Iran: Cultural Values, Self images and Negotiation Behavior

Iran: Cultural Values, Self-images and Negotiating Behaviorconsuming; the initial refusal to accept a proposal must be repeated enough tounderline the fact that the recipient knows that he is unworthy, but accepts out ofdeference. When an Iranian wishes to stress his sincerity, he will say tœ'arof nist. Thisis not to be confused with tœ'arof.Iranians do not practice tœ'arof on foreigners (who do not know the rules), andthey do not expect foreigners to practice esoteric Iranian customs. It may even be saidthat Iranians feel a certain discomfort in the face of attempts by foreigners to obeyIranian etiquette mores. Iranians, however, are extremely and genuinely hospitable toforeigners. Like many other cultural traits, this too seems to contradict the stigma ofstinginess or frugality often attached to Iranians.Iranians have a strong feeling of representing their culture vis-à-vis foreigners. Asa rule, they maintain a façade of politeness even under tension. Most accounts ofdifficult negotiations are in agreement that the Iranian side seemed to pride itself onnot “loosing their cool,” and on maintaining political correctness and etiquette.One custom, unique to Shiite Islam, is the belief in ritual unclean-ness (najjes –nejasat). According to this tenet of Shiite faith, a believer (i.e., Shiite) who touches aheretic (Christian, Jew, pagan) becomes impure and must purify himself. Thisprecept, if observed conscientiously, precludes physical contact with heretics – anobvious obstacle to normal interaction. The manner in which Iranians, includingscrupulously religious ones, circumvent this tenet is indicative of the predominance ofpragmatic politics over religious principles.EmotionalismIranian culture allows for expression of extreme emotions – in particular feelingsof insult, rage, and personal umbrage. Some observers rightly distinguish betweenspontaneous and unbridled expression of feelings, and socially appropriate publicdemonstration of emotion – particularly anger. The former is not a typical Iranian trait(as can be seen at Iranian funerals), whereas the latter is a social device or accountingprocedure, which relays to the surroundings a message of emotion. 132 The goal of thelatter is pragmatic; it declares to the target audience that the individual is hurt,insulted, and angry, and that he must be appeased. Sophisticated use of emotionaloutbreaks is highly regarded as cleverness.In the course of official talks – be they political or business – it is rare that therelationship reaches a level of camaraderie that allows for humoristic exchanges. It isnot politically correct for Iranians to malign themselves by telling foreigners jokesabout Iranian frailties, and their strong sense of etiquette does not allow for exchangesof jokes.132 See Beeman, “What is (Iranian) National Character?”36