It's not her fault you can't get - Focus on Women Magazine

A Publicationfor the Conscious WomanJanuary/February 200Self-Control isContagiousInsIde:An Olympian’s StoryS.I.M.P.L.I.F.Y. L.I.F.EBring onthe Angels!New Year’s Resolutions That Work!For Women, To Women, About Women

Dates for up-comingMaryland RetrovailleWeekends for 2010are May 14-16 &September10-12.It’s <strong>not</strong> <strong>her</strong> <strong>fault</strong> <strong>you</strong> can’t <strong>get</strong> along!But kid’s usually suffer the most when parents can’t <strong>get</strong> along or worse, divorce.• Do <strong>you</strong> feel lost and alone?• Are <strong>you</strong> frustrated, hurt or angry with each ot<strong>her</strong>?• Are <strong>you</strong> constantly fighting? Or, do <strong>you</strong> simply shut down?• Have <strong>you</strong> thought about separation or divorce?• Does talking about it only make it worse?• Don’t know what to do or w<strong>her</strong>e to turn?Retrouvaille can help!Retrouvaille provides tools to help put <strong>you</strong>r marriage inorder again. The emphasis is on communication betweenhusband and wife. It will give <strong>you</strong> the opportunity torediscover each ot<strong>her</strong> and examine <strong>you</strong>r lives to<strong>get</strong><strong>her</strong> in anew and positive way.Tens of thousands of couples have successfully savedtheir marriages by attending this program.The program is <strong>not</strong> a retreat, counseling or a sensitivitygroup. T<strong>her</strong>e are neit<strong>her</strong> group dynamics nor groupdiscussions on the weekend. It is <strong>not</strong> a time for hurting; itis a time for healing.During the weekend and post weekend sessions, the teampresents a technique of communication that enables <strong>you</strong>to take a good look at most areas of <strong>you</strong>r relationship.www.HelpOurMarriage.com800-470-2230Do a good deed. Share this ad with someone who might need it. All inquiries are held in strictest confidence.

January/February 200Table of ContentsDepartmentsIn View:Publis<strong>her</strong>s Note 4Legislative Look:Hot List 26Scoping Out:Calendar of Events 37<strong>Focus</strong>ed WomenContest 42<strong>Focus</strong> on Women MagazineWants You...• To submit story ideas.• To submit suggestions.• To submit ideas that can empower us to giveour readers more resources and information.• To subscribe to our magazine.Contact us at <strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazinee-mail: nicbri@focusonwomenmagazine.net,Fax: 410-740-9210, Phone: 410-294-2932, ormail: 4615 Oakview Ct., Ellicott City, MD 21042.She’s an Olympian 17Valentine’s Day and Relationships 18New Year’s Resolutions That Work! 19Bring on the Angels! 12Maryland Women’s History Project 14Self-Control Is Contagious 16Retail Health Clinic Growth Expected 18Constellations Plus 20Simplify Life 22Dial Down the Stress 24Concerned Singles 25Open Talk: Ovarian Cancer 28Students Not Left in Cold 30Pregnancy w/o Foot Pain 32Restaurant Review: Corks 36Music Review: 38“Trapeze Album by Hu Dost”Volunteering to Help Ot<strong>her</strong>s 40… and YourselfFor Women, To Women, About Women

In ViewFrom the Publis<strong>her</strong>Our footprints weave the intricately wovenpath of our lives called our earth walk. Weare stewards of this tapestry which uniquelycreates us, our true selves and life scenarios.The threads and fibers create a life path toreach out to ot<strong>her</strong>s through a helping hand,an encouraging word or unwavering supportduring times of challenge and great change.This earth walk makes for patterns, uniquelywoven and wonderfully made. Our promenadecreates a tapestry of greater meaningand if we read it closely enough and examineits messages, we can find peace, fulfill ourpurpose or find answers to questions burieddeep inside of ourselves. As we embark upona new decade, may we read closely the patternsof our lives, giving us greater understandingand deeper insight into ourselvesand ot<strong>her</strong>s. To our readers, supporters andadvertisers, may <strong>you</strong> too find peace throughexamining this tapestry of life and maythe New Year bring <strong>you</strong> insight, health andabundance.All the best,Joslyn Wolfe“Knowledge is loveand lightand vision.”— Helen Kellerwww.focusonwomenmagazine.comnicbri@focusonwomenmagazine.net<strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine is a bi-monthlypublication for women, to women, and aboutwomen, which focuses on topics of interest towomen and is geared towards a multi-generationalaudience.Publis<strong>her</strong>: Joslyn WolfeEditor: Kathy PettwayDesign/Production: Michael Dion/MDGraphicsContributors: Shirley Wilcox, Norma Hill, TerriBrooks, J.W. Arnovits, Rashida Still, Liz Bobo,Jaana Myllyluoma, Jill Greenberg, Traci Barnett,Natalia Hart, Noelle Schiffer, Dr. LeslieBeth Wish,Sam Fahmy, Ann McGill, Rick D. Niece, SarahMcLean, Rodelinde Albrecht, Jamie Lober<strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine (FOWM) ispublished bi-monthly, on or about the 10th of themonth by <strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine LLC, 4615Oakview Ct.., Ellicott City, MD 21042. Phone:410-294-2932. It is available by subscription, ondisplay stands and at approved public and privatevenues throughout the Baltimore Metropolitanarea, including Baltimore City, Baltimore County,Ellicott City, and Columbia. The editorial contentof FOWM does <strong>not</strong> necessarily reflect the views ofour advertisers or readers. FOWM is <strong>not</strong> responsiblefor editorial comment ot<strong>her</strong> than its own.For story ideas, calendar events, or ads, contact<strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine at nicbri@focusonwomenmagazine.net,by fax at 410-740-9210,by phone at 410-294-2932, or by mail at 4615Oakview Court, Ellicott City, MD 21042.© 2009 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine. All rightsreserved. No part of this publication can be reproducedwithout prior express written consent of thepublis<strong>her</strong>.Advertising: <strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine(FOWM) reserves the right to reject, revise orcancel any advertisement that does <strong>not</strong> meet thestandards of its advisory board. Acceptance of advertisingdoes <strong>not</strong> carry with it an endorsement bythe publis<strong>her</strong> of FOWM. The advertiser assumessole responsibility for all statements contained insubmitted copy and will indemnify FOWM’s owners,publis<strong>her</strong>s, and employees against any and allliability, loss, or expense arising out of claims forlibel, unfair trade names, patents, copyrights andproprietary rights. FOWM shall <strong>not</strong> be liable forfailure for any reason to insert an advertisementnor shall it be liable for reason of error, omission,or failure to insert any part of an advertisement.FOWM will <strong>not</strong> be liable for the delay or failure inperformance in publication or distribution, if all orany portion of an issue is delayed or suspended forany reason. FOWM will exercise provident judgmentin such instance and will make adjustmentsfor the advertiser whenever and w<strong>her</strong>ever possibleand as deemed appropriate. FOWM will <strong>not</strong> be responsiblefor unsolicited material or reproductionsmade by advertisers.<strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine

For Women, To Women, About Women

AddingHerstoryto Historyto TellOurstoryCelebrating theWomen of Maryland:Past, Present, & FutureWe invite all who wish to honorthe history and contributionsof our diverse foremot<strong>her</strong>sto join us in supportingthe creation of this historic first.501(c)(3) Non-Profit Organization410-767-0675www.MDWomensHeritageCenter.org<strong>Focus</strong> on Women MagazineThe first comprehensive state center and museum of itskind in the nation—it will provide a place to learn andteach about the contributions of Maryland women andgirls throughout the State’s history.The Maryland Women’s Heritage Center will feature:• Permanent and changing exhibits about individuals,events, and special topics• Information and activities about renowned Maryland womensuch as those in the Maryland Women’s Hall of Fame• Special recognition of the innumerable “unsung <strong>her</strong>oines”in our families and communities• An interactive, state-of-the-art student learning center• A resource and reference library• A women’s history archive• Displays of arts and crafts• Dramatic, musical, and dance performances byMaryland women and girls• Dialogues and seminars on women’s issues• Space for special events and receptions• A gift shop with art, literature and unique giftsby Maryland women

She’s anOlympianGrowing up inUtah didn’t hurt,but having parentswho <strong>not</strong>iced<strong>her</strong> talent earlyon as a skier was even better.Olympic medalist, TammyErickson was a prodigy atfive on skis. “I pretty muchhad ski boots in my crib,”she says. “I started skiingwhen I was in Kindergarten.”According to Erickson,compared to today’sstandards, skiing in Kindergartenand <strong>not</strong> earlierwould stamp <strong>her</strong> as a “latebloomer.”Having the talent to makethe U. S Ski Team at 12, andcompeting internationallyand professionally from 1978to 2002, skiing took Ericksonthrough numerous tours ofEurope, spanning from Polandto Italy, sometimes withparents and sometimes withsurrogates.For Erickson, skiing cameeasy. With parents who fullysupported <strong>her</strong>, plus havinga strong taste for the sport,she found it an easy passionto pursue. “It kept me outof the house,” chuckles theBerkley graduate of biologyand mot<strong>her</strong> of two, oneof whom recently earned aMedical Degree from Stanfordand the ot<strong>her</strong> who worksas a photojournalist.Earning the right to ski ona professional level brought amyriad of complexities to <strong>her</strong>life. “In Utah, <strong>you</strong> have toearn a certain GPA in orderto ski... when I was on tour,from high school to college, Ihad tutors who travelled withme,” she says.Skiing, says Erickson, isindeed a high-risk sport.Noting how she blew bothknees twice, dislocated <strong>her</strong>shoulder, broke ribs, incurreda concussion, andripped the ligaments in <strong>her</strong>right hand, she realized following<strong>her</strong> competition inthe 2002 Olympics, it wastime for the sunset—but <strong>not</strong>completely.“When I stopped professionally,I wanted to knowhow to use the knowledge Ihad to meet ot<strong>her</strong> women’sfitness goals. Some may wantto run a marathon, some maywant to meet weight goals,”says the current owner ofCurves, a fitness and weightlossgym solely for women.Now in business for fiveyears, through Curves,Erickson provides a way todeliver cutting edge fitnessand nutrition goals to women.“The industry I was in wasvery male dominated,” shesays. “I am happy to use mybackground knowledge andexperiences to help ot<strong>her</strong>women.”For Women, To Women, About Women

