Read the workshop document - No To Violence
Read the workshop document - No To Violence
Read the workshop document - No To Violence
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Working with young people who<br />
use violence in <strong>the</strong> family and/or<br />
in intimate relationships<br />
Mario Pozega<br />
Meridian Youth & Family Services<br />
Anglicare Victoria<br />
7-11 Shipley St, Box Hill, 3128<br />
PH: 9896 6322<br />
Email: mario.pozega@anglicarevic.org.au
Meridian Youth & Family Services<br />
An adolescent counselling service with a<br />
strong emphasis on systemic practice.<br />
With a particular interest in <strong>the</strong> area of<br />
adolescent violence in <strong>the</strong> home.<br />
And <strong>the</strong> related areas of multigenerational<br />
patterns of abuse and <strong>the</strong><br />
impact of trauma.
Working with adolescent violence<br />
A clear stance of non-violence.<br />
Safety is <strong>the</strong> priority.<br />
Looking at <strong>the</strong> whole.<br />
Relationship is important.<br />
Parallel process.<br />
Change is possible.
Engaging & Building Relationship<br />
Various referral points. Often <strong>the</strong> result<br />
of previous family work.<br />
Slowing down <strong>the</strong> process for young<br />
person….. and ourselves!<br />
Encouraging long-term work.<br />
Making space for <strong>the</strong> young person’s<br />
story. The story provides context to <strong>the</strong><br />
violence.
Listening for..<br />
<strong>Violence</strong> as an organising principle.<br />
Protest.<br />
Exceptions.<br />
Beliefs and values.<br />
Experiences of love and<br />
connection.
Humberto Maturana<br />
‘This act is called love, or, if we prefer a milder<br />
expression, <strong>the</strong> acceptance of <strong>the</strong> o<strong>the</strong>r person<br />
beside us in our daily living. This is <strong>the</strong><br />
biological foundation of social phenomena:<br />
without love, without acceptance of o<strong>the</strong>rs<br />
living beside us, <strong>the</strong>re is no social process and,<br />
<strong>the</strong>refore, no humanness.’<br />
Maturana, H.R., Varela, F.J. (1987) The Tree of Knowledge.<br />
Boston; New Science Library 9p. 246)
Looking into <strong>the</strong> future<br />
What else is happening in <strong>the</strong> young<br />
persons life?<br />
What kind of adult do <strong>the</strong>y want to be?<br />
What kind of relationship do <strong>the</strong>y want<br />
with <strong>the</strong>ir family and o<strong>the</strong>rs?<br />
How do <strong>the</strong>y want o<strong>the</strong>rs to see <strong>the</strong>m?<br />
Thickening <strong>the</strong> alternate narrative.
By hearing <strong>the</strong> story..<br />
Modeling mutually respectful<br />
relationship.<br />
Serves as a soo<strong>the</strong>r for young person.<br />
Teaching young person to use language<br />
to express emotion.<br />
Building trust.<br />
Can challenge violence more effectively.
By hearing <strong>the</strong> story..<br />
Using <strong>the</strong>ir picture of <strong>the</strong>mselves in<br />
<strong>the</strong> future to begin to address <strong>the</strong><br />
violence.<br />
Assisting young person to begin<br />
building a case for non-violence.<br />
Provides points of entry for <strong>the</strong><br />
worker.
Conversations about violence<br />
<strong>Violence</strong> is usually in total contrast to<br />
what <strong>the</strong>y are wanting.<br />
Find that violence usually makes it<br />
worse.<br />
Do <strong>the</strong>y want to find different ways of<br />
handling things ra<strong>the</strong>r than using<br />
violence?<br />
Means that young people have to<br />
confront <strong>the</strong>ir own fears and discomfort.
Conversations about violence<br />
How do you think your use of violence effects your<br />
relationships with parents/siblings/partner?<br />
Is violence what you want to stand for?<br />
What will happen if you continue using violence?<br />
How motivated are you to work at not using<br />
violence? What is motivating you?<br />
If someone noticed you having more control what<br />
would <strong>the</strong>y see you doing differently?<br />
What do you think you would notice about<br />
yourself?
Where does <strong>the</strong>ir power lie?<br />
Despite appearing powerful, many<br />
young people feel powerless.<br />
Are <strong>the</strong>y using <strong>the</strong>ir power wisely?<br />
Often <strong>the</strong> only power young people have<br />
is to focus on <strong>the</strong>ir own future picture of<br />
<strong>the</strong>mselves.
Building and managing<br />
family/intimate relationships<br />
Both/and approach. Attending to<br />
violence and relationship.<br />
What can <strong>the</strong>y do to promote better<br />
relationships?<br />
Although, sadly, many times promoting<br />
relationship is not always possible or<br />
appropriate.<br />
Safety is <strong>the</strong> priority.
Languaging<br />
Studies linking learning difficulties and<br />
violence.<br />
Assisting young person to find a voice<br />
that doesn’t include violence.<br />
Assisting young person to notice<br />
feelings and putting into language.<br />
Use of metaphors and analogies.<br />
Scaling.
Self soothing<br />
Often starting at very basic level.<br />
Often never been taught.<br />
Routine is important.<br />
Shifting focus from o<strong>the</strong>rs changing to self.<br />
Linking to values and preferred manner of<br />
living.<br />
Despite sounding simple to us, this is<br />
challenging for young people.
Best interests framework<br />
Five C’s:<br />
Context<br />
Circularity<br />
Constraints<br />
Connectedness<br />
Curiosity<br />
Considering culture as a sixth?
For workers<br />
Own Safety.<br />
Naming violence.<br />
Addressing own fears.<br />
Tracking ra<strong>the</strong>r than jumping.<br />
Seeking support and team.<br />
Thank you!