A special way of communicating - Alzheimer's Association

Our world: The heavy
toll of Alzheimer’s
By Rufus Woods
Excerpt from the September 5, 2008
edition of The Wenatchee World.
Reprinted with permission.
You don’t have to look very far to find
families that have been profoundly
affected by Alzheimer’s.
It’s devastating and frightening for
those who are in the early stages of the
disease, but the families pay the biggest
price when a loved one can no longer
remember the past or the people
around them.
People don’t like to talk about it, as if
by not discussing it, perhaps it won’t
affect them.That's the observation of
Mike Armstrong, Chelan County Port
District’s director of external affairs and
a legislator.
Armstrong came face-to-face with
Alzheimer’s a year ago when his mother,
Joanne Sauer, was diagnosed with the
disease.Armstrong and his niece, Brittany
Smith, visited with me last week about
the ordeal. It was an emotional meeting
as Smith and Armstrong recounted
Joanne Sauer’s mental decline and her
passing in February.
Armstrong remembers vividly the day
his mother asked him to bring a gun.
“Please just kill me, get me out of
here,” she pleaded. It was a scene she
repeated on several occasions with her
granddaughter Brittany.
The disease was robbing her of her
ability to remember, but she was in
what they call a transitional phase, and
she was terrified.This woman, who had
raised three young kids mostly on her
own and who was always in control,
was losing it, and in her lucid moments
she knew it.
4
Joanne Sauer with her great-granddaughter,
Julianna.
Armstrong’s reaction to his mother's
distress? “You know she's in hell and you
couldn't do anything about it,” he recounted.
So much anxiety, so much fear
and very little anyone could do to help.
Sauer was first diagnosed by the folks at
Central Washington Hospital, where
she was taken after suffering a fall.The
family had been seeing signs, but Sauer
had covered her deterioration well, as
Alzheimer’s patients typically do.
The diagnosis led to further tests and a
determination by the family that she
couldn’t go home and needed full-time
care.At a visit to the Alzheimer’s unit
at Highgate Senior Living, the crushing
reality set in.Touring the Cottage, a
facility for those in the advanced stages
of the disease,Armstrong said, within
15 minutes he had to leave because he
found it so overwhelming.
It’s one thing to take a tour of the place,
but when you’re considering putting a
loved one in that environment, it really
hits home, said Armstrong.
Kerrie Mitchell, Highgate’s community
relations coordinator, said many families
don’t seek outside help and try to keep
loved ones at home far too long.
Family dynamics that are involved in
making those decisions are
excruciating, she acknowledged.
For Sauer, the descent was very fast.
After the diagnosis, she lasted only
seven months or so, and the family
rallied to her side.As time went on,
she was there mentally with them
less and less, but there were flashes
of recognition.
There were lots of difficult moments,
but also some moments of joy and
humor.Armstrong talked about the
time a fellow patient came by and
started rubbing his mother’s arm,
annoying her.“She's cracked,” Sauer
told him as the woman walked off,
Armstrong recounted with a chuckle.
Smith said what she cherishes is the
fact that the family had the opportunity
to say goodbye in meaningful ways.
They knew the end was coming and
they were able to say the things that
needed to be said.
The family will be honoring Joanne
Sauer’s life by participating in a
Memory Walk in Seattle sponsored by
the Alzheimer’s Association on Sunday,
Sept. 14.They've raised $4,400 thus far
and hope to raise $10,000 in support of
research for a cure. Details can be
found online at
www.alz.com/memorywalk/.
Rufus Woods is editor and publisher of
The Wenatchee World. Reach him at
(509)665-1162 or rwoods@wenworld.com.
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