UR IT Magazine December 2015
UR M A G A Z I N E I TM DEC 2015 Now U can subscribe to UR IT! Ur dream comes true: THE BENEFITS OF SHOPPING Cleveland’s JAMI KINTON striving to be on top R U in Style for 2016? DRAWING THE LINE on co-dependency
- Page 2 and 3: CONTENTS Music is life. ...........
- Page 4: Music is the epitome of life experi
- Page 7 and 8: in the co-dependent repressing thei
- Page 9 and 10: ADVERTISE WITH UR IT Magazine can p
- Page 11 and 12: “SLEEP WHEN YOU’RE DEAD HAS ALW
- Page 13 and 14: 13
- Page 15 and 16: overemphasized. Two-toned overempha
- Page 17 and 18: 3. We buy new things to signify tra
- Page 19 and 20: UR world R thoughts I recently got
<strong>UR</strong><br />
M A G A Z I N E<br />
I<br />
TM<br />
DEC<br />
<strong>2015</strong><br />
Now U can<br />
subscribe to<br />
<strong>UR</strong> <strong>IT</strong>!<br />
Ur dream<br />
comes true:<br />
THE BENEF<strong>IT</strong>S<br />
OF SHOPPING<br />
Cleveland’s<br />
JAMI KINTON<br />
striving to be on top<br />
R U in Style<br />
for 2016?<br />
DRAWING THE LINE<br />
on co-dependency
CONTENTS<br />
Music is life. ..................................4<br />
The suffocating reality of co-dependency. ..... 6-7<br />
Striving to be on top. ...................... 10-11<br />
Up your fashion game for 2016. ............. 14-15<br />
Why shopping is good for you. .............. 16-17<br />
CRED<strong>IT</strong>S<br />
ARTICLES<br />
Jessica Martin 4<br />
Estefany Castillo 6-7<br />
Adeena Harbst 10-11<br />
Vivian Achieng 14-15<br />
Tiffanie Mora 16-17<br />
PHOTOGRAPHY<br />
J.Clark<br />
Shawna Lee<br />
Tiffanie Mora<br />
HAIR / MAKEUP<br />
Kristie & Tori<br />
ED<strong>IT</strong>ORS<br />
Adeena Harbst<br />
Stacy Clark<br />
DESIGN<br />
Taralyn Guenot<br />
Gazette Printers<br />
Tiffanie Mora<br />
GODDESSES OF THE WOODS...<br />
coming in January 2016
3
Music is the epitome of life<br />
experience. No matter<br />
what type of genre a person<br />
gravitates to, it’s safe to say that<br />
a song can capture a memory<br />
and make the memory feel<br />
fresh every time it plays. Music<br />
can inspire and motivate you<br />
throughout your day. It can help<br />
determine the mood you will be<br />
in or how you’ll handle a new<br />
situation. When we celebrate,<br />
mourn, dance, graduate or<br />
even create films, music is at<br />
every turn. When we can’t find<br />
the words to say, a song will say<br />
it perfectly.<br />
The power of lyrics and melody<br />
transcends and is one of the<br />
best gifts we can pass on. It can<br />
directly influence generations.<br />
Just look at the evolution of<br />
dance and entertainment from<br />
the time of our grandparents to<br />
now. Even so, the songs listed on<br />
the top ten lists from our past to<br />
our present can be appreciated<br />
and listened to whenever<br />
we so choose. Ah, thank you<br />
technology! We literally have<br />
access to thousands of songs<br />
at the touch of a button. It’s a<br />
beautiful thing.<br />
We should try to appreciate all<br />
types of music. Surely we can<br />
find at least one song in every<br />
genre that we’d enjoy listening<br />
to. Music is a life-long friend that<br />
forever changes lives. It needs<br />
to be lived, loved and shared. It<br />
can bring peace and happiness.<br />
In this life, what more can you<br />
ask for?<br />
I’ve listed the top 10 songs that<br />
hold a special place in my heart,<br />
to share them with all of you. (It’s<br />
actually 11 because I couldn’t<br />
choose just one by the wonderful<br />
Sinatra.) Enjoy! - Jessica M.<br />
MUSIC IS LIFE<br />
Bohemian Rhapsody- Queen<br />
The Chair- George Strait<br />
Barton Hollow- The Civil Wars<br />
Outta Control- Missy Elliot<br />
The Wedding Song- Kenny G<br />
Ink- Coldplay<br />
I Can See Clearly- Johnny Nash<br />
Human Nature- Michael Jackson<br />
More Than Words- Extreme<br />
The Best is Yet to Come/That ’s Life- Frank Sinatra<br />
4 MUSIC IS LIFE
THE SUFFOCATING REAL<strong>IT</strong>Y<br />
OF CO-DEPENDENCY<br />
It’s It’s the the feeling feeling of of never never being being<br />
enough enough for for one one person, that that special<br />
someone who who you you so so badly badly want want<br />
to to be be yours. yours. Without them, you you are are<br />
