Down the Rabbit Hole - Holly Madison

CHAPTER 7
Alice felt so desperate that she was ready to ask help of anyone.
—Lewis Carroll, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland
It was April 2004 and the air had grown stale at the mansion. Bridget and I were constantly at odds
with the other girlfriends. I could sense that even Hef felt he was ready for a change. It was only a
matter of time before Hef started spring-cleaning and invited in a new girlfriend.
And just who would it be?
Please be someone nice, I prayed.
As you might imagine, Hef is both meticulous and exceptionally picky when it comes to his
women: girlfriends, Playmates, etc. He has a picture of every girl that’s ever come to the mansion—
mostly Polaroids. If you were visiting the compound for the first time, a designated staffer would snap
a photo of you before you entered the party (as they did to me years earlier), and those Polaroids
were compiled for Hef to review the next day. He would label them A, B, or C (based primarily on
their looks but also on how scantily clad they were) before having them catalogued in his social
secretary’s office.
The A category was the most elite—meaning those girls were allowed to be invited back for all
events or perhaps even a Playmate test or an evening out with Hef. The B category was reserved for
girls Hef would be comfortable inviting back for larger mansion parties (like Midsummer Night’s
Dream) as well as some of the smaller Fun in the Sun pool parties. The C category was the label
bestowed on girls that were to be invited back only if they were absolutely desperate for more warm
bodies.
Whether it’s for his scrapbooks, his parties, or his magazines, Hef is obsessive about photos.
When I lived there, he still reviewed most of the magazine submissions himself—and always gave his
final sign-off on an issue. He also felt it necessary to see pictures of every model that would be
working one of his parties.
Inside his room there was a calendar of upcoming events, and next to it was a wooden box.
Inside the box were photos of Playmates and potential Playmates attached to a notecard with the girl’s
information printed on it. This was a distinctive pile, because these were the girls Hef was
considering inviting out for a night. Occasionally there would be a pile in front of the box with photos
of girls that had attended a mansion party or girls that had submitted photos to the magazine and
weren’t being considered as Playmates, but were still cute enough for Hef to consider taking out. For