IQ-Magazine-Issue-14

IQ HR
How our relationships
affect our emails
Jacqui Kemp, from Namasté Culture, discusses how our
relationships affect the way we decipher emails
In this electronic age, we rely a lot
on email to communicate at work.
While this can be effective, it has been
found that email is more likely to be
misinterpreted and increase tension.
Research carried out by Professor
Albert Mehrabian found that when
discussing our attitudes or feelings, we
receive the message in the following
way:
7% from the words used
38% from the tone of voice
55% from the body language.
Based on this research, if we are
communicating data by email it should
not be open to misinterpretation,
because we are not sharing attitudes
or feelings.
However, I believe that our attitude
towards the sender can have a negative
impact on the message we take from
the email.
Consider a time when you have
received an email from someone you
had a difficult relationship with; when
the email came in did you look at their
name and think ‘Oh good, I wonder
if this is the information I’ve been
waiting for?’ Or did you look at the
sender’s name and think ‘Now what?’
When I receive emails from someone
I have a difficult relationship with, I
may find my shoulders drop, I slouch
and my chin moves towards my desk.
Neuroscience has found that our
moods are directly affected by our
body language, so by slouching I
have added 55% of negativity to the
message before I have even opened
the email.
I also add a tone of voice to the
message when I am reading it, one
that is less than enthusiastic!
This means that I am only really
receiving 7% of what is being
communicated by the sender
in the words that
they use, and I
have added
the remaining
93% of the
meaning
based on
how I feel
about the
sender.
I am not unique
in this - we all tend
to do it. By becoming
aware that I am adding to
the tension, what I need to do is take
a deep breath when I see those emails
come in, lift my head up and smile
before I open the message. Asking
someone else to read out the email in
a neutral tone of voice can also help
the recipient to get the true meaning.
In the next issue I will talk about how
we can improve our relationships
by becoming aware of our body
language.
More Information
Jacqui Kemp is a trainer and therapist at Namasté Culture.
For more information call 01954 267640 or email jacqui@namasteculture.co.uk
issue 14 | page 57