A CALL TO DIE BOOK - Day 26
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DAY <strong>26</strong>: SEX<br />
DAY <strong>26</strong>: SEX<br />
“But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already<br />
committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to<br />
sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part<br />
of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.” (Matt<br />
5:28-29)<br />
The guy was obsessed with sex. He lived to get in bed with his girlfriend,<br />
and they hopped in the sack at all hours of the day and night. He told<br />
a friend that his mind didn’t drift toward thoughts of sex; it was riveted<br />
on those thoughts! No matter how much sex he had with her, he<br />
craved more. All day every day, all he could think about and dream<br />
about was sex. But it was never enough.<br />
Then, one day, this young man had his life turned upside down by<br />
Jesus Christ. His powerful urges came under the Lord -N ship of Christ,<br />
and the direction of his life changed dramatically.‘ Does this story<br />
sound familiar? Does it sound like a guy you work with or someone in<br />
your chemistry class? The young man lived in the city of Hippo in the<br />
fourth century. His name was ’ Augustine, and he became one of the<br />
greatest Christian leaders ‘ in the history of the church: Saint Augustine.<br />
Sexual lust can be an addiction, for women as well as men. ‘ We<br />
usually think of addictions being connected with a substance ‘ or<br />
drug. In this case, the drug is adrenalin. The rush of sexual experience,<br />
and even of sexual fantasies, sends a surge of ‘addrenalin through our<br />
bodies, and that feeling is addictive-and destructive.<br />
Lust is the belief that sex with that person will meet your needs and<br />
give you fulfi llment. That is a lie, and if it is not arrested, it quickly leads<br />
to sin. How serious is this sin? Jesus must have thought it was pretty<br />
serious because he told his followers to gouge out the lustful eye and<br />
cut off the lustful hand and throw them away. Was he serious? Was this<br />
a metaphor? He continues, “It is better to lose part of your body than<br />
for your whole body to go into hell.”<br />
When Jesus made dramatic statements like this, it means he wants<br />
us to go to the extreme in our devotion to him. In the area of sex, he<br />
wants us to be pure. Completely pure. Too often, I hear young men<br />
and women say they’ve signed a pledge not to have sex until they<br />
are married, but they watch sexually explicit movies, view porn sites on<br />
the web, and talk about sex with their friends. They think they can go<br />
to third base with their dates, and it’s OK because they didn’t go all<br />
the way. Purity means more than not going all the way until marriage.<br />
A lot more. It means we guard our hearts, we protect our minds, we<br />
put a lock on our tongues. It also means we think of others as people<br />
bought by Jesus Christ, not as objects to please our sinful desires.<br />
Our culture is fl ooded by sexual messages. It’s hard to avoid them. But<br />
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DAY <strong>26</strong>: SEX<br />
we need to do just that. Too often, we make excuses like, “Oh, that<br />
doesn’t affect me. I’m used to it.” Paul didn’t brush it off that easily.<br />
Corinth was a city that was much like yours and mine in its obsession<br />
with sex. Paul’s encouragement to the believers in that city was:<br />
“Flee from sexual immorality” (I Cor 6:18). That’s pretty clear. Paul’s<br />
reasoning was that our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, so we<br />
should use our bodies (including our brains) only in ways that honor<br />
God.<br />
In that same passage of scripture, Paul reminds us that we “are not<br />
our own” we have been “bought at a price.” When we are tempted<br />
by lustful thoughts, we need to remember that we have been bought<br />
with a price. We can’t just do whatever our hormones suggest. We<br />
have a much higher calling, a much more important role in the<br />
scheme of things, and a Lord who deserves more from us. When we<br />
look at someone and are stimulated by that person’s appearance or<br />
touch, we need to remember: That is a person for whom Christ died.<br />
He wants the best for him (or her), and I do, too.<br />
Some people will say, “Well, as long as I don’t actually have sex with<br />
that person, it doesn’t matter what I think about.” Jesus doesn’t leave<br />
that door open to us. He says that adulterous thoughts are just as sinful<br />
as the act itself. How can that be true? It is true because sin is primarily<br />
of the heart, and lust is<br />
5. Go to war against your sin. If you struggle with lust (and if you’re<br />
normal, you do), don’t make excuses. Do whatever it takes to focus<br />
your attention on Jesus and off sex. In this passage, Jesus says to<br />
pluck out your lustful eye and cut off your lustful hand. What does<br />
this mean for you and me? It means to take any porn sites off our<br />
browser. It means not going to a certain movie, even if all your friends<br />
are going. It means not participating in a conversation about sex. It<br />
means memorizing scripture and quoting verses when lustful thoughts<br />
fill our minds. It means finding someone to confide in and hold us<br />
accountable if we continue to struggle with lust. It means honoring<br />
Christ with our thoughts, words, and behavior.<br />
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DAY <strong>26</strong>: SEX<br />
If you have already gone far past step 1, this is the time to , turn to<br />
Jesus and be honest about your sin. Confession means that you agree<br />
with him that your sin is wrong, disobedient, and ; destructive. It means<br />
that you will make changes to ensure that it doesn’t happen again.<br />
You can be assured of God’s great forgiveness, and you can also<br />
be sure of his power as you tell that person you must make drastic<br />
changes in your relationship. Get some help. Find a Christian counselor<br />
or pastor to give you encouragement and wisdom so you can stay<br />
strong in the face of confusion and criticism.<br />
6. Wait for God to provide. Many young men and women believe they<br />
need to experiment with as many people as possible in order to find<br />
“the right person.” Even Christians fall into this trap. Instead, we need<br />
to look to God to provide someone for us when and if that is his plan<br />
for us. We are his, and he wants the best for us. We need to find our<br />
completeness in him. That means he will lead us in one of the most<br />
important decisions we will make in our lives.<br />
Avoiding sexual lust is part of the answer. The other part is the pursuit<br />
of purity of heart and mind. The standard Jesus sets is very high in this<br />
area, just as it is in every other area of life: Fall in love with Jesus. Let<br />
him be the one who fills your heart and gives you joy. Then treat every<br />
person and every situation so that Jesus is pleased.<br />
When we deny our selfish ambitions, take up our crosses of obedience,<br />
and follow Jesus in the area of sexual purity, we be different really<br />
different from this culture. When we walk out of a movie or change<br />
a radio station, some will shake their heads, some will condemn, and<br />
some will laugh at us. But Jesus will smile.<br />
-Be still. Listen to what God is saying to you.<br />
1. Think back over the last 24 hours. What sexually suggestive or explicit<br />
messages have you been exposed to (including songs, commercials,<br />
ads, movies, magazines, conversations, web sites, etc.)?<br />
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2. Why do you think Jesus equated lust with the sin of adultery?<br />
3. What does it mean to “pluck out” a lustful eye and “cut off’ a `lustful<br />
hand? (Hint: This is not a call to physically hurt yourself?)<br />
4. What are some ways you can flee sexual immorality? (Think back on<br />
the messages you listed in Question 1. How can you avoid these?)<br />
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5. Describe what it means to be pure in your thoughts and actions<br />
regarding lust and sex.<br />
6. Look over the suggestions. Which of these do you need to act on?<br />
What specific action do you need to take? What assistance do you<br />
need in order to take it?<br />
7. Read Matthew 5:27-32. Think about each verse, then use it as a<br />
guide as you pray.<br />
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DAY <strong>26</strong>: SEX<br />
Memorize: Write Psalm 86:11-12 three times.<br />
Lord, today you are calling me to die to selfish desires by:<br />
You are calling me to obey in these areas<br />
You are calling me to intimacy with you by:<br />
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