Children's Needs â Parenting Capacity - Digital Education Resource ...

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176 Children’s Needs – Parenting CapacityLee 2005). Children who wander the streets are shown to be very much at risk ofdetachment from school and involvement in crime (Wade et al. 1998).The isolation (whether self-imposed or due to parental threats) can leave youngpeople in a particularly vulnerable position. Edwards and Smith (1997) in theirstudy reported that young carers felt there was nobody there for them and thatprofessionals were working exclusively with the adults. They wanted someone tolisten to their experiences and understand their difficulties. Despite the practiceguidance for a more holistic family approach to assessment, which includesaddressing the needs of young carers, research suggests that little has changed. Apartfrom the support received from young carers’ projects, statutory professionals frommental health teams continue to adopt a patient-oriented approach (Aldridge andBecker 2003).Although some teenagers may separate themselves from their families, for othersparental problems may mean that separation is thrust upon them. When thishappens, some adolescents may visit their parents when in treatment, an experiencewhich can be extremely distressing and for which they may need considerablesupport to understand what they have observed.I went once [to visit mum] and she was in this, in this like, it looked like a wackoroom. It was all mats and everywhere ... It had a door that could be locked fromthe outside you know what I’m saying? It looked depressing and I mean I knowshe was in a stage where she was going about, you know going all funny but theway they pin ’em down, pin ’em down onto the floor ... They need help, they don’tneed to be locked away.(Girl aged 14, quoted in Aldridge and Becker 2003, p. 50)Social presentationExpected presentationPhysical appearance becomes increasingly important. Much time is spent in front ofthe mirror scrutinising the changes which puberty has brought. Teenagers becomevery conscious about their appearance, want to choose their own clothes and theirhair style and are sensitive to criticism, particularly from peers. Adolescents withouthandicapping disabilities are able to look after their own personal hygiene.Children in this age group can communicate easily with both adults and peersand are able to regulate their language and non-verbal behaviour to be appropriateto the situation.
Child development and parents’ responses – adolescence 177Possible impact on social presentationThere are two major issues for this age group: the stigma and bullying which mayresult from the consequences of physical neglect, and learnt inappropriate behavioursuch as violence, bullying and sexual abuse.The first problem described is that of physical neglect. For example, when parentshave learning disabilities and care for a child with profound learning and physicaldisabilities, they may not have the resources or capacities to meet the child’s needs.Substance misuse, mental illness and domestic violence may also affect parents’capacity to care for their own and their children’s needs. Although this can havedevastating effects on young children, teenagers are not immune.At one time I went through a depression that went on for about a year where Ididn’t bother do the housework, and I didn’t bother to wash myself ... I didn’t givea shit about who said what about how the children looked ... People must haveknown, people must have seen the way I was looking and the way the childrenwere looking ... but it’s almost like once you get yourself into that, it’s like you justsit and watch it.(Mother, quoted in NCH Action for Children 1994, p.47)Perhaps equally important is the stigma associated with neglect. This may beacutely felt by children of this age because they are self-conscious about theirappearance and sensitive to how others see them. When parental drinking or druguse diverts monies which would ordinarily be used for household essentials andclothes, or mental illness and learning disabilities restrict parenting capacity, childrenmay find it difficult to keep up an acceptable appearance and friendships may bejeopardised.They spend all the money on drink. There’s no soap in the house and all my clothesare too small. I lost my girlfriend because she said I smell. Others call me namesand make fun of me. It hurts.(Paul aged 14, quoted in ChildLine 1997, p.37)Children are acutely aware of the stigma of mental illness, learning disability,problem substance misuse and domestic violence and most believe that it shouldbe kept hidden within the family. Children’s feelings of shame and a wish to keepit secret were clearly illustrated in Somers’ (2007) study of parental mental illness,‘Keep it in the house, if people outside knew you would get a bad name’ (Somers 2007,p.1326).A further problem results from children not learning the accepted social skills ofinteraction with adults outside the family. Growing up in families where violence isan accepted way of dealing with problems can result in some teenagers using violentor aggressive language and behaviour towards peers and adults. When children areunable to deal successfully with teachers, this can result in negative interactions andreinforces learning deficits and feelings of alienation (Gray 1993).
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Children’s Needs - Parenting Capa
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List of figures and tablesFiguresFi
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AcknowledgementsWe acknowledge with
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PART I: GENERAL ISSUESAFFECTING PAR
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3Which children are most at risk of
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4Child development and parents’re
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Page 213 and 214: BibliographyAbel, E.L. (1998) ‘Fe
Page 215 and 216: Bibliography 213Barnardo’s (2005)
Page 217 and 218: Bibliography 215Brandon, M., Bailey
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Page 221 and 222: Bibliography 219Davies, C. and Ward
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Page 225 and 226: Bibliography 223Edwards, A. and Smi
Page 227 and 228: Bibliography 225Flately, J., Kersha
Page 229 and 230: Bibliography 227Gottlieb, S. (2002)
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Bibliography 229HM Government (2011
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Bibliography 231Jaffe, P., Wolfe, D
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Bibliography 233Kolar, A., Brown, B
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Bibliography 235Margison, F. and Br
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Bibliography 237Merikangas, K., Die
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Bibliography 239Murray, L., Cooper,
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Bibliography 241Office for National
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Bibliography 243Priory Group (2006)
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Bibliography 245Royal College of Ph
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Bibliography 247Singleton, N., Bump
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Bibliography 249Swofford, C. D., Sc
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Bibliography 251Walker, F. (1995) Y
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Indexabuse see child abuse; child n
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Index 255children 16 years and over
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Index 257problem drug use 52, 53, 5
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Index 259eating disorders 54, 137,
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Index 261mothers’ problem drug us
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Index 263MARAC (multi-agency risk a
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Index 265cognitive and language dev
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Index 267definition 26domestic viol
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Index 269withdrawal symptoms 53, 56
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Index 2713-4 years 1335-10 years 14
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Index 273parental mental illness 30
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