The Workbook

BE MORE
tomorrow
THAN YOU ARE
today.
THE WORKBOOK
chris@chrisdudley.co.uk
chrisdudley.co.uk

HI, I’M CHRIS,
I’M A LIFE COACH
I design bespoke programmes for those seeking to change
and achieve balance and success in all areas of their life.
You’ve identified you’re facing one or more challenges in
your life and not achieving the balance and success you
deserve. Maybe you aren’t living the life you aspire to,
you’ve not reached your full potential and you feel held
back by your past. You have limiting beliefs about yourself
and what you can achieve, and when you review your life in
its entirety you feel overwhelmed and stuck. You’re procrastinating
and you know it, yet you can’t connect to the motivation you need to move on.
I’m pleased you are ready to take control of your current situation, and gain a
greater understanding of who you are; what you want the freedom to achieve; and
exactly how to do it. I’m excited that you, like me, are passionate and committed to
be more tomorrow than you are today.
YOUR WORKBOOK
I’m so pleased you’ve chosen to use my workbook which was created in order to support
you in achieving four key objectives, to understand:
• Where you are
• Who you are
• Where you want to be
• What’s holding you back and breaking free
Your workbook aims to move you out of overwhelm and in to control. Supporting you in
in identifying your negative thoughts and your limiting beliefs. You’ll have the opportunity
to design your future and set goals which you’ll make a commitment to achieve. I guide
you, and provide you the learning, tools and techniques you need to begin to achieve
balance and success in all areas of your life.
My clients benefit from taking their workbook to the next level by choosing to work
with me, making an immediate investment in their future and a clear action to take
responsibility now. If you, like my private clients, would benefit from my one-to-one
support and guidance; please contact me.
Until next we meet… be more tomorrow than you are today!
2

Where
YOU ARE
3

WHERE YOU ARE
A note from your coach...
Life can sometimes overwhelm us and lead us to feel quite simply like our computer,
with too many tabs open. I’m sure you’ve had that feeling of working on too many items
at once and not seeming to complete anything, either in the time you wanted or to the
standard you aim to deliver.
Equally, you may feel like life is going well, you have all the elements you think you’re
supposed to have, like the partner, the children, the house, the car and the other
trappings that society uses to define success. But something just isn’t quite right and you
can’t put your finger on it, you can’t seem to locate the right tab.
As you begin your journey to discover more about yourself we must first stop... and
review your life.
Reviewing all aspects of your life and honestly evaluating them supports you in gaining a
greater understanding of where you should be focusing your energy. Defining the areas
of your life you are happy with is very rewarding, allowing you to take your foot off the
pedal and coast for a little bit as you move your concentration to the areas of your life
that you may have inadvertently neglected.
4

WHERE YOU ARE | WHEEL OF LIFE
5

WHERE YOU ARE | BASIC HUMAN NEEDS
A note from your coach...
You have a duty to understand yourself as much as you possibly can. It’s also crucial to
understand which of your basic human needs are being met. Often my clients will share
with me the fantastic lives they have lived and are living. Having completed their Wheel
of Life they will score themselves highly in the majority of areas, not identifying any of
the specified areas as lacking. That’s the reason I’ve included the Basic Human Needs
activity in your workbook. It is this activity which will often identify the cause of discomfort
many are facing outside of the specific areas of their life.
ASSESSING YOUR BASIC HUMAN NEEDS
I have listed the 6 Basic Human Needs below and I’d like you to consider which of these
are currently being met in your life and which you’d like to work on.
CERTAINTY
First of all, we need certainty in our lives. When we are certain about how things work
and how others behave we can predict what will happen in the future and so feel safe.
When we are certain about others, we can trust them. When we feel safe, we can relax
and reduce our constant scanning for threats.
UNCERTAINTY
While certainty is important, too much is boring. We also want stimulation and novelty
to add interest and fun to our lives. This is why people try new things, take risks and
gamble, even when they do not need to do so.
SIGNIFICANCE
We need meaning in our lives and want our lives to have purpose and direction.
We want to be important and for others to look up to us. We may gain this in many
different ways, from becoming well-qualified to being friendly and helping others.
6

CONNECTION
Without company, we easily get lonely. We are social animals and connecting with
other people is important for us. In this way, we bond with others as we form friends
and extend our sense of who we are. Just as uncertainty balances certainty, so outer
connection with others balances the inner need for significance of the self.
GROWTH
Beyond fulfilling the previous needs, we want to learn and become more than we are.
For this purpose we study and want to develop our careers. As a higher need, we can
live without it and some people seek little in way of growth, while others are highly
motivated to make something more of themselves.
CONTRIBUTION
Combining growth and connection, contribution takes into account other people and
the world at large. If we are active in contributing to other individuals and groups,
rather than just ‘belonging’, we increase our connection with them and it feel good as
our sense of identity is expanded.
Score each human need out of 10, where 10 means this need is being completely met
with no need for improvement.
CERTAINTY
UNCERTAINTY/ VARIETY
SIGNIFICANCE
CONNECTION/LOVE
GROWTH
CONTRIBUTION
7

8
Who
YOU ARE

WHO YOU ARE
A note from your coach...
Personality type questionnaires and similar assessments can sometimes have you feeling
like you’re being forced into a box, but my intention is not to remove all the areas
that make you the unique person you are. The personality type and learning styles
questionnaires which follow act only to identify your strengths and development areas;
presenting an opportunity to celebrate what makes you great and work on the areas that
will directly impact you in achieving the balance and success you deserve.
“Knowing others is intelligence, knowing yourself is true wisdom.”
LAO TZU
The assessments I have selected are industry recognised and respected around the
World. After each assessment I have included a short overview of each personality type
and learning style in order that you can review your results. This information you will
learn about yourself in this section will greatly raise your self-awareness and support you
in making choices which best suit you, your personality and your natural style. See these
short assessments as another step in discovering more about yourself and what makes
you who you are, but not who you’ll be.
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WHO YOU ARE | UNDERSTANDING YOUR PERSONALITY TYPE
Understanding your personality type like never before can support you to discover how
you can use your strengths to create a happy and satisfying life.
Isabel Briggs Myers created the sixteen personality types with the help of her mother,
Katharine Briggs, and the theories of psychologist Carl Jung. Since then, much research
has been done into how each type functions at work, at home, and in relationships.
Following completion of your simple Personality Types Questionnaire utilise the
personality type code you discover and head to the section with your code in order to
learn a little bit more about yourself.
Want to know more about your
personality type and how you can select
a career that matches your personality?
Head to chrisdudley.co.uk to request your
personality type career insights report.
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WHO YOU ARE | PERSONALITY TYPE QUESTIONNAIRE
For each statement select the appropriate box from options A and B.
Tick whichever response is most naturally like you?
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For each statement select the appropriate box from options A and B.
Tick whichever response is most naturally like you?
12

For each statement select the appropriate box from options A and B.
Tick whichever response is most naturally like you?
13

For each statement select the appropriate box from options A and B.
Tick whichever response is most naturally like you?
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SCORING GUIDANCE
15

