is too late, the floodgates have opened;<br />
churning stomach – pounding heart<br />
all the pain of an anxiety attack.<br />
Yet, within the torture I inflict on myself,<br />
I hear a small voice.<br />
“Go with the tide,<br />
take its full force<br />
you cannot hold back the waters”<br />
I silently speak to this unrelenting power.<br />
“Come on, show me how much stronger you can get.<br />
Give me more.<br />
You can do better than that!”<br />
Suddenly something strange happens.<br />
The storm abates instead of overwhelming me.<br />
A state of calm returns.<br />
~66~
An empty pot sits on the stove,<br />
its emptiness a space for hope.<br />
For how can a new adventure begin<br />
if it were still filled with yesterday’s vegetables?<br />
No space for change!<br />
No space for growth!<br />
Now it waits in anticipation.<br />
May be an exotic stew or delicate apple sauce?<br />
So many possibilities present in its nakedness.<br />
If only I could emulate this pot.<br />
Cleanse myself from yesterday’s leftovers.<br />
Create a space for God’s wisdom.<br />
To merge with the pot’s emptiness<br />
could be so simple, yet so hard to do!<br />
~67~
I will not delve into my pain!<br />
I will not let darkness enter my stage!<br />
Now my play will be one of beauty,<br />
no more depression, anger and fear.<br />
Only joy and love will be portrayed.<br />
Excited I will awaken each morning,<br />
a smile etched on my face,<br />
my eyes shining with passion for life.<br />
I will flow graciously down my river,<br />
grateful for wherever it takes me.<br />
What an amazing performance it could be!<br />
And all this is possible −<br />
the key is here in my mind.<br />
My thoughts are really capable<br />
of creating such positive emotions.<br />
So why write a script of sadness and despair<br />
when I hold the power<br />
to bring myself to a different reality?<br />
~67~
Where is my song hiding?<br />
I feel so closed, so cold.<br />
I languish in a quagmire<br />
of tangled thoughts and emotions<br />
trying to become the person<br />
my intellect tells me I should be.<br />
Oh spirit, come out of your closet.<br />
Let me hear your transcendent voice,<br />
understand your words of wisdom.<br />
Let me enter the celestial chambers of my heart.<br />
A silent voice screams from within −<br />
“Just Be!<br />
Life can be so simple.<br />
See the Creator’s hand<br />
in every moment of life.”<br />
I open my eyes,<br />
tune into the sounds of nature,<br />
listen to the unspoken words<br />
of the rustling leaves,<br />
let go of attachments<br />
and the need to be in control.<br />
Now the song of my soul<br />
with its own unique notes<br />
can be free, in all its glory,<br />
to join the orchestra of creation.<br />
~67~
Am I seeking to return<br />
to my place of safety?<br />
No, I am leaving that behind.<br />
Now I want to fly −<br />
spread my wings to encompass the earth<br />
as a pulsating light bursting forth.<br />
I want to capture creation in all its beauty,<br />
share the amazement felt<br />
at every moment of connection,<br />
and never again sink back<br />
into the shadow of my existence.<br />
~67~
The beauty<br />
in an artistic creation<br />
will be lost unless shared with others.<br />
A diamond<br />
kept hidden away in a safe<br />
might just as well be a black stone<br />
if its essence is never revealed.