Valentine’s Day and Relationships–“Why He Won’t Marry You”Q&A with Prof. Daniel L. Buccino, LCSW-C, BCD, Johns Hopkins Medical SchoolQ. Why is it that some menare reluctant to marry?I see more and more longtermcouples in counselingwho appear deeply committedbut are just <strong>not</strong> able totake the final step to thealtar. Marriage and familyremain goals for mostcouples but many people havedifficulty turning the dreaminto reality. Obviously, giventhe high divorce rate, manymore have difficulty sustainingthe reality of marriageonce the dream fades. Somemen may <strong>not</strong> want to <strong>get</strong>married because:• He is “in love” with <strong>her</strong>,but doesn’t really love <strong>her</strong>as a person.• To him being in lovemeans it’s still just allabout the sex.• Unfortunately, he’s really“just <strong>not</strong> that into <strong>her</strong>.”• Perhaps he is seeing someoneelse.Q. This isn’t a very encouraginglist and are<strong>you</strong> saying that some mencan’t tell the differencebetween real love andsexual desire?Well, I hear this frommany men—“I love <strong>her</strong>, butI’m <strong>not</strong> in love with <strong>her</strong>.” Ihave come to understand thisto mean that the initial lusty,early days of the relationshiphave worn off and now thingsare a little less frisky, so menmay worry that this meansthey are falling out of love. Itmay mean, rat<strong>her</strong>, that thecouple is actually moving toa more enduring stage of t<strong>her</strong>elationship.Some ot<strong>her</strong> reasons a manmay <strong>not</strong> want to walk downthe aisle are:• He’s spoiled for choice—t<strong>her</strong>e are just too manypossibilities in the big cityand he’s waiting to see ifhe can find a “better deal.”• Because of the ease ofmeeting potential romanticpartners via the Internetthrough social networking,“sexting,” texting, and“hooking up,” serious datingand commitment maybe becoming a thing of thepast.Q. This sounds like morebad news for women whowant to <strong>get</strong> married.The contemporary datingscene does offer many moreoptions than previous eras.This paradox of choice andabundance of choice can actuallylead to paralysis whenone is faced with too manyoptions. This can sometimeslead to couples having difficultycommitting and settlingdown because they areafraid they may just be “settling,”and that t<strong>her</strong>e may bea<strong>not</strong><strong>her</strong> better option behindthe next social network post.Here are additional reasonswhy some men just can’tseem to make the ultimatecommitment.• Maybe because in today’seconomy she has a job andhe doesn’t.• Maybe because in today’seconomy he has a job andshe doesn’t.• Maybe because theyhaven’t been dating “longenough.”• Maybe he believes she iscoming on too strong.• Maybe he thinks he can’twin, because, as ChrisRock said, “married peopleare bored and single peopleare lonely.”• Maybe he’s never seen anexample of a good, stable,long-lasting relationship.• Maybe he is <strong>not</strong> responsible,reliable, trustworthy,competent, and focused.• Maybe he thinks she is<strong>not</strong> responsible, reliable,trustworthy, competent,and focused.• Maybe he thinks she is tooself-sufficient, she doesn’tneed anything, including ahusband, or more specifically,him.Prof. Daniel L. Buccino, LCSW-C, BCD,is a social worker and the clinical supervisorand student coordinator of theAdult Outpatient Community PsychiatryProgram at the Johns Hopkins BayviewMedical Center. He is also an assistantprofessor in the Department of Psychiatryand Behavioral Sciences JohnsHopkins University School of Medicine.Prof. Buccino is co-founded the BaltimorePsychot<strong>her</strong>apy Institute w<strong>her</strong>e hespecializes in providing psychot<strong>her</strong>apyfor individuals, couples, and families.He can be reached directly at dbuccino@jhmi.eduor (410) 550-0105.<strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine

New Year’s ResolutionsThat Work!By Dr. LeslieBeth Wish, MSWIt’s holiday time ofyear again whenthoughts turn to shopping,giving, partyingand—yes—makingNew Years’ resolutions. Evenif a person doesn’t want tomake them, reminders aboutresolutions are on the Internet,talk shows, the news andmagazines. Unfortunately,these reminders highlightlast year’s broken promisesand the reality of breakingthe same or new ones thiscoming year.Many people avoid makingthem and secretly areashamed of their previousfailure. Jeanie, a teac<strong>her</strong>,summed up the feelings perfectly:“It’s like starting theNew Year already defeated.”The following guide tomaking resolutions that workcan’t guarantee success, butit can lay the groundwork forchanging old habits.Start SmallOne of the major problemswith resolutions is that thefreshness of the New Yearoften propels people to thinktoo big. It’s easy to <strong>get</strong> sweptup into the appeal of a cleanslate and make big promisesto change old habits such asquitting cigarettes or wakingup earlier.Janet, a free-lance writer,got caught up in false hopesby vowing to wake up beforesix-thirty every morning. Bythe third day, she had broken<strong>her</strong> promise twice. A wiserplan would have been to goto bed earlier once a week,plan to wake up earlier thenext morning and then addmore days slowly a week at atime.Don’t take on too manyresolutions at once. Janetthought she could both wakeup earlier and then run twomiles.Expect the InevitableDiscomfort & Anxiety ThatAccompany ChangeOne of the mixed blessingsabout being human is theability to manage pain, insecurities,anxieties and ot<strong>her</strong>problems through behaviorsthat work well enough. Forexample, eating may <strong>not</strong>be the best way to soothefeelings, but it works wellenough so that giving up oldeating habits then becomesat least as difficult as continuingto eat unwisely.In general, behaviors thatare biologically-based are themost troublesome to modify.These behaviors includeactions that involve angerand aggression and all thepleasure-inducing activitiessuch as sex, gambling, drinking,eating and shopping.Not surprisingly, becausepeople are prone to excessesin these areas, promises tochange these tendenciesmake up the bulk of NewYears resolutions.It takes tremendous willpower to alter dishearteninghabits. As a result, manypeople fool themselves intothinking that the beginningof a New Year is a potentenough motivator. Suchhopes result in global andbittersweet resolutions thatare doomed to fail. A typicallist of these resolutionsincludes:• I promise <strong>not</strong> to hidemy purchases from myhusband.• I promise <strong>not</strong> to eat candyand junk food while drivingalone.• I promise to fit into myhigh school clothes.• I promise <strong>not</strong> to <strong>get</strong> upsetany more with my pet,family and colleagues.• I promise <strong>not</strong> to be sexuallyturned on by lookingat ot<strong>her</strong> people.• I promise <strong>not</strong> to lie to mypartner—at least <strong>not</strong> biglies.• I promise <strong>not</strong> to fudge mywork at my job—at least<strong>not</strong> big fudges.• I promise to stop cheatingon my partner.• I promise <strong>not</strong> to lie aboutdents in the car.• I promise <strong>not</strong> to carry abalance on my credit card.• I promise <strong>not</strong> to buy thingsI don’t really need—whateverthat means.Making resolutions thataddress these issues, however,is often the most importantdecision. Aim smallFor Women, To Women, About Women

Review This List and ReadOt<strong>her</strong> Articles About Tips forNew Year’s ResolutionsPeople learn through repetition.Several times a year,on key occasions, use thehelpful information to reinforceefforts to sustain andmake changes.T<strong>her</strong>e are no best resolutions.They vary with theperson. However, smart onesinclude promises such as:• I promise to join a weightprogram and gym andwork out wisely with agroup of friends.• I promise to <strong>get</strong> a medicalphysical.• I promise to pay attentionto warning symptoms thatI am <strong>not</strong> well.• I promise to join AA orot<strong>her</strong> similar groupsfor my substance abuseproblems.• I promise to recruit familymembers and friendsto help me with all myresolutions.• I promise to seek professional,psychological helpfor my difficulties.• I promise to be a volunteerfor a charitableorganization.• I promise to <strong>get</strong> financialcounseling from my bankor place of work.• I promise to take short vacationsor breaks to relievestress.• I promise to find one thingin life that makes mesmile and laugh.In summary, if <strong>you</strong> followthese y bullet points <strong>you</strong> willincrease <strong>you</strong>r potential forsuccess:• Start small• Expect the inevitable discomfortand anxiety thataccompany change• Don’t make promises withoutpreparing for them• Know what triggerstemptation• Recruit ot<strong>her</strong>s to assistor participate in keepingresolutions• Build in rewards forsuccess• Add helping ot<strong>her</strong>s to <strong>you</strong>rresolutions• Review this list and readot<strong>her</strong> articles about tipsfor New Year’s resolutionsGood luck and happy NewYear.LeslieBeth Wish, Ed.D., is a <strong>not</strong>ed psychologistand social worker, specializingin women, family and relationships. Hernext book project, The No-NonsenseWoman’s Guide to Love, is for womensmart about work and career, but <strong>not</strong>about love. If <strong>you</strong> are interested inparticipating in <strong>her</strong> research for thisbook or learning more about <strong>her</strong>, see<strong>her</strong> website at www.lovevictory.com orcontact <strong>her</strong> at dr.l.b.wish@comcast.net.A ContemporaryCeramics & Art Studio• Paint Your Own Pottery• Make Your Own Pottery• Glass Fusing• Paint Me T-Shirts• Parties/Groups/Events• Tiny Hands Crafts• Commissioned Work• Homeschool Programs• And more...$5 OFFYour Next Purchaseof $25 or more.Mention or present this ad fordiscount. One discount per invoiceper visit. Not valid with any ot<strong>her</strong>offer. Expires 3/31/10.2030 Liberty Road #8,Eldersburg, MD 21784410-552-9797 www.GlazedtoPerfection.comFor Women, To Women, About Women11

Bring on the Angels!By Jaana MyllyluomaAs I write this,the news are fullof excruciatingimages of housesturned to rubbleand stories of human miseryin the aftermath of theearthquake in Haiti. Thedeath toll is reported in staggeringnumbers and the workahead to care for, feed, andhouse those who are alive isunimaginable. Like so manyot<strong>her</strong>s with whom I havespoken, my heart is achingwith a yearning to help, to dosomething concrete, to bring12 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazinesome comfort. But I don’tknow what else to do, so I dowhat I can—I give money toa relief organization and Ipray.In the quiet of mythoughts, I search for somethinghopeful, a glimmerof promise that affirms lifeand goodness in the midst ofchaos and tragedy. And thenI remember angels.When I was a child, Iabsolutely believed in angels.Clothed in white robesand feat<strong>her</strong>ed wings, theysat at my bedside when Iwas afraid in the middle ofthe night. They guarded mysteps as I walked to schoolin the first grade. As anadult, I no longer believed inwinged beings, but came torecognize intuitions and occasionalurgent warnings asangel messages that shouldbe heeded. An angel messagemade me stop my ironingand run down the stairs tofind my active toddler aboutto walk into the abyss of thebasement stairwell. T<strong>her</strong>ewere many similar last-minutesaves when my son waslittle. I didn’t question w<strong>her</strong>ethe instruction came from. Isimply and gratefully obeyed.Every night I tucked in myson with “Angels are guardingover <strong>you</strong>.”Then an incident happenedthat changed my concept ofangels to include the possibilitythat an angel messagecould be an angel messenger.My family was drivingon Interstate 95 to attend a65th birthday party of a dearfriend. We were decked out inour summer finery despite atorrential rain that sent catsand dogs into hiding. I loveddriving our Peugeot stationwagon, so my husband satin the back with our 5-yearold son and practiced hismandolin for the musical giftwe were planning to give.He <strong>not</strong>iced an unusual noisecoming from the rear tireand asked me to pull over.Returning from the downpourhe reported that oneof the back wheels was heldon by only one bolt. Clearly,the shop that had recentlychanged our tires lackedquality control.Ducking back into the rainwith an umbrella, my husbandsearched the back gatefor the magical wrench thatwould allow taking one boltfrom each of the ot<strong>her</strong> wheelsand secure the wobbly one.However, it was now<strong>her</strong>e tobe found.Back inside, the air grewheated as we realized thatthe wrench had been seenlast in the hands of our sonback at grandma’s house inNew Jersey. Someone had tobe blamed and everyone wasgiven a fair share.I found a white piece ofpaper and hung it from thedriver side window in a feebleeffort to flag down help. Thiswas in the days before cellphones. Rain was relent-