WORK OUT YOUR SCORE
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ENFJ - THE TEACHER
ENFJs are idealist organizers, driven to implement their vision of what is best for humanity.
They often act as catalysts for human growth because of their ability to see potential in
other people and their charisma in persuading others to their ideas. They are focused on
values and vision, and are passionate about the possibilities for people.
ENFJs are typically energetic and driven, and often have a lot on their plates. They are
tuned into the needs of others and acutely aware of human suffering; however, they also
tend to be optimistic and forward-thinking, intuitively seeing opportunity for improvement.
The ENFJ is ambitious, but their ambition is not self-serving: rather, they feel personally
responsible for making the world a better place.
ENTJ - THE COMMANDER
ENTJs are strategic leaders, motivated to organize change. They are quick to see inefficiency
and conceptualize new solutions, and enjoy developing long-range plans to accomplish
their vision. They excel at logical reasoning and are usually articulate and quick-witted.
ENTJs are analytical and objective, and like bringing order to the world around them. When
there are flaws in a system, the ENTJ sees them, and enjoys the process of discovering and
implementing a better way. ENTJs are assertive and enjoy taking charge; they see their
role as that of leader and manager, organizing people and processes to achieve their
goals.
ENFP - THE CHAMPION
ENFPs are people-centred creators with a focus on possibilities and a contagious enthusiasm
for new ideas, people and activities. Energetic, warm, and passionate, ENFPs love to help
other people explore their creative potential.
ENFPs are typically agile and expressive communicators, using their wit, humour, and
mastery of language to create engaging stories. Imaginative and original, ENFPs often
have a strong artistic side. They are drawn to art because of its ability to express inventive
ideas and create a deeper understanding of human experience.
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ENTP- THE VISIONARY
ENTPs are inspired innovators, motivated to find new solutions to intellectually challenging
problems. They are curious and clever, and seek to comprehend the people, systems, and
principles that surround them. Open-minded and unconventional, Visionaries want to
analyse, understand, and influence other people.
ENTPs enjoy playing with ideas and especially like to banter with others. They use their
quick wit and command of language to keep the upper hand with other people, often
cheerfully poking fun at their habits and eccentricities. While the ENTP enjoys challenging
others, in the end they are usually happy to live and let live. They are rarely judgmental,
but they may have little patience for people who can’t keep up.
INFJ - THE COUNSELLOR
INFJs are creative nurturers with a strong sense of personal integrity and a drive to help
others realize their potential. Creative and dedicated, they have a talent for helping others
with original solutions to their personal challenges.
The Counsellor has a unique ability to intuit others’ emotions and motivations, and will
often know how someone else is feeling before that person knows it himself. They trust
their insights about others and have strong faith in their ability to read people. Although
they are sensitive, they are also reserved; the INFJ is a private sort, and is selective about
sharing intimate thoughts and feelings.
INTJ - THE MASTERMIND
INTJs are analytical problem-solvers, eager to improve systems and processes with their
innovative ideas. They have a talent for seeing possibilities for improvement, whether at
work, at home, or in themselves.
Often intellectual, INTJs enjoy logical reasoning and complex problem-solving. They
approach life by analysing the theory behind what they see, and are typically focused
inward, on their own thoughtful study of the world around them. INTJs are drawn to logical
systems and are much less comfortable with the unpredictable nature of other people and
their emotions. They are typically independent and selective about their relationships,
preferring to associate with people who they find intellectually stimulating.
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INFP - THE HEALER
INFPs are imaginative idealists, guided by their own core values and beliefs. To a Healer,
possibilities are paramount; the realism of the moment is only of passing concern. They
see potential for a better future, and pursue truth and meaning with their own individual
flair.
INFPs are sensitive, caring, and compassionate, and are deeply concerned with the
personal growth of themselves and others. Individualistic and non-judgmental, INFPs
believe that each person must find their own path. They enjoy spending time exploring
their own ideas and values, and are gently encouraging to others to do the same. INFPs
are creative and often artistic; they enjoy finding new outlets for self-expression.
INTP - THE ARCHITECT
INTPs are philosophical innovators, fascinated by logical analysis, systems, and design.
They are preoccupied with theory, and search for the universal law behind everything they
see. They want to understand the unifying themes of life, in all their complexity.
INTPs are detached, analytical observers who can seem oblivious to the world around
them because they are so deeply absorbed in thought. They spend much of their time
focused internally: exploring concepts, making connections, and seeking understanding.
To the Architect, life is an ongoing inquiry into the mysteries of the universe.
ESFJ - THE PROVIDER
ESFJs are conscientious helpers, sensitive to the needs of others and energetically dedicated
to their responsibilities. They are highly attuned to their emotional environment and
attentive to both the feelings of others and the perception others have of them. ESFJs like
a sense of harmony and cooperation around them, and are eager to please and provide.
ESFJs value loyalty and tradition, and usually make their family and friends their top
priority. They are generous with their time, effort, and emotions. They often take on the
concerns of others as if they were their own, and will attempt to put their significant
organizational talents to use to bring order to other people’s lives.
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ESTJ- THE SUPERVISOR
ESTJs are hardworking traditionalists, eager to take charge in organizing projects and
people. Orderly, rule-abiding, and conscientious, ESTJs like to get things done, and tend
to go about projects in a systematic, methodical way.
ESTJs are the consummate organizers, and want to bring structure to their surroundings.
They value predictability and prefer things to proceed in a logical order. When they see a
lack of organization, the ESTJ often takes the initiative to establish processes and guidelines,
so that everyone knows what’s expected.
ESFP - THE PERFORMER
ESFPs are vivacious entertainers who charm and engage those around them. They are
spontaneous, energetic, and fun-loving, and take pleasure in the things around them:
food, clothes, nature, animals, and especially people.
ESFPs are typically warm and talkative and have a contagious enthusiasm for life. They
like to be in the middle of the action and the centre of attention. They have a playful, open
sense of humour, and like to draw out other people and help them have a good time.
ESTP - THE DYNAMO
ESTPs are energetic thrill seekers who are at their best when putting out fires, whether
literal or metaphorical. They bring a sense of dynamic energy to their interactions with
others and the world around them. They assess situations quickly and move adeptly to
respond to immediate problems with practical solutions.
Active and playful, ESTPs are often the life of the party and have a good sense of humour.
They use their keen powers of observation to assess their audience and adapt quickly
to keep interactions exciting. Although they typically appear very social, they are rarely
sensitive; the ESTP prefers to keep things fast-paced and silly rather than emotional or
serious.
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ISFJ - THE PROTECTOR
ISFJs are industrious caretakers, loyal to traditions and organizations. They are practical,
compassionate, and caring, and are motivated to provide for others and protect them
from the perils of life.
ISFJs are conventional and grounded, and enjoy contributing to established structures
of society. They are steady and committed workers with a deep sense of responsibility to
others. They focus on fulfilling their duties, particularly when they are taking care of the
needs of other people. They want others to know that they are reliable and can be trusted
to do what is expected of them. They are conscientious and methodical, and persist until
the job is done.
ISTJ - THE INSPECTOR
ISTJs are responsible organizers, driven to create and enforce order within systems and
institutions. They are neat and orderly, inside and out, and tend to have a procedure
for everything they do. Reliable and dutiful, ISTJs want to uphold tradition and follow
regulations.
ISTJs are steady, productive contributors. Although they are Introverted, ISTJs are rarely
isolated; typical ISTJs know just where they belong in life, and want to understand how
they can participate in established organizations and systems. They concern themselves
with maintaining the social order and making sure that standards are met.
ISFP - THE COMPOSER
ISFPs are gentle caretakers who live in the present moment and enjoy their surroundings
with cheerful, low-key enthusiasm. They are flexible and spontaneous, and like to go with
the flow to enjoy what life has to offer. ISFPs are quiet and unassuming, and may be hard
to get to know. However, to those who know them well, the ISFP is warm and friendly,
eager to share in life’s many experiences.
ISFPs have a strong aesthetic sense and seek out beauty in their surroundings. They are
attuned to sensory experience, and often have a natural talent for the arts. ISFPs especially
excel at manipulating objects, and may wield creative tools like paintbrushes and sculptor’s
knives with great mastery.
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ISTP - THE CRAFTSMAN
ISTPs are observant artisans with an understanding of mechanics and an interest in
troubleshooting. They approach their environments with a flexible logic, looking for
practical solutions to the problems at hand. They are independent and adaptable, and
typically interact with the world around them in a self-directed, spontaneous manner.
ISTPs are attentive to details and responsive to the demands of the world around them.
Because of their astute sense of their environment, they are good at moving quickly and
responding to emergencies. ISTPs are reserved, but not withdrawn: the ISTP enjoys taking
action, and approaches the world with a keen appreciation for the physical and sensory
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WHO YOU ARE | LEARNING STYLES QUESTIONNAIRE
This questionnaire is designed to find out your preferred learning style(s). Over the years
you have probably developed learning ‘habits’ that help you benefit more from some
experiences than from others. Since you are probably unaware of this, this questionnaire
will help you pinpoint your learning preferences so that you are in a better position to
select learning experiences that suit your style. and having a greater understanding of
those that suit the style of others.
This is an internationally proven tool designed by
Peter Honey and Alan Mumford.
There is no time limit to this questionnaire. It will
probably take you 10-15 minutes. The accuracy of
the results depends on how honest you can be.
There are no right or wrong answers.
If you agree more than you disagree
with a statement put a tick by it.
If you disagree more than you agree
put a cross by it.
Be sure to mark each item with
either a tick or cross.
1. I have strong beliefs about what is right and wrong, good and bad
2. I often act without considering the possible consequences
3. I tend to solve problems using a step-by-step approach
4. I believe that formal procedures and policies restrict people
5. I have a reputation for saying what I think, simply and directly
6. I often find that actions based on feelings are as sound as those based on careful thought and analysis
7. I like the sort of work where I have time for thorough preparation and implementation
8. I regularly question people about their basic assumptions
9. What matters most is whether something works in practice
10. I actively seek out new experiences
11. When I hear about a new idea or approach I immediately start working out how to apply it in practice
12. I am keen on self discipline such as watching my diet, taking regular exercise, sticking to a fixed routine, etc.
13. I take pride in doing a thorough job
14. I get on best with logical, analytical people and less well with spontaneous, “irrational”
15. I take care over the interpretation of data available to me and avoid jumping to conclusions
23

