My Life

My Life - Oswald Mosleyearlier than my humbler connection with international sport. According to legend, hisdiplomatic skill and Quaker patience had experienced the utmost strain of his careerwhen he was called upon to arbitrate in the heavy-weight boxing, because the teeth ofSouth America had happened to meet in the chest of North America. All lesserdifficulties of politics and diplomacy his charm and skill surmounted with ease, untilat last he was awarded the Nobel Prize. His knowledge of Europe and of foreignaffairs in general can multiply by ten anything available to the Labour Party, yet hehas only been employed in the lesser offices of state. The Labour Party wastes talentas well as promoting characters quite unsuitable to high office.Jack Jones was distinguished in another direction, for he brought to an end in theHouse of Commons the habit of Latin quotation, which he would invariably greetwith a stentorian roar: 'That is the winner of the two-thirty'. Sheridan in an earlierepoch had eliminated Greek with the actor's device of reciting gibberish in anapparently Homeric metre to the wisely nodded assent of the country squires, whowere too irritated by this outsider's trick to be caught twice. Jack Jones was always athis best on the subject of drink, and followed a rather emotional speech from WalterGuinness with the opening remark: 'Now that we've blown the froth off the stout. . .'His more scintillating interventions were in sotto voce asides which could not reachthe Speaker's ear, as his offer to Lady Astor—who had complained of the adverseeffect of alcohol on the human stomach—that as a life-long consumer he was ready toput his stomach against the noble lady's any night she liked. His clash with SirDouglas Hogg did reach the Speaker's ear in crescendo. The able and equable figureof the Attorney-General always irritated the member for Silvertown, who on oneoccasion persisted in interrupting him from a high perch beneath the side gallery, untilordered to leave the Chamber. During his stately exit Mr. Jones paused at eachsupporting pillar of the gallery to hurl a fresh insult, with answering roars of 'Order!'Finally, before disappearing through the swing-door with an indignant crash, hedelivered himself of a brief but pointed allocution:' 'Ogg's yer name and 'ogg yer are,'ogg, 'ogg, 'ogg—bloody pig'.I have only seen the House so convulsed on one other occasion, and for a verydifferent reason. The scene was the presentation of a Private Member's Bill byCommander Kenworthy, ex-heavy-weight champion of the Navy, of swarthycountenance and determined aspect. He entered the House of Commons in the Liberalinterest by defeating Lord Eustace Percy at Hull in a sensational by-election. TheHouse had long been prepared for the dramatic occasion by the histrionic appearancesof the Commander, who displayed a brassy effrontery on every possible parliamentaryopportunity where a noisy persistence could claim the publicity sometimes denied toeloquence. The generally risible effect of his orations was enhanced by this monsterof virility having an almost feminine lisp which turned every V into a 'w'. Thispeculiarity, coupled with a considerable sense of the dramatic, but none of theincongruous, produced many happy occasions. Speaking on Africa he declared: 'Now,Mr. Speaker, you see wising before you this gweat big black pewil'; and on navalairships, with passion: 'Mr. Speaker, we have had enough of these gweat gasbags'.Delighted cheers would greet these announcements, but the loudest applause wasreserved for his subtler occasions. Speaking on the miserable lot of some refugeeswho had been forced to take to the road he said: 'There they were, Mr. Speaker,carrying with them their little household gods; yes Sir, holding in their hands theirpenes and Penates'. This, of course, brought down a House still versed in the elements178 of 424