nothing. Without them, life life has has no no<br />
meaning. No No sense of of purpose.<br />
You’ll find find yourself making sacrifices<br />
for for your your partner, and and not not get get anything<br />
back. Ultimately, it’s it’s all all about them.<br />
Most often, co-dependent people<br />
have the the best of of intentions. They<br />
like like to to make people feel better,<br />
hate to to see see people suffer and have<br />
the the role role of of the the caretaker. They<br />
are are the the givers of of the the world. On<br />
the the other side of of the the relationship<br />
is is the the dependent person. This<br />
person will will usually have some<br />
sort sort of of addiction, abuse drugs<br />
or or alcohol. Together, this this couple<br />
forms a a co-dependency, where the the<br />
giver giver is is always taking care of of the the<br />
dependent person.<br />
KNOW THE SIGNS!<br />
HOW DO YOU KNOW IF IF YOU ARE A CO-DEPENDENT?<br />
Co-dependents are usually drained from taking care of everyone<br />
else. At At times they’ll feel they are not being authentic to themselves<br />
and have trouble communicating their feelings. They love to take<br />
care of of people, usually being warm and inviting, but the downside<br />
is is that they’ll attract needy, abusive people. Usually having low<br />
self-esteem, they’ll look for validation outside of themselves to feel<br />
worthy. They will find themselves being bored and empty when no<br />
issues arise in in their lives or or there are no people to help. They also will<br />
feel depressed when there is is lack of compliments or validation, and<br />
always think they’re not good enough. The most common thoughts<br />
of of a a co-dependent is is feeling victimized and angry when people<br />
don’t give back. Most will have a fear of rejection, abandonment, or<br />
not being loved. Finally, because they are taking care of everyone,<br />
they’ll lose their sense of of self and their own needs, making them<br />
feel like nothing.<br />
Co-dependency arises during childhood in dysfunctional families. Most<br />
often, a a family member will have an addiction to drugs or alcohol,<br />
or or be be abusive in in a sexual, physical, or emotional manner. Most of<br />
the the attention will go go to to taking care of this family member resulting<br />
6 6<br />
THE SUFFOCATING REAL<strong>IT</strong>Y OF CO-DEPENDENCY
in the co-dependent repressing<br />
their own emotions. They won’t<br />
confront, talk, or trust anyone.<br />
Dysfunctional families usually<br />
don’t know this is a problem.<br />
HOW DO YOU HEAL IF YOU<br />
ARE CO-DEPENDENT?<br />
The hardest aspect about being<br />
a co-dependent is saying “no”<br />
to someone, because of the<br />
constant need to help others<br />
and because that is how a codependent<br />
person finds their<br />
self-worth. A co-dependent must<br />
realize that they matter, too, and<br />
must learn how to be authentic<br />
to themselves with showing their<br />
true feelings, or take care of their<br />
own needs. They think they are<br />
not worthy of love, and that is<br />
why they will stay in abusive<br />
relationships, hence the quote,<br />
“We accept the love we think we<br />
deserve.” It’s a tough battle worth<br />
fighting, the co-dependent will<br />
learn they too are important, will<br />
meet needs and desires in their<br />
life, and ultimately start becoming<br />
their own person. In order to<br />
heal, a co-dependent must put<br />
up boundaries and have higher<br />
standards of how they want to<br />
be treated. They must also selfnurture<br />
and appreciate oneself,<br />
based on their appearance,<br />
values, morals, and beliefs.<br />
trigger our emotions. Being in tune with emotions is also a way to<br />
know what is right or wrong. Before saying “yes” to a friend who<br />
is asking for help, ask yourself if you are willing to help them or<br />
if there is anything lacking in your life that needs attention right<br />
now. Most important in your life is you! You are the master of<br />
your life, and deserving to have the best one. Use self-reflection<br />
to know when to leave an abusive relationship. Most of the time<br />
you will feel stuck and have no sense of freedom. A destructive<br />