16. I like to reach a decision carefully after weighing up many alternatives
17. I’m attracted more to novel, unusual ideas than to practical ones
18. I don’t like disorganised things and prefer to fit things into a coherent pattern
19. I accept and stick to laid down procedures and policies so long as I regard them as an efficient way of
getting the job done
20. I like to relate my actions to a general principle
21. In discussions I like to get straight to the point
22. 1 tend to have distant, rather formal relationships with people at work
23. I thrive on the challenge of tackling something new and different
24. I enjoy fun-loving, spontaneous people
25. I pay meticulous attention to detail before coming to a conclusion
26. I find it difficult to produce ideas on impulse
27. I believe in coming to the point immediately
28. I am careful not to jump to conclusions too quickly
29. I prefer to have as many resources of information as possible - the more data to think over the better
30. Flippant people who don’t take things seriously enough usually irritate me
31. I listen to other people’s points of view before putting my own forward
32. I tend to be open about how I’m feeling
33. In discussions I enjoy watching the manoeuvrings of the other participants
34. I prefer to respond to events on a spontaneous, flexible basis rather than plan things out in advance
35. I tend to be attracted to techniques such as network analysis, flow charts, branching programs,
contingency planning, etc.
36. It worries me if I have to rush out a piece of work to meet a tight deadline
37. I tend to judge people’s ideas on their practical merits
38. Quiet, thoughtful people tend to make me feel uneasy
39. I often get irritated by people who want to rush things
40. It is more important to enjoy the present moment than to think about the past or future
41. I think that decisions based on a thorough analysis of all the
information are sounder than those based on intuition
42. I tend to be a perfectionist
43. In discussions I usually produce lots of spontaneous ideas
44. In meetings I put forward practical realistic ideas
45. More often than not, rules are there to be broken
46. I prefer to stand back from a situation
If you agree more than you disagree
with a statement put a tick by it.
If you disagree more than you agree
put a cross by it.
Be sure to mark each item with
either a tick or cross.
47. I can often see inconsistencies and weaknesses in
other people’s arguments
48. On balance I talk more than I listen
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49. I can often see better, more practical ways to get things done
50. I think written reports should be short and to the point
51. I believe that rational, logical thinking should win the day
52. I tend to discuss specific things with people rather than engaging in social discussion
53. I like people who approach things realistically rather than theoretically
54. In discussions I get impatient with irrelevancies and digressions
55. If I have a report to write I tend to produce lots of drafts before settling on the final version
56. I am keen to try things out to see if they work in practice
57. I am keen to reach answers via a logical approach
58. I enjoy being the one that talks a lot
59. In discussions I often find I am the realist, keeping people to the point and avoiding wild speculations
60. I like to ponder many alternatives before making up my mind
61. In discussions with people I often find I am the most dispassionate and objective
62. In discussions I’m more likely to adopt a “low profile” than to take the lead and do most of the talking
63. I like to be able to relate current actions to a longer term bigger picture
64. When things go wrong I am happy to shrug it off and “put it down to experience”
65. I tend to reject wild, spontaneous ideas as being impractical
66. It’s best to think carefully before taking action
67. On balance I do the listening rather than the talking
68. I tend to be tough on people who find it difficult to adopt a logical approach
69. Most times I believe the end justifies the means
70. I don’t mind hurting people’s feelings so long as the job gets done
71. I find the formality of having specific objectives and plans stifling
72. I’m usually one of the people who puts life into a party
73. I do whatever is expedient to get the job done
74. I quickly get bored with methodical, detailed work
75. I am keen on exploring the basic assumptions, principles and
theories underpinning things and events
76. I’m always interested to find out what people think
77. I like meetings to be run on methodical lines, sticking to
laid down agenda, etc.
78. I steer clear of subjective or ambiguous topics
79. I enjoy the drama and excitement of a crisis situation
80. People often find me insensitive to their feelings
If you agree more than you disagree
with a statement put a tick by it.
If you disagree more than you agree
put a cross by it.
Be sure to mark each item with
either a tick or cross.
25

LEARNING STYLES QUESTIONNAIRE | SCORING
The questionnaire is scored by awarding one point for each ticked item. There are no
points for crossed items. Simply indicate on the lists below which items were ticked
by circling the appropriate question number. Then total the amount of circles in each
column and add this number to the bottom of the column. The higher the number the
more you prefer this particular learning style.
2
7
1
5
4
13
3
9
6
15
8
11
10
16
12
19
17
25
14
21
23
28
18
27
24
29
20
35
32
31
22
37
34
33
26
44
38
36
30
49
40
39
42
50
43
41
47
53
45
46
51
54
48
52
57
56
58
55
61
59
64
60
63
65
71
62
68
69
72
66
75
70
74
67
77
73
79
76
78
80
TOTALS
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ACTIVIST REFLECTOR
THEORIST PRAGMATIST