less and trucks were speedingpast us oblivious to ourdistress. The paper stuckto the window and turnedinto mush. I was furious atthe tire merchant, at myhusband, at my son, at thetrucks, at the rain, and atmyself. And I was <strong>not</strong> quietabout it.My husband threw at me alittle booklet he found on theback seat floor, and yelled,“Read this!” It was one ofthose free pamphlets somereligious group had tuckedunder the windshield wiperand we had promptly thrownon the car floor. The titlepromised “Help from Above”and inside the text containedBible verses appropriate forthe occasion. I curtailed mytongue and began to read. “Iwill lift up mine eyes untothe hills, whence cometh myhelp.” (Psalm 121)I lifted up my eyes andthrough the foggy windshieldsaw a car backing slowlytoward us on the shoulderuntil it stopped right in frontof our car. The car was awhite Dodge. My husbandjumped out and I watchedhim greet the driver withan explanation of our need.The man opened his trunkand reached in for a wrench.He refused the cover of anumbrella.Now, I have to explain thatour car was French and usedmetric sized bolts, whichrequire a metric lug wrench.The chance of a Dodgewrench fitting a Peugeot boltis less than snow flurries inJuly in Baltimore.My husband later exclaimedthat the trunk wasfilled with wrenches of allsizes. The man simply puthis hand in and pulled out awrench that was the perfectfit. In a manner of minuteshe swiftly exchanged theneeded bolts from the donorwheels onto the troubled one.He also tightened all the restof the bolts to ensure our safepassage.Then he left as quickly ashe had arrived. We barelyhad a chance to thank him.The rain had stopped.The mood was reverent asmy husband climbed backinto the car. Uncharacteristicallyquietly he asked if I<strong>not</strong>iced what the man waswearing. Yes, I had seen hehad on white jeans and awhite shirt. But, my husbandcontinued, did <strong>you</strong> see hisfeet? On his feet were whitetennis shoes, without a spotof dirt.I have since read accountsof ot<strong>her</strong>s who encounteredin their plight a messengerof help. Our angel had manycharacteristics in commonwith them. They appear fromGraphic Design &Desktop Publishing301-814-8852info@MDGraphics.comwww.MDGraphics.comnow<strong>her</strong>e, they speak little,they’re unbot<strong>her</strong>ed by theweat<strong>her</strong>, they leave quicklyand they don’t expect athank <strong>you</strong>.Was our Good Samaritanan angel or just an unselfishand kind person? Onething is certain—whoever hewas, he secured more thanjust the bolts on our wheel.He affirmed my trust in theever present help that comesin one form or a<strong>not</strong><strong>her</strong> justwhen we need it the most.And this is my simple,heartfelt prayer for Haiti.Bring on the angels!Jaana Myllyluoma, Ph.D, CPCC is a“whole woman” coach and empowers<strong>her</strong> clients to recognize and use all oftheir resources—physical, mental andspiritual—in service of their goals andcommitments. Contact Jaana for a freecoaching session during the monthsof February and March, by email atjaanamy@comcast.net or by calling410-292-8788. Logos,Corporate ID,& Stationery Brochures, Ads,Posters, Signs, &Ot<strong>her</strong> MarketingCollateral Newsletters,Magazines,Annual Reports,Books, & Ot<strong>her</strong>Publications Web/ComputerGraphicsFor Women, To Women, About Women13

30 Years of theMaryland Women’sHistory ProjectBy Jill Moss GreenbergJill MossGreenbergMarch 2010 willmark the 30thanniversary ofthe MarylandWomen’s HistoryProject,developedthrough acollaborationbetween theMarylandCommissionfor Womenand theMarylandState Departmentof Education.Fromits inception, the MarylandWomen’s History Projectwas dedicated to honor andcelebrate the contributions ofMaryland women and girlsof diverse backgrounds andregions—both renowned andpreviously unknown.Prior to 1980, t<strong>her</strong>e wereno official observances ofwomen’s history in Maryland,and most people wereunaware of the many contributionsmade by women andgirls. Like most people, whenI was in school, studyinghistory mostly consisted ofmemorizing the dates of battlesor names of presidents. Itwasn’t until I went to a conferenceabout “Women in theAmerican Revolution” that Ibecame interested in history.For the first time, I learnedabout people like me—andlike <strong>you</strong>.Nationally, the first resolutionto establish a NationalWomen’s History Week wasintroduced through the advocacyof the National Women’sHistory Project, in 1980, butwas defeated in the U.S. Congress.Through a<strong>not</strong><strong>her</strong> bill,sponsored by then MarylandRepresentative Barbara A.Mikulski, the U.S. House ofRepresentatives designatedthe week beginning March8, 1981, as National Women’sHistory Week. (Congresslater expanded the week to awhole month in 1987.)At the same time as thenational efforts, Marylandbegan to establish a MarylandWomen’s History Week.As a member of the MarylandCommission for Womenat the time, I proposed thatthe Commission initiateMaryland Women’s HistoryWeek. We invited theMaryland State Departmentof Education to join with usand, to<strong>get</strong><strong>her</strong>, with a committeeof educators, membersof Maryland’s local Commissionsfor Women, and ot<strong>her</strong>organizations, we begancreating and disseminatingmaterials to publicize theweek throughout Maryland.Maryland Women’s HistoryWeek and then month werealso proclaimed each year bythe Governor and the MarylandLegislature.Each year since, packetsof materials were developedand distributed to all schools,libraries, local Commissionsfor Women, and ot<strong>her</strong>organizations, throughoutthe state. These packetscontained informationfocused on a specific area ofachievement by Marylandwomen. Themes includedWomen in Historical Eras(1982), Maryland Womenin the Arts (1985, 1998),Maryland Women in Mathematicsand Science (1988,1999), Maryland’s UnsungHeroines (1990), and more.Over the years, the packetswere expanded to includelesson plans, bulletin boarddisplay kits, and suggestedcommunity activities, as wellas compilations of availablespeakers, and organizational,written, and media resources.Linda Shevitz of the MarylandState Department ofEducation coordinated thedevelopment of these packetsand kept track of the tremendousnumber of educationalprograms that resulted inpublic schools, colleges anduniversities, organizationsfor girls and women, and inactive communities.14 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine

In celebrating MarylandWomen’s History, we stroveto be inclusive of the greatdiversity among Marylandwomen. We <strong>not</strong> only wantedto highlight renowned Marylandwomen, such as HarrietTubman, Rachel Carson, andot<strong>her</strong>s, but also wanted toinclude the “unsung <strong>her</strong>oines”in our families, communitiesand places of work andworship.In 2003, the MarylandWomen’s History Projectdeveloped the “MarylandWomen’s Heritage Trail.” Inconjunction with local historicalassociations and commissionsfor women, more than150 Maryland sites wereidentified w<strong>her</strong>e women hadmade unique contributions,some in every county and inBaltimore City. (More informationabout the “MarylandWomen’s Heritage Trail” isavailable on our Website atwww.MDWomensHeritage-Center.org/<strong>her</strong>itage-trail.)Creating this trail was atremendous achievement andthe interest and excitement itcreated made it clear that weneeded an actual site w<strong>her</strong>eMarylanders, <strong>you</strong>ng and old,could come to learn, contributeand honor the contributionsof Maryland’s womenand girls. In addition, it wasimportant to provide a homefor the Maryland Women’sHall of Fame, which wasestablished by the WomenLegislators of Maryland withthe Maryland Commissionfor Women in 1985. Withsupport from the ongoinggroups and from the FirstLady of Maryland, a committeewas created to worktoward the existence of theMaryland Women’s HeritageCenter—with all of its components,a national first.Maryland was the firststate in the country to acknowledgewomen of diversegroups and ages.It is only fitting that theCenter will be opening itsinitial temporary home locatedin Baltimore City thisMarch—30 years since thefounding of the MarylandWomen’s History Project.For more information orto become involved in supportingthe creation of theMaryland Women’s HeritageCenter, visit our Website atwww.MDWomensHeritage-Center.org, call 410-767-0675,or e-mail mwhcjill@comcast.net.New Year 2010What if …What if <strong>you</strong> began the yearwith a clean slate?Here’s a true story with amessage to ponder.When the middle-agedwoman awoke from the coma,<strong>her</strong> memory had been wipedclean. She did <strong>not</strong> know <strong>her</strong>husband or children, parentsor childhood. Everything shelearned about <strong>her</strong> past wasbased on stories told by familyand former friends. Imaginewhat this would be like,to be totally amnesiac.Previous slights andangers, fears and embarrassments,all forgotten.She had to discover <strong>her</strong>personality all over again,which turned out to be somewhatdifferent from the wayshe had always been. Shehad to learn what she likedand didn’t, and how to buildbrand new relationshipswith husband and family,based purely on what washappening in the present.Even addictive eating habitschanged.If <strong>you</strong> were no longer beinglimited and misled by memoriesof past experiences andundermining beliefs, howwould <strong>you</strong>r life change, bedifferent, improve and <strong>get</strong>better?What would happen if <strong>you</strong>began this new year and nextdecade with a fresh startclean slate? How could thisidea improve <strong>you</strong>r well being?May <strong>you</strong> enjoy the peaceand pleasure that comesfrom clearing the decks ofwhat’s old and outdated,living instead as if today isa brand new day to live in abrand new way.Ann McGill, MidWife of Consciousness,is author of Birthing into Beingness,the Beautiful Truth of Who You Are.MidWife@AnnMcGill.com.www.MiraclesMadeEasy.com.703-262-0620.For Women, To Women, About Women15