Soft Grey Clay<br />
Potter’s tools.<br />
A block of soft, grey clay.<br />
Can I transform this lifeless lump<br />
into an object of beauty and spirit?<br />
My fingers begin to knead aimlessly,<br />
sensing the smooth, malleable texture,<br />
wondering what it will become.<br />
My photo, dancing as a child,<br />
comes to mind.<br />
Can I capture my exhilaration<br />
as I took that leap?<br />
Am I capable of creating<br />
such a graceful figure?<br />
My hands connect to a place deep within,<br />
open the gate to HaShem’s creative Light.<br />
Slowly my lump of clay takes on a human form.<br />
Delicate limbs, movement, poise.<br />
Even my ballet dress takes shape!<br />
I am within the folds of clay,<br />
breathing its energy,<br />
till I release my hands<br />
and gaze in amazement!<br />
~44~
Virgin Canvas<br />
Pot of brushes, tubes of paint,<br />
a sheet of blank paper that looks back at me<br />
as I stare at its emptiness −<br />
“Take a chance,” I hear.<br />
“Choose any brush, dip it in any colour.<br />
Just let it dance across the paper<br />
and see where it will take you.”<br />
I squeeze one colour after another onto my palette.<br />
An unseen hand seems to guide my brush<br />
as vibrant colours streak across the canvas.<br />
Oh, the ecstasy of creativity!<br />
~44~
And then I Remembered<br />
Black, star studded sky,<br />
my favorite music playing,<br />
secluded hotel balcony<br />
facing the Dead Sea.<br />
What more could I ask for?<br />
I begin to dance −<br />
leaping, twirling,<br />
filled with ecstasy.<br />
And then I remember my mother,<br />
suffering from Alzheimer’s disease.<br />
Her pains, fears and confusion,<br />
her constant need for my reassurance<br />
and here I am, in a state of joy,<br />
whilst her world is crumbling around her.<br />
My heart opens,<br />
tears flow as never before.<br />
My love for her, at this moment<br />
reaches a place beyond time and space.<br />
She is in my arms, sharing my dance.<br />
~44~
Eternal Love<br />
A world washed with tears;<br />
my world in all its sadness,<br />
a mother lost – friend, teacher,<br />
never to be replaced.<br />
Your soul is now united with its Creator,<br />
flying on His wings,<br />
free from suffering and fears.<br />
Do I really want you drawn back<br />
into this illusion of reality<br />
just for my comfort?<br />
Tears flow when I remember the love I felt<br />
as I watched over your frail body.<br />
You lay so still, so helpless,<br />
yet our souls touched in a place of great beauty,<br />
a place beyond pain and despair.<br />
I knew you were not coming back to us,<br />
it was only a matter of time,<br />
but time stood still<br />
as I stroked your shrunken frame.<br />
I felt such a yearning<br />
to embrace you with my whole being,<br />
~45~
to absorb your wisdom<br />
that I had never acknowledged,<br />
and to cherish your life<br />
lived with only your family in mind.<br />
Mum, I have always loved you<br />
but the love that I felt during those last days<br />
went beyond time and space,<br />
beyond words and mortal expression.<br />
An eternal love of two souls.<br />
~44~
Welcome<br />
Welcome little one<br />
into the reality of this world.<br />
Your physical body,<br />
a tiny form for your pure soul to use<br />
on its voyage throughout this lifetime.<br />
No one knows where your journey will take you.<br />
Only your deepest knowing has this truth.<br />
May you always connect to this awareness<br />
that will keep you on the path of righteousness.<br />
May your heart overflow with love<br />
for the Creator.<br />
May His light always shine from your eyes<br />
to bring joy to all around you.<br />
I bless you, little ba<strong>by</strong>,<br />
with an abundance of goodness<br />
to see you on your way.<br />
~44~
Do Not Feel Sad for Me<br />
When I leave this world,<br />
please do not feel sad for me,<br />
for I will be with God, within His Holy Light,<br />
my soul flowing freely across time.<br />
My perilous journey through this lifetime<br />
will have reached its destination,<br />
my body no longer needed.<br />
The pain you feel,<br />
the tears rising up<br />
from deep within your heart<br />
are for the loss of the presence<br />
of my physical form.<br />
You cry because my laughter<br />
no longer fills your heart,<br />
my smile no longer brightens your day.<br />
Exchange your sorrow for thanksgiving.<br />
Thank HaShem for the gift he lent you<br />
for all those years.<br />
Please do not feel sad for me.<br />
Listen to the birds.<br />
Drink in the beauty and fragrances<br />
of all the flowers that carpet the earth.<br />
Enjoy God’s gifts of life<br />
until He will carry you across the river<br />
to be <strong>by</strong> my side once again.<br />