LEARNING STYLES QUESTIONNAIRE | GENERAL DESCRIPTIONS
ACTIVISTS
Activists involve themselves fully and without bias in new experiences. They enjoy the here and
now and are happy to be dominated by immediate experiences. They are open-minded, not
sceptical, and this tends to make them enthusiastic about anything new. Their philosophy is:
“I’ll try anything once”. They tend to act first and consider the consequences afterwards. Their
days are filled with activity. They tackle problems by brainstorming. As soon as the excitement
from one activity has died down they are busy looking for the next. They tend to thrive on the
challenge of new experiences but are bored with implementation and longer-term consolidation.
They are gregarious people constantly involving themselves with others but in doing so; they
seek to centre all activities on themselves.
REFLECTORS
Reflectors like to stand back to ponder experiences and observe them from many different
perspectives. They collect data, both first hand and from others, and prefer to think about it
thoroughly before coming to any conclusion. The thorough collection and analysis of data
about experiences and events is what counts so they tend to postpone reaching definitive
conclusions for as long as possible. Their philosophy is to be cautious. They are thoughtful
people who like to consider all possible angles and implications before making a move. They
prefer to take a back seat in meetings and discussions. They enjoy observing other people in
action. They listen to others and get the drift of the discussion before making their own points.
They tend to adopt a low profile and have a slightly distant, tolerant unruffled air about them.
When they act it is part of a wide picture which includes the past as well as the present and
others’ observations as well as their own.
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THEORISTS
Theorists adapt and integrate observations into complex but logically sound theories. They think
problems through in a vertical, step-by-step logical way. They assimilate disparate facts into
coherent theories. They tend to be perfectionists who won’t rest easy until things are tidy and fit
into a rational scheme. They like to analyse and synthesise. They are keen on basic assumptions,
principles, theories models and systems thinking. Their philosophy prizes rationality and logic.
“If it’s logical it’s good”. Questions they frequently ask are: “Does it make sense?” “How does
this fit with that?” “What are the basic assumptions?” They tend to be detached, analytical and
dedicated to rational objectivity rather than anything subjective or ambiguous. Their approach
to problems is consistently logical. This is their “mental set” and they rigidly reject anything
that doesn’t fit with it. They prefer to maximise certainty and feel uncomfortable with subjective
judgments, lateral thinking and anything flippant.
PRAGMATISTS
Pragmatists are keen on trying out ideas, theories and techniques to see if they work in
practice. They positively search out new ideas and take the first opportunity to experiment
with applications. They are the sorts of people who return from management courses
brimming with new ideas that they want to try out in practice. They like to get on with things
and act quickly and confidently on ideas that attract them. They tend to be impatient with
ruminating and open-ended discussions. They are essentially practical, down to earth pile who like
making practical decisions and solving problems. They respond to problems and opportunities
“as a challenge”. Their philosophy is: “There is always a better way” and “if it works it’s good”.
You can use your preferred style
to select learning activities you’re
likely to enjoy. Your enjoyment
and comfort level will greatly
support maximising your
learning experience.
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ACTIVISTS LEARN BEST FROM ACTIVITIES WHERE:
• There are new experiences/problems/
opportunities from which to learn
• They can engross themselves in short
“here and now” activities such as business
games, competitive teamwork tasks,
role-playing exercises
• There is excitement/drama/crisis and things
chop and change with a range of diverse
activities to tackle
• They have a lot of the limelight/high visibility,
i.e. they can “chair” meetings, lead
discussions, and give presentations
• They are allowed to generate ideas without
constraints of policy or structure or
feasibility
• They are thrown in at the deep end with
a task they think is difficult, i.e. when set a
challenge with inadequate resources and
adverse conditions
• They are involved with other people, i.e.
bouncing ideas off them, solving problems
as part of a team
• It is appropriate to “have a go”
SUMMARY OF STRENGTHS:
ACTIVISTS LEARN LEAST FROM, AND MAY REACT
AGAINST, ACTIVITIES WHERE:
• Learning involves a passive role, i.e. listening
to lectures, monologues, explanations,
statements of how things should be done,
reading, watching
• They are asked to stand back and not be
involved
• They are required to assimilate, analyse and
interpret lots of “messy” data
• They are required to engage in solitary work,
i.e. reading, writing, thinking on their own
• They are asked to assess beforehand what
they will learn, and to appraise afterwards
what they have learned
• They are offered statements they see as
“theoretical”, i.e. explanation of cause or
background
• They are asked to repeat essentially the
same activity over and over again, i.e. when
practicing
• They have precise instructions to follow with
little room for manoeuvre
• They are asked to do a thorough job, i.e.
attend to detail, tie up loose ends, dot the
i’s, cross t’s
• Flexible and open minded
• Happy to have a go
• Happy to be exposed to new situations
• Optimistic about anything new and
therefore unlikely to resist change
SUMMARY OF WEAKNESSES:
• Tendency to take the immediately obvious
action without thinking
• Often take unnecessary risks
• Tendency to do too much themselves and
hog the limelight
• Rush into action without sufficient
preparation
• Get bored with implementation/
consolidation
KEY QUESTIONS FOR ACTIVISTS:
• Shall I learn something new, i.e. that I didn’t
know/couldn’t do before?
• Will there be a wide variety of different
activities? (I don’t want to sit and listen for
more than an hour at a stretch!)
• Will it be OK to have a go/let my hair down/
make mistakes/have fun?
• Shall 1 encounter some tough problems and
challenges?
• Will there be other like-minded people to mix
with?
29

REFLECTORS LEARN BEST FROM ACTIVITIES WHERE:
• They are allowed or encouraged to watch/
think/chew over activities
• They are able to stand back From events
and listen/observe, i.e. observing a group at
work, taking a back seat in a meeting,
watching a film or video
• They are allowed to think before acting, to
assimilate before commencing, i.e. time to
prepare, a chance to read in advance a
brief giving background data
• They can carry out some painstaking
research, i.e. investigate, assemble
information, and probe to get to
the bottom of things
• They have the opportunity to review what
has happened, what they have learned
• They are asked to produce carefully
considered analyses and reports
• They are helped to exchange views with
other people without danger, i.e. by prior
agreement, within a structured learning
experience
• They can reach a decision in their own time
without pressure and tight deadlines
SUMMARY OF STRENGTHS:
REFLECTORS LEARN LEAST FROM, AND MAY REACT
AGAINST, ACTIVITIES WHERE:
• They are “forced” into the limelight, i.e. to act
as leader/chairman, to role-play in front of
on-lookers
• They are involved in situations which require
action without planning
• They are pitched into doing something without
warning, i.e. to produce an instant
reaction, to produce an off-the-top-of-the-head
idea
• They are given insufficient data on which to
base a conclusion
• They are given cut and dried instructions of
how things should be done
• They are worried by time pressures or rushed
from one activity to another
• In the interests of expediency they have to make
short cuts or do a superficial job
SUMMARY OF WEAKNESSES:
• Tendency to hold back from direct participation
• Slow to make up their minds and reach a
decision
• Tendency to be too cautious and not take
enough risks
• Not assertive - they aren’t particularly
forthcoming and have no “small talk”
• Careful
• Thorough and methodical
• Thoughtful
• Good at listening to others and assimilating
information
• Rarely jump to conclusions
KEY QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTORS:
• Shall I be given adequate time to consider,
assimilate and prepare?
• Will there be opportunities/facilities to assemble
relevant information?
• Will there be opportunities to listen to other
people’s points of view - preferably a wide
cross section of people with a variety of views?
• Shall I be under pressure to be slapdash or to
extemporise?
30

THEORISTS LEARN BEST FROM ACTIVITIES WHERE:
• What is being offered is part of a system,
model, concept, theory
• The have time to explore methodically the
associations and inter-relationships between
ideas, events and situations
• They have the chance to question and probe
the basic methodology, assumptions or
logic behind something, i.e. by taking part in
a question and answer session, by checking a
paper for inconsistencies
• They are intellectually stretched, i.e. by
analysing a complex situation, being tested in
a tutorial session, by teaching high calibre
people who ask searching questions
• They are in structured situations with a clear
purpose
• They can listen to or read about ideas and
concepts that emphasise rationality or logic
and are well argued/elegant/watertight
• They can analyse and then generalise the
reasons for success or failure
• They are offered interesting ideas and concepts
even though they are not immediately
relevant
• They are required to understand and
participate in complex situations
SUMMARY OF STRENGTHS:
THEORISTS LEARN LEAST FROM, AND MAY REACT
AGAINST, ACTIVITIES WHERE:
• They are pitch-forked into doing something
without a context or apparent purpose
• They have to participate in situations
emphasising emotions and feelings
• They are involved in unstructured activities
where ambiguity and uncertainty are high,
i.e. with open-ended problems, on sensitivity
training
• They are asked to act or decide without a basis
in policy, principle or concept
• They are faced with a hotchpotch of alternative/
contradictory techniques/methods without
exploring any in depth, i.e. as on a “once over
lightly” course
• They find the subject matter platitudinous,
shallow or gimmicky
• They feel themselves out of tune with other
participants, i.e. when with lots of Activists or
people of lower intellectual calibre
SUMMARY OF WEAKNESSES:
• Restricted in lateral thinking
• low tolerance for uncertainty, disorder and
ambiguity
• Intolerant of anything subjective or intuitive
• Full of “shoulds, oughts and musts”
• Careful
• Thorough and methodical
• Thoughtful
• Good at listening to others and assimilating
information
• Rarely jump to conclusions
KEY QUESTIONS FOR THEORISTS:
• Will there be lots of opportunities to question?
• Do the objectives and program of events
indicate a clear structure and purpose?
• Shall I encounter complex ideas and concepts
that are likely to stretch me?
• Are the approaches to be used and concepts
to be explored “respectable”, i.e. sound
and valid?
• Shall I be with people of similar calibre to
myself?
31

