A Discussion with Rabbi Shmuel Kamenetsky on âSSAâ - Hakirah.org

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40 : Hạkirah, the Flatbush Journal of Jewish Law and Thoughtyet achieved healing, even after major effort, is not proof that s/hecannot eventually achieve healing. 15Rav <strong>Kamenetsky</strong> rhetorically asked, “How can we tell theworld it is okay for some people to give up trying? Doesn’t the halachahprovide different people <strong>with</strong> different degrees and forms ofchallenges? How can there be any message other than everyone iscapable of healing?” A perfect example demonstrating the Rosh Yeshiva’spoint is a JONAH client who struggled through therapy forSSA for seven years before achieving success. What if he said afterfive years of major struggle that he is one of those individuals whocan never change? Should he have simply given up? The Rosh Yeshivaconcluded this line of questioning by stating, “When it comesto homosexuality, from a Torah perspective there is no other optionother than working at overcoming.”Accepting a False Identity as “Gay” Is Inconsistent <strong>with</strong>TorahThe Rosh Yeshiva was emphatic about the need to expose the falsenotion that a person should identify him/herself as homosexual andemphasized how this position is clearly against the Torah. Homosexualityis not a personal identity; there is no word in the Torahfor homosexual. Homosexuals should not view themselves as mutantsof some sort who have been destined by G-d for a life of exclusivehomosexuality. A proper Torah perspective is to view thesituation as a struggle to overcome just like any other struggle that a15An example came to mind that proved the Rosh Yeshiva’s point. I amfamiliar <strong>with</strong> a person who was 100 pounds overweight for most of hislife. He struggled for 40 years <strong>with</strong> diets but was never able to successfullymaintain any weight loss beyond a short period of time. Then, at 50, hefinally lost the 100 pounds he so desperately sought to lose. Ten years later,he has still kept the weight off. This individual sincerely wanted tolose weight all his life. His not succeeding for 40 years does not mean hewas incapable of success. It meant that he was not in the right emotional/mentalspace to fully deal <strong>with</strong> the emotional or mental blocks thatwere preventing his success.
A <strong>Discussion</strong> <strong>with</strong> <strong>Rabbi</strong> <strong>Shmuel</strong> <strong>Kamenetsky</strong> on “SSA” : 41person may deal <strong>with</strong>. 16 Defining oneself as “gay or lesbian” wouldbe the equivalent of adopting a personal identity as a proud promiscuousheterosexual Jew or accepting an identity that incorporatesany other Torah violation. As the Rosh Yeshiva explained, it is theutmost disrespect to have “pride” in a desire for a Torah violationand to then consider it as a personal identity. It is a chillul Hashem(desecration or profanation of G-d’s name).Obligation of the RabbanimAnother essential observation made by the Rosh Yeshiva is the specialobligation of the Rabbanim to help create an atmosphere whereanyone, and in particular a teenager dealing <strong>with</strong> these issues, canspeak freely <strong>with</strong>in the community to a parent, rabbi, or mentorand, when he does so, is to be treated <strong>with</strong> love and compassion.Authority figures can then guide same-sex strugglers towards a pathof transformation that enables them to overcome their inclinations.The key point to remember is that those who struggle are primarilyinnocent victims—unless they choose to accept a false identity andsubsequently choose to mislead others.Dangers and Risks of Homosexuality According to IndependentU.S. Government ReportsThe Rosh Yeshiva expressed concern about health issues that affectthose engaging in a homosexual lifestyle. He recognized that homosexualactivists are trying to promote the notion that identifying asa homosexual is no different than being heterosexual when it comesto love, marriage, and relationships—a position he believes is nottrue. The Rosh Yeshiva thus asked that we provide research in thisarticle about some of the unhealthy consequences of living a homosexuallifestyle.Dr. Kevin Fenton, MD, a director of the Centers for DiseaseControl (CDC), after referring to a series of statistics released in2010 by the CDC for men who have sex <strong>with</strong> other men, notedthat HIV and AIDS remains “a crisis that is far from over in this16The Talmudic example of Elisha ben Abuyah, cited in footnote 5, illustratesthe dangers of internalizing or accepting a false identity.
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A Discussion with Rabbi Shmuel Kamenetsky on âSSAâ - Hakirah.org