Children's Needs – Parenting Capacity - Digital Education Resource ...

Child development and parents’ responses – children under 5 years 129This is an age when children are plagued with irrational fears. For example, manyare frightened of the dark or of loud noises (Fahlberg 1991). However, as mentionedearlier, the main fear of young children is that of abandonment, perhaps not soirrational in today’s world (Owusu-Bempah 2006).Children are pleased to be able to do some things for themselves, and by 4 yearsmany are able to dress and undress themselves although they generally enjoy beinghelped. With maturation children normally learn to have control over bladder andbowels (Smith and Cowie 1993).Possible impact on emotional and behavioural developmentThis age group is very vulnerable to the development of emotional and behaviouraldisturbance. The extent of their distress may be missed because young childrencannot easily articulate their feelings, and their observable reactions may not tallywith their emotional state.Parental mental illness places children at significantly greater risk of behaviouraland emotional problems when compared with the general community (Oysermanet al. 2000; Covell and Howe 2009). Some observational studies of depressedmothers, however, suggest this may reflect the mother’s negative perceptions of herchild rather than real differences in behaviour (Lang et al. 1996).Alcohol or drug addiction, domestic violence and mental illness may result inparents showing little warmth towards their children, leaving them feeling unlovedand rejected (VanDeMark et al. 2005). Alternatively, the use of substances mayenable some parents to more easily demonstrate their emotions.In many cases parents may only express emotions when they have been drinking,which leaves children deprived of affection and afraid that their parents don’t lovethem.(Turning Point 2006, p.9)Drug or alcohol addiction or mental illness may result in parents being inconsistentin expressing emotions to their children. As a result children learn to alter theirbehaviour according to their parents’ state of mind.She knew not to go near me in the morning ’till I had me foil, then Mammywould play. In the mornings the sickness was the worst ... I’d just be telling her toget away. Once I had the gear into me I’d be the best mother on the earth.(Drug-using mother of 4-year-old girl, quoted in Hogan and Higgins2001, p.22)Problem drug-using parents also felt that they were not as available to theirchildren (aged 4–12 years) as other parents who did not have drug problems. Theyrecognised that their lifestyle – time spent obtaining money for drugs, time intreatment and custodial sentences – had a negative impact on their children (Hoganand Higgins 2001).