First Ever E-Magazine | December 2011 | www ... - Oshwal Centre

Peaks and troughs of a Family Facing a Disability IssueBy, Urvina and Vijal ShahDisability in whatever varied form it arises is like ahurricane that swirls around furiously and has animpact reaching far beyond its central core called"the eye". However, unlike the natural versionwhere the spiralling wind and storms eventually fizzle out,the storms created by a disability in most cases is for alifetime and i ts trail of emotions is a t angled web thatknows no end.The spectrum of emotions is such that a mere article suchas this only provides a cursory glance into anenvironment that at one e nd is full of distress and w oeand at the other also immensely enriching.In our case, faced with a young child with a learningdisability i.e. a virtual disability buried deep into the child’spsyche, the rollercoaster of emotions - the peaks andtroughs - are challenging to say the least.TroughsThe emotional terrain encountered ranges fromconfusion, denial, sense of loss, hopelessness, anger andmost worrying of all is the uncertain future that the childwill face as she gets older in a world that is increasinglyintolerant. For the parents, siblings and the extendedfamily their state of mind is always on a cliff-edge.The impact of the disability on the entire family is aunique family experience and affects all aspects of familyfunctioning. For example:emotional and verbal communication at all times anddiffusing any other noise from this.Relationship impact with extended family – this can bechallenging as members of the extended family, whilstsupportive and providing a haven for emotional respite forthe parents or the siblings are nevertheless bystanders tothe drama occurring on the front line.Financial costs – family financial resources willinevitably be strained as these will be diverted totreatments, consultations and schooling if applicable forthe affected child and at the same time balancing thefinancial needs for the rest of the family.PeaksWithout demeaning or denying the challenges presentedto families with a disabled person, there are manypositive aspects that we as a f amily unit have gainedsuch as:• Not to take things for granted• Tolerance and sensitivity• Learning to be patient• Putting oneself in the world view of the affected childbuilding a greater knowledge about disability issues.• Expanding a wider social network to encourage aChanges in home routines – this has to bespecifically set out from the outset andweighted more towards the affected childthan others – scope for spontaneity islimited.Relationships between siblings – this canbe strained due to lack of understanding,particularly when siblings are at an agewhere tolerance levels have not matured.Vocational life – Professionalgoals/aspirations and basic life assumptionswhen starting up a family need to beevaluated to align the demands of theaffected child.Relationship impact between the parents– the strength of this is of paramountimportance and the key to this is maintainingOshwal News E-Magazine of the O.A.U.K. 22 December 2011 Edition