~44~
I Won’t Give Up<br />
Oh my computer,<br />
you are taking over my life!<br />
I can’t let go.<br />
I could simply turn you off<br />
but I am hooked.<br />
What happened to the masterpiece<br />
I am working on?<br />
It just disappeared.<br />
Press this key − then another and another.<br />
Now black screen No sound<br />
Stomach turns somersaults.<br />
Keep rebooting.<br />
A message – sigh of relief<br />
till I read what it says,<br />
‘Volume not recognized.’<br />
I scour my computer books,<br />
phone the technician,<br />
try everything he suggests.<br />
I won’t give up<br />
but <strong>by</strong> three o’clock in the morning<br />
sleep overpowers.<br />
~41~
A new day.<br />
I keep trying<br />
but in the end I accede defeat.<br />
The technician arrives.<br />
Says he has to take you away;<br />
“It will take a few days”<br />
You are gone – I am lost,<br />
my fingers yearning to dance<br />
on your keyboard.<br />
You return.<br />
Such happiness – or is it?<br />
Again I am out of control,<br />
hours in front of the screen – your slave.<br />
But how can I let you,<br />
a mere machine, be my master?<br />
Click ‘Turn Off’ and you are nothing.<br />
But oh,<br />
such a hard thing to do!<br />
~44~
Choices<br />
Black shoes?<br />
No, I asked for the brown!<br />
“We don’t have your size in brown,<br />
only in black or beige.”<br />
The saleslady brings both.<br />
“I also have this different style in brown.”<br />
Dilemma – I like them all.<br />
So which ones to buy?<br />
Panic –<br />
My stomach knots,<br />
I feel sick,<br />
must get out of the shop.<br />
Leave the decision for another day.<br />
I don’t really need new shoes,<br />
the old will do −<br />
but they hurt and are shab<strong>by</strong>.<br />
So buy a new pair.<br />
But which?<br />
Back to the shop.<br />
“Why not take all three?<br />
I can give you a discount.”<br />
~44~
Oh no! that just adds another choice;<br />
brown – black – beige − all three and save money.<br />
But I don’t need three!<br />
So choose one.<br />
Stomach knots again,<br />
I have to get away – no decision.<br />
Yet ‘no decision’ is also a choice.<br />
Now I have five possibilities!<br />
Help!<br />
So make up your mind and stick to it.<br />
Close your eyes.<br />
Ask yourself what you really want.<br />
Catch that quietest first reply<br />
before all other thoughts rush in.<br />
I ask − I listen<br />
“The brown,”<br />
But what about the black, beige or all three!<br />
No, I silently reply.<br />
I buy the brown.<br />
~44~
Patience<br />
Why can’t she make up her mind?<br />
She’s driving me crazy!<br />
How many shoes does she need to try on?<br />
Is she going to be here all day?<br />
Can I see those ones too?<br />
My patience is rapidly ebbing −<br />
“Ok, I will check if we have you size.”<br />
Up the ladder again.<br />
My poor aging knees!<br />
“Here you are my dear.<br />
Yes? You like them?”<br />
I pray silently to not strangle her if she says NO.<br />
I like them all.<br />
I just can’t decide which ones to buy.<br />
She can’t decide − She likes them all!<br />
Why didn’t she just buy the very first pair?<br />
Who is going to put all these boxes away?<br />
Me of course!<br />
May be I will come back tomorrow.<br />
“Yes, good idea − come back tomorrow.”<br />
Three deep breaths.<br />
May I never see her again!<br />
~44~
India<br />
Army of sounds<br />
Tapestry of colours<br />
. Astonishing to the western eye.<br />
Smiles abound<br />
A helping hand ever extended<br />
Beggars pleading for food<br />
Spiritual incantations to stir the heart.<br />
Colourful rickshaws, taxis, cars, buses, bicycles,<br />
motorbikes carrying whole families<br />
hoot their way through the crowded streets,<br />
shared with seemingly oblivious dogs,<br />
cows, donkeys, ox and camel carts<br />
and even the occasional elephant.<br />
Aroma of spices,<br />
curries , chapattis, samosa, dosa...<br />
A multitude of foods<br />
to entice one’s taste buds.<br />
Families living in tents on the streets,<br />
a backdrop of luxury housing.<br />
An un-orchestrated symphony of life.<br />
~44~
Overwhelmed<br />
I stand at the edge of a steep drop.<br />
Far below, through the white sandy desert,<br />
meanders a muddy grey river.<br />
Barren mountains soar high above me,<br />
each with its own personality<br />
of colours and shape,<br />
some with snow capped peaks<br />
glistening under the deep blue sky.<br />
I am rooted to the ground,<br />
filled with a surge of emotion<br />
that penetrates through every fiber of my being.<br />
My hands reach upwards as if seeking God<br />
to embrace Him with love for the gift<br />
of this experience.<br />
Tears of gratitude flow uncontrollably<br />