Self-Control Is ContagiousBy Sam FahmyBefore patting <strong>you</strong>rselfon the back forresisting that cookieor kicking <strong>you</strong>rself for givingin to temptation, lookaround. A new University ofGeorgia study has revealedthat self-control—or the lackt<strong>her</strong>eof—is contagious.In a just-published seriesof studies involving hundredsof volunteers, researc<strong>her</strong>shave found that watching oreven thinking about someonewith good self-control makesot<strong>her</strong>s more likely exertself-control. The researc<strong>her</strong>sfound that the opposite holds,too, so that people with badself-control influence ot<strong>her</strong>snegatively. The effect is sopowerful, in fact, that seeingthe name of someonewith good or bad self-controlflashing on a screen for just10 milliseconds changed thebehavior of volunteers.“The take home messageof this study is that pickingsocial influences that arepositive can improve <strong>you</strong>rself-control,” said lead authorMichelle vanDellen, a visitingassistant professor in theUGA department of psychology.“And by exhibiting selfcontrol,<strong>you</strong>’re helping ot<strong>her</strong>saround <strong>you</strong> do the same.”People tend to mimic thebehavior of those aroundthem, and characteristicssuch as smoking, drug useand obesity tend to spreadthrough social networks. ButvanDellen’s study is thoughtto be the first to show that16 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazineself-control is contagiousacross behaviors. That meansthat thinking about someonewho exercises self-controlby regularly exercising, forexample, can make <strong>you</strong>rmore likely to stick with <strong>you</strong>rfinancial goals, career goalsor anything else that takesself-control on <strong>you</strong>r part.VanDellen’s findings,which are published in theearly online edition of thejournal Personality andSocial Psychology Bulletin,are the result of five separatestudies conducted overtwo years with study coauthorRick Hoyle at DukeUniversity.In the first study, the researc<strong>her</strong>srandomly assigned36 volunteers to think abouta friend with eit<strong>her</strong> good orbad self-control. Those thatthought about a friend withgood self-control persistedlonger on a handgrip taskcommonly used to measureself-control, while the oppositeheld true for those whowere asked to think about afriend with bad self-control.In the second study, 71volunteers watched ot<strong>her</strong>sexert self-control by choosinga carrot from a plate in frontof them instead of a cookiefrom a nearby plate, whileot<strong>her</strong>s watched people eat thecookies instead of the carrots.The volunteers had nointeraction with the tastersot<strong>her</strong> than watching them,yet their performance wasaltered on a later test of selfcontroldepending on whothey were randomly assignedto watch.In the third study, 42volunteers were randomlyassigned to list friends withboth good and bad self-control.As they were completinga computerized test designedto measure self-control, thecomputer screen would flashthe names for 10 milliseconds—toofast to be read butenough to subliminally bringthe names to mind. Thosewho were primed with thename of a friend with goodself-control did better, whilethose primed with friendswith bad self-control didworse.In a fourth study, van-Dellen randomly assigned112 volunteers to write abouta friend with good self-control,bad self-control or—for acontrol group—a friend whois moderately extroverted.On a later test of self-control,those who wrote aboutfriends with good self-controldid the best, while those whowrote about friends with badself-control did the worst.The control group, those whowrote about a moderatelyextroverted friend, scored betweenthe ot<strong>her</strong> two groups.In the fifth study of 117volunteers, the researc<strong>her</strong>sfound that those who wererandomly assigned to writeabout friends with good selfcontrolwere faster than theContinued on Page 29.

If so, SNBL Clinical Pharmacology Center in downtown Baltimore is conductinga clinical research study of an investigational drug.Qualified Participants Must:• Be 45-75 years old• Be post menopausal for at least 1 yearThis study includes a screening visit, a 9 day / 8 night in-patient visit and 1 outpatient visit.Qualified participants may receive up to $2080.00 in compensation for their time, travel and study related care.Contact our recruiting department at:410-706-8833 or 866-706-8833or email: recruiter@snbl-cpc.comFor Women, To Women, About Women17

Explosive Retail Health ClinicGrowth ExpectedMore Patients Seeking Affordable After-HoursCare, According to NCPA ScholarThe number of walk-inclinics is expected tonearly triple in thenext four years inresponse to increasedpatient demand, accordingto a new report from theNational Center for PolicyAnalysis (NCPA).“These retail health careclinics offer evening andweekend care solutionsat a fraction of the cost ofemergency rooms and oftencharge less than a physicianoffice visit,” said NCPASenior Fellow Devon Herrick.He points that emergencyroom care is amongthe most expensive type ofpatient care, and said “of the119 million annual visits tohospital ERs, 55% are fornon-emergencies.”Herrick said that thecurrent 1,100 to 1,200 walkinclinics are expected toincrease to 3,200 by 2014.Patients and FamilyMembers Needed forSchizophrenia and BipolarDisorder ResearchIf <strong>you</strong> are between ages 15-65, diagnosed withSchizophrenia, Schizoaffective Disorder orBipolar Disorder with Psychosis, <strong>you</strong> and <strong>you</strong>rfamily members may be eligible to participatein a research study aiming to identify genes thatare related to the cause of these illnesses.Please call Beth Vayshenker at(410)-402-6822 or email us atSRD_Recruitment@mprc.umaryland.edu.Monetary compensation provided.Transportation available if needed.“They are well-suited topatients wanting affordable,convenient care, especiallyafter-hours and on weekends,”he said. “And, theseclinics are an easy option forsome people without coverageor a primary care physicianto <strong>get</strong> routine medicalcare without cost surprises.The prices are competitiveand posted.”Urgent care clinics area<strong>not</strong><strong>her</strong> emergency room alternativefor more serious injuriesand illness, requiringstitches, x-rays or more thana nurse practitioner’s care.Also increasing in numbers,urgent care centers are usuallystand-alone operations.“Use of health informationtechnology has helped clinicsstreamline operations andcosts,” said Herrick. ‘Theseoperations could serve asmodels for hospitals and physicians’offices, which havebeen slower to switch over toelectronic medical records.”The NCPA is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit,nonpartisan public policy researchorganization headquartered in Dallaswith offices in Washington, D.C. TheNCPA depends solely on the contributionsof individuals, corporations andfoundations that advocate private sectorsolutions to public policy problems. Allcontributions are tax-deductible, andthe NCPA accepts no governmentgrants or contracts18 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine

“Delicious Home-Made Cakes”AuntKat<strong>her</strong>ine’sKitchen, Inc.Tynia Canada, PresidentTry OurScrumptiousFlavors:LemonCoconut,StrawberryLayer,Butter Pound,& More...••••Birthdays, Baby Showers, and Special Occasions410-564-7545For Women, To Women, About Women

Constellations Plus—Healing to WholenessStories - ExamplesBert Hellinger tellsthis story in one ofhis books. The clientdiscovered she had beensignificantly, unconsciously,impacted by <strong>her</strong> mot<strong>her</strong>’shorrific childhood experience—witnessing<strong>her</strong> fat<strong>her</strong>drowning.The day after the healingresolution occurred, theMot<strong>her</strong> called with very goodnews. Totally unaware <strong>her</strong>daughter had just attendeda Constellation weekend,<strong>her</strong>e’s the gist of what Iimagine was said.“Remember how, on theanniversary of my Fat<strong>her</strong>’sdeath, I always felt impelledto return to the same spot onthe bridge? When I got t<strong>her</strong>ethis year, this time I couldn’tstay. I felt just as compelledto walk to the opposite endof the bridge, and when Igot t<strong>her</strong>e I felt ever so muchlighter, like a huge burdenhad been lifted.”Constellations can have apowerful impact on familymembers who are <strong>not</strong> present,or even aware a healingresolution has been initiatedwithin the family system.Isn’t that marvelous!?* * * * *20 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women MagazineThe issue I chose to workon was achieving my potential.For many years I hadexperienced the sensation ofbeing held back, as if someonehad a firm grip on theback of my shirt and wouldyank me backwards as soonas I took half a step forward.The Constellation immediatelysurfaced that myMot<strong>her</strong> was extremely upset,<strong>her</strong> attention stuck on somepast event. I remembered <strong>her</strong>telling me how traumaticallyupsetting <strong>her</strong> honeymoonwas. A foretelling of whatto expect the rest of <strong>her</strong> life.The Constellation processconfirmed this was the reasonmy Mot<strong>her</strong> was unableto be the loving, supportiveMom she really wanted tobe. As we came to<strong>get</strong><strong>her</strong> inhealing resolution, I felt alifting, a release, that I wasno longer being held back.Life-long patterns canchange quite dramaticallyonce initiating events arehealed. It’s such a relief todiscover it was <strong>not</strong> <strong>you</strong>, <strong>you</strong>really were being impelled bysubconscious conditions. Howfortunate the person who isso freed!* * * * *Now that my Mot<strong>her</strong> and Ihad connected in loving resolution,I expected momentumto begin building immediately.That didn’t happen. Twoweeks later I was still stuck!So I did a second Constellation,focusing on my Fat<strong>her</strong>.This is how I learned why becomingfree of my Mot<strong>her</strong>’sissue had <strong>not</strong> been enough tofree me fully.“It was <strong>not</strong> safe for <strong>you</strong>to move forward, Ann,” themessage said. All havocwould have broken loose if<strong>you</strong>r creativity had been letfly before <strong>you</strong> were securelygrounded. You need the firmfoundation <strong>you</strong>r Fat<strong>her</strong> canprovide. He’s a very solid,steadfast man.” I felt myDad’s strength begin to flowinto me, supporting, stabilizingand grounding.Ever since that session, Ihave felt myself growing internallystronger. Now, whenI start to bog down, I can <strong>get</strong>myself going again. Tasksare <strong>get</strong>ting done with fewerinterruptions, my writing isflowing with greater ease.Delightful synchronisticevents are occurring withincreasing frequency. Free atlast, free at last, how gratefulI am for Constellations!Is this the kind of freeingexperience <strong>you</strong> choose to gift<strong>you</strong>rself?Will we see <strong>you</strong> at our nextConstellations Plus–Healingto Wholeness?To save <strong>you</strong>r place Jan.31st 2010 call 703-262-0620or email MidWife@AnnMc-Gill.com. Do <strong>you</strong> wish to bethe focus of a Constellationas well as Participant?

For Women, To Women, About Women21

12 Touchstones toS I M P L I F Y L I F EBy Rick D. Niece, Ph.D.Ido <strong>not</strong> remember exactly when life got complicated. Maybe it was after college and thefirst real job, car payments, marriage, mortgage, and trying to share equal time withparents and in-laws geographically separated. Maybe life’s complexities are the result oftoo much technology, too much information, too much invasiveness, and too little privatetime. I am <strong>not</strong> certain how life got so complicated, but I am able to find solace in the wordsof Eleanor Roosevelt: “A little simplification would be the first step toward rational living.”As a university President, I have clever escape routes that help me fend off life’s complexities.Sometimes, in scarce moments of silent peacefulness, I drift back to bicycle rides alongthe scenic, unnamed county roads that surrounded my small hometown. I daydream myselfto the welcoming downhill slopes, coasting effortlessly while using no hands. The traffic isminimal, the country air maximal, and I float carefree. Renewed like the force of a powernap, I come back to reality revitalized.I have ot<strong>her</strong> equally effective escape routes to retrieve touchstones of sane simplicity inthis world of complexity. They can work for <strong>you</strong> as well.See the world through a child’s eyes. Try1 5to rediscover the initial excitement ofnow routine occurrences. Watch like achild who is experiencing them for the firsttime. Airplane trips, frequent events forme, pass quickly when I relive, through the6eyes of a child, the magic of close-up clouds,streams of miniature vehicles, and housesrowed to<strong>get</strong><strong>her</strong> like children’s blocks.2Find a former teac<strong>her</strong>.7Telephone thatteac<strong>her</strong> and reminisce. I talk to myfifth grade teac<strong>her</strong>, Mrs. Curl, severaltimes a year. I do most of the listening, andthat is good for both of us. I enjoy beingMemorize a poem. When stressed Rickie again.3and unable to fall asleep, repeatYield to the allure of the local, the everyday,the ordinary. Discover what thethe poem like a mantra instead ofcounting sheep. Robert Frost’s “Stoppinglocal has to offer. 8We do <strong>not</strong> have toby Woods on a Snowy Evening,” and A.E.travel distant lands for adventure. Too oftenHousman’s, “When I Was One-And-Twenty”lifetimes are spent trekking through layerswork for me.of complexity in a search for simplicity, aPlay classical music. Listen to more simplicity that is already patiently waiting tothan just the 4well-known masterpieces. be discovered. Pots of gold sit, barely hidden,Include selections <strong>you</strong> are <strong>not</strong> familiarwith. The early works of composers likeat our feet. Don’t make them trip <strong>you</strong>.Mozart, Beethoven, Dvorak, Brahms, Tchaikovsky,and Rachmaninoff will delight <strong>you</strong>.Isolate the positive. Separate the positivefrom the swirling frenzy of negativitythat surrounds us. Find the kernelswithin the chaff. Treasure what <strong>you</strong> haveinstead of lamenting for what <strong>you</strong> do <strong>not</strong>. Letjust enough be enough.22 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women MagazineLook back for comfort. T<strong>her</strong>e is muchgratification in remembering what was.Recalling the old can be as fulfilling asexploring the new. The past has its place.Imagine <strong>you</strong>r favorite memory and writeabout it. Read <strong>you</strong>r memory after a badday. Re-read it again after the next badday. Write about a<strong>not</strong><strong>her</strong> treasured memory.Capture more good memories than <strong>you</strong> havebad days.

