THE WOMEN AROUND JOHN WESLEY AT HOME ... - Kristoffersen

“Ere thy gentle breast sustainsLatest, fiercest, mortal pains,Hear a suppliant! Let me bePartner in thy destiny!”Grief came from the depth of her soul, and soundsas if Hetty wished to die with her child. When her fourthchild died, she had reached the utmost despair.She had tried to make herself as attractive aspossible, to get her husband away from alcohol. Now thehope seemed to be vanishing for her to get a child thatcould awaken her husband´ s fatherly feelings for his child,so that it could get him away from the pubs.SHE BELIEVES IN BEING CURSEDAll the disappointments and bad luck, that Hettyhad experienced, made her believe that she was under acurse from God, and that nothing that she did could atoneher past with God. Here the old relation to her father layaching. She felt the need of his forgiveness. The relation ofperson to person with acceptance and forgiveness has aninner healing effect. Her father, however, hindered herfrom experiencing this liberation. She longed for her fatherto forgive her. That is the reason why that she wrote to herfather and asked forgiveness. The letter finished with thefollowing words:“But I have come to a point where I feelyour forgiveness to be necessary to me.I beseech you, then, not to withhold it.50