relationship will leave you drained and empty, there is no room<br />
for growth. That is not fulfilling, and whatever you think it is, it’s<br />
certainly not love.<br />
Our journey to acceptance is a practice of<br />
self-love. Know that you are important,<br />
and never give up!<br />
It is possible that this is all<br />
inner work. Unmet needs during<br />
childhood affect how we see the<br />
world later in life. Our parents’<br />
problems can pass on to us<br />
unless we know when to stop<br />
the cycle. That is why it is so<br />
important to use self-reflection<br />
and know how certain situations<br />
THE SUFFOCATING REAL<strong>IT</strong>Y OF CO-DEPENDENCY<br />
7
8
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PHOTOGRAPHY<br />
VIDEO<br />
MODELING<br />
EVENTS<br />
MARKETING STRATEGIES<br />
814.201.6213<br />
uritmag.com
STRIVING TO BE ON TOP<br />
Model of of the Month<br />
Jami<br />
Growing up, up, Jami Kinton of of Ohio<br />
was was always fascinated by by models<br />
and and actors. Now, she she is is realizing<br />
her her dreams and and is is making her her own<br />
career as as a a celebrity.<br />
“I “I always looked at at entertainment as as<br />
this this sort sort of of untouchable career,” she she<br />
said. said. “I “I had had no no friends involved in in<br />
the the field field and and really didn’t know how<br />
to to get get started. My My parents both both had had<br />
stable, more more traditional jobs, and and<br />
they they didn’t didn’t know know quite quite what what to to think<br />
when when I said I said I I wanted to to model and and<br />
act.” act.”<br />
Jami Jami took took a a leap leap of of faith faith and and<br />
contacted a a talent talent agency when when she she<br />
was was 18 18 and and was was attending Ohio Ohio State State<br />
University, majoring majoring in in Journalism.<br />
Immediately upon upon her her graduation in in<br />
2006, 2006, Jami Jami worked worked as as a a reporter reporter<br />
for for the the Mansfield Mansfield News News Journal. Journal. She She<br />
was was there there until until 2013. 2013.<br />
“I “I was was incredibly incredibly fortunate fortunate to to have have<br />
editors<br />
editors<br />
who<br />
who<br />
still<br />
still<br />
allowed<br />
allowed<br />
me<br />
me<br />
to<br />
to<br />
follow<br />
follow<br />
my<br />
my<br />
initial<br />
initial<br />
dream,”<br />
dream,”<br />
she<br />
she<br />
recalls.<br />
recalls.<br />
So<br />
So<br />
she<br />
she<br />
stayed<br />
stayed<br />
on<br />
on<br />
track<br />
track<br />
and<br />
and<br />
pursued<br />
pursued<br />
opportunities<br />
opportunities<br />
to<br />
to<br />
do<br />
do<br />
what<br />
what<br />
she<br />
she<br />
was<br />
was<br />
truly<br />
truly<br />
passionate<br />
passionate<br />
about.<br />
about.<br />
In a time span of 13 years, Jami<br />
In a time span of 13 years, Jami<br />
has been featured in countless films,<br />
has been featured in countless films,<br />
print ads and commercials for major<br />
print ads and commercials for major<br />
companies like Fisher Price, Chevy,<br />
companies like Fisher Price, Chevy,<br />
Target and Wendy’s.<br />
Target and Wendy’s.<br />
Now at the age of 31, I look back and<br />
Now at the age of 31, I look back and<br />
think about how incredibly lucky I have<br />
think about how incredibly lucky I have<br />
been. And my career only seems to<br />
been. And my career only seems to<br />
be growing,” Jami shares.<br />
be growing,” Jami shares.<br />
Most recently, she has finished her<br />
Most<br />
fifth<br />
recently,<br />
season as<br />
she<br />
an<br />
has<br />
in-park<br />
finished<br />
host<br />
her<br />
for<br />
fifth season as an in-park host for<br />
the the Cleveland Cleveland Indians Indians and and just just picked picked<br />
up up ongoing ongoing work work as as an an actress actress for for a<br />
major major national national brand. brand. At At the the time time of of<br />
this<br />
this<br />
article,<br />
article,<br />
Jami<br />
Jami<br />
was<br />
was<br />
not<br />
not<br />
permitted<br />
permitted<br />
to<br />
to<br />
release<br />
release<br />
that<br />
that<br />
brand’s<br />
brand’s<br />
name<br />
name<br />
