May 20, 2010 - Eastern Band of Cherokee

HEALTH TALKStories of Abuse SurvivorsEach and every month we try to bring awareessinto the community eye, as regrettably as it is, theres violence occurring here in each of our communities.he most important aspect of our focus is always theictims, who suffer, often in silence, unbeknownst tonyone around them. The victims, the survivors, theilent sufferers, they are why we publicize a differentopic every month, in honor of them. Our goal is to raisewareness about these issues and educate, support, help,r comfort as many people as possible.Sexual and domestic violence are personal to usbecause we work with victims, but not everyone isaware of the impact it has on you to hear about thetrauma. We wanted to provide some excerpts of storieswritten and published by survivors.“I am confused; I need to understand what happened tome. I am 16, my boyfriend 19, I told him I was not readyfor us to move further in our relationship, and he pressuredme, told me he would leave me if I didn’t. He saidf I loved him then I would, I still wouldn’t then he gote drunk, & kept begging me saying these things, I did-’t want to, but he forced me, I can’t stop crying. Ihought he loved me”I am finally reaching out for help, in hopes of savingy marriage. I am 30 years old, & have never told anyonethat I was sexually abused when I was 10 years oldby an older cousin. I thought I hid my secret deep downwhere I would never remember it, but it didn’t work. Mymarriage is a mess because of the issues that still hauntme because of the abuse I never told anyone about, untilnow.”“When I got home, I spent hours in the bathroom tryingto wash him off of me, but his smell & the filth I feltwould not wash away. I felt like a human trash can. Idismissed the night as being one of miscommunicationuntil one night when I finally broke down in the bathroomafter bottling up all my shame and hurt feelings.What happened to me was confusing, I felt hurt,ashamed, violated, and still kept blaming myself forwhat happened.”“Like many victims of sexual attacks, I was silenced bymy shame, guilt, and the mistaken belief, reinforced bythe police and society in general...that I was "responsible"for what these men did to me. It is that silence thatrevictimizes rape and incest victims, over and overagain, and I won't be silent anymore.”As difficult as it is to read these personal storiesof actual survivors, imagine the courage it takes to saythese words, finally, if ever. Even talking about sexualassault can be difficult because of the risk of being disbelievedor rejected. The truth is that rape is never thefault of the victim. Most victims never speak or reachout for help, but these few did. They did, all with the intentof helping or encouraging another victim, scared totake that step.How YOU can Stop the Violence:1) Don’t be a Bystander to violence.2) Believe the victim.3) Listen to the victim and let them know you care.4) Support the victim and connect them with communityresources (medical, emotional, legal).- Source: EBCI Domesc Violence/Sexual AssaultProgramOne FeatherdeadlineTuesday at 12noonEXTENDE ED HOURS.JUS ST FORYOU U!FROMJUNE1–5,WE’LLBEOPENUNTIL9PME OPEN UNTIL PMTO BETTER SERVE YOU.Call to setupan appointmentwithoneofourSalesRepresentativesof ourtocheckoutourwidevarietyout ourof plansanddevices!LG CosmosDROID INCREDIBLEby HTCLG enV® TOUCH Whenyouwantyourwirelessnetworktowork,youwantVerizon.nt your wireless network to work,erizon.14cherokee one featherTHURSDAY, MAY 20, 2010