PRAGMATIST LEARN BEST FROM ACTIVITIES
WHERE:
• There is an obvious link between the subject
matter and a problem or opportunity on
the job
• They are shown techniques for doing things
with obvious practical advantages, i.e.
how to save time, how to make a good first
impression, how to deal with awkward
people
• They have the chance to try out and practice
techniques with coaching/feedback
from a credible expert, i.e. someone who is
successful and can do the techniques
themselves
• They are exposed to a model they can emulate,
i.e. a respected boss, a demonstration
from someone with a proven track record, lots
of examples/anecdotes, and a film showing
how it’s done
• They are given techniques currently applicable
to their own job
• They are given immediate opportunities to
implement what they have learned
• There is a high face validity in the learning
activity, i.e. a good simulation, ‘real”
problems
• They can concentrate on practical issues, i.e.
drawing up action plans with an obvious
end product, suggesting short cuts, giving tips
PRAGMATISTS LEARN LEAST FROM, AND MAY
REACT AGAINST, ACTIVITIES WHERE:
• The learning is not related to an immediate
need they recognise/they cannot see, an
immediate relevance/practical benefit
• Organisers of the learning, or the event itself,
seems distant from reality, i.e. “ivory
towered”, all theory and general principles,
pure “chalk and talk”
• There is no practice or clear guidelines on how
to do it
• They feel that people are going round in circles
and not getting anywhere fast enough
• There are political, managerial or personal
obstacles to implementation
• There is no apparent reward from the learning
activity, i.e. more sales, shorter
meetings, higher bonus, promotion
SUMMARY OF WEAKNESSES:
• Tendency to reject anything without an obvious
application
• Not very interested in theory or basic principles
• Tendency to seize on the first expedient solution
to a problem
• Impatient with waffle
• On balance, task oriented not people oriented
SUMMARY OF STRENGTHS:
KEY QUESTIONS FOR PRAGMATISTS:
• Keen to test things out in practice
• Practical, down to earth, realistic
• Businesslike - gets straight to the point
• Technique oriented
• Will there be ample opportunities to practice
and experiment?
• Will there be lots of practical tips and
techniques?
• Shall we be addressing real problems and will
it result in action plans to tackle some of
my current problems?
• Shall we be exposed to experts who know how
to/can do it themselves?
32

WHO YOU ARE | REPRESENTATIONAL SYSTEMS
A note from your coach…
We all interpret the World in our own unique way but the majority, if not all, of us
‘language’ the World in one of four ways. This is known as our Representational System,
and we think and act more easily within our preferred system. This will lead us in the
language we use, how we communicate, how we experience the World around us, and
how we experience and share our emotions. Our representational system can also lead
us into preferred activities and careers.
When I work with couples who are expressing a breakdown in communication, I often
identify that both parties are simply using different representational systems, which their
partner is having trouble in understanding.
Knowing your Representational System is another key step towards gaining a greater
understanding of who you are and how you can use this new self-awareness to
bring around the changes and achievements you desire and deserve. Develop your
weaknesses and play to your strengths.
Over the following pages, you will find a set of 10 statements each with 4 phrases
underneath. Read through each statement and phrase carefully before ranking each
phrase from 1-4 based on the scoring system.
Each phrase must have a number 1, 2, 3 or 4
ranked beside it and no number can be used
twice within any one statement. If you have
trouble allocating a number to any of the
phrases, try and use the first thought that came
into your mind after reading each of the options.
Scoring System
1. Least descriptive of you
2. Second least descriptive of you
3. Second best description of you
4. Best description of you
33

1. When on holiday at the beach, the first thing that makes me glad to be there is:
The feel of the cool sand, the warm sun or the fresh breeze on my face
The roar of the waves, the whistling wind or the sound of birds in the distance
This is the type of vacation that makes sense or the cost is reasonable
The scenery, the bright sun, and the blue water
2. During an argument, I am most likely to be influenced by:
The other person’s tone of voice
Whether or not I can see the other person’s point of view
The logic of the other person’s argument
Whether or not I am in touch with the other person’s true feelings
3. It is easiest for me:
To find the ideal volume and tuning on the stereo system
Select the most intellectually relevant point in an interesting subject
Select the most comfortable furniture
Select rich, attractive and imaginative colour combinations
Scoring System
1. Least descriptive of you
2. Second least descriptive of you
3. Second best description of you
4. Best description of you
34

4. When I’m given a task at work, it is easier for me to carry this out when:
I can picture what is being required of me
I have a true feeling of what is being required of me
I have a clear understanding of what actions I need to undertake
I have tuned into what is being required of me
5. I make important decisions based on:
My gut feeling
Whatever argument sounds best
What looks best to me
A precise review and study of all the facts and issues
6. I find it easier to follow a presentation or lecture if:
I feel in touch with the presenter and the material is within my grasp
There is a visual element to the presentation
The presentation contains key facts and figures and is presented logically
The presenter speaks clearly, with varying tone and uses sound to emphasise key points
35

7. When purchasing a new car, I base my decision on:
The price, value, fuel consumption and safety features of the car
How comfortable the seats are and / or the feeling I get when I take it for a test drive
The colour and styling and / or how I look in it
The sound of the engine, stereo system and / or how quiet it rides
8. I assess how well I am doing at work based on:
My understanding of what needs to be done
How I see myself making progress
How things sound
How satisfied I feel
9. When meeting someone for the first time, I often judge them by:
The way they dress and look
The feeling I get from them
The words they choose
The tone of voice they use
10. When I agree with someone, I am more likely to say:
That feels right to me
The looks right to me
Scoring System
1. Least descriptive of you
2. Second least descriptive of you
3. Second best description of you
4. Best description of you
That sounds right to me
That makes perfect sense to me
36

Having completed the statements, transfer the numbers you assigned to each phrase, for
each of the 10 statements, into the spaces indicated below. It is important that you write
the numbers down in the sequence that they appear within each statement. At this stage
please disregard the letters indicated below.
STATEMENT 1
STATEMENT 2
STATEMENT 3
STATEMENT 4
STATEMENT 5
K
A
A
V
K
A
V
Ad
K
A
Ad
Ad
K
Ad
V
V
K
V
A
Ad
STATEMENT 6
STATEMENT 7
STATEMENT 8
STATEMENT 9
STATEMENT 10
K
Ad
Ad
V
K
V
K
V
K
V
Ad
V
A
Ad
A
A
A
K
A
Ad
Using the boxes provided below, place the corresponding number associated with each
letter above into the corresponding column below for each statement.
i.e. if statement 1 above reads 4-K / 2-A / 1-Ad and 3-V then write “4” in the “K”
Column for statement 1, “2” in the “A” column and so on. Then total up the columns
and discover your representational system.
STATEMENT
V
A
K
Ad
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
TOTALS
VISUAL
AUDITORY
KINAESTHETIC
AUDITORY DIGITAL
37

