Dwa Fanm - Hot Peach Pages

Produced by Dwa Fanm. P.O. Box 23505. Brooklyn, NY 11215. 718-230-4027. F: 718-230-3194. www.dwafan.orgMyths and Facts About Domestic ViolenceMyth #1FACT:Battering is rare.Battering is extremely common. The F.B.I. estimates that a woman is battered every fifteen secondsin the United States.Myth #2FACT:Domestic violence occurs only in poor, poorly educated, minority or "dysfunctional" families. Itcould never happen to anyone I know.There are doctors, ministers, psychologists, and professionals who beat their wives. Batteringhappens in rich, white, educated and respectable families. About half of the couples in this countryexperience violence at some time in their relationship.Myth #3FACT:Battering is about couples getting into a brawl -on Saturday night beating each other up, and totallydisrupting the neighbo rhood.In domestic assaults, one partner is beating, intimidating, and terrorizing the other. It's not "mutualcombat" or two people in a fist fight. It's one person dominating and controlling the other.Myth #4FACT:The problem is not really woman abuse. It is spouse abuse. Women are just as violent as men.In over 95% of domestic assaults, the man is the perpetrator. This fact makes many of usuncomfortable, but is no less true because of that discomfort. To end domestic violence, we mustscrutinize why is it usually men who are violent in partnerships. We must examine the historic andlegal permission that men have been given to be violent in general, and to be violent towards theirwives and children specifically. There are rare cases - where a woman batters a man. Battering doesoccurin lesbian and gay male-relationships. Survivors of abuse in such relationships should hear thatbecause their situation is rare -or because they are in a socially unacceptable relationship – that doesnot make it less valid or serious. Domestic Violence is wrong in all relationships.Myth #5FACT:When there is violence in the family, all members of the family are participating in the dynamic, andtherefore all must change for the violence to stop.Only the perpetrator has the ability to stop the violence. Many women who are battered makenumerous attempts to change their behaviour in hope that this will stop the abuse. This does notwork. Changes in family members’ behaviours will not cause or influence the batterer to be nonviolent.Myth #6FACT:Myth #7Batterers are crazy.An extremely small percentage of batterers are mentally ill. The vast majority seem totally normal,and are often charming, persuasive, and rational. The major difference between them and others isthat they use force and intimidation to control their partners. Battering is a behavioural choice.Domestic violence is usually a one time event, an isolated incident.7