division one - Victorian Amateur Football Association

UMPIRESApologies to all if this seems a little rushed. I’vejust been making the most of school holidays bycleaning up at the Crown Casino poker tables withAD and Stokesy (note, the VAFAUA encouragesresponsible gambling).After the unparalleled success of last week’sassessment of some of our more prominentumpires, I’m pleased to bring you (once againwith zero input from Macca) the latest in myhighly researched and unimpeachable (Google it)analysis of the VAFAUA’s finest. Well, sort of.Russell ‘Not Again?’ Davidson- After sixconsecutive Premier Grand Final appointments,experts are beginning to suggest that there maybe a pattern emerging. Further investigations mustensue, but for now the only logical conclusion onecan draw is that Rusty is in possession of someinflammatory photographs of Benny Goodman orTony Hales. Or both.Matthew ‘Opportunity’ Pryor- Shares a namewith a law of the game that players still don’t seemto understand. For this reason, is considered a bigchance to feature late in September. Seems far toopolite and mature for his age, so if you have anydirt on him please let me know.Grant ‘Six Thirty’ Wardrop- Not sure if thecoaches have noticed this one, but the old-timer isrenowned for arriving at training after the warmuplaps have been completed, and is thus (at lastcount) approximately 12.4km more unfit than Iam. Can’t give an exact figure because Chuckyseems to vary the length of the track dependingon his mood.Ryan ‘Wild Man’ Robertson- Had the dubioushonour last week of performing what Rowdydubbed ‘the dumbest thing he’d seen in umpiring’.A fairly harsh call by the Senior Coach (it was justa positioning error) who clearly wasn’t aroundSteve McCarthy & Cam DavidsonCAM’S MID SEASON REVIEWPART 2when a former goal umpire decided to air his dirtylaundry regarding his grand final appointment....on Facebook....the night before the game.David ‘Jetsetter’ Lepair- The reigning PremierB GF officiator is clearly pretty comfortable withthis year’s competition, and has decided to headoff to Europe for six weeks. We’re not sure whetherDave is getting in some high-altitude training, orwhether he’s just getting drunk, but he’ll no doubthave an influence on the final positionings at theend of the year.Sean ‘Junior’ Scully Jr- Enjoys his firstrepresentative game this weekend. A welldeservedhonour for the injury prone member ofthe VAFAUA Royal Family. If he can stay fit, shouldhave a big finish to the year.‘Pistol’ Peter....anyone seen this bloke lately?Thanks from SimmoAnthony Simpson would like to thank all who wereinvolved in helping him celebrate the milestone of400 games last Saturday. In particular the PrahranAssumption and Old Paradians Football Clubs. Tohis partners on the day, Tony Hope and his brotherPeter along with the rest of the panel, they madethe day memorable. The Simpson family supportwas also there as usual on the day. And later on agreat night was had by all.SoftYes, goal umpires, we bagged you a few weeksago when some of you couldn’t handle the wetconditions. Well we take it all back. A coupleof Sundays ago at Sportscover Arena the threefield umpires donned orange shirts to celebrateMulticultural Round, but they were LONG-SLEEVED!!! Interesting look.THE AMATEUR FOOTBALLER 201231