910Leave work at work. We need to rechargeat home with family before charginginto tomorrow. Prioritize the real priorities.Occasionally, try to leave the officeearly. Our offices can survive without us.Involve <strong>you</strong>rself in community service.Helping ot<strong>her</strong>s is a simple pleasure.Deliver meals on wheels, volunteer for achurch, school, or hospital, or become a BigBrot<strong>her</strong>/Big Sister. Complexities disappearwhen we serve ot<strong>her</strong>s.<strong>Focus</strong> on the11satisfiers. Compile a list ofthe things that satisfy <strong>you</strong>, that make<strong>you</strong> happy. Remember why they make<strong>you</strong> happy. Work to remove the often self-imposedroadblocks to satisfaction.Enjoy a quiet evening. Steep a pot of hottea, <strong>get</strong> into <strong>you</strong>r pajamas by 7:30 p.m.,and recline into an easy chair—<strong>not</strong>elevision, no newspaper, no cell phone. Letthe softness of a comfortable cat fill <strong>you</strong>r lap.12Close <strong>you</strong>r eyes and listen to the contentedpurring. The murmuring rhythms echothrough <strong>you</strong>. Enjoy simplicity in its purestform.Simplify life. It really is <strong>not</strong> all that complicated.Rick D. Niece, Ph.D., author of The Side-Yard Super<strong>her</strong>o, currently serves as President for the University of the Ozarks inClarksville, Arkansas. Along with his wife, S<strong>her</strong>ée, he works to provide intellectual and cultural enrichment for the 675 studentsat the University, preparing them for graduate school and professional employment success while establishing lifelongvalues. For more information, please visit www.RickNiece.com.For Women, To Women, About Women23

Dial Down the Stress in 2010Meditation Expert Sarah McLeanOffers 5 Ways to Diminish Stress in the New YearBecome More Self-AwareSomehow we make thiscomplicated. But it’s simple.How do <strong>you</strong> feel right now?When faced with a choice,pay attention to <strong>you</strong>rself and<strong>not</strong>ice <strong>you</strong>r body’s signalsof comfort and discomfort.Discover how to live withintegrity. Say “no” when <strong>you</strong>mean no to things/people/events that are stressful. Andsay “yes” when <strong>you</strong> meanyes. T<strong>her</strong>e is no need to manipulate<strong>you</strong>rself. A simplequestion I have my studentsask themselves is, “Is it ayum or a yuck for me?” Movetoward the yums and awayfrom the yucks.Surround Yourself In SilencePay attention to whatpeople/noise/smells <strong>you</strong> havein <strong>you</strong>r environment. T<strong>her</strong>eare simple changes <strong>you</strong> canmake to create a more pleasingspace. Take time forsilence, turn off the TV, takethe earphones out, and occasionallylet the phone go tovoice mail so <strong>you</strong> can finish atask. Most importantly, for afew minutes every day moveaway from the electronicworld and give <strong>you</strong>rself timeout in nature. Believe it or<strong>not</strong>, disconnecting fromthe world of timelines andconnection can help <strong>you</strong> tobecome more connected to<strong>you</strong>rself and <strong>you</strong>r world.Accentuate the PositiveWhatever <strong>you</strong> put <strong>you</strong>rattention on grows. What24 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazinedo <strong>you</strong> spend time thinkingabout or complaining about?Over time, our behaviorscreate a habit of mind, sowhen <strong>you</strong> remember to focuson what <strong>you</strong> like and whatmakes <strong>you</strong> feel good, <strong>you</strong>’llincrease <strong>you</strong>r experience ofpleasure. It’s <strong>not</strong> just positivethinking; it’s about putting<strong>you</strong>r attention on the<strong>her</strong>e and now and what <strong>you</strong>like about it. T<strong>her</strong>e are alsosimple gratitude practicescan also help <strong>you</strong> feel happierand relieve stress.Adjust Your Sleepingand Eating PatternsDo <strong>you</strong> eat while <strong>you</strong> arestanding up or on the phone?Or late at night when <strong>you</strong>could be sleeping? Do <strong>you</strong>look down and <strong>you</strong>r food isgone, but <strong>you</strong> don’t remembereating it? When <strong>you</strong>follow the natural rhythms ofnature, take meals when thedigestion is strongest and eatwith full awareness, <strong>you</strong>’lleat less, and digest better.Do <strong>you</strong> believe the saying,“early to bed, early to rise”?One way the mind and bodyrejuvenates is through sleep.Learn why it’s a priority to<strong>get</strong> to bed early to let <strong>you</strong>rbody’s rejuvenation systemdo its job.Learn To MeditateYes, <strong>you</strong> can do it. No <strong>you</strong>don’t have to join a cult,change <strong>you</strong>r religion, becomeve<strong>get</strong>arian or go to India.Meditation is easy if <strong>you</strong> aretaught right. Instead of tryingtoo hard, <strong>you</strong> can learnhow a relaxing silent meditationwill help <strong>you</strong> achievethe deep rest that sleep can.A simple silent meditationpractice can change <strong>you</strong>rwhole day. Researc<strong>her</strong>s provemeditation improves sleeppatterns even when <strong>you</strong> do itin the morning.Once thought of as anesoteric or religious pursuit,meditation is going mainstream.A government surveyin 2007 found that about 1out of 11 Americans, morethan 20 million people, meditatedin the past year. And agrowing number of medicalcenters are teaching meditationto patients for the managementof stress.“As Americans becomemore attached to laptops,iPhones, Blackberries andot<strong>her</strong> digital devices, we havea greater need to unplug andto tap into our inner silence,”says Sarah McLean, directorof the Sedona MeditationTraining Company. “Meditationis the perfect antidoteto stress. Research showsthat it lowers blood pressure,increases blood flow anddecreases heart rate. It alsodecreases our stress hormoneand reduces insomnia.”Sarah McLean is known as “the face ofmainstream meditation” and has beenteaching mind-body health for 16 years.She is an expert on bringing the ancientpractice of meditation to a modernworld. For more information, visit www.sedonameditation.com.

Concerned SinglesBy Rodelinde AlbrechtWhat I DoIt’s been my privilege andmy pleasure for the pasttwenty-five years to bringto<strong>get</strong><strong>her</strong> like-minded peoplewho are seeking a deeply satisfyinglove connection. ConcernedSingles is the premiervirtual meeting place foraware, progressive, sociallyconscious singles across thecountry.How I Got StartedIn 1984, dating serviceswere just beginning to beaccepted as a way of makingromantic connections. AllanBlack, the significant man inmy life at the time, was veryprogressive politically andsocially.It was his inspirationto create an introductionservice designed to servepeople who were interestedin matters beyond a sharedfondness for, say, tennis andChinese food. As director, hetook care of the business side,including advertising andpublicity. As an experiencedpublishing professional, Iwas responsible for thedesign and production of ourlogo and all our print materials.When Allan died in 1988,I took on the directorship aswell.What I OfferThe profiles of all ourmembers are posted on ourwebsite. Although access tothe site is open to anyone,only members may respondto the listings. To preserveconfidentiality, the first contactbetween individuals issent via Concerned Singles;subsequent correspondenceflows directly between thetwo individuals.For those requesting it,the listings are also availableby mail in the form ofa quarterly newsletter, andmembers may correspondby realmail if they choose.Personal service is key: I’mavailable by phone to membersand potential membersfor consultation andencouragement.What Makes Me GreenI see myself as a sort ofgardener, planting the seedswhose crop will be harvestedby ot<strong>her</strong>s and cooked up intosoul-nourishing relationships.Green living recognizes thatspeed and size are no guaranteeof quality; hence theemphasis on slow food andon small farming.At Concerned Singles weoffer the slow food and smallfarming of love. What’s more,the couples who connectthrough Concerned Singlestend to create a kind of synergythat allows them to accomplishthings they mightnever have accomplished bythemselves.How To Find MeOn the web at concernedsingles.com,introductions@concernedsingles.com and byphone at 413-243-4350.“Yes, t<strong>her</strong>e really is a RodelindeYes, t<strong>her</strong>e really is somebody t<strong>her</strong>eShe will help <strong>you</strong> write <strong>you</strong>r self-descriptionYes, t<strong>her</strong>e really is someone who cares . . .She is sending letters in the mailShe’s encouraging a deeper lookShe is sending love in all directionsPicking up the phone was all it took . . .”From Concerned Singles Song © 2009 JoAnne SpiesSo, why <strong>not</strong>pick up the phoneand call413-243-4350for informationand encouragementfrom Rodelindecelebrating 25 yearsof helping environmentallyand socially aware singles of all agesto find each ot<strong>her</strong>and create meaningful relationshipsconcernedsingles.com413-243-4350For Women, To Women, About Women25

Legislative LookHot ListState DelegateLiz BoboThe Maryland Leagueof Conservation Voters ispleased to present the “HotList”—a detailedlist ofenvironmentallegislationmovingthrough theMD GeneralAssembly.The environmentalcommunity’stop prioritiesare:üHB TBD: Protecting theGreen Infrastructure Bud<strong>get</strong>We must oppose cuts toProgram Open Space, theChesapeake Bay Trust Fund,the Regional GreenhouseGas Initiative Programs,the Heritage Structure TaxCredit (Historic Tax Credit)and protect funding forour Environment, NaturalResources, Agriculture, andPlanning agencies.üHB TBD: SmarterTransportation Choicesfor MarylandSponsors:Delegates Lafferty,SimmonsIn a time of scarce transportationdollars, we needto make sure we are investingstate funds wisely. Thispackage of bills will establishsmart growth criteriafor funding transportationprojects to make it easy for26 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazinethe state to choose proposalsthat ensure our transportationand land usedecisions work to<strong>get</strong><strong>her</strong> toprovide more travel choicesto Maryland citizens; reduceenvironmental damage fromtransportation projects; andimprove access to jobs.One bill will help measureregional transportationproblems and allow the stateto comment on proposals ofregional impact. A<strong>not</strong><strong>her</strong> billwill establish accountabilitywith a system for local governmentsto report how theyare spending transportationfunding they <strong>get</strong> from thestate. A final bill will makethe roads safer for bicycling.üHB TBD: WatershedProtection & Restoration ActSponsors:Delegates Hucker, CardinIn order to restore thehealth of the ChesapeakeBay Watershed, each city andcounty throughout the regionneeds funding to invest inits community to reduce thepolluted runoff poisoningour waterways. This legislationwill give these localjurisdictions a dedicatedfunding source by assessinga surcharge on impervioussurfaces to clean up theirrivers and the Bay, creategreen jobs, and leverageadditional dollars from thestate and federal governmentfor watershed protection andrestoration.üHB TBD: ComprehensiveEnergy Planning MarylandLCV Priority SUPPORTSponsor: Delegate MannoRequires the Public ServiceCommission to overseethe creation of a state energyplan that is consistent withall state environmental laws.The PSC would then reviewproposals from energy companieswith respect to thestate plan and environmentallaws.In addition to these fourpriority issues, we will alsowork on a number of ot<strong>her</strong>bills this session. If <strong>you</strong> havebills that <strong>you</strong> would like us toconsider for the “Hot List” orsubmit testimony on, pleasecontact Jen Brock-Cancellieriat jbrock@mdlcv.org or 410-280-9855 x 202.Up and Coming BillsüHB 33: Child CareArticles & Toys ContainingBisphenol-ASponsor:Delegate HubbardProhibits the manufacture,sale, or distribution of toys orchild care articles containingBisphenol-A (BPA).üHB TBD:Building Energy DisclosureRequires that all governmentand commercial buildingowners disclose energyuse for the building.

