Children's Needs – Parenting Capacity - Digital Education Resource ...

Child development and parents’ responses – adolescence 191up in very dysfunctional families have learnt to distrust adults (Cleaver and Walkerwith Meadows 2004).Not all young people suffer isolation and loneliness when their parents havea serious disorder. Some teenagers do find a friend or relative in whom they canconfide. Research which includes the views of young people highlights how friendsand relatives, if carefully selected, can provide social support and help young peoplecope with the difficulties they experience (Bancroft et al. 2004; Velleman and Reuber2007).I speak to my aunt, who listens and calms me down.My friend cheers me up. And I know someone who has been through a similarexperience, and that’s helpful. And my teacher is trained to help – he listens andgives advice, which is great.(Two young people, quoted in Velleman and Reuber 2007, p.41)Although relationships between parents and children can suffer because of parents’difficulties, this is not always the case. Indeed, research on parental mental illnesshas found that parents and children may report strong and positive relationships.We are still the best of friends. We do really have a strong relationship and also Ifeel that I’ve matured a lot quicker which to me I think is a good thing becauseI’ve got a different outlook to a lot of other girls that are my age...(Ruth 18, quoted in Aldridge and Becker 2003, p.84)Social presentationExpected presentationYoung people aged 16 to 18 years are able to take care of themselves. They can takecontrol for their own clothes, hair and skin care and rarely take advice on what towear. Young people’s appearance continues to be an extremely important issue andmany spend a considerable proportion of their disposable income on clothing andtoiletries.Young people are increasingly competent in adjusting their behaviour, conversationand dress to different situations.Possible impact on social presentationThe problems for social presentation are a lack of guidance to moderate the extremesof dress and presentation, insufficient funds for adequate or appropriate clothingand toiletries, and the use of aggression inappropriately to solve problems.When young people feel rejected or alienated from their families they may resort toextreme modes of dress, body mutilation or adornment in a gesture of independence.