VISUAL AUDITORY KINAESTHETIC
AUDITORY
DIGITAL
Memorise by seeing
pictures and are less
distracted by noise. Often
have trouble remembering
and are bored by long
verbal instructions because
their mind may wander.
They are interested by how
the program looks.
Typically are easily
distracted by noise. They
can repeat things back to
you easily and learn by
listening. They like music
and like to talk on the
phone. Tone of voice and
the words used can be
important.
Often they talk slowly and
breathy. They respond
to physical rewards and
touching. They memorise by
doing or walking through
something. They will be
interested in a program that
feels right or gives them a
gut feeling.
They spend a fair
amount of time talking to
themselves. They memorise
by steps, procedures, and
sequences. They will want
to know the program
makes sense. They can
also sometimes exhibit
the characteristics of other
Representational systems.
VOCABULARY
SEE
LOOK
VIEW
APPEAR
SHOW
DAWN
REVEAL
PICTURE
ILLUMINATE
IMAGINE
CLEAR
FOGGY
FOCUSED
HAZY
CRYSTAL
HEAR
LISTEN
SOUND(S)
MAKE MUSIC
HARMONISE
TUNE IN/OUT
BE ALL EARS
RINGS A BELL
SILENCE
BE HEARD
RESONATE
DEAF
MELLIFLUOUS
DISSONANCE
QUESTION
FEEL
TOUCH
GRASP
GET HOLD OF
SLIP THROUGH
CATCH ON
TAP INTO
MAKE
THROW OUT
TURN AROUND
HARD
UNFEELING
CONCRETE
SOLID
GET A HANDLE
SENSE
EXPERIENCE
UNDERSTAND
THINK
LEARN
PROCESS
DECIDE
MOTIVATE
CONSIDER
CHANGE
PERCEIVE
INSENSITIVE
DISTINCT
CONCEIVE
KNOW
SPEECH PATTERNS
• Quickly grouped words
• Lots of interruptions with “um” or “ah”
• Deliberate phrasing
• Long complicated sentences
PROCESSING PATTERNS
• Quickly with a minimum of detail
• Will let you know unconsciously when they understand
by changing the subject
• Extensive detail
• Will not give indication of understanding unless you ask
TONE OF VOICE
• Slightly fast or excited
• Thoughtful, considerate, just above monotone
TRAITS
• Organised
• Gestures high and quick
• Fast talkers
• Picture descriptions
• Medium to fast talkers
• Like music
• Like phone
• Translate conversations
to sound
• Low and smooth
gestures
• Physical people
• Walk through before
doing
• Check own feelings
before expressing
thoughts
• Dissociated from
feelings
• Talk to themselves
regularly
• Exhibit other
representational
system traits
38

WHO YOU ARE | OPINIONS THAT MATTER
A note from your coach…
Many of my clients express the challenges they face daily by considering the opinions of
others. Whether it’s a work colleague, a friend or a stranger passing you in the street;
we often hear that little voice in our head asking us what we think that person thinks.
Here’s a quick and easy activity you can complete and once you commit to it you can
free yourself from the impact of the imagined, or explicit thoughts of others.
Cut out the piece of paper below. Then, simply write on it the names of people whose
opinions truly matter to you. Pop the piece of paper in your purse or wallet and
whenever you let the opinion of another person negatively impact you then simply take
out this list, and if their name isn’t on it, let it go!
39

40
Where
YOU WANT
TO BE

WHERE YOU WANT TO BE | YOUR FUTURE SELF
A note from your coach...
You’ve taken the opportunity to review your life as it currently is, as well as identifying
areas for development. You’ve gained a greater understanding of who you are and how
you can apply this self-awareness to increase your impact on achieving your future goals.
It’s important to finally take the opportunity to begin the process of planning your future
self. I urge you to complete the following task completely outside of your comfort zone
and dream big.
Once you’ve completed the activity, begin the process of visualisation, thinking deeply
about who you are going to be and creating mental images, in as much detail as
possible, so your unconscious brain has a clear understanding of the direction your life
is heading. Many of my clients also benefit from creating visualisation boards; get the
magazines, scissors and glue at the ready!
DESIGNING YOUR FUTURE SELF
Utilise your the Wheel of Life template as a guide on which areas to design your life for.
Asking yourself:
• What do I want to achieve in this area of my life?
• What will my life look, sound, feel like in this area?
• How will I measure balance and success in this area?
Also included are the 6 Basic Human Needs; take an opportunity to consider how you
could improve these 6 areas of your life. Asking yourself:
• How will I meet this need?
• What will I do to live this area of my life more fully?
• How will I measure balance and success in this area?
Grab your favourite stationery and use the pages provided.
41

PHYSICAL ENVIRONMENT
• What do I want to achieve
in this area of my life?
• What will my life look,
sound, feel like in this area?
• How will I measure balance
and success in this area?
CAREER AND WORK
42

MONEY
• What do I want to achieve
in this area of my life?
• What will my life look,
sound, feel like in this area?
• How will I measure balance
and success in this area?
HEALTH
43

FAMILY AND FRIENDS
• What do I want to achieve
in this area of my life?
• What will my life look,
sound, feel like in this area?
• How will I measure balance
and success in this area?
RELATIONSHIP AND ROMANCE
44

PERSONAL GROWTH
• What do I want to achieve
in this area of my life?
• What will my life look,
sound, feel like in this area?
• How will I measure balance
and success in this area?
FUN AND RECREATION
45

• How will I meet this need?
• What will I do to live this
area of my life more fully?
• How will I measure balance
and success in this area?
CERTAINTY
UNCERTAINTY/ VARIETY
SIGNIFICANCE
46

• How will I meet this need?
• What will I do to live this
area of my life more fully?
• How will I measure balance
and success in this area?
CONNECTION/LOVE
GROWTH
CONTRIBUTION
47

WHERE YOU WANT TO BE | GOAL SETTING
You’ve designed your Future Self and have identified goals you want to set in order to
support you in becoming this fantastic person.
The following SMART Plan process is perfect for any and every change or achievement
you are planning to make. The important thing is to ensure you have a plan in place for
each and every goal.
“A goal without a plan is simply a dream, it takes a plan to
make a dream a reality.”
Setting goals is easy especially when you follow the simple process to Get SMART!
SPECIFIC MEASURABLE ATTAINABLE RELEVANT TIME BASED
48

SPECIFIC - What specifically is your goal?
MEASURABLE - How will you know when you’ve achieved your goal? How will you measure success?
49

ATTAINABLE - Is this goal attainable? If you don’t think so, what will stop you and how will you overcome this?
RELEVANT - Is this goal relevant to your long term plan e.g. Your Future Self?
TIME BASED - What exact date will you achieve this goal by?
50

FOCUS ON PRIORITIES
Make your priorities SMART! What do you want to change or learn?
What learning priorities give you the greatest potential results?
IMPLEMENT SOMETHING EVERY DAY
What situations, people, or events signal
that right now is the time to put new
behaviours into action?
Every time I see the following situation(s)…
What new behaviour will I try?
Where will I push my comfort zone?
…I will take the following action:
51

REFLECT ON WHAT I LEARN
What will I do each day to consider what worked, what didn’t work, and what I want to do next time?
SEEK FEEDBACK AND SUPPORT
How will I draw on other people to track my progress, gather advice and feedback, and support
my learning?
Seek feedback and information
Seek resources, support, and opportunities
TRANSFER LEARNING TO THE NEXT LEVEL
How will I evaluate my progress? Considering my goals and priorities, how will I update
my plan? How will I use what I learn?
52

What’s
HOLDING
YOU BACK

WHAT’S HOLDING YOU BACK |
LIMITING BELIEFS
A note from your coach...
At moments throughout our life, and for many almost on a daily basis, we
experience the feeling that we can’t achieve something we’re aiming to achieve.
Whether that be a long term goal we’re maintaining, a difficult conversation we
need to have but are putting off, or a piece of work that we need to start but keep
seeming to procrastinate. These examples and many others are all the result of
limiting beliefs.
A limiting belief is a belief we have about ourselves that holds us back from doing
something, the sad thing is, these beliefs are often, if not always, untrue.
Like a caged bird, we sit gazing through bars, at the outside world. Dreaming, what
if...
One day the cage door opens and the bird sits, anxious and absorbed by the
fear of what is on the outside, the unknown. Conscious of the cat that often sits
menacingly licking its lips at the foot of her cage. She feels comfortable in her cage;
it isn’t so bad here. Her needs are met; she’s fed, cleaned, and safe. Life outside the
cage provides some occasional distractions. She sits and seeks to answer ‘Why risk
venturing out?’
The following day the cage door opens and the bird is visited by another bird. Her
visitor sits on the windowsill and talks of her adventures. Her days spent soaring
through the skies, perching on the trees and her trips to the seaside for fish and
chips. She listens, fascinated by this bird’s life outside the cage, admiring her
braveness. She ponders on the thought that birds can live a life outside a
cage but she resolves that her visitor is in her rightful place and she is
in hers. She sits and seeks to answer ‘Why not venture out?’
On our final day the cage door opens, no friend visits and she sits,
not on her perch, but in the doorway of her cage, once again, she
dreams, what if…
She begins to list the reasons she can’t leave, and her imagination
drifts and creates horror stories of what could happen if she did
leave her cage. She continues to list the reasons a life outside the
cage is a life for other birds and not for her, and her imagination
drifts to create stories of how it’s easier for others, they have what
they need to be free. Finally, she lists the reasons she doesn’t
deserve a life outside a cage, or the chance to soar free, and
her imagination drifts to the lives of others who claim a life they
desire, and feel entitled to.
But as she lists, she dreams, what if…
54

