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Around the World in 88 Years -E Book - Arthur Burt

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As <strong>the</strong> girls rowed <strong>in</strong> front of us, one of <strong>the</strong>m pulled hard on <strong>the</strong>oars, and as she did, she opened her legs. I had a view and fellout with God. “You don’t help me at all,” I accused Him. “I’mtry<strong>in</strong>g to please you, and <strong>the</strong>n you put someth<strong>in</strong>g like that <strong>in</strong>front of me. I’m through try<strong>in</strong>g and I’m not go<strong>in</strong>g to bo<strong>the</strong>r anymore!”I didn’t say this out loud <strong>in</strong> front of my mo<strong>the</strong>r; she thoughtI was wonderful.So, I blamed God. After that, I went down <strong>the</strong> sands <strong>in</strong> Blackpool,decid<strong>in</strong>g to stare at every girl I would see, everybody who hadlegs. Right <strong>in</strong> <strong>the</strong> middle of it, <strong>the</strong> presence of God just smo<strong>the</strong>redand covered me with His love.“Oh, Jesus,” I prayed. “How can You love me <strong>in</strong> <strong>the</strong> midst of mydeliberate rebellion like this? Lord, Oh Lord, how gracious Youare.” I was broken but had revelation.God told me, “Stop fight<strong>in</strong>g Me and beg<strong>in</strong> <strong>in</strong>vit<strong>in</strong>g Me <strong>in</strong>to <strong>the</strong>situation. Watch Me work <strong>in</strong> you <strong>in</strong>stead of fight<strong>in</strong>g to prove youcan do someth<strong>in</strong>g. Without Me, you can do noth<strong>in</strong>g.”While this encounter with God had changed th<strong>in</strong>gs, I still hadn’tdealt with my perception of my unattractiveness. When I sawo<strong>the</strong>r young men chas<strong>in</strong>g girls, I judged <strong>the</strong>m. The Bible warns,“Judge not, that ye be not judged.” (Matt 7:1) But I did judge. Iexalted myself and said, “They do such th<strong>in</strong>gs, but I don’t. I havesurrendered to God.” The truth was… that only my belief I wasugly prevented me from chas<strong>in</strong>g and flirt<strong>in</strong>g with girls.1940. My Achilles heelNow back to my Achilles heel. The young woman pastor hadjust confessed to me she thought God had allowed her heart togo out to me.“I am court<strong>in</strong>g a young lady,” I replied.“Well,” she countered, look<strong>in</strong>g <strong>in</strong>tently at me. “Marj could die;couldn’t she? If it is <strong>the</strong> will of God, she could die.”I left with doubts beg<strong>in</strong>n<strong>in</strong>g to assault me. I churned <strong>in</strong>side forweeks. Had I made a mistake? Was Marj <strong>the</strong> woman God hadappo<strong>in</strong>ted as my wife? Could it be possible this young womanwas God’s chosen for me?69

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