House Instructions of Mr. Yan (Yanshi Jiaxun) - Asia for Educators ...

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Primary Source Document, with Que stions (DBQ) onEXC ERPTS FRO M HOUSE INSTRUCTIONS OF MR. YA N (YA NSHI JIAXUN)Generallyparents’inabilitytoinstructtheirownchildrencomesnotfromanyinclinationjusttoletthemfallintoevilwaysbutonlyfromparents’beingunabletoendurethechildren’slooks[of unhappiness] from repeated scoldings, or to bear beating them, lest it do damage to thechildren’sphysicalbeing.Weshould,however,takeillnessbywayofillustration:howcanwenotusedrugs,medicines,acupuncture,orcauterytocureit?Shouldwethenviewstrictnessofreproofandpunishmentasaformofcrueltytoone’sownkithandkin?Trulythereisnootherwaytodealwithit.…As for maintaining proper respect between father and son, one cannot allow too muchfamiliarity; in the love among kin, one cannot tolerate impoliteness. If there is impoliteness,thenparentalsolicitudeisnotmatchedbyfilialrespect;ifthereistoomuchfamiliarity,itgivesrisetoindifferenceandrudeness.Someone has asked why Chen Kang [a disciple of Confucius] was pleased to hear thatgentlemenkepttheirdistancefromtheirsons,andtheansweristhatthiswasindeedthecase;gentlemendidnotpersonallyteachtheirchildren[because,asYangoesontoshow,therearepassagesintheclassicsofasexualkind,whichitwouldnotbeproperforafathertoteachhissons.]…Intheloveofparentsforchildren,itisrarethatonesucceedsintreatingthemequally.Fromantiquitytothepresenttherearemanycasesofthisfailing.Itisonlynaturaltolovethosewhoarewiseandtalented,butthosewhoarewaywardanddullalsodeservesympathy.Partialityintreatment,evenwhendoneoutofgenerousmotives,turnsoutbadly.…BrothersAfter the appearance of humankind, there followed the conjugal relationship; the conjugalrelationshipwasfollowedbytheparental;theparentalwasfollowedbythefraternal.Withinthefamily,thesethreearetheintimaterelationships.Theotherdegreesofkinshipalldevelopoutofthesethree.Thereforeamonghumanrelationshipsonecannotbuttakethese[three]mostseriously.…Whenbrothersareatoddswitheachother,thensonsandnephewswillnotloveeachother,andthisinturnwillleadtothecousinsdriftingapart,resultingfinallyintheirservantstreatingoneanotherasenemies.Whenthishappensthenstrangerscanstepontheirfacesandtrampleupontheirbreastsandtherewillbenoonetocometotheiraid.Therearemenwhoareabletomakefriends with distinguished men of the empire, winning their affection, and yet are unable toshow proper respect toward their own elder brothers. How strange that they should succeedwiththemanyandfailwiththefew!Thereareotherswhoareabletocommandtroopsinthethousands and inspire such loyalty in them that they will die willingly for them and yet areunable to show kindness toward their own younger brothers. How strange that they shouldsucceedwithstrangersandfailwiththeirownfleshandblood!…Asia for E duca tors | Columbia University | http ://afe.easia.columbia.edu Page 4 of 6
Primary Source Document, with Que stions (DBQ) onEXC ERPTS FRO M HOUSE INSTRUCTIONS OF MR. YA N (YA NSHI JIAXUN)FamilyGovernanceBeneficial influences are transmitted from superiors to inferiors and bequeathed by earlier tolatergenerations.Soifafatherisnotloving,thesonwillnotbefilial;ifanelderbrotherisnotfriendly, the younger will not be respectful; if a husband is not just, the wife will not beobedient.Whenafatheriskindbutthesonrefractory,whenanelderbrotherisfriendlybuttheyoungerarrogant,whenahusbandisjustbutawifeoverbearing,thenindeedtheyarethebadpeopleoftheworld;theymustbecontrolledbypunishments;teachingandguidancewillnotchange them. If rod and wrath are not used in family discipline, the faults of the son willimmediatelyappear.Ifpunishmentsarenotproperlyawarded,thepeoplewillnotknowhowtoact.Theuseofclemencyandseverityingoverningafamilyisthesameasinastate.Confuciussaid,“Extravaganceleadstoinsubordination,andparsimonytomeanness.Itisbettertobemeanthantobeinsubordinate.” 1 Againhesaid,“ThoughamanhasabilitiesasadmirableasthoseoftheDukeofZhou,yetifhebeproudorniggardly,thoseotherthingsarereallynotworthbeinglookedat.” 2 Thatistosay,amanmaybethriftybutshouldnotbestingy.Thriftmeansbeingfrugalandeconomicincarryingouttherites;stinginessmeansshowingnopityforthoseinpovertyandurgentneed.Nowadaysthosewhowouldgivealmsareextravagant,butinbeingthriftyarestingy.Itwouldbepropertogivealmswithoutextravaganceandbethriftywithoutbeingstingy.…Awifeinpresidingoverhouseholdsuppliesshouldusewine,food,andclothingonlyastheritesspecify.Justasinthestate,wherewomenarenotallowedtoparticipateinsettingpolicies,sointhefamily,theyshouldnotbepermittedtoassumeresponsibilityforaffairs.Iftheyarewise, talented, and versed in the ancient and modem writings, they ought to help theirhusbands by supplementing the latter’s deficiency. No hen should herald the dawn lestmisfortunefollow.…Theburdenofdaughtersonthefamilyisheavyindeed.YethowelsecanHeavengivelifetotheteemingpeopleandancestorspassontheirbodilyexistencetoposterity?Manypeopletodaydislikehavingdaughtersandmistreattheirownfleshandblood.HowcantheybelikethisandstillhopeforHeaven’sblessing?…Itiscommonforwomentodoteonason‐in‐lawandtomaltreatadaughter‐in‐law.Dotingonason‐in‐lawgivesrisetohatredfrombrothers;maltreatingadaughter‐in‐lawbringsonslanderfromsisters.Thuswhenthesewomen,whethertheyactorremainsilent,drawcriticismfromthemembersofthefamily,itisthemotherwhoistherealcauseofit.… 1Analects7:35.2Analects8:11.Asia for E duca tors | Columbia University | http ://afe.easia.columbia.edu Page 5 of 6
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