hEalthLiving by thenumbersMy life with migrainesTExT: AnOnYMOuSAfter hearing that I had spent five days in hospitalfor an intravenous drug treatment to stop a 17day migraine, Steven Parker, Director of The<strong>Center</strong>, asked me to write an article about livingwith migraines. At first I was hesitant, not wanting to openmyself up in that way, but then after thinking it over andcommiserating with a fellow migraine sufferer, I decided todo it. Living with migraines, or any chronic pain for thatmatter, can be a wearing and isolating experience, and ifthrough reading this article someone thinks she gets me, sheunderstands what I’m going through, then it will be worth it.I was diagnosed with migraines at the age of 6, havinginherited them from my dad. They have progressivelybecome worse through the years until my current diagnosis:Chronic intractable migraines. The chronic part meansthat I have them often. Intractable means that they last along time — ranging from a few days, to my longest one,which occurred two years ago and lasted 42 days. As youcan imagine, the 42 day migraine spurred me into action tomake it stop! What I’ve come to realize, however, is thatit’s not so much make it stop as make it work. I can assureyou that it’s a fine line to follow and a hard lesson.Two years ago, my first step was to admit that I couldn’tjust ignore the migraines and hope they went away. Ineeded to be proactive. I had been to neurologists in thepast that had advised me to go on preventative medication,but had been resistant to the idea. After deciding that nowwas the time to take that step, I found a neurologist whoput me on a daily cocktail of four different preventativemedications. She also gave me a drug combination to takewhen I get severe migraines. I meet with her every monthwithout fail. During those meetings, she checks over thedaily tracking form she has me fill out on my migrainestatus, which ranks each morning, afternoon, and nightfrom 0 to 3, depending on severity. Based on that form,she adjusts my medication in response to the frequencyof the migraines during the month, and talks to me aboutalternative treatments.When I first started paying serious attention to mymigraines, I gathered information from the Internet andbooks in an effort to learn how to function better. Oneof the books I found was called The Migraine Brain byCarolyn Berstein. In it, Berstein suggests finding yourtriggers. I started to log everything — what I ate, howmuch I slept, what the weather was like, anything I couldthink of. I found out that I have a lot of triggers: such as adrop in barometric pressure, eating MSG, spending a lot oftime in a room with a lit scented candle, sleeping poorly orbeing around loud noises... The list goes on and on. Findingtriggers is an ongoing process. Even after two years, I’mstill discovering them. What is most frustrating are the dayswhen I get a migraine and I have no idea what caused it.So, how do I live my life daily with migraines? By thenumbers. On the rare ‘zero’ days I celebrate and takeadvantage of life. I’ll open the shades and light a scentedcandle. Or wear perfume and turn on my music loud andapologize to the neighbors later. I might go out to a noisyrestaurant and actually eat there instead of taking food outto eat at home, where there’s minimal noise, smell, and light.Or see a movie in the theater. On ‘level one’ days, I domy best to ignore the slight migraine, but my face changesslightly and my neck tenses. I draw the shades and wearsunglasses outside even if it’s overcast because I’m sensitiveto light. I spend as little time as possible in noisy situations.Other than being more aware and avoiding stimulation,on level one days, I can still function relatively well in theoutside world. On ‘level two’ days, the migraine intensifiesto a full ‘headache face,’ stiff neck making it hard to turnmy head, and knots down my back. These days, I limit mymovements, stay as quiet as possible, and keep the lightson low, with the shades drawn, maybe taking a painkillerdepending on what I have to do during the day. But mostof the time I still try to function adaptively in a version ofnormal in the outside world. On level one and two days Itry especially hard to avoid known triggers as they can takea one or two and blow it to a ‘three’ pretty quickly. Onlevel three days life shuts down and I retreat to my ‘cave’ —my bedroom with the blackout curtains. I usually have toput a heating pad down my neck, back and shoulder and layin the dark, waiting for my time to rejoin the world.Like anyone with chronic pain, I have days whereacceptance of migraines in my life isn’t as easy as others.After two years of concentrated efforts and still havingmigraines at least 3-4 times a week, I have times where I getfrustrated and fed up. I get tired of living a version of lifethat’s not conventionally considered normal — one that’sspent avoiding loud noises and smells — living carefullyand avoiding triggers. The majority of the time though,I try to incorporate my migraines into my life instead ofhaving them rule my life. I make a version of my life that’snormal with migraines. I make it work.Above all, I’ve hung on to hope that it won’t be like thisforever. At my last monthly appointment, the neurologisttalked to me about a Botox treatment for migraines.Maybe I’ll give it a try? I wouldn’t mind getting rid of afew wrinkles at the same time as a few headaches! Thissummer I plan on going to a headache clinic in the Statesand can’t wait to learn more there. In the meantime,however, I’m living my life day-by-day, by the numbers,praying that today will be a zero day.This article was written anonymously. If you are someone who suffers with chronic pain, please call The <strong>Center</strong> toschedule an appointment with a counsellor.28march 2012 www.communitycenter.org.tw