as I think of all the sick, disabled, poverty stricken<br />
who will never have the opportunity<br />
to witness this view.<br />
I feel so small, so humbled.<br />
On a mountain pass in the Himalayas, India.<br />
~455~
A Magical Moment in Mongolia<br />
The sun has just broken the morning sky,<br />
peering from behind the granite mountains,<br />
sending its warmth across the green valley<br />
to relieve the cold of the Mongolian night.<br />
Wrapped in layers,<br />
I venture out of the Nomad’s ger<br />
to make my way,<br />
in the still silence of the early hours,<br />
to the near<strong>by</strong> golden sand dunes.<br />
My shoes, soaked in the glistening dew<br />
that carpets the grass, become caked with sand<br />
as I climb and slide, up to the highest point.<br />
I pray in a state of awe,<br />
sensing only the presence of God<br />
in the three hundred and sixty degree vista<br />
that my eyes are blessed to witness.<br />
Stirred <strong>by</strong> a force from within,<br />
I take off in joyful dance –<br />
not so easy in the soft sand,<br />
but my body flies, as if a feather,<br />
as I celebrate this moment of connection<br />
to the Divine and His magical Creation.<br />
~454~
Beyond Labels<br />
A beggar hassles me,<br />
pleads for money,<br />
does not leave me alone.<br />
I get aggravated,<br />
anger takes over,<br />
I shoo him away like a dog.<br />
I forget he has a soul like mine,<br />
indeed we could have been in opposite roles.<br />
Maybe we were in previous lifetimes.<br />
Can I ever know how he feels?<br />
The anguish I have caused him,<br />
treating him with disdain.<br />
Do I stop and acknowledge that he, too,<br />
has a history, family, friends, pains and joys?<br />
For me, at this moment, he is just an annoyance.<br />
Oh how I need to work on my emotions,<br />
see far beyond his label as ’beggar,’<br />
beyond my automatic feelings<br />
of contempt and disregard.<br />
Yet showing compassion<br />
can so easily inflate my ego,<br />
make me feel superior!<br />
~454~
He is a human being who ‘begs ‘<br />
just as I am a human being who ‘writes poetry,’<br />
Beyond our labels<br />
we are the same, from the same Source,<br />
just complementing each other<br />
in fulfilling the Divine cycle<br />
of giving and receiving.<br />
~454~
Stop a Moment<br />
Streets full of people yet he is alone,<br />
shunned <strong>by</strong> society, an outcast,<br />
unable to earn his living.<br />
He sits − silently<br />
with outstretched hand<br />
to feel a coin or two.<br />
He has no one to talk to,<br />
no one stops to inquire,<br />
no one gives a moment’s thought<br />
to acknowledge him<br />
as a fellow human being −<br />
even a dog receives more attention!<br />
Yet he knows so much,<br />
has learnt the wisdoms of truth.<br />
He lives in a world<br />
away from all our hi-tec distractions,<br />
our time based society.<br />
He truly sees the beauty in a tiny flower<br />
and hears the joy in a bird’s morning song.<br />
So many free pleasures in this world<br />
to feel gratitude for.<br />
~451~
He’s awakened <strong>by</strong> the first rays<br />
of the rising sun,<br />
dancing on his sleeping eyelids,<br />
whilst we are still asleep in our beds.<br />
He may have no shoes<br />
but we have no idea the joy he experiences<br />
walking barefoot on dew-carpeted grass.<br />
So please, next time you pass him <strong>by</strong>,<br />
stop a moment,<br />
look him in the eye,<br />
exchange a few words<br />
to lighten the isolation he feels.<br />
He may have a gift to share.<br />
~454~
A Surreal Scene<br />
In the last rays of the setting sun,<br />
storm clouds speed across the sky.<br />
Flashes of lightening<br />
illuminate the darkening horizon.<br />
Thunder echoes from the surrounding hills.<br />
Suddenly a deafening squawking emanates<br />
from the forest across the lake.<br />
A black cloud lifts up from the trees,<br />
spreads out like on opening fan.<br />
Bats!<br />
Thousands of them...<br />
A surreal scene,<br />
forever etched in my memory.<br />
Lake Kunanara, NW Australia<br />
~454~
Jerusalem<br />
Screaming − smell of burning<br />
“Oh no, our Holy Temple!”<br />
What’s happening?<br />
What do mother’s words mean?<br />
What’s happening to the Temple?<br />
I feel her comforting arms around me,<br />
her tears cascading onto my face.<br />
“The Romans − we must leave.<br />
Hold onto my hand and don’t let go."<br />
We run − I see panic all around me.<br />
A haze of smoke blankets the once clear blue sky.<br />
Exhausted we find a small cave to shelter in.<br />
Brutally we are dragged from our hiding place,<br />
led into captivity, exiled from our homeland.<br />
Jerusalem is destroyed,<br />
the Jewish people scattered.<br />