üHB TBD: Fertilizer &Pesticide ReportingMandates tracking andmapping of fertilizer andpesticide use.üHB TBD:Incinerator RegulationEstablishes criteria for thebuilding, re-licensing, or repermittingof any incineratoror waste-to-energy facility.üHB TBD:Keep Farmers FarmingSponsor: Delegate KullenAlleviates the estate taxburden for farmers eit<strong>her</strong>through full relief of the taxfor farms that stay in farmingor relief for farms thatare put into preservationeasement.üHB TBD:Clean Energy LoansGives cities and municipalitiesthe ability to loancitizens money for solar orefficiency projects at very lowinterest rates, resulting inmore access for homeowners.üHB TBD:Heritage Tax CreditReauthorizes the historictax credit.üHB TBD:Keep Coal AshOut of Our WaterProhibits certain uses ofcoal ash and adds stricterrequirements to preventtoxic dust from blowing inthe wind.For more than 30 years, the MarylandLeague of Conservation Voters has beenthe independent political voice for theenvironment in our state. Maryland LCVis dedicated to making environmentalprotection and restoration a top priorityfor Maryland’s elected officials, appointedleaders, candidates and voters.The Maryland League of ConservationVoters advocates for sound conservationpolicies, works to <strong>get</strong> pro-environmentcandidates elected, and holdselected officials accountable for theirvotes and actions. Visit www.mdlcv.orgfor more information.For Women, To Women, About Women27

Open Talk on Ovarian CancerBy Jamie LoberIt is important to understandhow the reproductivesystem works. “Whena woman ovulates everymonth t<strong>her</strong>e is actual physicaldisruption of the ovarybecause <strong>you</strong> have to makean egg. When that happens,the body has to healover the physical hole in theovary and during this healingprocess, a carcinogen canenter. You can have a mutationthat turns into what wecall a malignant transformationor cancerous formation,”explains Dr. DwightIm, obstetrician/gynecologistand director for the gynecologiconcology center atMercy Hospital in Baltimore.Though t<strong>her</strong>e are a few typesof ovarian cancer, epithelialis the most common whichoccurs when cancer strikesthe cells that cover the surfaceof the ovaries.The cause of ovarian canceris unknown but t<strong>her</strong>e aresome speculations. “Somepeople think it may be anagent from the outside worldsuch as talcum powder orsome type of infection,” saysIm. T<strong>her</strong>e are a few tricks forprevention. “Anything thatsuppresses ovulation wouldbe a protective factor whichincludes birth control pills,pregnancy and having children,”tells Im. An annualgynecologic exam is recommended.Remember that<strong>you</strong> should be evaluated if<strong>you</strong> <strong>not</strong>ice any changes. “Beaware of <strong>you</strong>r body,” emphasizesGeorgi Morales of OvarianCancer National Alliance.Most of the time, cysts felt onthe ovaries during a pelvicexam are benign and <strong>not</strong>cancerous but they should<strong>not</strong> be ignored.On September 11, 2009,the OVA1 blood test was approvedby the Food and DrugAdministration. This allowsgynecologists to determinewhet<strong>her</strong> a pelvic mass islikely to become malignantor turn into ovarian cancer.The test was designed by amolecular diagnostics companycalled Vermillion, Inc.and is exclusively availablethrough Quest Diagnostics,Inc. laboratories.Symptoms tend to besubtle which is why seventyfivepercent of cases are <strong>not</strong>detected until they are in theadvanced stages. “Womenmay have vague abdominalbloating, upset stomach,constipation or ot<strong>her</strong> mildsymptoms that can be associatedwith ot<strong>her</strong> things.That is why ovarian canceris referred to as a silentkiller,” says Dr. Sarah Temkin,obstetrician/gynecologistat University of MarylandMarlene and Stewart GreenbaumCancer Center in Baltimore.Ot<strong>her</strong> warning signsinclude increased urination,tiredness, abnormal vaginalbleeding or pelvic pain orpressure. Sometimes ovariancancer may be asymptomatic.Women who are consideredlikely to <strong>get</strong> ovarian cancermay want to be proactive.“Hig<strong>her</strong> risk women with afamily history of ovarian orbreast cancer or the BRCAmutation should be screenedto see if they are candidatesfor prophylactic removal oftheir ovaries in order to combatovarian cancer and reducethe risk,” says Temkin.If <strong>you</strong> are diagnosed withovarian cancer, it is advisedto see a specialist. “When<strong>you</strong> see a gynecologic oncologistor surgical oncologist,<strong>you</strong>r outcomes are generallybetter,” says Temkin. Youshould also keep good <strong>not</strong>es.“You may want to have asymptom diary which isblessed by a number of medicalprofessionals. It helpswomen track and documenttheir symptoms on a dailybasis so they have somethingto show their doctor,” saysMorales. It is normal to haveroutine blood tests to monitorthe CA125 levels.Strides have been madein treatment. “A study ledby John Hopkins KimmelCancer Center suggests anew treatment standard foradvanced disease. A fiftyyear-old method for deliveringchemot<strong>her</strong>apy directlyinto the abdomen is makinga comeback as investigatorshave found that it increasessurvival by more than ayear in some women withadvanced ovarian cancer,”tells Vanessa Wasta, communicationsdirector at JohnHopkins. Avastin is a recent28 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine

choice. “It is a chemot<strong>her</strong>apy drug that isshowing promising clinical trials,” describesTemkin.Advances are in progress. “Instead of usingchemot<strong>her</strong>apy for treatment, they areusing biologics looking for specific mutationsbut we are still many years away from comingup with good screening tests, detectiontechnology and treatment process,” expressesIm. Gynecologists are hoping to offeran effective screening method in the future.“T<strong>her</strong>e has been a lot of interest in using theCA125 blood test combined with a transvaginalultrasound as well as tar<strong>get</strong>ed t<strong>her</strong>apies,”says Temkin.The 110th congress has pending legislationtitled Ovarian Cancer Biomarker Act.The National Cancer Institute is supportingthis quest to find biomarkers for ovariancancer because it would assist in earlydetection when the cancer is in a morecurable state. It is important to remain intune to <strong>you</strong>r body and hold a positive outlook.“Women should know t<strong>her</strong>e is hope and justbecause <strong>you</strong> are diagnosed with this does <strong>not</strong>mean it is the end of the road,” says Morales.Self-Control Is Contagious(Continued from page 16.)ot<strong>her</strong> groups at identifying words relatedto self-control, such as achieve, disciplineand effort. VanDellen said this findingsuggests that self-control is contagious becausebeing exposed to people with eit<strong>her</strong>good or bad self-control influences how accessiblethoughts about self-control are.VanDellen said the magnitude of theinfluence might be significant enough tobe the difference between eating an extracookie at a party or <strong>not</strong>, or deciding to goto the gym despite a long day at work. Theeffect isn’t so strong that it absolves peopleof accountability for their actions, sheexplained, but it is a nudge toward or awayfrom temptation.“This isn’t an excuse for blaming ot<strong>her</strong>people for our failures,” VanDellen said.“Yes, I’m <strong>get</strong>ting nudged, but it’s <strong>not</strong> likemy friend is taking the cookie and feedingit to me; the decision is ultimately mine.”The research was supported by the NationalInstitute on Drug Abuse. For Women, To Women, About Women29

Students May Not Be Left Out in the ColdState Commission Helping in the Wake ofComputerTraining.edu’s ClosingLocal media first brokethe story that sentshivers down thespines of studentsawaiting commencementof their spring semester ofclasses at ComputerTraining.edua Hunt Valley, MD.based business with classroomsin Towson, Annapolisand 23 ot<strong>her</strong>locationsaround thecountry. The17 year-oldbusiness,specializingin informationtechnologytraining,shut its doorson December31, 2009.A statementon thecompany’sWebsite,www.computertraining.edu, datedJanuary 4,2010, reportedits assetswere frozenby BB&T30 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women MagazineAbout BBB | Greater MarylandHeadquartered in Baltimore, BBB | Greater Marylandis a non-profit organization that was establishedin 1922. It serves 18 Maryland counties and BaltimoreCity. In 2008, BBB | Greater Maryland’s Web sitemade more than three million impressions providingfree Reliability Reports on area businesses and charities,marketplace tips, and information on scams. BBBof Greater Maryland is supported by Accredited Businessesthat have passed a comprehensive review, met13 standards of trust, and that agree to uphold thosestandards including commitments to advertise honestly,and to address marketplace disputes quickly, respectfully,and reasonably. For more information pleasecontact BBB |Greater Maryland at 410-347-3990 orvisit www.bbb.org.BBB of Greater MarylandAngie BarnettPresident & CEO410-347-3981BBB of Greater MarylandJody ThomasV.P. Communications410-347-8593Bank, forcing the company toclose their corporate officesand their schools. Prior tothe company’s closing, thebusiness had maintained asatisfactory report with BetterBusiness Bureau.“We are stunned by theloss of this business to ourcommunity,” said Angie Barnett,president/CEO, BetterBusiness Bureau | GreaterMaryland. “Until this suddenturn of events, ComputerTraining.eduhas hada history of providing goodcustomer service and workedwith BBB to resolve any consumercomplaints.”According to ComputerTraining.edu,studentswere told via email that, “Itis with deep sadness andregret that Computertraining.eduannounces it willcease operation and close allof the Computertraining.eduschools, effective immediately.These actions are dueto circumstances beyond thecompany’s control. T<strong>her</strong>e willbe no furt<strong>her</strong> classes held atany of our schools.” Studentswere furt<strong>her</strong> directed to contacttheir local state agencyto request refunds.BBB has verified that studentswho have paid for, but<strong>not</strong> completed their classeswith ComputerTraining.eduregardless ofthe state inwhich theywere enrolled,shouldcontact theMarylandHig<strong>her</strong>EducationCommissionat www.mhec.state.md.usor Mr. LesBennett at410-260-4535or lbennett@mhec.state.md.us.In anemail to BBB,Mr. Bennettacknowledgedthat,“The Stateof Marylandthrough the MarylandHig<strong>her</strong> Education Commissionhas certain studentprotections available to helpin cases such as this, particularlyfor those studentswho were eit<strong>her</strong> attending atthe time the school closed orwere enrolled to attend at afuture date.