To some extent we’re all caged birds, some of us have bigger cages,
some of us venture out more but many of us feel trapped by the
limiting beliefs we have about ourselves. Believing:
• It’s not possible
• I can’t do it
• I don’t deserve it
Limiting beliefs are those which constrain us in some way. Just by believing
them, we do not think, do or say the things that they inhibit. And in doing
so we impoverish our lives. We may have beliefs about rights, duties,
abilities, permissions and so on.
A life lived within limits is not a life lived fulfilled. Now, I know
society places limits on our behaviour and as we continue today’s
activity I make the hopeful assumption you’re the type of
person who wouldn’t want to murder, steal or commit any
other criminal act. Limiting beliefs are the internal thoughts
which inhibit what you’re willing to commit to or do.
Many of our limiting beliefs have been held for a long time and once
a limiting belief has been created we often construct our lives to avoid
breaching the belief. If we believe we’re not confident, we’ll avoid
activities that push us out of our comfort zone. If we believe we
can’t be happy, we will seek out opportunities to evidence that
our lives are bad. Here’s the key with a limiting belief, they
have power because we give them power and they increase
their control because we actively seek situations and make
decisions that create memories of our limiting belief
being correct. Almost like adding salt to the wound.
Like the bird in the cage, once bound
by the bars, now we’re breaking free.
55

56
Breaking
FREE

BREAKING FREE | IDENTIFYING YOUR LIMITING BELIEFS
Using the Wheel of Life I’d like for you to once again review your scores and for the
areas you scored lower than 10 ask yourself:
What has prevented me in the past from creating
satisfaction in this area of my life?
Write down your findings, particularly the ones for which you take personal responsibility.
Now, revisit your Action Plans and read through them afresh. Ask yourself...
What will stop me achieving this goal? What are the
barriers to my succ?
Once again, write down your findings, particularly the ones for which you take personal
responsibility.
Finally, take a moment to list everything about yourself that you think holds you back
from achieving balance and success in all areas of your life. Tune in to the voice in your
head that tells you no, you can’t, you won’t, it isn’t possible, that’s more for other people
than you and you don’t deserve it.
NOTES
57

BREAKING FREE | BELIEF BUSTING...
Let’s first remember limiting beliefs aren’t there to hurt you, the human brain is complex
and creates limiting beliefs in order to protect you from doing something the brain has
registered as you not wanting to do. That’s the reason limiting beliefs are usually formed
after a specific memory.
LIMITING BELIEFS USUALLY COME FROM ONE OF THREE AREAS:
POSSIBILITY
You don’t think
it’s possible
ABILITY
You don’t think you
have the ability to
do it
WORTHINESS
You don’t think
you deserve it
Review the limiting beliefs you listed in the last activity and categorise them each under
one of these three headings; possibility, ability, or worthiness. Remember, you might
have a whole host of images, memories and past decisions which evidence the limiting
belief but this is simply false-evidence and not the actual reason you can’t, are unable to
or don’t deserve to.
Now you have categorised your limiting beliefs, let’s move on and begin the process of
decreasing their power. You undo limiting beliefs by asking them questions and breaking
them down, gaining a greater understanding of why they exist and what purpose they
serve. Ask your categorised limiting beliefs the question specific to their category.
Following this activity, you should be feeling a little more in control of your limiting
beliefs and gaining options to overcome their impact on you achieving balance and
success in all areas of your life, including the goals you have begun to set through your
workbook.
A note from your coach...
There are many people, myself included, who practice the art of affirmation and I would
urge you to join me each day in exclaiming:
58

‘It’s possible,
I can do it,
I deserve it!’