per<br />
per<br />
a<br />
a<br />
signed<br />
signed<br />
confidentiality<br />
confidentiality<br />
agreement.<br />
agreement.<br />
Jami<br />
Jami<br />
is<br />
is<br />
being<br />
being<br />
represented<br />
represented<br />
by<br />
by<br />
agencies<br />
agencies<br />
across the country, and is not only<br />
across the country, and is not only<br />
loving the work and fulfilling her<br />
loving the work and fulfilling her<br />
dreams, but is soaking up the endless<br />
dreams, but is soaking up the endless<br />
opportunities to travel.<br />
opportunities to travel.<br />
Besides ringing in work as an<br />
Besides ringing in work as an<br />
actress and model, Jami said she<br />
actress and model, Jami said she<br />
also works extensively on the other<br />
also works extensively on the other<br />
side of the camera in production.<br />
side of the camera in production.<br />
She has worked on several<br />
She has worked on several<br />
reality shows including “America’s<br />
reality shows including “America’s<br />
Got Talent,” “Dance Moms” and<br />
Got<br />
“The<br />
Talent,”<br />
Voice.”<br />
“Dance Moms” and<br />
“The Voice.”<br />
If If that that isn’t isn’t enough, in in September Jami<br />
officially officially started started her her own own company,<br />
Kinton Kinton Media Media Group, Group, through<br />
which<br />
which<br />
she<br />
she<br />
manages<br />
manages<br />
social<br />
social<br />
media<br />
media<br />
accounts<br />
accounts<br />
for<br />
for<br />
several<br />
several<br />
companies<br />
companies<br />
and<br />
and<br />
organizations.<br />
organizations.<br />
“I<br />
“I<br />
started<br />
started<br />
by<br />
by<br />
managing<br />
managing<br />
social<br />
social<br />
media<br />
media<br />
and public relations for the United<br />
and public relations for the United<br />
States Boomerang Team, and merely<br />
States Boomerang Team, and merely<br />
through word of mouth, suddenly I<br />
through word of mouth, suddenly found another career path,” she said.<br />
found another career path,” she said.<br />
“I’ve always shared a love for social<br />
“I’ve always shared love for social<br />
media and this was also a way for<br />
media and this was also way for<br />
me to continue using my writing and<br />
me to continue using my writing and<br />
photography skills.”<br />
photography skills.”<br />
Jami works in promotions for Fusion<br />
Jami works in promotions for Fusion<br />
Marketing, as one of the main live<br />
Marketing, as one of the main live<br />
event hosts. “We do live shows for<br />
event<br />
kids and<br />
hosts.<br />
families<br />
“We do<br />
and<br />
live<br />
I<br />
shows<br />
absolutely<br />
for<br />
kids<br />
love<br />
and<br />
it,” said<br />
families<br />
Jami.<br />
and I absolutely<br />
love it,” said Jami.<br />
10<br />
10<br />
JAMI KINTON - STRIVING TO BE ON TOP<br />
JAMI KINTON - STRIVING TO BE ON TOP
“SLEEP WHEN YOU’RE DEAD HAS<br />
ALWAYS BEEN A MOTTO OF<br />
MINE.” - JAMI KINTON<br />
“My life is incredibly busy, but I never say ‘no’ to great<br />
opportunities and have really become a master at multi-tasking<br />
and organization. ‘Sleep when you’re dead’ has always been<br />
a motto of mine,” Jami noted.<br />
Her energy and drive seem endless. But Jami has no shortage<br />
of goals in line. She said she has quite the list planned to<br />
accomplish in the next five years.<br />
“The main ones include achieving a principal role on a sitcom<br />
and a major motion film and publishing a children’s book. I’m<br />
actively working on all three!” she said.<br />
In the mix of everything, Jami keeps up with <strong>UR</strong> <strong>IT</strong> <strong>Magazine</strong>,<br />
which she learned about through a friend who had entered a<br />
model search competition for the magazine last year.<br />
“I began looking into the magazine and loved what I saw, and<br />
thought it would be really fun to be a part of it!”she said. And<br />
<strong>UR</strong> <strong>IT</strong> <strong>Magazine</strong> was happy to have her join the team! This<br />
month, we’re proud to call her our Model of the Month.<br />
“I began looking<br />
into the magazine<br />
and loved what I<br />
saw, and thought it<br />