For Women, To Women, About Women31

Enjoy Pregnancywithout Foot Pain“Oh my aching feet” is aphrase <strong>you</strong> hear oftenfrom pregnant women.But, are sore feet asymptom they just mustdeal with during pregnancy?According to the AmericanCollege of Foot and AnkleSurgeons (ACFAS) the answeris “no.” T<strong>her</strong>e are manyremedies available to helpalleviate foot pain.According to MarybethCrane, DPM, FACFAS, aDallas-area foot and anklesurgeon, women often experiencefoot pain during pregnancybecause of increasedweight, foot instability andswelling. “In the last fiveyears, I’ve seen an increasein pregnant women with footpain because more womenthan ever before are active,even running marathons,during their pregnancies,”Dr. Crane says. ACFASrecommends the followingguidelines to help reduce footpain during pregnancy.Painful, Swollen Feet—Pregnant women often experiencethrobbing, swollenfeet due to excess fluid buildup (edema) in the feet fromthe weight and position of thebaby. To reduce swelling, putfeet up whenever possible,stretch legs frequently, wearwide comfortable shoes anddon’t cross legs when sitting.Arch Pain—Pain in the arch can bedue to both arch fatigue orover pronation (or the flatteningof the arch). Over pronationoccurs due to extremestress to the ligament (theplantar fascia) that holds upthe arch of the foot. The bestway to prevent arch pain isto stretch daily in the morningand before and after anyexercise, don’t go barefootand wear supportive lowheeledshoes.Foot Cramps—These painful cramps arecaused by increased bloodvolume and high progesteronelevels brought onby pregnancy. To preventcramps, increase circulationby rotating ankles andelevating feet while sitting.If cramps persist, try a walkaround the block and includedaily stretching of the calfmuscles.Ingrown Toenails—Excessive stress fromtightly-fitting shoes causespainful ingrown toenails.Give <strong>you</strong>r feet a break: wearwider shoes during the lasttrimester of pregnancy toavoid ingrown toenails. If<strong>you</strong> do experience an ingrowntoenail, avoid attempting“bathroom surgery.”Repeated cutting of the nailcan cause the condition toworsen over time. It is bestto seek treatment with a footand ankle surgeon.It is also <strong>not</strong> uncommonfor women to experiencea change in their foot sizeduring pregnancy. “A permanentgrowth in a women’sfoot, up to half a size, canoccur from the release of thesame hormone, relaxin, thatallows the pelvis to open todeliver the baby. It makesthe ligaments in <strong>you</strong>r feetmore flexible, causing feet tospread wider and longer,” Dr.Crane adds.Pregnancy and pendingmot<strong>her</strong>hood should be a joy.If foot pain persists, a visit toa foot and ankle surgeon canprovide relief with conservativetreatments such asphysical t<strong>her</strong>apy, foot orthotics,supportive shoes andminor toenail procedures.For more information onfoot and ankle problems, visitFootHealthFacts.org.The American College of Foot andAnkle Surgeons is a professional societyof more than 6,000 foot and ankle surgeons.Founded in 1942, the College’smission is to promote research andprovide continuing education for thefoot and ankle surgical specialty, andto educate the general public on foothealth and conditions of the foot andankle through its consumer Web site,http://FootPhysicians.com.32<strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine

For Women, 2/28/2010 To Women, About Women33

34 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine

Subscribe Now and Save.Only $1.00 per issue. Fill out this form and send to <strong>Focus</strong> onWomen Magazine, 4615 Oakview Court, Ellicott City, MD21042. If <strong>you</strong> prefer, a PDF version of the magazine can beemailed to <strong>you</strong>, instead of receiving a hard copy.Name:__________________________________________Address:________________________________________City: ___________________ State: ____ Zip: _______E-mail:_________________________________________Name on Card: ___________________________________Please check formof payment:o Checko Money Ordero Credit CardIf paying by check, pleaseenter amount $ _____.Make all payments outto <strong>Focus</strong> on WomenMagazine.Credit Card Number: ______________________________Exp. Date: __________Amount: ____________Signature: ________________________________________SMOKERS NEEDEDAre <strong>you</strong> thinking about trying to quit smoking in the nearfuture? Smokers age 18 or over are needed for a research studythat involves an FDA approved medication and a practice quitattempt at Johns HopkinsParticipation requires 11 visits to theJohns Hopkins Bayview Medical Center over 5 weeksYou will be compensated for <strong>you</strong>r time and cooperationPrincipal Investigator: Maxine Stitzer, Ph.D.NA_00019900Call (410) 550-1206 for detailsApproved 09/08/08For <strong>Focus</strong> Women, on Women To Women, Magazine About Women35

Restaurant ReviewMari Luna – Latin Grille1010 Reisterstown Rd.Pikesville, MD 21208410-653-5151ByNoelleSchifferAre <strong>you</strong> looking for abit of zest to kick off2010? Well I wouldstrongly recommend a quicktrip to the wonderfullycharming Mari Luna Restaurantlocated in Pikesville,MD. Mari Luna infuses justthe right amount of Latinflavor into its dishes to leave<strong>you</strong> hungering for more.In its casual yet upscalefeeling dining room, <strong>you</strong> areimmediately drawn to themosaic tiled bar and gauchoinspireddécor. The air isfilled with the aroma of freshfish and Latin spices. As wewere shown to our table wewere immediately met bythe cordial and warm staffwho presented us with fluffyover-sized popovers withmango/papaya butter. Additionally,a complimentarysalad is brought to each table.After indulging in thesepre-meal delights we were36 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazineready to dive into the manyLatin-inspired seafood offeringson the restaurants wellconceived menu.To begin our culinary adventure,we ordered the Sopade Caracol ($6 bowl/$3.50cup), which is a HonduranstyleConch Chowder withCoconut Milk, and the Sopade Langosta ($7 Bowl/$4 cup),a hearty lobster bisque witha little bit of kick to it. Bothsoups were wonderfully flavoredand contained generousamounts of seafood.With soaring expectationswe moved onto the appetizers.We decided to save someroom for our main entrée’sand split an order of MusselsGauchos ($8). The Blue HillBay Mussels are steamedin DosXX Beer along withgrilled Argentineanchorizo sausage,tomato,cilantro, andlime juice,and areserved withbread chips.This wasone of themost flavorful and appealingdishes that I have had inrecent memory. Absolutely a“must have” appetizer!!Far be it for me <strong>not</strong> totake advantage of a greatdeal. Mari Luna offers a $10lunch special which includesa lunch entrée and soft drink.After perusing the surprisinglylong list of offerings onthe menu, I decided on thePeruvian Charcoal Chickenwith Rice and a sweet andzesty Peruvian sauce. Thiswas a wonderful dish filledwith a flavorful blend ofspices and just enough kickto keep <strong>you</strong>r attention. Wealso ordered the CarnitasUruapan, which is plate ofslow roasted, juicy chunks ofpork with white rice on theside, tortillas, onions andcilantro. This was a<strong>not</strong><strong>her</strong>fabulous, aromatic dish witha nice amount of Latin spiceand high quality meat.Although nearly impossible,we could <strong>not</strong> leavewithout sampling a coupleof Mari Luna’s home-madedesserts. I ordered the Tortede Chocolate, which is a darkMexican chocolate cake w/layers of chocolate mousse,and was <strong>not</strong> disappointed.We also sampled the Dulce deLeche Crepes - crepes filledwith vanilla caramel creamw/ vanilla ice cream toppedwith coconut flakes. Bothdesserts were as decadent asthey were delicious.Food: **** ExcellentPrice **** ExcellentService ***** Top ShelfAtmosp<strong>her</strong>e **** ExcellentOverall **** ExcellentOur visit to Mari-Lunawas a wonderful surprise andI can<strong>not</strong> wait to visit again.Muy fabuloso!!!Mari Luna also has a sisterrestaurant that specializesin Mexican Cuisine.

Scoping OutCalendar of EventsBaltimore Museum of ArtWorld reknowned collection ofworks by Matisse, Picasso andCezanne. Showcases art of the19th century through today, plusspecial exhibits and a scenicsculpture garden. Free on thefirst Thursday of every month.10 Art Museum DriveBaltimore, Maryland 21218443-573-1700www.artbma.orgB&O Railroad MuseumVisit the birthplace of Americanrailroading and home of themost comprehensive collection ofrailroad artifacts in the WesternHemisp<strong>her</strong>e. Seasonal rides.410-752-2490 ext. 221www.borail.orgBaltimore Museumof IndustryAward-winning hands on activities.Exciting tours for all ages.Learn about the many everydayitems invented in Baltimore.1415 Key HighwayBaltimore, MD 21230410-727-4808www.thebmi.orgBenjamin BannekerHistorical Park & MuseumA 142-acre institution of culturaland natural history centeringaround America’s first AfricanAmerican man of science.300 Oella DriveOella, MD 21228410-887-1087www.benbanneker.comHistorical Societyof Baltimore CountyHouse and Farm Museumexhibits in nine gallery rooms;research library of maps, plants,and archives for genealogy research.Gift shop.9811 Van Buren LaneCockeysville, MD 21030410-666-1876www.hsobc.orgBasignani Winery15722 Falls RoadSparks, MD 21152410-472-0703www.basignani.comCygnus Wine Cellars3130 Long LaneManchester, MD 21102410-374-6395Elk Run Vineyards15113 Liberty RoadMount Airy, MD 21771-9502410-775-2513An die Musik Live!409 N. Charles StreetBaltimore, MD 21201(410) 385-2638www.andiemusiklive.comFebruary 2009Feb 02Peabody Student JazzFeb 05E/Il -lusive SpacesFeb 06Warren Wolf SextetFeb 07The Makanda Projectfeaturing Carl GrubbsFeb 08Coryell/Auger/Sample TrioFeb 09Peabody Student JazzFeb 13Life, Love and LaughterFeb 14Valentine’s Day with theBorowskysLife, Love and LaughterFeb 15Monument Piano Trio(artists-in-residence)Feb 16Peabody Student JazzFeb 18Allison Miller’s Boom Tic Boom!with Jenny ScheinmanFeb 19Duo TransatlantiqueFeb 21Peruvian Dancer Luciana ProanoFeb 22A Snowball’s Chance . . . In RussiaFeb 23Peabody Student JazzFeb 25Devin Arne QuintetFeb 27Kinobe & Soul BeatAfrica-Ugandan EnsembleFeb 28Ethnic Heritage EnsembleMarch 2009Mar 02Bergamo EnsembleMar 03atomicMar 04Ernesto Tamayo, guitarMar 07David Madoff QuartetMar 09Evolution ContemporaryMusic SeriesMar 10History of ElectronicMusical InstrumentsMar 12Paul Bollenbeck TrioMar 20Chihara TrioMar 24Harmonious BlacksmithEarly Music EnsembleMar 26Roberta Piket QuartetMar 26Poulenc Trio Welcomes Guest Starsto New Univ. of Baltimore SeriesMar 27Boom tic BoomFor Women, To Women, About WomenPlaces toFind <strong>Focus</strong>on WomenMagazineBelvedere SquareBreathe BooksCharles & MulberrySt.City CafeColumbia Libraries(East & West)David’sNatural MarketDorsey SearchVillage CenterDukem EthiopianRestaurantEve’s SalonGiant Super MarketsGlazed to PerfectionGoodlife Wellness....Haraar EthiopianRestaurantHowardCommunity CollegeStudent CenterLittle Patuxent &Vantage Point Rd..Lynn’s Day SpaMad City CoffeeRootsOrganic MarketSprout Organic SpaTaharka Brot<strong>her</strong>sUniversity ofBaltimoreStudent LoungeUniversity ofMarylandCollege ParkStudent UnionWomen’s Clinicat Universityof Maryland atBaltimoreWhole FoodsInner Harbor EastWomen’s IndustrialExchange RestaurantWomen’s ResourceCenter at MercyWomen’s Spaat Mercy37