The ‘Maple Leaf’ExperienceGeneration yTexT: LeaT ahronyWhen you grow up in one country all ofyour life, there is only that one placethat is familiar to you. For me, this wasTaiwan. Before graduation, I was setfor a new journey. After a term at the University ofVictoria and five months in Canada, I now realize howimportant diversity is.To find one's niche in university life can bechallenging when you are dealing with a long list ofadjustments. It is natural for international studentssharing similar backgrounds to group together."UVic has diversity," said one UVic student fromCalgary, "but I find that many of the internationalstudents tend to stick to each other like glue." Thisis quite noticeable around the campus. Over time,however, international students familiarize with thenew culture and environment. They slowly releasethemselves, and engage with students of othercultures and ethnic backgrounds.On August 29th, 2011, I landed on Canadian soil.As I scanned the immigration lines, diversity filled thespace around me. My parents were worried aboutme leaving an Asian environment, but I feel as thoughI am surrounded by it. A spark inside me jumpedwhen I spotted Chinese characters on store signs.Fairway supermarket had it all: Bok Choy, Chinesewhite cabbage, bean sprouts, bitter melon, YowChoy, and not one, but three types of tofu. Hearingthe cap seal break on a container of soy milk wasmusic to my ears: the rich aroma of fresh soy beansbrought me back to the breakfast stores in Taiwan.With one sip, I was home. It wasn’t So Good,Silk, or Vita Soy. It was creamy, rich, pure, andplain ground soy beans with water. Chinatown indowntown Victoria is fascinating and familiar. Therewere exciting festivities and celebrations for ChineseNew Year. But it was not enough to satisfy myinterest, and I started to feel like a Canadian when Ibecame curious about other cultures, religions, andpractices.I met people from different provinces of Canada.I conversed with people from Germany, Scotland,Denmark, India, Iran, the Philippines, China,Singapore, Malaysia, and Taiwan. Learning aboutdifferent cultures was colorful and fulfilling, likeeating a bowl of Tang Yuan. It was entertaining tocompare accents. Doing this opened my eyes andaccelerated curiosity levels. There is little diversity onthe streets of Taipei, but it is everywhere in Canada.I am drawn by Canada’s quality of life, and itsreputation as a peaceful, open, and caring society thatwelcomes newcomers and values diversity. I feel theworld as a whole lacks this quality and reputation. Ihave met numerous immigrants who have been livingin Canada for over twenty years. When asked ifthey felt like outsiders, they all said no, despite lowEnglish ability. There is a certain degree of diversityin every country, but to me, Canada seems one of themore welcoming places for immigrants.The color of our skin is only an outlook. Thefeatures of our face and the sizes of our bodies arepieced together by million of strands of DNA. Thelanguages we use to communicate may be different,but nothing can stop us from learning. My father —who has lived in Taiwan for thirty years — still doesnot speak Mandarin. He shops in the traditionalfood markets with a few familiar Chinese sentencesin mind, and makes use of creative body language.The environment you grow up in certainly affectsyour customs, behaviors, values, language, practices,and more. However, every human has the right tointeract with each other, explore new places, andcherish different cultures and ethnicities. I ask myselfwhy the globe is round and not square or triangular.It signifies unity. Humans are all the same insideand out: skin, cells, fat, and bone. When we die andreturn back to the earth, nothing differentiates usfrom one another.Some people may say leaving your home, aplace you have known all your life, is an arduousjourney. If Canada is your new destination though,your experience will be less of a challenge because,in my opinion, in this peaceful and multiculturalnation you have all the support and culturaldiversity you will need. The maple leaf symbol isfound in every Canadian province. It symbolizesequity, unity, and cultural diversity. Although theycarry the same generic shape and form, every leafis unique. Canadians value and cherish differentcultures that augment our knowledge beyond ourfamiliar surroundings and enhance our everydaylives. Taiwan is a magical place, and Taipei AmericanSchool was an excellent school both academically andsocially, but going abroad for university was the bestdecision I ever made.Leat Ahrony is a business undergraduate student at the University of Victoria (UVic)in Canada. She began her journalism career in high school writing for the <strong>Center</strong>ed onTaipei magazine. She has a weekly online column for the UVic newspaper, The Martlet,and regularly writes print news and culture articles. She plans to earn her B.A incommerce and continue a side career in journalism.www.communitycenter.org.tw march 201229