*<br />
Yet, beneath all the sorrow and pain<br />
for over two thousand years,<br />
a beacon of hope burned in our hearts;<br />
a yearning to return to our land<br />
and rebuild our holy city.<br />
And indeed, we have at last come home.<br />
~454~
To the Kotel<br />
Tallit blowing in the wind,<br />
he raced towards the Kotel.<br />
Not knowing why,<br />
but aware that a profound yearning<br />
had propelled him out of a deep slumber<br />
before the sun had broken the horizon.<br />
In the eeriness of dawn,<br />
no thoughts entered his mind<br />
as he raced through the narrow lanes<br />
of the Old City of Jerusalem.<br />
His heart pounded against his ribs<br />
like a soldier’s drum urging him onwards.<br />
His eyes did not notice<br />
the alley-cats searching for open dustbins,<br />
nor the bearded men, with prayer shawls<br />
draped over their shoulders,<br />
making their way to morning prayers.<br />
His only awareness –<br />
a need to touch the stones of the Kotel,<br />
the unfulfilled dream of his ancestors.<br />
~454~
Our Eyes Meet<br />
Our eyes meet.<br />
A fear exists between us.<br />
Our egos say<br />
“You are my enemy<br />
I cannot trust you.”<br />
But let’s go beyond these reactions,<br />
look at each other from the heart,<br />
from a place beyond thinking.<br />
Feel each other’s essence.<br />
Know our oneness.<br />
We can hear the same music,<br />
look at the same painting,<br />
feel the same pain,<br />
laugh and smile with the same joy.<br />
Only our minds<br />
dictate our perception of separateness.<br />
You, me, they,<br />
don’t exist beyond thought.<br />
Amman, Jordan<br />
~454~
Cry of the Earth<br />
My tears cascade down waterfalls.<br />
My sobs reverberate in the rumble of thunder.<br />
How long will I have to drink the blood of the slain,<br />
listen to the screams of the persecuted,<br />
be scarred <strong>by</strong> the ravages of war?<br />
I am such a beautiful planet,<br />
full of colours, sounds and perfumes −<br />
an abundance of gifts to bring joy to mankind.<br />
I have so much to give,<br />
yet am abused − my forests raped,<br />
rivers poisoned, atmosphere polluted,<br />
my resources used for weapons of destruction.<br />
All I can do, is vision a time<br />
when tolerance, respect, love and compassion<br />
will bring the illusive peace<br />
that I have yearned for from time immemorial.<br />
~445~
Imagination<br />
While my body rests,<br />
my imagination can take me<br />
over the horizon<br />
to places beyond my dreams.<br />
Turquoise seas and silver sands.<br />
I swim and dive with dolphins<br />
deep beneath the ocean’s surface.<br />
Or, as music plays, I am ice skating,<br />
choreographing my own dance<br />
as I twirl, leap, speed around the rink.<br />
Such exhilarating experiences<br />
and all this only in my mind!<br />
~444~
My Story<br />
I am from a place of infinite beauty<br />
beyond the realm of knowing.<br />
I entered this world some seven decades ago.<br />
A woman’s screams shattered my reverie.<br />
A pulsating pressure<br />
squeezed me through a narrow, dark tunnel.<br />
A sudden blinding light,<br />
a sharp pain<br />
and I let out my first of many cries.<br />
I was frightened, confused and cold.<br />
Then, swathed in something warm,<br />
I felt a gentle caress<br />
and an energy full of love flowed into me,<br />
as when I was floating<br />
in the cradling liquid of my mother’s womb.<br />
I was at the beginning<br />
of my voyage of discovery and re-remembering,<br />
a story of overcoming challenges,<br />
of love story,<br />
a story of loss,<br />
a travel story of adventures.<br />
~444~
Many threads were woven together<br />
to bring me to the place I am now,<br />
to the person I have become −<br />
a tapestry of colours, textures and designs.<br />
From generation upon generation<br />
as far back as the first moment of creation,<br />
as far forwards to the end of time,<br />
I am an eternal being, as all beings,<br />
in the timeless theatre of the Creator.<br />
~444~
Glossary<br />
HaShem<br />
The Kotel<br />
Tallit<br />
Yetzer Hara<br />
Hebrew name of God implying loving<br />
kindness and often used in my poems<br />
as a more personal relationship.<br />
The section of the Western supporting<br />
wall of the Temple Mount that has<br />
remained intact since the destruction<br />
of the Second Temple <strong>by</strong> the Romans<br />
in 70 C.E. It became the most sacred<br />
spot in Jewish religious consciousness<br />
<strong>by</strong> virtue of its proximity to the ‘Holy<br />
of Holies’, the central focus in the<br />
Temple.<br />
Fringed, white shawl worn <strong>by</strong> Jewish<br />
men at prayer.<br />
Hebrew for one’s evil inclination.<br />
~552~