Music ReviewTrapeze Album by Hu DostReviewed by Natalia Roldan HartNatalia RoldanHartThis independent albumis a thoughtful arrangementof eclectic sounds,all expressive, all poetic.Some songs are edgy rocktunes with an infusion ofsoft sounds;ot<strong>her</strong>s, soulfulmelodiesincorporatingthe fluidityof the Frenchlanguage.But mostimportantly,all of thelyrics in thealbum arevague- seeminglyfor artistic licenseor for the listener’s variedinterpretations. One of myfavorite songs on the disc is“Trespasser,” an empoweringsong that is soft on the spiritand talks to its listenersabout unexpected changesand challenges in life. “Waiting,”my second favorite, isabout a lovers’ wait for theirone and only. You can feel thelonging and ache in MokshaSommer’s vocals (principalvocalist).If I must compare thealbum to any ot<strong>her</strong>, I wouldsay it has a touch of NoraJones-in essence, the sametype of pensive lyrics, thesame relaxing melodies, yetall the while profound. However,the album has a muchmore worldly quality witha Mediterranean vibe andearthy beats. Each song hasa purposeful message- somemeditative and sad, whileot<strong>her</strong>s express transformationand revival. Mokshauses <strong>her</strong> voice well to go fromsmooth and contemplative toupbeat and edgy.In summary, this reviewis but a quick glimpse intothe talented musical worldof Hu Dost. If <strong>you</strong>’re lookingto experience an album withglobal rhythm and a sensefor poetry, Trapeze may be<strong>you</strong>r next musical fancy.VOLUNTEERS NEEDED!We are looking for women aged 25 and 65 to participate in a study of HPV infections.Volunteers will be asked to collect vaginal samples at home for HPV testing and to completequestionnaires. No Pap tests or in-person visits.Volunteers will receive the results of their HPV tests and $75 compensation.To be eligible, women must be in general good health, have had sex with men, and haveused the internet to search for romantic partners in the past year (e.g. posted or respondedto an ad on an internet dating website). Volunteers must <strong>not</strong> be pregnant or breast feeding,or planning a pregnancy in the next 6 months, or have had a hysterectomy.Please call 1-866-820-7833 for more information, or e-mail hhhstudy@u.washington.edu. You may also visit our website: http://depts.washington.edu/hpvstudyThe confidentiality of email correspondence can<strong>not</strong> be guaranteed.38 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine

P R O F E S S I O N A L W E D D I N G C O N S U L T I N GPersonalized wedding management,tailored to fit <strong>you</strong>r dreams and bud<strong>get</strong>eeProfessional certified wedding vendorsGuides couples graciously from thebeginning of the planning stagesuntil the last dance of the receptionNatalieWest MakelNationally RecognizedProfessional WeddingConsultantnuptialplanner@yahoo.comMember of the Associationof Bridal ConsultantsF O R T H E B U S Y B R I D E A N D G R O O M , C O N TA C T U S4 1 0 . 3 0 3 . 7 0 0 8 e U N F O R G E T T A B L E W E D D I N G S E R V I C E S . C O MFor Women, To Women, About Women39

Volunteeringto Help Ot<strong>her</strong>s… and YourselfByTraciBarnettAs the New Year (andnew decade) beginsmany of us search formeaningful ways to achieveboth personal and professionalsatisfaction in our lives.One option worth consideringis serving as a volunteer forsomething about which <strong>you</strong>are passionate. As a volunteer<strong>not</strong> only do <strong>you</strong> help ot<strong>her</strong>s,<strong>you</strong> also sharpen skills<strong>you</strong> already have, discovercompetencies and talents <strong>you</strong>did <strong>not</strong> know <strong>you</strong> had andput those skills into action.T<strong>her</strong>e are more than11,000 women (and even afew men) throughout centralMaryland who serve as GirlScout volunteers, includingTroop Leaders, Service UnitManagers, Troop CookieManagers, First Aiders,Trainers and Troop Triporganizers. After participatingin multi-level formaleducational and leadershiptrainings, they serve as mentors,surrogates and advisorsto girls ages 5-17 participatingin a myriad of Girl Scoutactivities.Marva Williams, a retiredSocial Security Administrationmanager and analyst,has been a volunteer for GirlScouts of Central Maryland’snationally renowned BeyondBars program for 17 years.This program enables incarceratedmot<strong>her</strong>s and theirdaughters to stay connectedthrough bi-monthly GirlScout meetings at the Women’sCorrectional Institute inJessup, MD. When asked whyshe volunteers she explained40 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazinethat she lost <strong>her</strong> mot<strong>her</strong> atage nine and appreciates theneed for girls to stay connectedwith their mot<strong>her</strong>s. Sheadded, “I saw the need—aneed for capable, dependable,willing and committedpeople. I have something Ican share; I can serve as arole model and help ot<strong>her</strong>s.”Patty Salazar, a<strong>not</strong><strong>her</strong>long-time Girl Scout volunteer,was a Troop Leader formore than 10 years and wasthen “promoted” to ServiceUnit Manager, a position shehas held for eight years. Justas she helped girls achievesuccess when she was aTroop Leader, as a volunteerGirl Scout manager sheworks to help ot<strong>her</strong> adultsdevelop girls of courage, confidenceand character.Some of the skills Pattyand ot<strong>her</strong> volunteers honedas a Girl Scout volunteerinclude: managing time andresources; providing a welcomingenvironment; problemresolution; matchingvolunteer talent with needs;facilitating training; and, theability to listen to and acceptnew ideas that may differfrom one’s own. “Managingvolunteers teaches <strong>you</strong> howto motivate people and howto keep them motivated, inspiredand accountable eventhough they are <strong>not</strong> beingpaid,” Patty reflected. “Youlearn that it’s more the carrotthan the stick.”These are but two examplesof meaningful volunteerexperiences. For both ofthese women, the satisfactionthey receive from serving asvolunteers and the friendshipsthey have made alongthe way are very importantto them. “When <strong>you</strong> [the volunteer]need help or advice,t<strong>her</strong>e is always someone tocall on,” Patty said. “I havehad mentors along the way;it was good to have someoneto talk to and to <strong>get</strong> theirperspective.” Knowing theymake a measurable differencein a girl’s life whiledeveloping their own skill sethas had a powerful impact onthe quality of their volunteerexperience.Girl Scouts has alwaysbeen, and continues to be, anorganization w<strong>her</strong>e womenare encouraged to try newthings, step outside theircomfort zone and try theirhand at leadership. In doingso, they serve as role modelsto the girls with whom theyinteract. In this new decadeI encourage <strong>you</strong> to becomea volunteer, for Girl Scoutsor a<strong>not</strong><strong>her</strong> organization, andexperience the satisfaction ofknowing that <strong>you</strong> are makinga difference. You may besurprised by the personaland professional developmentthat comes with it. Don’twait… start <strong>you</strong>r volunteerjourney today!Traci A. Barnett is Chief Executive Officerfor Girl Scouts of Central Maryland,which provides leadership training,activities and events for nearly 30,000girls ages 5-17 and 11,000 adultvolunteers. Visit Girl Scouts of CentralMaryland’s website: www.gscm.org formore information about Girl Scouting incentral Maryland.

Miracles Made EasyDear Soul Sisters & Brot<strong>her</strong>s in Beingness …Do <strong>you</strong> know how to create miracles?Are <strong>you</strong> aware everyone has this power?Are <strong>you</strong> applying this knowledge on a daily basis?Miracles Made Easy shows <strong>you</strong> how to claim <strong>you</strong>r birthrightto create the kind of life <strong>you</strong> want. It is …… a Spiritual Primerfor those who want to discover the power of belief and the power ofthought to make miracles happen as every-day events.… a Powerful Review of Principlesfor those who want to understand how the world really works and howto make it work better for them.… a Doubt-Busterfor those who find it difficult to believe the Universal Truths that guideand support all life.… a How–To Guide to Manifestingfor those who welcome tips and techniques, stories with easy-to-rememberexamples and experiments to try.Once enough people know how to create miracles in their personal lives,we can combine forces and create miracles to<strong>get</strong><strong>her</strong> to solve all the world’sproblems… to create a safer, saner, healthier, happier world. Now thatsounds like something worth doing, don’t <strong>you</strong> think?Download <strong>you</strong>r FREE copy of Miracles Made Easy or order a discountedbook at www.MiraclesMadeEasy.com. Also availableat Amazon.com and local book stores.Remember, every time <strong>you</strong> pass on this empoweringinformation, <strong>you</strong> serve as a positive contributingforce to creating the better world that is trulypossible. On behalf of all those who will be so glad<strong>you</strong> did—Thanks.P.S. With the coming holiday season, considera gift of Miracles. The book suits teens on up.Families will find it interesting, fun reading full ifideas to explore to<strong>get</strong><strong>her</strong>.Ann McGillMidWife of Consciousness—Birthing into BeingnessMidWife@AnnMcGill.comwww.MiraclesMadeEasy.com703-262-0620Visit the website for the FREE Downloadable BookFor Women, To Women, About Women

Win the <strong>Focus</strong>ed Woman Contest!!____________________________________________Name____________________________________________Address__________________________ _____ _________City State Zip Code____________________________________________E-mailOnly one entry per household.42 <strong>Focus</strong> on Women MagazineFind the focused woman giving testimonyand win a pass at a local gym or arearestaurant. Simply circle the <strong>Focus</strong>edWoman, fill out this form and send to:<strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine,4615 Oakview Ct.Ellicott City, MD 21042

THE CASEY CARES FOUNDATION’S10th ANNIVERSARY GALACelebrating a decade of uplifting programswith a special touch for critically ill childrenPlease join us for anevening of food, festivities, and fun!Saturday, March 27, 20106:30 p.m. to midnightGrand Lodge Bonnie Blink304 International CircleHunt Valley, MDFor tickets call 443.568.0064or visitwww.CaseyCaresFoundation.org<strong>Focus</strong> on Women Magazine