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the essential guide - Texas Council on Family Violence

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provide a unified statewide presence. Given how little we knew about o<str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>r state and nati<strong>on</strong>al efforts,we chose <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> name <str<strong>on</strong>g>Texas</str<strong>on</strong>g> Commissi<strong>on</strong> <strong>on</strong> <strong>Family</strong> <strong>Violence</strong> and set out to incorporate at <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> Secretary ofState’s Office. Our applicati<strong>on</strong> to incorporate was denied with <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> Secretary informing us that it was notpossible to be called a Commissi<strong>on</strong> unless <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> entity was appointed by <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> Governor and c<strong>on</strong>firmed by<str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> Senate! And that is how we became <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> <str<strong>on</strong>g>Council</str<strong>on</strong>g>…not knowing that in most o<str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>r states <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> nameCoaliti<strong>on</strong> would be chosen for <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> statewide efforts.We sought to create opportunities for cooperati<strong>on</strong>, coordinati<strong>on</strong> and collaborati<strong>on</strong> with <strong>on</strong>e ano<str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>r andwith a myriad of professi<strong>on</strong>als and o<str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>r organizati<strong>on</strong>s coming into c<strong>on</strong>tact with victims, offenders and<str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>ir children as well as to improve laws and policies to hold offenders accountable and increase <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>safety of victims. Our original motto was Share What You Have, Ask for What You Need.Prior to this formati<strong>on</strong> meeting, several of those involved with <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> nine groups present initiated <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>provisi<strong>on</strong> of some emergency family violence services and began to analyze <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> challenges for batteredwomen and <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>ir children— many while resp<strong>on</strong>ding to sexual violence. The Austin Rape Crisis Center, <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>first rape crisis center in <str<strong>on</strong>g>Texas</str<strong>on</strong>g>, opened in 1974, and we immediately began to receive calls from sexualassault victims but also from those caught in an abusive relati<strong>on</strong>ship. Victims would say things like, “Canyou help me? I wasn’t raped by a stranger…I was beaten and raped by my husband.” For me and someo<str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>rs, this was our first awareness of individuals committing acts of violence against <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>ir wives orgirlfriends and children. There were also those am<strong>on</strong>g <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> early organizers of <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> TCFV who knew all toowell from <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>ir own family experiences that this was a reality. As o<str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>r communities in <str<strong>on</strong>g>Texas</str<strong>on</strong>g> organizedto resp<strong>on</strong>d to sexual violence, <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>y too began to recognize <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>existence and need for services for victims of domestic violence.At <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> formati<strong>on</strong> meeting we adopted a flat, n<strong>on</strong>-hierarchicalstructure for working toge<str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>r and appointed individuals to <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>Board of Directors to serve in roles mirroring those often found inn<strong>on</strong>profit boards. We also created roles particular to <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> work wesaw TCFV as performing <strong>on</strong> behalf of its members, <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> localshelters and o<str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>r direct service providers as well as individualswho supported ending violence. As a result, our first “Chair” or“President” of <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> Board was called <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> Coordinator of InternalCommunicati<strong>on</strong>. Toby Myers with <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> Houst<strong>on</strong> Area Women’sCenter was selected to hold this key positi<strong>on</strong>. Toby says it wasbecause she was working at a state agency, <str<strong>on</strong>g>Texas</str<strong>on</strong>g> ResearchInstitute of <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> Mental Sciences, and had access to toll-free calling.But it was much more than that.Tobey MyersAs a formerly battered woman who was providing help to o<str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>rs, she embodied <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> combinati<strong>on</strong> ofpers<strong>on</strong>al experience, formal educati<strong>on</strong> (doctorate) and professi<strong>on</strong>al services (counseling) that we knewwould help articulate <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> missi<strong>on</strong> and build <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> organizati<strong>on</strong>. When she stepped down as Coordinator ofInternal Communicati<strong>on</strong>s, after two years, she remained <strong>on</strong> <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> board. She was <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>n elected to <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g>positi<strong>on</strong> of Representative of <str<strong>on</strong>g>Texas</str<strong>on</strong>g> to <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> Nati<strong>on</strong>al Coaliti<strong>on</strong> Against Domestic <strong>Violence</strong> (NCADV) andlater was designated as a life-time member when <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> bylaws were changed to a more typical structure.Toby c<strong>on</strong>sistently brought passi<strong>on</strong>, persistence and perspective to <str<strong>on</strong>g>the</str<strong>on</strong>g> Board.THE ESSENTIAL GUIDE: AN INTRODUCTION TO ADVOCATING FOR SURVIVORS OF FAMILY VIOLENCE4 | P a g e

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