The Pace Setter - Hudson Mohawk Road Runners Club

100 th B2B 12K –The Sideshow Awards Go Westby Bob KopacThe first article I ever wrote was in 1996about Sideshow Awards I gave to costumedrunners at the 100th Boston Marathon. Onerunner ran with an 8-foot tall replica of the OldNorth Church steeple strapped to his back. Igave him the “Go-to-Church,-Church-to-Go”Award. He had a sign saying he had carriedthe steeple at the San Francisco Bay to Breakers12K. Fast forward to 2011 and the 100thanniversary of B2B -- it was time for the SideshowAwards to head west!B2B has a split personality. There were eliteathletes such as Meb Keflezighi and B2B winnersRidouane Harroufi of Morocco and LinethChepkurui of Kenya. There also were participantswho dressed in elaborate costumes – ornothing at all. It IS San Francisco, after all. It is arace you do not necessarily win by a nose. Toencourage costumed runners, B2B gives prizesin 5 separate costume categories – perfect forthe Sideshow Awards.My wife Lynne wore everything pink: angelwings, tutu, iRUNLIKEAGIRL top, fingerlessmesh gloves, headband with a flower, hair extensions,peace sign socks, and a magic wandto keep the rain away. Our friend Pat DeHavenwore a samurai headband; during the race arunner informed him that he was wearingit upside down. Since it was San Francisco, Iwore a purple tie-dye T-shirt adorned with alarge psychedelic peace sign, with spandexshorts, knee socks, wristbands, and head bandannaall emblazoned with peace symbols.Peace Out.I obtained press credentials. However, insteadof shooting at the start or finish lines, Ihad the bright idea – or so it seemed at thetime – to run the race carrying a heavy SLRcamera. What was I thinking? Although I hadtrained for a 12K, I had mistrained for this race.While running, I would see costumed runnersin front of me, so I would sprint to get ahead ofthem, stop, spin, and shoot the photos. I calledit my “Run-and-Shoot” Offense. I ended upsprinting the entire 12K while photographingthe following Sideshow Award winners:The “Hitting the Wall” Award goes to therunners wearing walled costumes, one ofwhich said, “Does This Wall Make Me LookFlat?”The “We Who Are About to Sweat, SaluteYou” Award goes to the runner dressed as aRoman soldier.The “Spawn of the Dead” Award goes tothe salmon runners who started at the finishline and ran to the starting line through thestream of runners – a B2B tradition.The “Play Miss Deed for Me” Award goes tothe group of women wearing beauty pageantgowns and sashes that read “Miss Behaved”,“Miss Conduct”, “Miss Read”, “Miss Managed”,and “Miss Deed”.The “Breakfast at B2B” Award goes to therunners dressed in Tiffany & Co. blue boxes.The “Udder Madness” Award goes to therunners dressed as cows.The “Project Runway” Award goes to thefemale runner who cut her bib number in halfand used the halves to cover her bra.The “Let Them Eat Cake” Award goes tothe runner wearing a cake costume with oneenormous candle.The “Gone With THE WIND” Award goesto runners at the finish line wearing sheets, eachsheet having a single word: “SIX”, “SHEETS”,and “TO”, and whose teammates appeared tohave gone.The “Billy Joel Scenes from an Italian Restaurant”Award goes to the runners dressedas tables with red-and-white-checkered tablecloths,food, wine glasses and wine bottles.The “B2B Can Be Hazardous to yourHealth” Award goes to the runners dressed inhazmat outfits.The “Kermit Green with Envy” Award goesto the runners dressed as Muppets who mademost other competitors green with envy.Speaking of green, the “I’m Melting! Not!”Award goes to the woman dressed as theWicked Witch of the West who survived the5-minute drizzle during the race.The “Ghost of B2B Past” Award goes to thefamily dressed in gray formal wear and grayface paint to represent the participants of theinaugural Cross City 1912 race, which later becamethe Bay to Breakers 12K.The Gypsy Rose Lee” Best Costume Awardgoes to the 2 women covered head to foot inballoons.The http://tinyurl.com/B2B2011PhotosBy-BobKopac web site contains these and otherG-rated photos. I created a separate URL containingphotos for mature audiences. Duringthe race I ran behind 5 nude men and a nudewoman. I sprinted ahead of them, spun, andtook photos. After they passed me, I founda string of beads on the ground. I picked upthe necklace, sprinted, and said, “Hey, nakedlady!” When she turned, I handed her thebeads and said, “It’s Mardi Gras!” She smiledand put on the necklace. That meant I HAD tosprint ahead of her to take shots of her wearingthe beads. No wonder I was tired at the end ofthe race! rThe Pace Setter – 15