The secret garden

'364 THE SECRET GARDENhorribly unlike the happy eyes he had adored, hecould not bear the sight of them and turned awaypale as death. After that he scarcely ever sawhim except when he was asleep, and all he knewof him was that he was a confirmed invalid, witha vicious, hysterical, half-insane temper. He couldonly be kept from furies dangerous to himself bybeing given his own way in every detail.All this was not an uplifting thing to recall, butas the train whirled him through mountain passesand golden plains the man who was ' comingalive " began to think in a new way and he thoughtlong and steadily and deeply." Perhaps I have been allwrong for ten years/ 1he said to himself. Ten yearsis a long time.It may be too late to do anything quite toolate. What have I been thinking of!Of course this was the wrong Magicto begin'by saying too late." Even Colin could havetold him that. But he knew nothing of Magiceither black or white. This he had yet to learn.He wondered if Susan Sowerby had taken courageand written to him only because the motherly creaturehad realized that the boy was much worsewas fatallyill. If he had not been under thespell of the curious calmness which had taken possessionof him he would have been more wretchedthan ever. But the calm had brought a sort ofcourage and hope with it.Instead of giving way