POSSIBILITY
What would make it possible? What would I need to do to make it possible? Who else has
managed to do it and how?
ABILITY
What would I need to be able to do to do this? What knowledge, skill, quality or behaviour do I need?
How will I get it? What do I need to learn, the learning of which will free me to change and achieve?
WORTHINESS
Why don’t I deserve this? What might you need to let go of in order to move forward? Is the voice
in my head my voice or does it belong to someone else I know? If someone else, what reason are
they telling me I don’t deserve this?
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A little
SOMETHING
EXTRA
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A LITTLE SOMETHING EXTRA | THE ADVANTAGE SELF ASSESSMENT
A note from your coach...
The Advantage is the 7 Soft Skills you need to get ahead in your personal and
professional life. The 7 key skills are based on The Advantage written by Emma Sue
Prince and published by Pearson.
We live in times of unprecedented change and exciting opportunity. The tools and
technologies we use at work, technology itself, economic cuts, increased workload and
information overload, performance-based work and short-term contracts, as well as
juggling home life and relationships are making a huge impact. It’s a wonder we can
survive in such a harsh environment, never mind thrive. But thrive we can, and we are
in a unique position to do just that. Why? Because the skills and competences you need
right now are all interpersonal ones. Ones that will help you stay one step ahead in the
midst of change and uncertainty. Ones that you naturally have already and can develop
more.
This quick and easy assessment offers you an opportunity to identify your strengths and
weaknesses in Adaptability, Empathy, Integrity, Optimism, Being Proactive, Resilience,
and Critical Thinking.
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ADAPTABILITY
Change is all around us – respond better to opportunities by being
flexible and agile.
EMPATHY
Nurture your relationships by learning to actively listen and
understand others.
RESILIENCE
You will make mistakes, but it’s all about bouncing back, learning
from experience and moving on to the next challenge.
BEING PROACTIVE
Show you’re a self-starter – respond rather than react, and learn to
reinvent yourself.
CRITICAL THINKING
Keep an open mind – think smarter, more resourcefully, creatively
and collaboratively.
INTEGRITY
Trust, values, principles and honesty are even more important now
we have less time.
OPTIMISM
Leave disappointments behind – this is about keeping a positive
attitude no matter what life throws at you.
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Read each question and select a response based on how often you
evidence the skills described. You should select from either always,
occasionally or rarely.
RARELY
OCCASIONALLY
ALWAYS
Are you flexible when approaching a challenge?
Are you able to easily adapt to different situations?
Are you resourceful?
Can you think of creative solutions to challenges?
Do you grab new opportunities?
Are you open to new ideas?
Can you see situations from a variety of different angles?
Do you collaborate well with others?
Do you confidently challenge conventional ways of thinking?
Are you happy to experiment when problem solving?
Can you understand the emotions of others?
Do you use strong listening skills to really understand another person’s situation?
Do you respect other people’s opinions, even when they differ fer to yours?
Can you appreciate the emotions of others without having to feel their emotion too?
Do you support people in finding their own solution rather than giving immediate advice?
Are you on time for appointments/meetings?
Do you complete tasks within the agreed deadlines?
Do you do what you say you’re going to do when you say you’re going to do it?
Do you do your activities by a set of personal values?
Is your mood and behaviours outwardly consistent?
Are you able to remain positive in challenging situations?
Are you able to accept challenging feedback?
Are you the most positive person you know?
Do you look for the silver lining in the dark clouds?
Can you influence those around you to remain positive?
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RARELY
OCCASIONALLY
ALWAYS
Do you look and plan ahead in your life and career?
PROACTIVITY
Are you focused on taking action?
Do you remain motivated and avoid procrastination?
Are you confident to speak up when you think action being proposed is wrong?
Do you seek to discover potential problems to plans and overcome them in advance?
Are you able to actively and successfully manage your stress levels?
RESILLIENCE
Are you able to overcome setbacks and move quickly into action?
Do you work well under pressure?
Do you remain focused on achieving your goals, no matter what the situation?
Are you comfortable to say when you’re wrong?
SCORING
REVIEW YOUR ANSWERS IN EACH ADVANTAGE SKILL SECTION
• Where you scored a majority of Always responses, this is as an Advantage skill which
is a strength for you.
• Where you scored a majority of Occasionally responses, this
is an Advantage skill which you would benefit from developing.
• Where you scored a majority of Rarely responses, this is an
area for immediate development. Skills scoring a majority
of rarely responses should be those you focus on developing
first.
Chris Dudley is a Licensed Trainer
of The Advantage workshop. To
book yourself on the next workshop
head to chrisdudley.co.uk
• Where an Advantage skill has an even spread of
responses, you should focus on developing any specific
questions to which you responded either occasionally
or rarely, focussing first on the rarely responses.
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A LITTLE SOMETHING EXTRA | STRESS QUESTIONNAIRE
A note from your coach…
The word ‘stress’ is used to describe the physical and/or emotional response to the
demands and pressures that modern living means we come under from time to time.
Stress can be a positive thing, which drives us on and helps us to grow, develop and be
stimulated. However, when stress reaches a certain level, it can overcome a person’s
ability to cope and can impact on their physical and mental health.
It’s important to understand your current stress levels in order to build a strong
foundation for any future change and achievement. This quick and simple questionnaire
will give you an indication into how in control of your current stress levels you are.
Do you ever suffer from any of the following? Tick the appropriate option for each.
Where the symptom does not apply do not tick a box.
STATEMENT RARELY SOMETIMES OFTEN
IRRITABILITY
FEELING DEPRESSED
FEELING RESTLESS
TENSION
ANXIETY
LACK OF CONCENTRATION
FRUSTRATION
FEELING PANICKED/ATTACKS
FREQUENT CRYING
INCREASED SMOKING
INCREASED ALCOHOL CONSUMPTION
FINGER OR FOOT TAPPING
SCRATCHING SCALP OR HAIR TWIDDLING
LETHARGY/FATIGUE
ACCIDENT PRONE
INSOMNIA
HEADACHES
NAUSEA
CONSTIPATION/DIARRHOEA
SKIN PROBLEMS
HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE
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STATEMENT RARELY SOMETIMES OFTEN
EXCESSIVE SWEATING OR COLD SWEATS
RAPID OR IRREGULAR BREATHING
ALLERGIES OCCURRING MORE OFTEN
FREQUENT COLDS
PRE-MENSTRUAL TENSION
ABSENT FROM WORK
WORKING LONG HOURS
DREADING GOING TO WORK
BOREDOM
LACK OF COMMUNICATION
TAKING WORK HOME
OVER CONCERN WITH SILLY DETAILS
NAIL BITING
NEVER HAVING TIME FOR YOURSELF
ADD UP YOUR SCORE - TOTALS
Some physical symptoms may not be due to stress,
or you could be worried if you’ve realised that
you’re under a lot of stress, in which case see your
doctor.
Just remember that we all feel stressed from time
to time and registering some of these symptoms
is no cause for alarm but you should take action
to address your stress.
When you have lled in the
questionnaire, add up your scores!
Rarely - 1 oint
Somim - 2 oints
Often - 3 oints
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ADD UP YOUR SCORES
RARELY = 1 POINT / SOMETIMES = 2 POINTS / OFTEN = 3 POINTS
35-50
51-79
80-105
If you’re ready to get to work in
proactively identifying and
managing your stress email
chris@chrisdudley.co.uk and
request your stress buster
action pack.
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WITH THANKS
Basic Human Needs courtesy of the work of Anthony Robbins with meanings taken from
changingminds.org.
Personality Type Questionnaire based on the work of Isabel Briggs Myers, Katharine
Briggs, and the theories of psychologist Carl Jung. Personality Type overviews courtesy of
truity.com.
Learning Styles Questionnaire based on the work of Peter Honey and Alan Mumford.
Learning Styles overviews courtesy of www.hrdevelopment.co.nz.
Representational Systems content courtesy of NLP Practitioner Training by Inspire360
1987-2009 in association with Tad James & Advanced Neuro Dynamics.
FIRST Model courtesy of Successful Managers Handbook, PDI Ninth House, 2010.
Stress Management Questionnaire courtesy of www.bradford.ac.uk/counselling.
A big thank you to Rhian Tarling of Tarling Design for her creativity, hard-work, and
dedication in the design of this document and all my brand materials.
www.tarlingdesign.com
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WORKING WITH CHRIS
My focus is on getting you out of overwhelm and into control in the shortest possible
time, we achieve this in our first session. This clarity provides us the opportunity to define
what you want to achieve from our working together and to get you moving in the right
direction. We’ll review all aspects of your life and gain a greater understanding of what
is working for you, what you want to change and where you want to focus on making
new achievements.
Your bespoke coaching programme is as unique as you are, and will include a
combination of the following techniques:
• Coaching
• Mentoring
• Neuro-Linguistic Programming
• Time Line Therapy
• Hypnotherapy
• Training Workshops and Seminars
Further details of each technique can be found on my website chrisdudley.co.uk
Are you ready to be more tomorrow
than you are today?
ABOUT CHRIS
I have worked in personal development for over a decade and I am passionate
about supporting you to move out of overwhelm and in to control. Freeing you from
your past, your negative thoughts and your limiting beliefs. Together, we define your
future, inspiring you to the highest levels of self-believe, and I hold you accountable to
achieving your goals. I guide you, and provide you the learning, tools and techniques
you need to achieve balance and success in all areas of your life.
Whilst my success is best measured by my clients’ testimonials, I can to confirm I am a
Master Coach in Neuro-Linguistic Programming, and a Master Practitioner of Time Line
Therapy and Hypnotherapy. I hold qualifications in Learning and Development Practice
and Human Resource Development certified through the Chartered Institute of Personnel
and Development of which I am an Associate Member.
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TESTIMONIALS
Real People, Real Stories, Real Results
“The first and only thing in a whole year that got me putting one foot in front of the other
again was the Personal Discovery 90-minute session with Chris… After the session, I felt
like a weight had literally been lifted off my shoulders. My closest friend commented
that I was like a different person and for the first time in ages they saw a glimpse of a
happier, independent and motivated person… I wish I had done this years ago. From
being in a very dark place, where I couldn’t see a way forward, my future looks exciting
and positive to me now and I couldn’t have started this journey without Chris’ specialist,
professional and unique approach to coaching. “
DAWN
“Chris is such an easy person to talk to. Just like a chat with a friend, but filled with lots
of useful information to think about and apply in the future. I really feel Chris’ priorities
lie with helping and supporting as much as he possibly can.”
CAMERON
“The most important thing that enabled me to work with Chris was his non-judgemental
attitude. This enabled me to be honest about the situation I am in and how I am feeling
about things. Feeling safe to be honest without being judged has meant that we can
address the real problems I am facing, rather than the things I selectively choose to tell
him… Deciding to work with Chris has been a positive, life-changing decision for me,
which I have thoroughly enjoyed. Working with a ‘life coach’ wasn’t a decision I ever
thought I would make. I trusted my instincts and went for it – and I’m very glad I did.
Working with Chris has enabled me to move forward with my life, leaving behind the
things that weren’t working for me and gaining a new momentum to make the changes
to enable me to get what I want from life. I’m still me, but a much better, happier version
of me!”
CAROLINE
“The main benefit has been the brilliantly practical nature of the advice Chris has given
me. The focus was very much on coming up with strategies and solutions for the issues
I was facing. Chris was really positive about everything I was doing or aspiring to, and
simple though it sounds, that made an enormous difference to how I felt about things
(and myself) too. Chris is great. Really focused. Very conscientious and professional
but very warm and human too. I had apprehensions about life coaching but I would
recommend Chris wholeheartedly.”
JUDE
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chris@chrisdudley.co.uk
chrisdudley.co.uk
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