would be really fun<br />
to be a part of it!”<br />
11
12
13
Do you want to make<br />
a Do fashion you want statement to make in<br />
2016<br />
a fashion<br />
and<br />
statement<br />
be trendy?<br />
in<br />
2016 and be trendy?<br />
If so, ensure that you only buy<br />
what’s If so, ensure in and that only you wear only colors buy<br />
that what’s will in be and the only in-thing. wear colors It is<br />
however that will be important the in-thing. to ensure It is<br />
that however the kind important of fashion to ensure you<br />
choose that the suits kind your of fashion body and you<br />
you<br />
choose<br />
are comfortable<br />
suits your body<br />
in it.<br />
and<br />
you are comfortable in it.<br />
Up Your<br />
Fashion Game<br />
for<br />
2016 Hot Hot Colors<br />
According to to the the Fashion<br />
Snoops Forecast on on 2016 2016<br />
trendy colors, Heirlooms,<br />
Backyard, Desert Bloom Soft Soft<br />
Nostalgia and and Seaside are are<br />
the the 5 5 key key palettes to to don<br />
during this this period. For For neutral<br />
color lovers, desert bloom<br />
2016<br />
Be Be Stylish in in 2016: Hot FashionTrends<br />
Fashion Fashion keeps keeps evolving, evolving, prompting prompting the the need need for for one one to to always always<br />
be be in in the the know know on on what’s what’s in in and and what’s what’s out. out. With With just just 1 month month<br />
left left to to usher usher in in 2016, 2016, designers designers and and image image consultants have have<br />
come come up up with with trendy trendy fashion fashion ideas ideas for for 2016 2016 that that begins begins from from<br />
as as early early as as fall/winter <strong>2015</strong>/2016.<br />
offers a new perspective<br />
that that allows the the use of of cool<br />
base tones and refreshing<br />
colors such as as marigold and<br />
persimmon. The seaside<br />
palette is is characterized by<br />
mid- tone colors such as as coral,<br />
bubblegum pink, custard<br />
melon and chartreuse. In<br />
melon and chartreuse. In<br />
2016, aqua and orchid are<br />
2016, aqua and orchid are<br />
now introduced as emerging<br />
now introduced as emerging<br />
fashion<br />
fashion<br />
colors.<br />
colors.<br />
The<br />
The<br />
heirloom<br />
heirloom<br />
palette<br />
palette<br />
is<br />
is<br />
still<br />
still<br />
dominated<br />
dominated<br />
by<br />
by<br />
green<br />
green<br />
and<br />
and<br />
red<br />
red<br />
where<br />
where<br />
red<br />
red<br />
forms<br />
forms<br />
the<br />
the<br />
basis<br />
basis<br />
for<br />
for<br />
the<br />
the<br />
introduction<br />
introduction<br />
of<br />
of<br />
brighter<br />
brighter<br />
ruby<br />
ruby<br />
and<br />
and<br />
dark<br />
dark<br />
burgundy.<br />
burgundy.<br />
Grape<br />
Grape<br />
purple purple is is also also featured featured as as<br />
a statement color color for for 2016.<br />
Blue Blue hydrangea, pink and<br />
wisteria purple are some of<br />
the the important and elegant soft<br />
nostalgia pastels to wear this<br />
season. Lastly, bright statement<br />
colors in in the backyard palette<br />
such as as candy apple, electric<br />
blue and spring green serve<br />
as as the go-to colors for the<br />
confident attention lovers.<br />
Two-Toned Coats<br />
Despite the intense cold in<br />
winter, the need for class<br />
and sophistication cannot be<br />
14 14<br />
UP YO<strong>UR</strong> FASHION GAME FOR 2016
overemphasized. Two-toned<br />
overemphasized. coats will be the in Two-toned thing.<br />
coats This is a will subtle be the twist in thing. to color<br />
This blocking is a subtle adding twist color to color and<br />
blocking style to how adding people color dress and<br />
style during to winter. how people dress<br />
during winter.<br />
Leather Dresses<br />
Leather Dresses<br />
Whether we like it or not,<br />
Whether fashion has we been like it seen or not, before<br />
fashion and the has new been trends seen just before relive<br />
and previous the new trends. trends Leather just relive<br />
previous<br />
garments<br />
trends.<br />
have been<br />
Leather<br />
there for<br />
garments<br />
decades and<br />
have<br />
2016<br />
been<br />
is<br />
there<br />
the year<br />
