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La Salle and the discovery of the great West - North Central ...

La Salle and the discovery of the great West - North Central ...

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1680-88.] HIS MANNERS. 339received with a gratitude equal to <strong>the</strong> genuine friendshipfrom which it proceeds; <strong>and</strong>, however unjustare <strong>the</strong> charges made against me, I should be muchmore unjust myself if I did not feel that I have asmuch reason to thank you for telling me <strong>of</strong> <strong>the</strong>m aaI have to complain <strong>of</strong> o<strong>the</strong>rs for inventing <strong>the</strong>m." As for what you say about my look <strong>and</strong> manner,I myself confess that you are not far from right.But naturam expellas ;<strong>and</strong> if I am wanting in expansiveness<strong>and</strong> show <strong>of</strong> feeling towards those withwhom I associate, it is only through a timidity whichis natural to me, <strong>and</strong> which has made me leave variousemployments, vjhere 'without it I could have succeeded^But as I judged myself ill-fittedfor <strong>the</strong>m on account<strong>of</strong> this defect, I have chosen a life more suited tomy solitary disposition; which, never<strong>the</strong>less, doesnot make me harsh to my people, though, joined toa life among savages, it makes me, perhaps, lesspolished <strong>and</strong> complaisant than <strong>the</strong> atmosphere <strong>of</strong>Paris requires. I well believe that <strong>the</strong>re is self-lovein this; <strong>and</strong> that, knowing how little I am accustomedto a more polite life, <strong>the</strong> fear <strong>of</strong> making mistakesmakes me more reserved than I like to be. SoI rarely expose myself towhose company I am afraid <strong>of</strong>conversation with those inmaking blunders, <strong>and</strong>can hardly help making <strong>the</strong>m. Abbe' Renaudotknows with what repugnance I had <strong>the</strong> honor toappear before Monseigneur de Conti ;<strong>and</strong> sometimesit took me a week to make up my mind to go to <strong>the</strong>audience, — that is, when I had time to think about

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