Disbanded Brothers – Has a ‘Feminised’ Church Alienated Men in the UK?

spaces (whether playing or watching football, going to the pub, etc.) and other contexts of
their lives are predominantly male, or gender balanced. It is worth recognising that many
men may feel threatened by this unfamiliar minority status. If the adults in the typical church
described by Tearfund (which was only 35% male) were to sit in a circle for a time of worship
or prayer, an average man would have two women on his left and two women on his right,
and he may be tempted to conclude that Christianity is for women rather than men. We turn
now to look at some specific aspects of feminisation.
4.3.1 Church Worship
Perhaps the main focus of those who criticise the Church for having become feminised is
that its worship is too ‘touchy-feely’, overemotional or over-personal. This has been
derogatorily called ‘Jesus is my boyfriend’ (or, more provocatively, ‘girlfriend’) worship. As
Murrow (2005a, 187) argues, “today’s praise music invites the worshipper to assume the
feminine role” and praise music can resemble the Top 40 love songs. 12 Here are three
examples from (many) such worship songs:
“By Your Side” by Noel and Tricia Richards
©1989 Kingsway’s Thankyou Music
By Your side I would stay;
In Your arms I would lay.
Jesus, lover of my soul,
Nothing from You I withhold.
Lord, I love You, and adore You;
What more can I say?
You cause my love to grow stronger
With every passing day.
(Repeat)
“From the Sleep of Ages” by Stuart Townend
©1995 Kingsway’s Thankyou Music
(Based on the ‘beloved’ woman’s responses in Song of Songs 1-2)
From the sleep of ages,
I am stirred by the kiss of love,
By the fragrant perfume
When His name is mentioned.
I have learned to wait for Him,
To receive His presence
With the sound of laughter,
And the joy of resting.
But listen, my Lover
Is coming from heaven’s throne!
Over the mountains, leaping the hills,
He runs like a deer through the open plain;
Gazing through windows,
Peering through doors,
My Lover is calling and calling again…
“What a Friend I’ve Found” by Martin Smith
©1996 Curious? Music UK
What a friend I’ve found,
Closer than a brother;
I have felt Your touch,
More intimate than lovers.
Jesus, Jesus,
12 Pivec (2006, 14) finds corroborative evidence from Dr Barry Liesch, author of The New Worship, that “There’s
definitely a trend toward a more intimate music style.”
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