English - Balay Mindanaw

Part 2 - Four Datus: Stories of the Higaunon Lifeon their culture and tradition, so how could he think ofmarrying a Dumagat?His wife Bae Lilok is a member of the Damitan family ofSitio Malagwas of Kalipay. They proposed through a pamalayior nagugsak, a pre-marriage activity wherein the groom’sfamily would bring cooking pots, plates, and clothes to thebride’s parents. Tatay Malindahay narrated his experiencethis way:“The male elders would talk. The datu particularly wouldbe the one to relay the male party’s intentions. This is stillpart of the courting process; no agreements yet. You wouldknow if your proposal was accepted because all the thingsyou brought -- like the cloths, cooking pots and other things-- are not returned. If they reject your proposal, they wouldstill accept your gifts, but as a sign for you not to pursue yourintentions, they would later return everything, and evendouble the amount of stuff you brought. It’s like being told,‘Don’t worry being rejected; you’re getting all your thingsback anyway, and more.’”After their marriage, Tatay Malindahay stayed in hiswife’s residence for about two years. It is their practice thatthe newlyweds stay at the bride’s house for years after theirwedding. Tatay Malindahay and his wife were blessed witheight children.They eventually moved to Kalipay proper. Therethey sought the help of a certain Mrs. Locsin for possibleemployment in the logging company. He was hired as aconcession guard with the task of protecting the area fromthe kaingeñeros and squatters. Biernatzki (1973:44) observedthat datus were the preferred candidates for the positionof concession guard because of their ability to control theirband and “prevent the unauthorized cutting of commerciallyvaluable trees.”67