LERNERT ENGELBERTS Real Bad People - De Harmonie

than ‘you what?’ and because I’d seen it in a book once where they were all talkingwith those old-fashioned words, which I think is really cool.‘What’s your surname?’ she asked. I pointed at Mum, who was done up justlike Claire and she was sitting under a hairdryer hood now too, so I could see whyMrs Hewelt didn’t recognise her.‘My name’s Ralph Woods and we’ve been living here since the spring. If I’mnot very much mistaken, you must be Craig’s mum. I’m in the same class as him, MrGarland’s.’‘That’s right,’ she said, with a friendly smile.She must have had all the boys in town after her when she was younger. Shewas so exquisite and she simply glowed with her white skin and the dimples in hercheeks. She looked just like the sugar angel that Mum put on the Christmas treeevery year, but always told us to keep our fingers off because it was for decoration.Bugger that.‘How are you liking it here in Dorwood? Have you made lots of friends?’ sheasked me.‘Well, actually, no, I haven’t. It’s nice of you to ask though,’ I said. ‘You see, it’sa bit of a troublesome situation.’And then Mrs Hewelt laughed, which a lot of people do when they hear metalk, because they think that the way I speak is a bit odd for an eleven-year-old. I justtalk the way I want to talk, and I use phrases such as ‘I beg your pardon’ and I alsointended to start making use of the new expression I’d learned that day: Top notch.‘I don’t make friends very easily. I’m rather choosy when it comes to friends, Ican tell you. I’ll show you something Craig gave me though if you’re interested.’I pulled up my grubby school jumper and showed her two fresh bruises. Herson had thumped me just above my ribcage with the words: Have a nice holiday. I