The Meme Machine

126 THE MEME MACHINE
effort in producing them. From this simple unfairness follows a world of sexual
difference.
For men, the most obvious strategy for passing on the most genes is simply to
mate as often as you can with whomever you can. A common and effective
method is to have one long-term partner whom you protect as well as you can
from other men and whose children you care for, while trying to impregnate as
many other women as you can, ideally without getting caught.
Women will pass on the most genes if they can raise a few high-quality
children with sufficient resources and care to bring them up. This might mean:
(a) mating with a high quality male (i.e. one with good genes), and (b) finding a
male who will provide a lot of parental care. These may not always be the same
man.
One consequence of this disparity is that females need to be far more choosy
about whom they mate with. They do not want to get lumbered with being
pregnant by a lazy, ugly, feeble or unhealthy man who will provide poor genes
and no care and support for them or their infants. This could explain why
women provincially hold back from sex, and more often have to be persuaded or
bought presents. Men do not need to be so choosy. If they can impregnate
almost any female it will be worth the small effort because they will not be left
holding the baby. This can explain why men are normally much more keen to
find sex than women are, and a woman who wants sex can usually find it
without too much trouble – and indeed can get paid for it.
Many people seem to hate the idea that their own sexuality comes down to
such a crude calculation, but the evidence is piling up against the early
anthropologists’ idea that sexual behaviour is completely different in each
culture. More thorough research now shows that men and women conform to
what one would expect based on the principle of higher female parental
investment. Men are keener to have sex and are especially turned on by the idea
(or the actuality) of sex with many different partners, while women are more
choosy and prefer one reliable partner. Prostitution throughout the centuries has
been almost exclusively a service rendered by females and paid for by males.
But what about female beauty? Although a man may not lose much by
mating with almost any woman, his genes will fare best if he can impregnate a
young, healthy and fertile woman. Evolutionary psychologist David Buss found
that in every one of thirty-seven cultures, males preferred younger mates and
females preferred older ones (Buss 1994). This desire for youth and fertility
may explain one of sociobiology’s oft-derided findings that men prefer women
with a low waist-to-hip ratio (Singh 1993). Cultures vary in the preferred