for<br />
decades<br />
for leather<br />
and<br />
dresses<br />
2016<br />
all<br />
is the<br />
over<br />
year<br />
for<br />
again,<br />
leather<br />
immensely<br />
dresses<br />
featuring<br />
all over<br />
in<br />
again,<br />
runways<br />
immensely<br />
as must have<br />
featuring<br />
items<br />
in<br />
runways as must have items<br />
for 2016. Pop and rock music<br />
for 2016. Pop and rock music<br />
lovers will definitely love 2016<br />
lovers will definitely love 2016<br />
because it will allow them to<br />
because it will allow them to<br />
express themselves through<br />
express themselves through<br />
different leather designs to<br />
different leather designs to<br />
further complement their style.<br />
further complement their style.<br />
Bomber Jackets<br />
Also Also known as as the the flight flight or or<br />
bombardier jacket, these these<br />
garments were originally<br />
created for for pilots but but with with<br />
time, found their way back<br />
to to the streets. The The beauty of of<br />
these jackets is is their versatility,<br />
looking amazingly good on on any any<br />
outfit whether formal, casual<br />
or or a cocktail dress. Depending<br />
on your preference, you could<br />
wear the all all weather bomber<br />
made of of leather or or buy one<br />
with with refreshed prints prints to to stand stand<br />
out. out. The The bomber bomber cuts cuts through through<br />
different ages ages and and professions,<br />
commonly worn worn by by youngsters<br />
and and 30 30 year year old old stylists, editors,<br />
socialites and and executives. A A<br />
good jacket is is matched by by<br />
complementary shoes and and the the<br />
bomber gives you you a a chance<br />
to to be be as as creative as as possible.<br />
Heels, sneakers, sandals, pumps,<br />
trainers and stilettos all all look look great<br />
when worn with the the jacket.<br />
UP YO<strong>UR</strong> FASHION GAME FOR 2016<br />
15 15
Have you ever found yourself buying something you<br />
don’t need, to make yourself happy? Do you spend<br />
more when you’re stressed or to relieve your mind<br />
from everyday life? We call this ‘Retail therapy’. It’s<br />
one method of stress relievers that many people use<br />
consciously or unconsciously. It’s the act of buying<br />
yourself a little something to boost your mood when<br />
you’re feeling low, and it is more common than you think.<br />
Everyone has a time when then just need to shop.<br />
This can be due to something in your life that makes<br />
you feel this way. And the best part is that shopping<br />
can make you feel better in a helpful way. Not saying<br />
to us this as an excuse to spend your money but<br />
every so often if you feel you have been through a<br />
trying complicated time or if you have done nothing<br />
but work you should be able to go out and do some<br />
shop therapy.<br />
Sharing these moments can be great with friends and<br />
even doing it alone is good too. Shopping is a way<br />
to express your creativity and seek out new things that<br />
make you happy. Whether if it’s shopping for clothing<br />
or candles your bond to have a smile on your face<br />
with you wear that stylish outfit or burn that romance<br />
setting candle.<br />
1. When you look good, you feel good<br />
Buying things you like makes you feel better. Duh.<br />
Whether it’s clothing related or interior design focused<br />
or simply just a pair of socks, you’re purchasing an<br />
item to improve upon your current situation. This<br />
feels right. This feels new.<br />
And those magical high-waisted jeans that suck in<br />
your FUPA after a Sunday Funday of Chinese takeout<br />
makes you feel spectacular (and not to mention 5<br />
pounds lighter). When you believe that you look<br />
great in your outfit, your emotions follow suit.<br />
2. Shopping is a celebration<br />
After a super hard day at work scooping up the latest<br />
must-have leather jacket makes you feel like your<br />
paycheck is all worth it. Or maybe you’re stressed<br />
at home and need to blow off a little steam… from<br />
your wallet.<br />
It’s called “Treat Yo’self” for a reason — because<br />
retail therapy helps us cancel out all the frustrating,<br />
upsetting parts of our day. Took Grandma for her<br />
annual colonoscopy? You deserve a bracelet.<br />
Have to endure a brutal Thanksgiving? You need a<br />
new sweater. Shopping makes dealing with problems<br />
a little easier when you know there’s a reward for<br />
coming out on the other side.<br />
16<br />
WHY SHOPPING IS GOOD FOR YOU - BY TIFFANIE MORA
3. We buy new things to signify transition<br />
To prepare ourselves for new experiences, we<br />
purchase the necessary items. If you’re anxious about<br />
moving away to college, you decorate your new dorm<br />
to feel like home.<br />
Shopping for a baby gets you in the diaper frame of<br />
mind and ready for your baby’s arrival. A new outfit for<br />
a date boosts your self-image. Through our purchases,<br />
we mentally ready ourselves for what lies ahead.<br />
6. It distracts you from failure<br />
Failing sucks. Shopping eases the pain. When you<br />
underperform on a test, instead of reaching for the booze,<br />
you reach for the shoes. As winter creeps in and you<br />
become lazier, shopping is your new cardio. Stuff can’t<br />
replace success, but it sure does ease the blow of losing.<br />
http://elitedaily.com<br />
Everyone has days where they need to spoil themselves<br />
every once in a while. Just don’t make it an everyday<br />
thing that is a completely different topic. Just shop when<br />
you need an uplift it helps and is lots of fun.<br />
4. It’s some good ‘ol me time<br />
Shopping is 97 percent of humanity’s favorite hobby,<br />
(I hear Putin really loves his fur hats). You can spend<br />
time with yourself and your money and focus on the<br />
things we are told shouldn’t really matter.<br />
Retail therapy is a release and it’s fun. Not to sound<br />
like a vapid person, but looking at beautiful things<br />
makes you feel beautiful by association. Just look at<br />
Winona Ryder. She got too close.<br />
5. It’s actually science<br />
Researchers at the University of Michigan Ross<br />
Business School (Go Blue!) found that both the<br />
shopping experience and the choices we make while<br />
we fill our carts help relieve residual sadness.<br />
Good news for shopaholics everywhere, going to<br />
Bloomingdale’s and buying a ton of trendy items will,<br />
in fact, cheer you up! (It’s probably like, 1,000 times<br />
that happiness when you find a coveted over-theknee<br />
boot at a warehouse sample sale.) Even if<br />
you’re a dad whose shopping habits extend as far as<br />
gloves on sale at Costco, you still get the little tingly<br />
feeling inside.<br />
WHY SHOPPING IS GOOD FOR YOU - BY TIFFANIE MORA<br />
17
18
<strong>UR</strong> world<br />
R thoughts<br />
I recently got out of a controlling<br />
Q<br />
relationship. My friends want me to go<br />
out with guys they know and they say<br />
are great guys. I just kind of want to<br />
do my own thing for now. They are afraid I’ll<br />
go back with him if I don’t meet new people.<br />
I’m confused and not sure what to do. Is any<br />
direction better than the other?<br />
A<br />
Dear Confused,<br />
First of all, I wanted to applaud you<br />
for leaving a controlling relationship!<br />
Controlling relationships, by definition,<br />
are often difficult to leave, and successfully<br />
ending this type of relationship is no easy task. It<br />
sounds like your friends care about you and are<br />
supportive of your decision, and their pushing<br />
you to date new men may be their way to help<br />
keep you safe and avoid falling back into the<br />
trap of your previous relationship. However wellintentioned<br />
your friends may be though, it is<br />
clear you are not ready to begin dating right<br />
now. To answer your question: the best direction<br />
to go towards is the one that feels right for you.<br />
Rather than dating new men, your time might<br />
be better spent taking some time for yourself,<br />
healing from your past relationship and learning<br />
about what healthy relationships look like so you<br />
can be better prepared and present in your<br />
next relationship. Working with a therapist on<br />
this, even briefly, could be very helpful.<br />
Good luck!<br />
Christy Beck,<br />
B eck Psychotherapy<br />
<strong>UR</strong> WORLD R THOUGHTS<br />
19
814.201.6213<br />
uritmag.com